废柴联盟（2009）

Community S02E18

Part 2 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:18 a.m.

Not cool, Shirley.
这样不好雪瑞
Besides, as your friend, can I tell you,
再有作为你的朋友我要告诉你
Don't poke that bear.
别提这岔事儿
I mean, I think right now
我是说你现在
you're as protected as you can get.
已经被保护得够周全了
I don't see Chang as being a real hands-on baby daddy.
我看昌不像是想当爹的人
Oh, so now we're all in the business of knowing
这么说咱都知道昌那家伙
what's going on in Chang's head, huh?
脑子里想的什么是吗
Huh?
是吗
Fine. For the child.
好吧看在娃的份儿上
God bless you. Not lately.
上帝保佑你那你还来烦我
Oh, I'm, um-- oh, I'm so sorry,
那个真不好意思
but could you just not tell Troy and Abed
但今晚咱们约会的事
that we went out tonight?
能别告诉阿布蒂和特洛伊吗
No problem.
没问题
It's just, um-- they're just really worried
其实就是他们很担心
if you and I, you know, see each other
如果咱俩你懂得约会见面的话
that it's somehow gonna affect your friendship with them.
可能对你们仨的友谊会有点影响
Hey, don't worry. Don't worry.
别担心别担心
I can keep a secret.
哥嘴可严着呢
I'm from the Balkans.
我可是从巴尔干半岛来的
There are many things I try not to talk about.
哥心里憋的事儿可多了
Lukka...
卢卡
I knew it.
我就知道
I knew there was pain in there.
我就知道你心底曾留有伤痛
Just so you know,
你要知道
you can talk to me about anything.
你大可以跟我推心置腹
So much killing...
大肆杀戮
The corpses stacked like firewood,
横尸遍野
the rivers red with their blood--
血流成河
I miss it so much.
真怀念那种日子
Oh, Lukka.
哦卢卡
Mm. Wait, just, um-- just to clarify,
等下先问明白
when you say you miss it,
你刚说怀念
it's like--like you have survivor's guilt,
是指大难不死而心生愧疚的感觉吗
like you wish you were back over there
希望重返故土
defending the motherland, right?
保卫祖国的意思是吧
Yes, I-I miss cleansing our fields and forests
对劣等人用不正当手段侵占了我的祖国
of the unclean people who stole my country.
我着实怀念那种追杀清洗的感觉
I miss the smell of the villages burning.
想念烧毁村庄时火光冲天的味道
I miss the way they used to
想念开着坦克
run from our tanks in fear.
看贱民四处逃窜的样子
Ah, damn it.
见鬼
My neighbor is jazz musician.
我邻居是个爵士乐手
Hey, Spencer, come on, man.
喂斯潘塞拜托
I got woman in here!
哥这正泡着妞呢
Great.
真是的
He really knows how to kill the mood.
这家伙最擅长破坏性致了
What are you doing? Did you look for a job today?
你干吗呢不是今天去找工作吗
I was going to,
本来是要去的
but I noticed your coffee table's wobbly,
但我发现你的咖啡桌有点晃
so I decided to fix it.
所以我决定修好它
It must be the floor.
肯定是地板的原因
Don't saw the floor. Don't saw anything.
别锯地板什么都别锯
I'm tired of confiscating saws. Give me that.
我快烦死收缴锯子了给我
Take this.
拿着这个
"Parental rights"?
亲权
You're adopting me? It's from Shirley.
你要收养我吗是雪瑞给你的
It gives her and Andre the baby.
表示你将孩子交由她跟安德烈抚养
Sign it.
签字吧
Oh, and if anyone asks,
要是有人问的话
this was my most convincing speech ever.
我会说这是本人最给力的演讲
Why are you crying?
你哭什么啊
Don't tell me you actually wanted to be a father.
别跟我说你真想当爸爸
I don't know.
我不知道
Maybe.
也许吧
I mean, what if this is my last chance?
万一这是哥的最后一发了呢
I mean, between you and me, I don't Chang a lot of chicks.
咱私下里说我把妹可不多
But fathers are responsible. They have jobs.
但当爹的一般都是有工作的靠谱男
You, you crash on people's couches
你呢你赖在别人家的沙发上
and twitch in your sleep like a dog dreaming of a rabbit.
睡觉时还乱抽抽跟狗梦见撵兔子似的
It's real! You don't--
真的你不
Wait.
等下
So you're saying if I get a job and my own apartment,
这么说要是我有房♥有工作
Shirley might let me be part of my baby's life?
雪瑞就有可能让我常伴我儿身边啦
Yes.
没错
That's exactly what I'm saying.
哥就是这个意思
So does that mean I can...? Go for it.
所以这么说我可以放手去搏吧
Where do you keep getting these?
你从哪搞来这么多
Hey, guys, where are you going?
你们好干吗去
We're grabbing lunch for
我们买♥♥些午餐
a Marathon video game session with Lukka.
然后和卢卡一起玩马拉松电子游戏
Lots of fork foods--don't want to grease up the troops.
很多是叉着吃的哥不想满手沾油
Oh, speaking of Lukka,
说到卢卡
how much do you guys know about him, anyway?
你们到底对他了解有多少
Why? Did you start dating him,
干吗你是不是已经跟他交往
and now you want to tell us horrible things about him?
现在想过来跟我们吐槽
What? No.
什么哪有
Good, 'cause Lukka's gonna teach us
很好因为卢卡正要教我们
how to break the will of an entire village
如何通过屠♥杀♥村民的家畜
by killing their livestock
侮辱他们的朝拜场所
And desecrating their places of worship.
来摧毁整个村庄的意志
That sounds horrific.
这听起来好恐怖
Ugh. Girls are so un-desensitized.
受不了女人总是喜欢大惊小怪的
Jeffrey.
杰夫瑞
Hey, guys. Hey, man.
你们好你好
Hi. So, um, how'd that little talk
嗨那个昨晚跟昌同学谈心
go with Chang last night?
谈的结果如何啊
Yeah, about that, Shirley,
既然你问了雪瑞
I gave my most convincing speech ever,
我可是使出浑身解数极力游说
and it didn't take. Didn't take?
但没成功没成功
We're not giving him a perm, Jeff.
我们又不是要给他烫头
We just need to him to sign a contract.
就只要他在协议上签个字而已
Well, "Need" is-- is a strong word.
说"要"可能有些言重了
I think Shirley would feel more comfortable
依我看如果我们有书面保证
if we had something in writing.
雪瑞心里会更踏实一些
However, I believe that we can handle
当然我相信我们夫妻同心
whatever obstacle comes our way.
其利断金必能打倒一切拦路虎
Aw, baby.
心肝儿
Well, good, good morning, everybody.
早上好各位
Did you see the stock market today?
你们看今天股市动向了没
Up, down-- pick a direction, huh?
跌宕起伏得找准方向是吧
Man, I don't know about you guys,
话说我不知道你们怎么样
but I've been circling these want ads all morning.
我可是一早上都在看招聘广♥告♥哦
Now, who wants to take a break and build a birdhouse?
现在谁想放松一下建个鸟窝啥的
Chang, what's going on?
昌你又抽哪门子疯呢
I'm just getting my act together.
我这是在重新振作啊
I got a baby coming.
咱可是马上就有娃的人了
I can almost hear the pitter-patter
我几乎可以听到中国娃娃的小脚丫
of little chinese feet across the treetops.
噼里啪啦的从树梢中穿行而过
And when that happens,
到那个时候
I got to be the best dad I can be.
我一定要做世上最好的爸爸
Right, Jeff, huh?
对吧杰夫
Come on, don't leave me hanging,
拜托不要让我冷场嘛
my main mentor.
我的大导师
Oh, hey, is that a reason to leave?
看那上面写了"溜之大吉"耶
Jeffrey? Excuse me.
杰夫瑞让开
Jeffrey!
杰夫瑞
Let me ask you a question, dad-to-dad.
我问你一个问题父亲之间的
Why do I have to put the VCR on three
请问《识骨追踪》在五频道播