大城小妞（2014）

Broad City S05E08

Part 2 Oct. 14, 2020, 10:26 a.m.

Jesus. You -- I trust you.
老天你我相信你
Me? Oh, my God!
我我的天
No! What?!
不搞什么
Are you bothering this girl?
你在骚扰她吗
Ilana?
阿♥拉♥娜
Okay. God, let's go. Come on.
天我们走快
Oh, cute.
可爱
Oh, my God.
我的天
Okay, I can't look. What do you think's gonna happen to her?
我不敢看你觉得她会遭遇什么
Ab, if this is too scary for you, we can go.
小艾如果太吓人我们可以走
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no.
嗯嗯嗯不不不
Yeah, it's just kind of scary not knowing,
只是不知道接下来会发生什么
like, what's gonna happen next.
这有点吓人
We gotta do new stuff and expand.
我们得尝试新事物扩张
It's the best part of life!
这是生活最棒的地方
Even if we are scared and terrified, we gotta do it --
就算我们害怕我们也得做
like, new parts of the world, new ideas,
去世界上没去过的地方新的主意
new -- new parts of the -- the country.
国内没去过的地方
Ooh, like Queens. Yeah, yeah.
比如皇后区对对
Or, like, further wherever, you know?
反正就是更远的地方不管是哪
Like, I'm in, dude.
算上我
Girl, I love inner. Go in. Go deep.
我喜欢内在深入去往深处
And, you know, when your best friend is by your side,
当你最好的朋友在你身旁
there's nothing to fear.
就没什么好怕的
Oh, man.
天
Ew, do you smell that?
你闻到了吗
Yeah, someone must have crop-dusted us all, huh?
嗯肯定有人朝我们放了屁
Brilliant theatrical choice!
绝妙的戏剧效果
It was me.
是我
Wait.
等等
Oh, my God. Shitfuck. Nurses are never good.
天啊我靠护士从来都不是好东西
Although I do love the long-lost art of letter-writing.
尽管我很喜欢失传已久的书信艺术
I'm just like, "Where are the chills and/or thrills?"
"令人心惊胆战的东西都在哪儿"
You know, I want to be either really scared or really horny.
我希望要么不寒而栗要么欲♥火♥中烧
Are you kidding me?
你逗我吗
This is the creepiest fucking thing I've ever seen.
这是我见过的最瘆人的事了
Oh, my God!
我的天
I don't want to go on!
我不想继续看下去了
Yeah, it's working.
有作用了
It's working.
有作用了
Gorgeous cursive.
草书很赞
Yes! Candy! Okay, jackpot.
棒糖果中奖了
Oh, my God.
天啊
Except...
除了
I know what's going on. This is like --
我知道这是什么情况这就是
What if this is like a little sweet spot
万一这里表面最无害
so they -- you let your guard down
让你放下防备
'cause you're, like, surrounded by candy,
因为你周围都是糖果
and then this is where they really hit you
然后就在这时
with, like, the terrifying, like, terrible stuff.
他们给你上演超恐怖的东西
Chill out. Nothing terrible's gonna happen.
淡定不会有可怕的事发生
I mean, you don't know that, but --
你可说不好
In fact...
事实上
I know how to make a sweet memory even sweeter.
我知道怎么让美好回忆更加美好
Okay.
好吧
Abbi, you are the best thing that's ever come into my life,
艾比你是我生活里最美好的事
and I know I'm taking a big swing here,
我知道机会不大
but I'm just gonna go for it.
但我还是要说出来
So, as I look for a roommate to replace Jaimé,
我正在找室友替代海眉
I'm thinking, like,
我在想
"Abbi and I spend a lot of time together.
我和艾比相处的时间很多
We get along."
我们很合得来
Why not spend more time together?
为什么不再多相处呢
I'm talking covering each other's rent once in a while.
我们可以偶尔帮对方交房♥租
I'm talking knowing what each other's orgasms sound like
知道彼此高♥潮♥声是怎样的
instead of merely fantasizing about it.
而不用去幻想
Abbi Gary Anna Abrams...
艾比·加里·安娜·艾布拉姆斯
...will you be my roommate?
你愿意做我的室友吗
Uh, I...
我
You know what?
知道吗
Don't even worry about it. Never happened.
别担心当我没说
I-I get it.
我懂的
I acknowledged the swing-size,
我知道这是个不小的请求
and I even secured a backup offer.
我甚至谈好了一个后备要约
She's very fucking cool, so it's -- it's chill.
她很酷所以没关系
It's -- It's chill. I really...
没关系我真的
It's cool.
没事
No. No, no, no -- Wait, wait, wait.
不不不等等等等
Dude, not -- It's...
姐们不是
Fuck. Okay.
靠好吧
You're scaring me.
你吓到我了
I-I didn't want to tell you when we were in here.
我不想在这里面告诉你的
All right, all right.
好的好的
I-I was going to tell you today.
我打算今天告诉你的
Um, I got accepted
我入围了
to an artists' residency program
一个艺术家入驻项目
in Boulder...
在科罗拉多州
Colorado.
波尔得
And I'm gonna go.
我准备过去
I was, um, gonna sell my shit
我打算卖♥♥掉我的东西
and use this as an opportunity to move.
借此机会搬走
What... Ilana!
什么阿♥拉♥娜
...the fuck... Dude? Ilana?
搞什么阿♥拉♥娜
What are you talking about?!
你在说什么
Ilana, um...
阿♥拉♥娜
We need to get you into therapy today.
我们今天就得送你去看心理医生
This is an emergency, okay?!
这是紧急情况懂吗
This is an emergency!
这是紧急情况
Okay, fun fact-o, Ilana --
有趣事实阿♥拉♥娜
Did you know that you could fly to Boulder
你知道你可以飞去波尔德
on a connecting flight through O'Hare
在奥黑尔转机
with a layover in Pittsburgh for $42? I mean --
匹兹堡中转只要42美元吗
I had never looked up how to fly to "Boulder."
我从没查过去波尔德的航♥班♥
Ew!
恶心
All right, all right. O'Hare?!
好吧好吧奥黑尔
Let's just I don't know what that is!
我们我不知道那是啥
Is that Gaelic?!
是盖尔语吗
This is a little --
这有点
Google, what is Boulder?!
谷歌♥ 什么是波尔德
Jesus!
老天
No! God.
不要过来天啊
You didn't even tell me you were applying.
你都没跟我说你有申请
Do you not consider me someone to talk shit through with?
你难道不把我当做谈心的朋友吗
Are we not partners in that way?
我们不是这样的搭档吗
Of course I do, Ilana.
我当然当你是了阿♥拉♥娜
You're my only friend.
你是我唯一的朋友
Well, I guess you've been stuck with me for awhile,
我想你和我在一起了一段时间
but not anymore.
但以后不会了
No, dude, no. I-I don't feel that way.
不不我不那么想
Ilana, wait. Just wait.
阿♥拉♥娜等等等等
Oh, my goodness.
我的天
Ilana?
阿♥拉♥娜
Yeah. Vulva.
阴♥户♥
You have ruined the best part
你把这个交互式节目
of this interactive production for me. Not now.
最棒的部分给毁了现在不要
I'm sorry, dude. I-I'm sorry.
抱歉真的抱歉
I feel really stuck in my life right now, okay?
我感觉我的生活停滞不前好吗
Nope. Nothing.
没有感觉
I need a change.
我需要改变
This is just like you with grad school.
就跟你申请研究生一样