副校长（2016）

Vice Principals S02E09

Part 4 Aug. 22, 2020, 8:53 p.m.

Minimizing loss and injury should be the first goal.
我们去疏散学生
We evacuate.
为了我年幼的儿子我的妻子
...for my young son, my wife,
我拒绝放弃
but I refused to give in.
我怎能让过去的努力化为泡影
I worked too damn hard to let
让病魔结束我的人生
this disease cut my time short,
我知道我必须反抗我...
I knew I had to fight. I...
-我知道... -后退后退请后退
- I knew that -- - Back up, back up. Back up, please.
请大家保持冷静
Everyone please remain calm.
全体教职员工请各位起身
Faculty members, if you would all please rise,
请移♥动♥到你在橙色警戒时的指定位置
and please get into the assigned positions for a Code Orange.
这不是演习刚刚发生了一起事故
This is not a drill. There has been an incident.
学生们拜托保持冷静坐下
Students, please. Stay calm. Sit down.
我没叫你们...不别叫大家站起来
I didn't say -- no! Don't tell people to stand.
这不是橙色警戒时的规矩
That is not what we do in a Code Orange!
你搞什么德洛丽丝
What the fuck, Delores?
你以为自己是谁
Who the hell do you think you are,
居然在我儿子的毕业典礼上捣乱
messing up my son's graduation?
好吧你知道吗
Oh, okay, you know what?
现在真的不是你问我答的时候
This isn't really a question-answer thing right now,
因为眼下情况紧急
because this is a serious situation.
但如果你非知道不可
But if you must know,
曾与我有过一段地下情的女人
a woman that I had secret sexual relations with
基本上整个学年都在试图谋杀我
pretty much the whole entire school year tried to murder me.
在上个学期结束时她枪击了我
She shot me at the end of last semester,
然后现在又想要我的命
then returned to finish me off here,
她还试图杀掉我的好朋友李·罗素
and also tried to kill my very dear friend, Lee Russell,
和我的新女友阿曼达·斯♥诺♥格拉斯
and my new girlfriend, Amanda Snodgrass.
宝贝
Hey, baby.
那个女人还把老虎放出来了
And the woman also let out the tiger
就是刚才有好多人去合影的那只
that many of you were taking pictures with,
老虎吃了个人
and he ate a person.
别慌没事的情况已得到控制
Uh, uh, relax, it's okay. The situation is under control,
老虎被关起来了我们没事
and the tiger is contained, so we're good.
我们现在要做的
All we have to do now is
就是安全撤离确保没人受伤
evacuate safely and make sure nobody gets hurt.
我们从这边的侧门走
We're gonna use these side doors,
因为从那些门走会遇到吃人的老虎
because out those doors, the carnivorous creature roams.
闲言少叙
Without further ado,
作为北杰克逊高中的代理校长
as the acting principal of North Jackson High School,
我十分荣幸地宣布
it is with great honor that I begin
毕业撤离现在开始
the evacuation of this graduation.
那个驯兽员都被老虎啃烂了
Man, that tiger ate the shit out of that trainer.
急救员和动物管理局正在路上
Yeah, I got EMT and Animal Control on the way.
危机解除了
Crisis averted!
我们成功疏散了学校里的所有人
It seems like we got everybody out of the school.
你居然把我关进笼子你个金发婊
You gonna put me in a cage, you blonde bitch?
-你♥他♥妈♥闭嘴行吗 -糟了
- Oh, will you shut the fuck up? - Oh damn.
她按了那个按钮
She hit that button.
-她没按 -她按了
- No, she didn't. - Yes, she did.
它来咯它会把你们的脸啃掉
Here she comes! She's gonna eat your fucking face off.
我们跑什么
What are we running for?
-我一枪就能结果了它 -什么
- I can end this right here. - What?
没错射它丫的
Yes, shoot his ass.
-想尝尝枪子吗 -不
- You want some? - No.
-为啥不 -不必这样
- Yes! - Not like that.
-把枪放下 -你这他妈是搞什么
- Put the gun down. - What the fuck are you doing?
我在协调彼此
I'm harmonizing.
和老虎协调
With the tiger?
真♥相♥能使人自♥由♥
Learning that the truth can set a man free.
我掌控了自我与周围的世界融为一体
I'm mastering myself, becoming one with the world around me.
我今天已经战胜过死神了
I've already defied death once today.
我会再一次战胜他
I will do it again.
放松兄弟我也曾身处你的处境
Just relax, brother. I, too, have been where you are.
退下吧
Stand down.
-我♥操♥ -太好了
- Oh shit! - Yes!
那只老虎他妈的在啃罗素
The fucking tiger's eating Russell!
那只战虎正在学校里乱跑
Goddamn battle cat's loose in the school!
快跑快离开这里
Run! Get the fuck outta here!
罗素
Russell!
罗素
Russell!
我的天啊我♥操♥
Oh my god. Fuck.
我被那王八蛋咬了
Shithead got a piece of me.
别动知道吗
Don't move, okay?
你要保存体力
Uh, just-just save your energy.
我真不敢相信我被老虎啃了
I can't believe I got ate by a tiger.
这他妈是逗我玩吗
Are you fucking kidding me?
-太疯狂了 -我已经能看到头条了
- It's insane. - Oh, I can see it now.
"校长丧命虎口
"A principal gets eaten by a fucking tiger,
老虎本为校吉祥物"
a mascot of the school."
我一直渴望上新闻但这也太蠢了
I always wanted press, but god, this is so stupid.
保存体力别说话了好吗
Just save your energy. Don't talk, okay?
如果我这就要死了甘比
Well, if I die right now, Gamby,
我当然不希望就这样看着你安静地死去
I sure as hell don't wanna be staring at you just silently.
好吧说得也是
Okay, that's fair enough.
我这辈子过得最开心的...
This is the favorite year of...
就是今年
of my whole life.
我也是我知道我们的所作所为是错的
Mine too. I know what we did was wrong,
但...我当时很享受
but... I liked it.
那些日子很开心
It was fun.
-是的很开心 -是啊
- Yeah, it was fun. - Yeah.
让我们有机会了解彼此
It gave us a chance to get to know each other.
让我们成为了朋友
Let us become friends.
我从没有过像你这样的朋友罗素
Never had a friend like you before, Russell.
我爱你甘比
I love you, Gamby.
你也是我的好朋友伙计
You're my friend too, man.
朋你妈友
You fucking what?
你快点的快他妈说
Come on, man. Just-just fucking say it.
都到这地步了你就说吧
Honestly we're here, just say it.
说什么我说了你也是我的朋友
Say what? I told you that you're my friend too.
我刚说了我他妈爱你
Oh, I just told you that I fucking love you.
我听到了我只是不会对男性朋友说
Okay, I heard you. I just don't say that to my male friends.
我只对辣妹和我的家人说
I only say that to superhot babes and to my family.
苍天我快死了你♥他♥妈♥的
Jesus. I'm about to die, motherfucker.
-你不会死的罗素 -会的
- You're not gonna die, Russell. - I am.
我他妈快在这破学校的地板上因失血过多而死了
I'm gonna fucking bleed out on this stupid fucking school floor.
好好好
Okay, fine, fine.
说吧
Say it.
我
I--...
看着我
Look at me.
看着我
Look at me.
现在说出来吧
Now... just... say it.
我爱你罗素
I love you, Russell.
再说一次
One more time.
我爱你
I love you.
我也爱你甘比
I love you too, Gamby.
它回来了
Oh. She's back.
-苍天啊 -我他妈恨死老虎了
- Oh, Jesus Christ. - I fucking hate tigers.
兄弟走吧快离开这真的
Buddy, just go, just get out of here. Honestly.
保命要紧
Just save yourself, okay?
不罗素我不会丢下你不管
No, Russell. I'm not gonna leave you in here by yourself.
去他妈的两万五的老虎
Fuck this $25,000 tiger.
去你♥妈♥的♥老虎
Fucking cock-sucking fucking tiger.
你要吃了我的朋友
You're gonna eat my fucking friend?
小婊♥子♥
Well bitch--
去你♥妈♥的♥
Fuck you!
北杰克逊高中
三个月后
北杰克逊高中
-别紧张 -我没有
- Don't be nervous. - I'm not.
高中很可怕懂吗
High school is very intimidating, okay?
但你会习惯会挺下去的
But you'll get used to it. You'll learn to survive