副校长（2016）

Vice Principals S02E04

Part 3 Aug. 22, 2020, 8:52 p.m.

我怎么不知道
Well, that's news to me.
你当然不知道你一直都不在这
Of course it's news to you. You're never around!
你以为我们为什么把爸爸的东西都打包好
Why do you think we packed up all of Dad's stuff?
我要他的瓷器舒服的椅子
Yeah, I'm claiming his china, his comfy chair,
-还有他的旧海军杂♥志♥ -对
- and his old Navy magazines. - That's right.
他的碟片和步♥枪♥归我
And I've got his DVDs and his rifle.
你们有没有想过或许我也想要他的
Well, did you think that maybe I would want some of his
杂♥志♥或者步♥枪♥
magazines or his rifles?
就因为你们两个
Just 'cause you two
拍了他一辈子的马屁
French-kissed his asshole his whole fuckin' life--
你说什么
Excuse me?
打断一下我也要拿点东西这么着
Excuse me! I get some stuff too. And you know what?
-我先从这里拿起 -不行
- I'm going to start right here-- - No,
什么也不准拿
you're not gonna start anything.
李住手
Lee! Stop it!
这是我的已经归我了
That is mine! I fuckin' claimed it!
-你真搞笑你真搞笑 -你退后
- You're so funny. You're so funny. - You should back off.
我根本不想要这些玩意太傻♥逼♥了
I don't even want that. It's so stupid.
你知道什么才搞笑吗
You know what's funny?
你的逼脸
Is your fuckin' face,
你的小猪脸
your fuckin' little pig face.
-看见没这是我的 -随你便
- See this? It's mine. - Whatever.
行
Fine.
他的飞机模型
His model airplane.
你敢拿试试放下
Oh, no you don't. Hands off!
这些是给我的孩子的
Those are for our kids.
你不觉得你的孩子已经过了
Don't you think your kids are a little bit old
玩飞机模型的年龄了吗
to be playing with model airplanes?
你连孩子都没有
You don't even have kids.
那是因为他不能射♥精♥
That's 'cause he's shooting blanks.
琳恩
Uh-oh, Lynn.
小婊砸面红耳赤了
Her blood is boiling.
是啊人家恼羞成怒了
Oh yeah, she's gonna throw a hissy fit.
怎么你的脸怎么涨得通红
What, are you getting all... all red?
-你脸红了吗 -真搞笑
- Are you getting red? - Oh that's so funny,
-你又叫我"小婊砸"了 -瞧瞧
- you calling me "she" again. - Look at that.
你怎么不搞点新料
Why don't you get some new fuckin' material, all right?
李天呐搞什么
Lee. Jesus, what?
你裤子上的污点是什么
What is that stain on your pants,
李是吗看起来像精♥液♥
Lee? Oh yeah, that looks like cum.
-我没... -你又射到裤子上了吗
- I don't have-- - Did you cum on yourself again?
不不不不不
No, no, no, no! No, no!
不不不
No, no, no!
不不不不
No, no, no! No!
小脏娃
Dirty little boy!
求你了不不
Please-- No! No.
不莱西莱西求你了不
No, Lacey, Lacey. Please, no!
开门开门拜托
Open the door. Open the door, please?
知道吗
You know what?
去你♥妈♥的♥ 去你♥妈♥的♥
Fuck you! Fuck you!
说到野鹿的时候必须得
When you say venison, it has to have
饱含悲伤之情
all the sadness of the exile in that word.
走吧我们要不要把野鹿宰了吃
Sh-Come! Shall we go kill us some venison?
该死
Oh, shit.
甘尔·尼比先生
Mr. Geal Namby.
你的视频公告
Your video announcements
是今早最亮丽的风景
would have been the highlight of my morning,
可惜就像我们演员所说的你卡壳了
but you choked, as we actors say.
罗素昨天要的
Where are the curriculum proposals
课程计划书写得怎么样了
that Russell asked for yesterday?
很抱歉恐怕计划书得晚点交了
Excuse me if the proposals are a little bit tardy.
罗素整得我们全都衣衫不整精疲力尽
Russell has been running us ragged, stressing everybody out.
得了吧
Oh, give me a break.
你是个穿着紧身衣到处晃的成年人
You're a grown man who prances around in tights.
你想怎么样甘比
What the hell do you have to do? Gamby.
你不会要逼我们放学后留下来和汗狗一起吧
You're not gonna make us stay after school with the SweatDogs?
他们不是人
They're not human.
他们昨天威胁着要对我施水刑
They threatened to waterboard me yesterday.
你必须得去塞舌尔好吗
You're going, Seychelles, okay?
所以你就像个傀儡一样
So, he dreams it up, you execute it,
照着他的傻♥逼♥想法来整我们
like a little puppet man coming to fuck us.
你最好注意下你的用词
You better watch your tone.
我现在是校长听见没
I'm the principal, do you hear me?
你才不是校长
You're not the principal!
你只是个狐假虎威的纸片校长
You're just a flimsy cardboard cutout of a principal.
你只是个二流悲剧演员
You're just a two-bit thespian.
替身
Stand-in.
一日女王 -塞舌尔住嘴
- Queen for a day. - Seychelles, that's enough!
快给我回去
Get back in there and teach
教教孩子们怎么装模作样
these children how to play make-pretend.
就像你装模作样以为自己是校长一样
Just like you're making-pretend to be principal.
-滚蛋 -操♥你♥妈♥
- Fuck you. - Fuck you.
幼稚行为
Adolescent behavior.
怎么了
What is the matter?
你为什么这么不开心
Why are you so upset?
她们要把你送进养老院妈妈
They're putting you in a home, Momma,
可怕的养老院
a terrible, awful, nursing home.
这是我的意思
It's my idea.
我不想一个人住在这么大的老房♥子里
I don't want to live in this big old house all by myself.
我想和同龄人在一起
I want to be with people my own age.
她们给你洗♥脑♥了妈妈
They have brainwashed you, Momma.
那里的看护只会折磨老年人
It breaks my heart to think of you in a place like that
一想到你要住进那样的地方我就心碎不已
where the orderlies molest all the seniors.
住嘴
Stop.
琳恩和莱西的良心被狗吃了妈妈
Lynn and Lacey are rotten human beings, Momma.
我希望是她们死掉而不是爸爸
I wish that they had died instead of Daddy.
不准这样诅咒你的姐姐
Don't you go cursing your sisters like that.
我知道你和她们合不来也知道个中原因
I know you don't get along with them and I know why,
因为你觉得爸爸更喜欢她们
'cause you think Daddy liked them better.
或许是的但是...
Well, maybe, I do, yes, but...
我们再也无法确认了妈妈
we will never know if that's true or not, Momma.
不是真的他更喜欢她们
No, it's true. He loved them more.
-你姐姐是很坏 -对
- Your sisters are mean. - Yeah.
她们嘲笑你扒光你的衣服
They tease you, they strip off your clothes.
你觉得我瞎吗我都知道
Do you think I'm blind? I know that.
但是她们从不像你这么卑鄙
But they were never being sneaky like you.
你撒谎撒谎让人心痛
You told lies, lies that stung.
你♥爸♥不喜欢这样即使这是因她们而起
Daddy didn't like that, even if they caused it.
让你♥爸♥爸为你骄傲一回吧
Make your daddy proud of you for once.
你说得对妈妈
You're right, Momma.
我很抱歉
I'm... I'm sorry.
-我爱你 -我也爱你
- I love you. - I love you.
走开
Back it up.
甘比先生那些老师比恨你
Hey, Mr. Gamby, those teachers hate them SweatDogs
还恨那些汗狗
more than they hate your ass.
-说曹操曹操到 -该死
- Oh, here we go. - Oh, shit.
甘比这越来越荒谬了
Gamby, this is getting ridiculous.
汗狗要我们拍下
The SweatDogs want us to record
我们把午餐倒掉的画面
when we throw out our lunches now.
他们骚扰我们用餐
And they're harassing us about our diets.
嘘汗狗过来了
Shh. SweatDogs are coming.
-什么搞笑 -斯♥诺♥格拉斯女士
- What? Ridiculous. - Ms. Snodgrass.
蒂茨夫人午餐时间结束了
Mrs. Deets. Lunchtime is over.
没时间给你休息闲聊
There is no time for stop and chat.
这属于正常行为吗甘比先生
Is this normal behavior, Mr. Gamby.
休息闲聊吗
The stop and chats? Uh, I mean...
对啊老师经常吃完午饭
Yeah, the teachers usually do chitchat
-就闲聊一下 -这是你的责任是你的错
- after lunch. - That is your fault. I blame you.
你在助长这种行为
You are enabling this behavior.
听着我也知道该怎么当领导
Look, I know about being a leader too.