把妹大作战（2014）

我要学意大利老妇一样说话
What are you talking about?
你在说什么呢
I can't believe what are you going for.
我简直不敢相信你要做的事
Is there something you're not telling me? Are you pregnant?
你有事瞒着我吗 你怀孕了吗
Did Candace put a baby in you?
坎迪斯在你肚子里播种了吗
I know you're joking but I would happily carry that baby.
我知道你是说笑 但我倒乐意怀个孩子
Morning sickness, stretch marks. I want it all.
孕吐 妊娠纹 我都想试试
That's not the point. I think it's a little weird for you to hear,
那不是重点 我觉得你们听到这话会觉得很奇怪
especially you. Look, I get it.
特别是你 听着 我懂
You feel like I'm breaking
你觉得我是在拆散
up the best on-screen duo since "Will & Grace."
自从《威尔与格蕾丝》之后最棒的荧屏搭档
I just want to make sure you're not bummed out. I'm not bummed.
我只想确定你没伤心 我当然没伤心
I'm totally cool.
我好着呢
Hey, whose Twitter handle is cool Danny? Hm?
知道谁的推特用户名是"冷酷丹尼"吗
Not mine. Not mine. You know why?
不是我 不是我 知道为什么吗
I'm too cool for that.
我太酷了用不着那样
Ah. That sucks.
太逊了
Danny. Yes, my sweet little Will?
丹尼 怎么了 小宝贝儿威尔
Don't be a bitch.
别像个混♥蛋♥似的
Oh. I can't wait to dance at your wedding.
我迫不及待在你的婚礼上跳舞了
You know, when I was younger,
我年轻的时候
I almost got engaged but her brother talked me out of it
差点就订婚了 可她哥哥劝退了我
Really? What did he say?
真的吗 他说什么了
He said, "Brett, you have a beautiful penis"
他说"布雷特 你的丁丁很好看"
And... Dip.
接着弯腰
Woo! OK, guys. Help me out. What should I do for my wedding?
伙计们帮帮我 我该怎么筹划婚礼
I don't know where to begin.
我不知道该从哪着手
Charlotte, what did you do for your wedding?
夏洛特 你是怎么筹办婚礼的
Was it like a fairy tale?
是像童话一样吗
My wedding was exactly like a fairy tale.
我的婚礼的确很像童话
Um, once upon a time there was a princess with low self esteem...
曾经有一位公主 低声下气毫无自尊
and terrible taste in men.
挑男人也很没品位
She went to Las Vegas
她去了拉斯维加斯
and ate some magic beans.
吃了一些魔法豆
Then she married an evil ogre named Mark.
然后嫁给了名叫马克的邪恶食人魔
Mark put a baby in her, and ruined her credit.
马克让她怀了孕 还败坏了她的信誉
12 weeks later a wizard named Jeff,
十二周后 一个名叫杰夫的男巫
the divorce attorney, annulled her mistake.
一名离婚律师 解除了她的错误
The end.
故事结束
OK. Um, I'm so sorry. But just so you guys know
我很遗憾 不过大伙们
you're all going to be in my wedding party.
你们都要参加我的婚礼宴会
Except for you, Charlotte.
除了你 夏洛特
I'm sorry. I just met you. Oh, you know, that's fine.
抱歉 我才刚认识你 没关系
I'll just uh, I'll come to the next one.
等你下次婚礼我再参加
Oh, hey, Bursk, Les, I'm assuming
伯斯科 莱丝 我在想
you guys want to be each other's plus ones
你们俩想以情侣身份来参加吗
since you're you know, smooch buddies.
因为你俩都搂搂抱抱了
No, no, stop. No cute winks.
别 别这样 别挤眉弄眼
Come on, you guys. We went on one date.
拜托 伙计们 我们才约过一次
I know how much you guys like to gossip about everything
我知道你们都喜欢八卦
but we don't want to talk about this at all.
但我们都还没谈过这件事
As far as you're concerned we're not even dating.
就你们所知 我们并没在约会
Okay, is that how you feel, Bursk?
你也是这么想的吗 伯斯科
I was instructed to feel that way.
我被命令也得这么想
This day is so perfect. I can't believe it.
今天太完美了 难以置信
I mean yeah, sometimes I do think about a different ring.
有时候我觉得应该换一枚戒指
Oh, because the diamond justin's got you is so tiny and ridiculous?
因为贾斯丁送你的钻石又小又滑稽吗
No, I love it.
不 我很喜欢
Oh, yeah. Me too! Oh my god, It's so perfect!
我也是 天啊 它太完美了
No. It's just because I kind of wish I had my grandmother's ring.
我只是有点希望能戴着祖母的戒指
What happened to it?
那枚戒指怎么了
It was My Ex-boyfriend Trent, he pawned it to buy protein powder.
我前男友特伦特把戒指当了去买♥♥蛋白粉
I loved my grandma.
我爱我的祖母
It's really all that I had left of her...
那是我留着她最后的遗物了
Oh, I know what this is. You're trying to manipulate me
我知道你想干什么 你想用可怜的表情
to try to go get that ring back by using your sad face.
控制我去帮你把戒指赎回来
But I'm sorry, sweetie. It's not gonna work on me.
不过抱歉 亲爱的 这招对我无效
I'm not buying it.
我不买♥♥账
No!
绝不
We're gonna get you that ring back!
我们去把你的戒指赎回来吧
Danny is such a jerk.
丹尼真是个混♥蛋♥
From now on nobody named Danny allowed in this bar.
从现在开始 这间酒吧不允许任何丹尼出现
My name is Danny.
我就叫丹尼
Oh. I'm sorry, man. I was talking about my room-mate.
对不起伙计 我刚说的是我的室友
But get the hell out of here Danny!
但你现在就给我滚出去 丹尼
You are a terrible friend. Here you go,
你是个糟糕的朋友 快滚
finish off your bear, you drunk!
喝完你的酒吧 死酒鬼
You are on motorcycle for one season and way to go.
你在摩托车上待了一整季 真棒
What's wrong with him? Oh, Danny was so mean to him this morning.
他怎么了 丹尼今天早上对他太刻薄了
I can still totally picture it.
我到现在还历历在目
So it all started when Justin, he woke up.
事情是从贾斯丁起床开始的
He was in a great mood. He was like,
他本来心情特别好 就像
man, I love being in love, man.
"伙计 我爱死深陷爱河的感觉了"
I just love it. Makes me wanna do the moonwalk.
我太喜欢这样了 让我想跳太空步
I could do the moonwalk.
我会跳太空步
I could get jiggy with it. I could... I could spin.
我太开心了 我会旋转
I could jump. I could dance for days and days but I'm not.
我会跳跃 我可以跳舞不停歇但我不会的
I'm just gonna stand completely still. Completely still.
我打算静静地呆着 一动不动
Still like a stone. Like a stone.
坚如磐石 如磐石
And then... and then Danny,
然后看看丹尼
We pan over to Danny and
把镜头转向丹尼
Danny was all like grrr. I think love is stupid.
丹尼一脸无语 我觉得爱情是愚蠢的
Getting married. Getting married, "Pfft". That's all like a dumb mistake.
结婚 结婚 就是个愚蠢的错误
I would never do that. And I get to be mean to you for just no reason
我永远不会结婚 我可以无缘无故对你刻薄
because I'm a big baby. I'm a big baby.
因为我是个老小孩儿 我是老小孩儿
My hair's too long to be a baby
我的头发对小孩儿来说太长了
but I act like a baby anyways.
但我就是要当小孩儿
You know babies go waa, waa, waa.
小孩子就是要哭哭哭
Look at me. I think I'm so cool even though I'm just a big jerk.
看着我 即使我是大混♥蛋♥但我依然很酷
Yeah. And you know what that big jerk did. That big jerk,
你们猜猜大混♥蛋♥做了什么 那混♥蛋♥
he went over and he slapped Justin in the face.
他走过去扇了贾斯丁一嘴巴
You know what Justin did? Justin spit on him.
贾斯丁做了什么呢 贾斯丁朝他吐口水
And Danny, he was so mean,
丹尼非常刻薄
he was like "Hey Justin. You give me your sweater"
说"贾斯丁 把你的卫衣给我"
You, you give me your sweater and...
快把你的卫衣给我
and I'm gonna do a high kick.
然后我要高踢腿
I'm gonna do another high kick. High kick, high kick, high kick
再来一个高踢腿 高踢腿 高踢腿
And that was it.
就是这样
Yeah. Maybe I embellished a little bit
也许我有点夸张了
but I feel like you guys got the gist.
不过我想你们应该都大致了解了
Unbelievable. Move. Unbelievable.
难以置信 让开 简直难以置信
Why is Danny being so mean?
为什么丹尼这么刻薄
Why can't you see what's going on?
你看不出来发生的事吗
Don't you remember the first time you met?
你不记得你们初次见面的情景了吗
Of course I do. It was right there in that office.
当然记得 就是在那间办公室
Oh, I remember it like it was yesterday.
我也清晰地记得仿佛昨♥日♥重♥现♥
**That's all I really want*
*这就是我真正想要的一切
**Some fun uh-uh-un*
*寻欢作乐
**Don't you love me baby*
*你不爱我吗 宝贝
**Oh, girls*
*女生
**They want to have fu-un*
*她们想寻欢作乐
**Oh girls they wanna*
*女生想
Justin? I didn't hear you come in.
贾斯丁 我没听到你进来
Yes. You must be Danny. Killer pipes, man.
你一定就是丹尼 你唱得真好
Thank you. Yes. I went
谢谢 我小时候
through a choral camp every summer as a kid
每个夏天都参加了合唱营
and I was the first male Annie.
我是第一个男安妮
We are a real odd couple, you and me.
你我真是奇怪的一对
I bet that we're just gonna end up arguing and apologizing to each other
我赌我们会以每周不断地
over and over again every week.
吵架然后相互道歉而收场
In my flashbacks, I let the boys speak for themselves.