把妹大作战（2014）

Stop it!
别闹了
But, Charlotte, you need to connect with her on a deeper level.
但是你和夏洛特需要更深层次的联♥系♥
You know, with Candace,
和坎迪斯在一起的时候
sometimes before we make love,
有时候在爱爱之前
I make love with her before I even take our clothes off.
我衣服还没脱 就爱抚了她
Here, I'll show you. You be Candace.
来 我演示给你看 你来当坎迪斯
Yeah, I don't... I don't want to be Candace.
这个 我 我不想当坎迪斯
Okay, Candace. Now look into my eyes.
没事的 坎迪斯 看着我的眼睛
Look how much I care about you.
看我有爱你有多深
How much I need you.
我有多需要你
What the hell was that?
刚才你是怎么回事
I believe that was an emotional orgasm.
我想这是一个情感上的高♥潮♥
Okay. Well, I'm gonna go light myself on fire....
好吧 我要引火自焚
Look, Danny, I've never made love either.
听着 丹尼 我也从来没和人做过爱
Okay? But you've got this chance with Charlotte,
但你好不容易和夏洛特有了机会
so don't blow it.
别搞砸了
Even if I wanted to be int-i-macy,
即使我有心要和一个人变得"亲咪"
I wouldn't even know where to start.
我也不知道该从何下手
Just start slow. Next time you're watching TV, try cuddling.
慢慢来 下次可以试试拥抱着一起看电视
Just pretend you're a koala hugging a tree.
把自己当成抱树的考拉
All right. Got it. Hug her like a koala.
懂了 像考拉一样抱住她
I hate cuddling.
我真讨厌搂搂抱抱
Are you kidding me? I live for cuddling.
开什么玩笑 我就是为拥抱而生的
Cuddling is the best part. Seriously?
拥抱是最好的部分 你真心的
No. I'm just trying to make a point.
不 只是想强调一下
The best part is making that ass clap.
最好的部分当然是激♥情♥时分肢体的碰撞
I guess I just have to accept that
我猜我不得不接受
I'm never gonna be sexy.
我永远性感不起来这个事实了
I really wish Shelly was here to give me a hug right now.
我真希望现在能有谢利给我一个拥抱
You never know. He could be back there.
谁知道呢 他可能就在后头躲着呢
Hey, Shelly, watch! Pofessional wrestlers and marijuana out here.
谢利快看 这儿有很多职业摔跤手和大♥麻♥哦
No, not here.
不 他不在
Candace, we can totally help you be sexy.
坎迪斯 我们绝对可以帮你变性感
Okay? Like the way that Danny likes me to be sexy is
比方说丹尼喜欢的我的性感是指
I'll laugh at his jokes or wear a cute shirt,
我会被他逗笑 穿一件好看的衣服
or I'll show him close-ups of my junk.
或者让他近距离大饱眼福
Nudies? Yes.
高清无♥码♥ 没错
Why haven't I thought about that before?
为什么我之前都没想到呢
Oh, wait, because I don't hate myself.
等等 那是因为我不讨厌我自己
Do you have any special talents?
你有什么特别的长处吗
For example, I'm very good at acronyms.
比如 我特别擅长缩句
It's when you take the first letter of every word in a sentence.
我可以说出一句话里每个词的首字母
I can do that fast.
而且速度很快
I'm sure some women find that sexy.
我相信一定有女人觉得这很性感
What the hell are you talking about?
你到底在说什么
W-T-H-A-Y-T-A.
W-T-H-A-Y-T-A
I'm sorry. No one on earth finds that sexy.
抱歉 没人会觉得这很性感
I-S-N-O--O-E-F... that sexy.
I-S-N-O-O-E-F...那么性感
Okay. Let's see if you exenterate your pose. Okey?
我们再试试这个动作如何
Arch your back.
弓起你的背
Squeeze your boobs together with your arms.
用手臂轻轻挤你的胸部
Then sit like you're sitting on a bar stool
感觉自己像是坐在一把略高的
that's just a little bit too high.
酒吧高脚凳上
And then pout like a sexy duck.
像性感的鸭子那样噘嘴
Do you have any suggestions?
你有什么建议吗
Candace, it should make you feel sexy
坎迪斯 有一个好男人疯狂地爱着你
that a great guy is crazy about you.
你应该觉得很性感
That's how it always makes me feel,
我一直都是这么觉得的
and no I don't wanna talk about it right now.
顺便我还没准备好谈这件事
A-N-I-D-W-T-A-I-R-N... Come on, you know...?
A-N-I-D-W-T-A-I-R-N...拜托
Just be confident and do something unexpected, okay?
自信一点 做些他想象不到的事
Say "surprise" and grab him, and kiss him really hard.
吓他一跳 拉住他 用力地吻下去
I don't know if I could do that.
我不知道自己是否做得到
You can. Here, Les, demonstrate on me.
你做得到的 莱丝 用我做个示范
Oh my god. Is this really going to happen?
天啊 这是真的吗
The ratings are going to go through the roof.
性感指数一定会高到爆表
Surprise.
惊喜来啦
I'm going to need a little more wine before we do this.
在做这件事前 我要喝点葡萄酒
Somebody need my juice?
有人要喝酒吗
Eh, do you like that so much?
你喜欢吗
I mean it's not my favorite thing but...
倒不是我最喜欢的 但...
Come on, I'm being int-i-macy.
拜托 我是想和你更"亲咪"
I'm hugging you like a koala bear.
我在像考拉抱树一样抱着你
Okay. If you want to be intimate, I am so in. Hold me.
如果你想我们更亲密 我完全同意 抱我
Yeah, you know what? This is not for me.
知道吗 这不适合我
Okay? What is it about girls
姑娘们到底怎么回事
that they just want to change who you are, you know?
一个个都想改变你
They'll be like, oh,
她们总是会说
are you really good at spontaneous wild sex? You are?
你真的擅长冲动狂野的性♥爱♥吗 你说你是
Well, you know what, stop being like that
知道吗 别再这样了
and instead be a stupid koala bear.
乖乖做你的蠢考拉
I'm sorry. I don't think this int-i-macy thing is for me.
抱歉 我觉得"亲咪"不适合我
People can't change.
本性难移
People totally change for each other all the time.
人们总是会为了别人而改变
Look, Candace is out being sexy for Justin right now,
听着 坎迪斯现在在为了贾斯丁而性感
and I'm sure it's going great.
我相信这一切一定顺利极了
Here's your coffee.
你的咖啡
Why are you looking at me weird? Surprise!
你为什么用这种眼光看着我 惊喜来啦
Oh! Are you okay? Are you okay?
你还好吗 你还好吗
You knocked out my toof.
你敲掉了我的"牙次"
What? I was trying to be sexy.
什么 我只是想变得性感一点
I'm so mad that there's nothing else I can spoil anymore.
我好生气 没东西可以给我剧透了
Thank God.
谢天谢地
You know what? At the end of "Making a Murderer,"
知道吗 在《制♥造♥谋杀》的结尾
Steve Avery is guilty!
判了史蒂芬·艾弗瑞有罪
You telling me they put a white man in jail?
你是说他们把白人抓进监狱里了
Now, that is a twist.
这还真是神转折
I can't believe I knocked out your tooth.
我不敢相信我敲掉了你的牙齿
Candathe, ith okay. It doesn't even hurt. It's a cap.
坎迪湿 没四 不疼 只是个牙冠罢了
I'm so embarrassed.
我真尴尬
Oh, my God. Don't be Candathe.
不可能 不要紧的 坎迪湿
No, don't call me Candace. Call me something else.
别叫我坎迪斯 叫我别的
Thweetie.
亲耐的
Excuse me, seriously?
等等 你在干嘛
Are you laughing? Because this is all your fault.
你还幸灾乐祸 明明都是你的错
I should have known not to take sexy advice from the old maid.
我就知道不应该听老处♥女♥的建议学怎么变性感
I will eat your ass for breakfast!
我要把你撕了喂狗
That came out wrong.
抱歉 不该这么说的
You know what, you got me so mad.
知道吗 你害得我好生气
You tricked me into being int-I-macy.
你诓我去和别人变得"亲咪"
Dude, now I'm all insecure and nervous, and I can't handle it.
现在我各种紧张不安 我不知道如何是好
See? That's how I feel all the time.
这就是我一直以来的感受
That's intimacy.
这就四亲密感
Okay. If you say one more word, this is going in your face.
你再说一个字 我就把这杯东西泼你脸上
Okay. See that passion?
你的这种激岑
You feel that?
你感觉到了吗
If we were to have sex right now for the firth time,
如果我们现在第一次做
you'd be making love.
你就是爱抚我了
Okay.
好吧
That's for calling me old.
叫你说我老
This is for showing me pictures of your woo-woo!
让你给我看你的小妹妹
And this is ruining "Making a Murderer"!
叫你剧透《制♥造♥谋杀》
Drink fight!
泼饮料大战
W-s-a-b-a-o-o.
W-s-a-b-a-o-o
We should all be ashamed of ourselves.
我是指我们都应该为自己感到羞愧
He's right.
他说得对
Guys,I... Okay. This is my fault.
我...我承认 是我的错
I got upset, and I freaked out. Charlotte.
我不开心 一下爆发了 夏洛特
I'm really sorry that I said those things to you.
我很抱歉 和你说了那些话
Your woo-woo is beautiful.
你的小妹妹美极了