前夫总动员（2011）

The Exes S04E05

Part 2 March 18, 2021, 1:49 p.m.

Well, if he did, it's too late.
罗伯偷了我的钱后我花了好几年
After Rob stole my money, it took me years
才恢复了元气
to dig myself out of that hole.
这就是我保龄球事业起步那么晚
It's the reason why I had such a late start in my bowling career.
为什么我没成为像
Why I never became a household name
开朗的长腿简森那么家喻户晓的原因
like Sunny "long-legs" Jensen.
- 谁? - 很有意思
- Who? - Very funny.
该死的他来这儿干吗?
What the hell is he doing here?
是你设的套对吧?
You set me up, didn't you?
哈斯凯尔听我说
Haskell, listen to me.
尼基和我很多年没说过话
Nicki and I didn't speak for years,
而现在我无法想象没有她的生活
and now I can't imagine my life without her.
你至少听他解释一下啊
You owe it to yourself to at least hear him out.
- 嗨哈斯凯尔 - 嗯哼
- Hi, Haskell. - Uh-huh.
进展不错
I like where this is going.
听我说哈斯凯尔...
Listen, Haskell...
别白费口舌了
Save your breath.
你说什么也改变不了任何事情
There's nothing you can say that can change anything.
我是个差劲的兄弟我偷了你的东西
I'm a terrible brother. I stole from you.
我对你撒谎我背叛了你
I lied to you. I betrayed you.
我是个自私的自以为是的混球
I am a selfish, narcissistic ass.
我听着呢
I'm listening.
我想说我有很好的借口
I'd love to say that I had a good excuse,
但事实只是我等不下去了
but the truth is I just couldn't wait.
我必须离开那个小镇
I had to get out of that town,
我快死在那儿了
I was dying there.
所以我拿了钱离开了
So I took the money and I split
这是我一生犯的最大的错误
and it was the biggest mistake of my life.
当然是
It sure was!
还记得这个吗?
Do you remember this?
哦...我们的旧名片
Oh... Our old business card.
我一直带着它
I've always carried it.
我猜你早就把它们扔了吧
I bet you threw all yours out years ago.
噢并没有...
Well, not, uh...
全部扔掉
All of them.
吕策兄弟我们搬运一切
The Lutz Brothers: We'll move anything.
对货物绝不过问
No questions asked.
对我们搬了好多东西
Yeah, we moved many
比如那条重的出奇的地毯
a suspiciously heavy rug.
也许我们该问一些问题
Maybe we should have asked a couple questions.
我们当年真是年少无知
We were young and stupid.
是的我们曾经是
Yeah, we were.
我想让我兄弟回来
I want my brother back.
我也是
Me too.
听着哈斯凯尔我现在过得还不错
Look, Haskell, I've done pretty well.
所以如果你有什么需要尽管跟我提
So if there's anything you need, you just name it.
你有需要也可以跟我提
The same goes for you.
噢既然你真么说了
Well, since you bring it up,
我需要一个肾脏
I kind of need a kidney.
- 文件看的怎么样了梵尼萨? - 恩?
- How you doing, Vanessa? - Huh?
我是说我们休息会
Tell you what. Let's take a break.
现在你有什么疑问吗?
You have any questions so far?
呃我想想你结婚了吗?
Uh... Let's see. Are you married?
噢私人问题哈好吧...
Oh. A personal question. Ha ha, well...
实际上我的婚礼将在
Actually, my wedding's
中♥央♥公园的湖边别♥墅♥举♥行♥
at the lake house in central Park
- 三个月之后 - 噢那太酷了！
- in three months. - Oh! That's so cool!
- 恭喜你! - 谢谢
- Congratulations. - Thank you.
那么你未婚夫是个什么样的人?
So what's your fiance like?
我不知道我还没见过他
I don't know, I haven't met him yet.
霍利贝丝·哈德森从一号♥线打进来了
Holly, Beth Hudson's on line one.
噢好的！现在你将看到法律不仅是
Oh, good! Now you'll see that the law's more than
读文件现在当我跟我的客户交谈时
just about reading. Now, when I talk to my clients,
我不仅仅是一个律师我还是个治疗师
I'm more than just a lawyer. I'm a therapist,
一个朋友一个值得信赖又可爱的密友
a friend, a trusted and loved confidante.
你好贝丝
Hello, Beth.
给我听着你这个吸血鬼律师
Now, listen, you blood-sucking shyster.
如果你不能给我弄到阿斯斑的公♥寓♥
You get me the condo in Aspen or I'll hire
我就去雇用其他的律师
another leech who will!
你知道吗也许我该私下接这个电♥话♥
You know, perhaps I should take this in private.
要不你出去跟伊顿待会儿? 恩?
Why don't you go outside with Eden? Hm?
好吧那个女人听上去真愤怒
Okay. That woman sounds so angry.
噢这只是客户和律师之间的玩笑
Oh, it's just attorney-client banter.
这是我生活的一部分
I live for it.
霍利说我该在这待会儿
So Holly said I should hang out here.
- 好的坐吧 - 恩
- Great. Pull up a seat. - Okay.
那么一个助理的工作是什么?
So what's an assistant do?
噢什么都做
Oh, you name it.
我安排她的日程记录计费时间
I handle her schedule, keep track of billable hours,
整理她的文件回复邮件
organize her files, answer emails.
我基本上是这个组织的神经中枢
I'm basically the nerve center of this organization.
那你现在在做什么?
So what are you working on?
我在购物
I'm shopping.
神经中枢需要为晚上的约会注入活力
The nerve center needs new pumps for her date tonight.
真的?我还以为你们整天都在工作呢
Really? I got the impression you guys worked all the time.
噢我可不会！
Oh, not me!
我工作的魅力就在于
The beauty of my job
我不用把我的工作带回家做
is I don't have to take my work home with me.
除了是那个具有杀手气质的新合伙人
Unless it's that new associate with the killer bod.
噢！
Oh!
噢这真是个收获颇丰的客户会谈
Well, that was a fruitful and rewarding client conference.
那么我们可以继续了吗?
So shall we dive back in?
噢如果你不介意的话
Well, if you don't mind,
我想在伊顿这儿再待会儿
I thought I'd stay and hang out with Eden for a little while.
好的没问题
Okay. No problem.
那么当你准备好了就进来我们继续
Well, when you're ready, come back in and we'll have more fun
探讨法律的乐趣
with the law!
这里是霍利·富兰克林办公室
Holly Franklin's office.
又是贝丝
It's Beth again.
这次那个贱♥人♥又想要什么?
What's that bitch want now?
噢他来了那么哈斯凯尔
Oh, there he is now.
一切顺利吗?
So, Haskell, how was it?
非常棒我们聊了几小时
It was amazing. We talked for hours.
好像我们从未分开似的
It was like we were never apart.
事实上罗伯在广场那边有套房♥子
In fact, Rob has a suite at the Plaza
他想让我搬过去住这样我们就和从前一样了
and he wants me to stay with him, so it'll be like old times.
噢我有点激动
Aw, I just got a tingle.
噢他还问我要一个肾脏
Oh, and he asked me for a kidney.
- 什么? - 而且我准备给他一个
- What? - And I'm gonna give it to him.
你还激动吗?
How's your tingle now?
有消息了吗?
Any word yet?
没他还是不接电♥话♥
No. He's still not picking up.
我不敢相信打算把一个肾脏
I can't believe he's just gonna hand over a kidney
给他那个故意失踪的狡猾兄弟
to that conniving weasel of a brother.
我们能做什么? 他是个成年人
What can we do? He's a grown man.
能够自己做决定
He can make this decision on his own.
不他不能他是哈斯凯尔
No, he can't. He's Haskell.
你知道他怎么做决定的 "抛个硬币
You know how he makes decisions. "Eeny-meeny-miney-mo,
正面付税反面欠税"
pay my taxes, yes or no."
- 来吧我们走 - 去哪?
- Come on, let's go. - Where we going?
去酒店跟他讲讲道理
To the hotel to talk some sense into him.
好吧如果我们当时听了我祖父的话
All right, but none of this would have happened
所有这些就不会发生了
if we would have just listened to my granddaddy.
他总是告诉我...
He always told me...
我厌倦了你祖父和他
I'm tired of your grandpa
那套朴素的智慧
and his homespun wisdom.
朴素?
Homespun?
大颈区纽约市长岛附近的一个富人区
这个男人可是在大颈区卖♥♥过捷豹的
The man sold jaguars in great neck.
- 我知道！- 噢我的天
- I know! - Oh, my god.
嗨什么这么好笑?
Hi. What's so funny?