外星也难民

小瓢虫 我们在干什么呢
Lady B, what are we doing?
在公园里我们不需要用牵引绳
We don't need a leash in the park.
我给你取了
Oh. Here.
小傻瓜
You silly.
这些是素食肉吗[不可能]
Is any of this Impossible meat?
我现在只吃素食肉
I only eat Impossible Foods now.
-不 这些食物全都可能 -真恶心
- No, all this food is extremely possible. - Gross.
我们把这瓶普罗赛克酒
Oh, hey, we're just gonna donate this bottle of prosecco
还有霹雳舞板捐给好市多超♥市♥ 好吗
and breakdancing board to... to Costco, okay?
就这些
That's all.
我闻到了晚宴的味道
I smell a dinner party.
我们行动
Let's ride.
现在行动
Now!
晚宴警♥察♥ 放下你的奶酪刀
Dinner Party Police! Drop your cheese knives.
有什么问题吗 警官
Is there a problem, officers?
这里没办晚宴
There's no dinner parties happening here.
这家运动酒吧只卖♥♥酒 偶尔买♥♥类鸦♥片♥
This sports bar is just selling alcohol with the occasional opioid.
抱歉
Uh, sorry.
情报有误
Bad intel.
我们安全了
We're clear.
倒立 轻弹 一圈又一圈
Handstand. Flip. Round and round.
然后这样 侧滑 再这样
And doing it... Slide... And doing it.
在居民宅里开运动酒吧
A whole sports bar in a residential house?
他们不可能拿到许可证的
They can never get a permit for that.
我们被高科技骗了 高科技是我们的专长
We've been duped by sci-fi. And sci-fi is our area.
特里的专长是了解各地区所有的家庭主妇
Terry's area is knowing all the housewives of various regions.
是时候使用过度武力了
Time to use excessive force?
不 我们只能用高科技打败高科技
No. We're just gonna have to fight sci-fi with sci-fi.
那就是使用过度武力
That uses excessive force!
别再这么说了
Stop saying that!
给你个警徽你就觉得自己是正义化身了
Wow! Give a man a badge and it really goes right to his head.
这俩电子先知能在电子邀请函发出前
These E-cogs can sense when an E-vite is going out
就探测到它
before it's even sent.
他们的大脑连着互联网
Their brains are attached to the internet,
我还用了亚马逊的算法用来预测
and I used the same algorithm Amazon uses
你什么时候会购买♥♥东西
to know when you're gonna purchase something.
侦测到晚宴
Dinner party detected.
发现得太早了 主人还在纠结
It's in such an early stage that the host is still deciding
用什么可爱的背景图
between cute background images.
跳舞的热狗
Dancing hot dogs?
据我所知 这他妈就是个晚宴
That's dinner party bullshit, if I've ever heard it.
我们能在里面装猎枪子弹吗
Oh, oh, can we put shotgun shells in these?
我说了不行 拿枪只是为了戏剧性效果
I said no! They're just for dramatic effect,
但是刚被你毁了 我们只能再来一次
which you just ruined, so we have to do it again.
可恶
Goddammit!
这些邀请函是用来干嘛的
What the hell are those invitations for?
我哪知道 老兄 问问你的电子先知吧
I don't know, man. Why don't you ask your E-cogs?
还是说他们只能探测到电子邀请函
Or do they only work on E-vites?
我一直对你比较宽容 因为我是你的领导
I've been going easy on you because I'm your mission leader.
别逼我收拾你
Don't make me come down on you.
那你加油咯 警官
Do your worst... Officer.
准许使用过度武力
Permission to use excessive force!
终于
Oh, finally.
那是啥
What the is that?
不好意思 嗓子里有个消音虫
Sorry, Bleep Bug in my throat.
我用高科技有机材料培育了两只纳帕犬
I grew these Napadoodles using techno-organic material.
它们能从数英里外
They can sense cheese plates
就闻到芝士和反♥人♥类♥牌游戏的气味
and Cards Against Humanity from miles away.
而且 他们有超过敏性基因
Plus, they're hypoallergenic.
是你逼我的
You've forced my hand.
释放你的邪恶之作
Release your unholy creations.
你们想出去遛吗 出去遛遛不
You wanna go for a walk, yeah? You want walkies?
乖孩子 乖孩子
Good girls, good girls.
苹果酱芝士杯
Brie cups with apple butter?
是布鲁克林产的食材吗
Are these from Brooklyn?
我们把人变成红酒
We're turning people into wine?
我觉得这有点过头了
I-I-I think we've gone too far.
没错 这就是过度武力
Exactly. It's excessive force.
他们爱红酒 看他们在酒瓶上多开心
These people love wine. Look how happy they are on the labels.
-有新的电子邀请函 -等等
- A new E-vite. - Wait!
不 特里和杰茜回了邮件说可能参加
Oh, no, Terry and Jesse just replied as maybes on this.
电子邀请函
可能参加
可能参加
我们不能把他们变红酒 他们是自己人
W-we can't let them get bottled. They're our crew.
雅姆莱克 我命令你撤回纳帕犬
Yumyulack, I-I-I order you to call off the doodles.
我没法撤回它们
I can't call them off.
一旦纳帕犬闻到派对的味儿 那就结束了
Once a Napadoodle senses party prep, it's over.
我的老天
My gray god!
谢谢你能来 浩克 我们需要你的帮助
Thanks for coming, Halk. We really need your help.
这种事已经很久没发生过了
These kind of things don't happen in here anymore.
大战以后就没有过了
Not since... the war.
史蒂文
Oh, Steve.
我不确定我能帮上忙
I'm not sure I can help.
我不太了解他 他在农牧层工作
I didn't know him that well. He worked on the farming level.
我们需要你的专业知识
We need your expertise.
只有你才有能力
You're the only one qualified enough
协助我们调查谋杀案
to help us with a murder investigation.
拜托 你是战斗英雄 你吃得消这种事
Come on, you're a war hero. You've got the stomach for this.
而且你曾是《识骨寻踪》的执行编审
Plus, you were an Executive Story Editor on Bones.
顺便一问 那是啥
What is that, by the way?
执行编审 就是个编剧的等级
An ESE? It's just a level of writer.
那部剧会用我纯粹是
Look, I only got hired on that show
因为我写了一集《法律与秩序》的脚本
because I wrote a Law and Order spec,
不是因为我真的是个侦探
not because I'm an actual detective.
你在借鉴真实的犯罪报道的时候
I-I'm sure you picked things up
总归学到了点东西吧
when you ripped stories from the headlines.
我们推测 一只蟋蟀进到了墙国
We have a theory. Big ol' cricket got into the Wall
然后杀死了可怜的史蒂文
and killed poor Steve.
你们觉得这是一只蟋蟀干的
You think a cricket did this?
那些混♥蛋♥抖抖腿就能创作音乐
Those bastards make music with their legs.
谁知道它们还会干什么
Who knows what else they're capable of.
如果你们觉得是蟋蟀干的 那还要我来干嘛
If you think it's a cricket, why do you need me?
因为蒂姆指名要你
Because Tim asked for you specifically.
你是个战斗英雄
You're a war hero.
你来宣布这样的事 听起来会好一些
The announcement will sound better coming from you.
抱歉了 伙计们
I'm sorry, guys,
我也有自己的生活
but I have a life of my own.
祝你们顺利找到蟋蟀
Good luck finding that cricket.
-喂 -特里 听我说
- Yello! - Terry, listen to me!
雅姆莱克培育出一种把罪犯变红酒的纳帕犬
Yumyulack created huge Napadoodles that turn criminals into wine.
不要去参加那个晚宴
Do not go into that dinner party.
犯法的事我想--都不敢想
Oh, I would never dreeeeeam of breaking the law.
你完全可以录下这段对话
And you can totally record this conversation.
不 特里 这不是钓鱼执法 该死
No, T-Terry, this is not a trick. Oh, damn it!
大伙儿 猜猜看
You guys! Guess what?
我把这房♥子伪装成一家睿侠电器店的样子
I sci-fi disguised this house to look like a Radio Shack
这样就没人会进来了
so no one will ever go in it.
快跑
Run!
我没关车载电台
I left NPR on in the truck.
它们一定是被吸引过去了
Th-th-they must have been drawn to it.
我口袋里还有迷你胡萝卜
And I have baby carrots in my pocket.
你♥他♥妈♥在干嘛 扔掉它们
What the shit are you doing? Get rid of them.
拖不了它们多久了
That's not gonna hold them long.
快 拿辆用鸟做的滑板车
Quick, grab the scooter made from birds.
人类的电池真太差了
Ugh, human battery power is so weak.
他们怎么还没发现如何利用爱的力量
Why haven't they discovered how to harness the power of love yet?
不是吧 全食食品店
No. Hole Foods?
这里就像个巨型晚宴
This is like a mega dinner party.
我们周围的人全在试吃有机食品
We're surrounded by people eating organic samples
并向彼此推荐着播客
and recommending podcasts to each other.
你听过慢烧电台吗