公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation S07E06
Part 3
Feb. 20, 2024, 1:47 p.m.
放猎犬 - 什么猎犬啊
Release the hounds! - What hounds?
"猎犬"是我开♥发♥的一款被药监局拒绝发♥售♥的古龙水
"The Hounds" as in FDA-rejected cologne I've been working on
让所有东西闻起来像湿狗
that makes everything smell like wet dog.
大洒一场
Make it rain!
哦 我得去杀了我爹了 我们走
Ooh. I gotta go kill my dad. Let's go.
抱歉了 JJ 我给了你虚假的希望
I'm sorry, JJ, that I gave you false hope.
这事没希望了 就跟我的蠢公园一样
This is a lost cause, just like my stupid park.
去他的 肯定有其他办法的
Screw that. There's gotta be another way.
如果我们偷走Feinstein大楼的钥匙
What if we steal the keys to Feinstein's building,
破门而入 然后在他办公室里扔卫生纸呢
break in, and TP his office?
整个事情拍下来 我们绝对能上恶作剧节目的
Film the whole thing. We'd definitely get on a prank show.
好吧 我爱你的能量 Andy
Okay, I love your energy, Andy,
但这对把JJ留在这里是没有帮助的
but it's not gonna help us keep JJ's where it is.
它必须要呆在这里吗
Does it have to stay where it is?
Andy和我住的位置有 就 一大堆建筑
There's like, a ton of buildings near where Andy and I live,
他们全都超级便宜 因为他们又空旷又恶心
and they're all super cheap because they're empty and disgusting.
太好了 我加入 只要能远离这种古龙水味道就行
Great. I'm in. Anything to get away from this cologne smell.
哦 冲水更糟糕了 冲水更糟糕了
Ooh, water makes it worse. Water makes it worse.
这是洛杉矶最热门的餐厅
This is the hottest restaurant in L.A.
所有寿司的肉都来自于名人养过的鱼
All the sushi is made from fish previously owned by celebrities.
好的
Okay.
这是查理兹·塞隆的黄条鰤
This is Charlize Theron's yellowtail.
这里是演员保罗·雷瑟的三文鱼
Here we have Paul Reiser's salmon.
还有导演Peter Bogdanovich的盐水鳗鱼
And Peter Bogdanovich's saltwater eel.
请享用
Enjoy.
嗯 Bogdano美味啊
Mmm, Bogdano-delish.
天啊 你真是陷进去了啊
Man, you got it bad.
我知道你是在每五分钟检查手♥机♥
I know you're checking your phone every five minutes
看看Lucy愿不愿意跟你来我婚礼
to see if Lucy will come with you to my wedding.
对不起 - 嘿 我理解的
I'm sorry. - Hey, I understand.
所以我才给你准备了点东西
Which is why I got you something.
嘿 你不该给我准备什么的 今天是你特别的日子啊
Hey, you're not supposed to get me anything. This is your special day.
我没给你买♥♥啥啊
I didn't buy you anything.
我要给你的是一条建议
What I have for you is a piece of advice.
嗷 该死 我偷偷指望你给我搞到了Jaden Smith的那双鞋子呢
Aw, damn. I was secretly hoping you got me the shoes Jaden Smith wears
演员 Will Smith的儿子
《全民情敌2: 敌子养的》里那双
in Hitch 2: Son of a Hitch.
《全民情敌》由Will Smith主演
我给你的建议是 如果你想和Lucy一起
My advice to you is, if you want to be Lucy,
你应该对她更坦率一点
you have to be upfront with her about it.
做个男人 约她出来 - 她为我工作啊
Be a man and ask her out. - She works for me.
她为了这份工作背井离乡来到Pawnee啊
She uprooted her whole life to move to Pawnee for this job.
我不想把这事搞奇怪了 而且如果她说不呢
I don't want to make it weird. And what if she says no?
如果只有我有感觉呢
What if I'm the only one that caught feelings?
你不问就不会知道
You won't know until you ask.
基本上 Tommy 碰到心灵的问题的时候 我想说
Basically, Tommy, when it comes to matters of the heart, I say:
款待自己
Treat yo' self.
谢了 Donna 真是个好礼物
Thanks, Donna. That's a great gift.
我差点忘了
I almost forgot.
我确实给你搞到了《全民情敌2》里的鞋子
I did get you them shoes from Hitch 2!
哦 靠 那个礼物就更棒了
Oh, snap. That's an even better gift.
还没完了
That's not all.
看看你背后 但别太明显
Look behind you, but don't be obvious.
我能来点"我"软壳蟹吗
Can I get the "me" soft-shell crab?
Josh Groban
Josh Groban!
他在吃自己养的寿司啊
He's eating his own sushi!
那是我见过最浪的事情了
That's the most baller thing I've ever seen.
欢迎来到海滩景色平台
Welcome to Beachview Terrace,
悲哀的 无法挽救的 破败的Pawnee腋窝
the sad, unsalvageable, broken-down armpit of Pawnee.
是啊 我们试着清理这片区域好多次了
Yeah, we tried to clean up this neighborhood so many times.
啥都不管用 我们几个月前送了辆大街清扫车来
Nothing's worked. We sent a street cleaner through here a few months ago.
浣熊把轮子都啃掉了
Raccoons ate the wheels right off it.
Dexhart议员代表整个区域
Councilman Dexhart represents this district,
十年之前他当选的时候 他保证要清理干净的
and ten years ago when he was elected, he promised to clean it up.
然而 他就取了个花哨的新名字 海滩景色平台
Instead, he just gave it a fancy new name: Beachview Terrace.
这地方的梗准确的名字
A more accurate name for this place?
医疗废物屁汗树丛
Medical Waste Butt-Sweat Grove.
还 抱歉我来晚了
Hi, sorry I'm late.
这个地方在我们列表上七年了 没人想来看过
We've had this listing for seven years, and no one's ever asked to see it.
我还觉得是恶作剧电♥话♥呢 - 这个地方什么都有了
I thought this was a prank call. - This place has everything.
害虫 弹孔 黄蜂窝
Vermin, bullet holes, a hornets nest.
你们看 我非常感谢各位帮我做的这一切
Look, I appreciate everything that you guys have done for me,
但即使我花费时间和钱翻新这堆垃圾
but even if I put in the time and the money to refurbish this trash heap,
也不能改变镇上这部分没有体面人住着的事实
it's not gonna change the fact that no respectable people live in this part of town anymore.
完全是的啊 - 一切只能魔法般地变掉才行
Damn straight. - Everything would have to magically change.
整片街区必须要突然变得安全
The whole neighborhood would have to suddenly become safe
而且干净 还有生意 和出来吃饭的人
and clean and have businesses and people who dine out.
别啊 那我们就得再搬家了
No, then we'd have to move again.
你在想... - 有可能
Are you thinking... - It's possible.
我们怎么...
How would we...
公♥关♥ - 公♥关♥
PR. - PR.
那你就可以-- - 是的 没错 好的 很好
Which you could then-- - Yes, right. Okay, good.
伙计们 我们有大概五天时间做三个月的工作
Guys, we have about five days to do three months worth of work.
但如果我们搞定了 我们就能拯救JJ餐厅
But if we pull it off, we can rescue JJ's Diner,
我们能建成一座新的国家公园
we can establish a new National Park,
而且我们能永远拯救Pawnee 谁加入
and we can save Pawnee forever. Who's in?
我
I am.
哦天啊 你是从哪冒出来的
Oh, my God. Where'd you come from?
地板洞
The floor hole.
嘿 你的旅程如何
Hey, how was your trip?
很好 显然
Great, obviously.
闪亮了那个肘 这里的一切如何
Bedazzled that elbow. How's everything here?
无事发生
Uneventful.
所以 我在想那个去Donna婚礼的想法
So, I was thinking about the idea of going to Donna's wedding.
等等 在你说话之前
Wait. Before you say anything,
我不觉得你应该去Donna的婚礼指导餐饮 - 哦
I don't think you should go to Donna's wedding to supervise catering. - Oh.
我想让你作为我的约会对象去
I want you to come with me as my date.
哦 - 现在情况是 你为我工作
Oh. - The thing is, you work for me,
所以我即使问可能也有点不大好了
so it's probably kind of uncool for me to even ask.
所以我在这些文件上签了字
Which is why I signed these documents
将Tom小酒馆的日常工作交给了Craig
transferring day-to-day operations of Tom's Bistro over to Craig.
他现在是你的老板了 而不是我
He'll be your boss now. Not me.
是时候了
It's about time.
我们别再做蔓越莓沙拉了 立即生效
We're losing the cranberry salad, effective immediately.
你不必这么做的 - 是 我必须
You don't have to do this. - Yeah, I do.
你的工作很棒 我想让你永远在这里
You're great at your job, and I want you working here forever,
而如果你对我没有感觉
and if you don't have feelings for me,
我想让你知道一切都会没事的
I need you to know that everything is gonna be fine.
实际上 算了吧
In fact, forget it.
我甚至不是认真的 你被恶作剧了
I wasn't even serious. You've been hoaxed.
你被Tommy了 - 就 等等
You've been Tommy'ed. - Just, hold on.
我是想说我不想以朋友的身份跟你去
I was gonna say that I wouldn't want to go with you as friends.
我想以对象的身份跟你去
I want to go with you as your date.
哦 酷
Oh. Cool.
Craig 没关系了
Craig, never mind.
我们可以把这些纸撕碎了
We can rip these papers up.
嗯 我希望我的统治能更持久一点
Well, I wish my reign had lasted longer,
但我对我做的决定和我开除的人都很开心
but I'm happy with the decisions I made and the people I fired.
哦天 我最好过去看看
Oh, God. I better get back there.
5天后
伙计们 我不知道这是为了啥
You guys, I don't know what this is about,
但现在已经4:13了 你们还有七分钟
but it's 4:13, so you got seven minutes.
嗯 我们就想给你们介绍新的Gryzzl园区选址
Well, we just wanted to introduce you to the new home of the Gryzzl campus.
你们是嗑药了吗
Are you tripping?
我们刚刚花了1.25个亿
We just spent $125 million
在南印第安纳山麓建造新园区啊
to build our new campus in the Southern Indiana Foothills.
而你们还得再花一个亿 至少
And you'll be spending another 100 million, at least,
用在大楼 道路 管道 电气
to construct the building, roads, plumbing, electrical.
而在海滩景色平台
Whereas here at Beachview Terrace,
你们能接手整整五块方形的Pawnee历史街区
you can take over five entire square blocks of historic Pawnee.
这是Gryzzl地区公♥司♥总部的完整计划
Here's a complete proposal for Gryzzl's new regional corporate headquarters.
这是纸张吗
公园与游憩（2009）
Parks and Recreation
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