成功镇凶案（2015）

You know where I was? No bloody idea. Haven't a clue. Yeah?
无敌了
That's unbeatable!
不过我喜欢你俩
I like you two, though.
女士们先生们 我们今天迎来了几个好家伙
Yeah? Ladies and gentlemen, we have some good eggs with us today.
一些真正的派对动物 我喜欢这些家伙
Some real party animals. I like these guys.
是我的菜 放马过来吧 你们的提案是什么
These are my type of guys. Hit me! What's your proposal, yeah?
不过我警告你们 我对小打小闹不感兴趣
But I warn you, I'm not interested in playing with small fry.
这将是你圣诞节之前听到的最大的计划
Well, it's the biggest idea you're going to hear this side of Christmas.
告诉我 说吧
Tell me about it, then. Come on.
嗯 嘿 - 你喜欢咖喱吗
Well, hey... - Do you like curry?
喜欢 我喜欢咖喱 继续
Yeah, I like curry. Come on.
是个手♥机♥应用
It's an app.
是个叫咖喱友的手♥机♥应用
It's an app called Vindr.
我觉得 我觉得它想法很棒
I think I think it's a brilliant idea.
我们只需要 多少钱 多少 - 嘘 嘘 嘘
We only need... How much? How much? - Sh, sh, sh!
闭嘴 闭嘴 给我安静点 还有你 闭嘴
Shut up. Shut up. Button it, you. And you, shut up.
你喜欢咖喱吗 - 闭嘴
Do you like curry? - Shut up.
我喜欢
I like it.
我真心喜欢
I REALLY like it.
噢耶 让我们偷过来
Hell, yeah! Let's steal it!
哇哦 不 不
Whoa, no, no...
来嘛 我们会把它偷过来 不是吗
Come on! We're going to steal it, aren't we?!
呃 不 只是
Er... No. Just...
我一路赶到这里 好吗
I've got all up to the table, OK?
所以最好有好事 说吧
So it'd better be good. Come on.
发明它的人是个很好的人
The guy who invented it is a really sweet guy,
但他最近的生活挺艰难的
you know, and life's been a bit hard on him recently.
我们不想给他造成困扰
We don't want to get on the wrong side of him.
没错 正是我想说 - 他是个
Yeah, that's what I was... - He is a...
我不管 我们改个名偷了它
I don't care about that. We'll change the name and steal it.
让他的律师拿我们没办法 - 他会有办法的 他就是他的律师
His lawyer won't be able to touch us. - He will. He's his lawyer.
他就是他们的律师
He is the lawyer of these guys.
认真点
Let's get serious.
来吧 给你和你的咖喱应用注入一笔大钱
Come on. Some big cash injections for you and your curry app.
300万英镑怎么样
How about we say 3 million pounds?
哦 成交 成交 就这样说定了 - 不 不 不
Oh, deal. Deal! Shake on it now. - No, no, no, no...
说定了
Shake on it now.
350万英镑怎么样
What about 3,500,000 pounds?
行 350万英镑
Fine. 3,500,000 pounds.
就是这样 谢谢
Exactly. Thank you.
来和我一起说 和我一起说 来
But say it with me. Say it with me, OK?
350万英镑 350万英镑
3.5 million pounds. 3.5 million pounds.
这才像话嘛 这才他妈的像话啊
Now, we're bloody talking! Now we're bloody talking!
让我登陆我的电脑 把合同拟定好
Let me just log in to my computer and get the contracts all drawn up.
等一下 哦不 等一下
Hang on. Oh, no. Hang on. Hang on.
等下 等下 等下
Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on.
哦不 不敢相信 不敢相信
Oh, no. I can't believe it. I can't believe it.
我不记得我那天杀的密♥码♥了 - 怎么了
I can't remember my God-blasted password. - What is it?
如果不记得的话会影响交易吗
Will this affect the deal, if you can't?
如果我不知道密♥码♥当然会影响我们的交易
Yeah, it will affect the deal if I can't find my password,
因为我没有办法拟定合同了 是吧
cos I can't put the contracts through, can I?
Susan 我密♥码♥是多少
Susan! What's my password?
D734 - 好吧
D734. - Fine.
好了 可以了 搞定
Right, fine. There. That's done.
你邮箱很快就能收到合同
Contracts will be in your inboxes in a secunda -
交易也就成了
deal's as good as done.
非常感谢 Kyle先生
Well, thank you very much, Mr Kyle.
嗷 - 很高兴和你合作
Ow! - Pleasure doing business with you.
也很高兴和你合作
Pleasure doing business with you, too.
嘿 先生们 看这个
Hey, gents. Look at this.
我能带点回去吗
Can I take some of that home with me,
只要一点 - 这样吧 Brock Wonderpenis
just a little...? - Do you know what, Brock Wonderpenis?
请自便 你们留这儿 玩得开心
Help yourselves. You stay here. Enjoy yourselves. Yeah?
因为我有个和医生的预约很急
Cos I've got an urgent doctor's appointment,
关于我的心脏 可能没什么
something about my heart. Probably nothing.
拜拜了 傻♥逼♥们
Ta-ta, you shitters!
想要抓住凶手 你要足够聪明 帅气 守时
To catch a killer, you have to be clever, handsome and punctual.
我组织了一场假的Incognito的新闻发布会
I organised a fake Incognito press conference,
利用Sid Lowecroft作为诱饵
using Sid Lowecroft as bait.
希望能把凶手引出来
Hopefully the murderer would strike again
在他们的秘密暴露之前
before their secrets were revealed.
目标已就位 目标已就位
The target is in position. The target is in position.
目标 我不是目标吧 是吗
Target? I'm not a target, am I?
你不是 Sid 闭嘴 闭嘴 你会让我们都暴露的
Yeah, Sid, shut up. Shut up, you'll give us away.
你会让我们暴露的 好了 你准备好了吗
You will give us away. Right, you ready for this?
准备好了
I've got it.
Sid准备 重复 Sid准备
Cue Sid, I repeat, cue Sid.
晚上好 女士们先生们 我们
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. We are...
Kyle要拿出什么东西了 LaBeouf要拿出什么东西了
Kyle's going for something. LaBeouf is going for something.
Millican要拿出什么东西了
Millican is going for something.
开枪 孩子 开枪
Take the shot, kid. Take the shot!
什么
What the...?
干得好 好了 快点 跟我来
Well done. Right, quick. Follow me.
我们要尽快下去
We need to get down there asap.
所有人不许动
Everybody freeze.
刚才是警方的就地正♥法♥
That's an official police killing.
我是Sleet探长 - 哦 天
I'm DI Sleet. - Oh, God.
哦天啊 哦天啊 天啊
Oh, God. Oh, God.
那是什么
What is that?
那是Sarah Millican 长官
That's Sarah Millican, sir.
她刚中了George Shelley一枪
She just took a bullet from George Shelley.
是你吗 George - 是的
Did you, George? - Yes.
能解释一下吗 - 有许多理由
Care to explain why? - There's quite a few reasons.
首先 她不愿意告诉我
First reason is, she wouldn't tell me
谋杀案那天晚上8点她在哪
where she was at eight o'clock on the night of the murder.
随后我发现 当我们走出电梯
And then I realised when we came out of the lift,
墙上写着D734
on the walls it said D734,
Ed Sheeran桌上的便利贴也写着这串字符
which was written on the post-it note in Ed Sheeran's desk,
我觉得他黑进了他们的主机
and I think he hacked into their mainframe,
然后我问她 他们在死亡集团做了什么
and then I asked her what they did at Death Corp -
死亡集团这个名字显然就是要杀谁
I mean as if Death Corp isn't an obvious name itself to kill someone,
当我这么跟她说了 她回答
and then, when I told her, she said,
"如果我告诉你 我就得杀了你了"
"If I tell you, I'm going to have to kill you."
所以 我觉得他黑进去了
So, I think he hacked in,
她不得不杀了他 - 哇哦
she had to kill him. - Wow!
精彩 真的精彩
That's brilliant. That's absolutely brilliant.
我非常佩服你这么难以置信的愚蠢
I'm very, very impressed on how unbelievably stupid you are!
你个小鬼
You child!
你个差劲的人类
You pathetic excuse for a human being.
你应该射的是Jeremy Kyle
The person you should have shot was Jeremy Kyle.
知道吗 - 嘿 你们做什么
Yeah? - Hey, what are you doing?
Jeremy 你还会投资咖喱友吗
Jeremy, will you still invest in Vindr?
滚蛋 放开我
Do one! Get your hands off me.
该死 - 完全正确 George
Damn it! - You were absolutely right, George.
没错 那个纸条确实写的是D734 不是"救命"
Yes, the note did say D734, not "Help".
但是D734是Kyle电脑的密♥码♥
Yes? But D734 was the password to Kyle's computer.
我的密♥码♥是多少
What's my password?
D734
D734.
而且Jeremy Kyle没有不在场证明
And Jeremy Kyle didn't have an alibi.
我昨晚一直在外面
I was out all last night.
知道我在哪吗 他妈的不知道 一点都不知道
You know where I was? No bloody idea. Haven't a clue.
Millican有不在场证明的
Millican did have an alibi. Yeah?
这是你昨晚8点的会议记录
Here are the minutes from your meeting at 20:00 hours yesterday.
老天爷啊
God Almighty!
我见过培养皿养出来的东西都比你聪明 蠢货
I've come across things growing on petri dishes with more intelligence than you, you twat!
你还有什么辩解的话吗
What have you got to say for yourself!
我能留下端咖啡吗
Can I at least be coffee boy?
不 你不行
No, you can't be,
因为警局没有功夫
because the police department hasn't got the resources
一直给你擦屁♥股♥
to continue wiping your arse for you.
我们已经有个大宝宝了