老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S08E09
Part 1
Oct. 22, 2020, 2:07 p.m.
Well, it's come to this--
好吧 堕落至此了
we're drinking with our baby in a bar.
我们带着宝宝在酒吧里喝酒
It is not a bar.
这不是酒吧
It's a restaurant that happens to have a bar.
这是家餐厅 碰巧有吧台而已
Ergo, we are good parents.
因此 我们还是称职的父母
Unrelated, I'm getting faced right now.
这毫无关联 我现在受到良心的谴责了
Papa needs a grease coat.
爸爸要吃东西安慰自己一下
While it is heartwarming to watch
看着你们的新生儿用乳牙
your firstborn teethe on a jalapeno popper,
吃着墨西哥胡椒卷 真是感人肺腑啊
wasn't Mickey gonna watch him today?
但今天不是应该米奇带他吗
My dad's out all week.
我爸这周是不行了
He's got the sniffles.
他有点伤风鼻塞了
For someone who's survived numerous beatings
对于一个被高♥利♥贷♥债主追打过无数次
from loan sharks,
还能幸存下来的人来说
he has a surprisingly delicate constitution.
他有着异常脆弱的身体内部构造
Well, my semester's over
我这学期的课结束了
and the GNB building is finally done.
GNB大楼也终于建成了
If you guys want, I'm free to watch Marvin.
如果有需要的话 我可以照看马文啊
I'm meeting with a headhunter next week
我下周要去见一个猎头
to line up my next project,
为我的下一个工程做准备
but until then, what the hell?
不过那也是下周的事 怕啥啊
Ted, although a "what the hell" attitude is
泰德 虽然你这种"怕啥啊"的态度
incredibly sought after in a babysitter,
非常符合临时保姆的条件
I think that Lily and Marshall...
但我想莉莉和马修...
You're hired.
你被录用了
Now that we've been parents for a while,
我们为人父母已经有一阵子了
we realize that pretty much any moron
我们意识到 无论什么白♥痴♥
can take care of a baby.
都能照顾好小孩
Thank you.
多谢您了
Mine!
我的
Ow. Delicious and mine.
美味可口 专属于我
They do look yummy yum-yum, mister.
它们看起来真好吃吃哟 帅哥
No. No!
不 不
What have I done?!
我都做了什么
I am so sorry, Cornelius.
我非常抱歉 科尼利厄斯
You deserve a better end than this!
你的下场不该是这样
You got ketchup on a red tie.
红色的领带粘上番茄酱
You can't even see it.
根本看不出来啊
Clear!
清场
I'm going in.
我要上了
Oh, my...
我的天
Damn it, guys, we lost him.
该死 各位 救不回他了
And he was so close to retirement.
他本来都快退休 安享天年了
Just this morning he said to me,
就今天早上 他才对我说
"I'm getting too old for this shirt."
"我要老到配不起这件衬衫了"
I know, dude.
我懂的 伙计
Oh, my God.
我的天
You are such a good folder.
你真会叠东西
That's, like, The Gap good.
简直有GAP服装店员的水平啊
Robin...
罗宾
...let's go hit the bar.
跟我一起去吧台
At this restaurant.
这间餐厅里
I think they have a bar here.
他们好像有个吧台呢
Okay, what was that? What was what?
好了 你刚是干嘛 什么干嘛
The "dumb cheerleader flirting with the quarterback" thing.
白♥痴♥拉拉队长对四分卫投怀送抱的场景
You looked like you were gonna
你看起来像是要
chase Barney down with
提着六罐装的西瓜清爽酒
a sixer of watermelon wine coolers.
追着巴尼不放似的
First of all, those bad girls come in fourskis.
首先 那酒是四罐装的好吗
And second, why would I be flirting with Barney?
第二 我♥干♥嘛要勾引巴尼啊
I'm not interested in him, and I made that very clear.
我对他没兴趣 我用实际行动
With something that I did.
表明得很清楚了
Recently. Just spill it.
就在最近哦 快直说吧
The other week, Barney made a move,
几周前 巴尼主动吻了我
but I turned him down.
但我拒绝了他
I felt awful for closing the door in his face,
我为我对当面对他关上感情之门歉疚
but he realized I was right.
但他意识到 我是对的
I'm done trying to get you.
我彻底放弃争取你了
I can't do it anymore.
我无法再继续了
And now I get it. Get what?
现在我明白了 明白什么了
You may have closed the door on Barney,
虽然你对巴尼关上了门
but he locked it.
但他可是锁上了门
What? No, he didn't.
什么 不 他没有
Yeah, he got the last word,
对 是他说了结束的话
and now you want what you can't have,
你现在又想要你得不到的东西
like you always do.
你一直都是这样
It's the classic lobster situation.
就像你当年的龙虾案重演
I'm afraid you're allergic to lobster.
恐怕你对龙虾过敏
You can never, ever, ever have it.
你永远永远永远不能再吃了
Oh, this... is... delicious.
真是人间美味
Once you learned you couldn't have lobster,
你一得知自己不能再吃龙虾
you became obsessed.
你就非吃到不可
Barney's the same thing.
对巴尼也是一样
And this is gonna blow up in your face,
而你只会最后落得难堪下场
just like the lobster blew up your face.
就像龙虾害你有个"难看"下场
Wrong. This is nothing like lobster.
错了 跟龙虾案完全不一样
Okay.
好吧
Just remember, you can never hook up with Barney again.
那就记住 你永远不能跟巴尼搞在一起了
That's fine. Never.
没关系 永远不行
ever, ever, ever, ever.
这辈子 下辈子 下下辈子都不行
Oh, no.
不是吧
Marshall, Lily and Ted can't make it,
我刚收到短♥信♥ 马修 莉莉和泰德
for viable reasons I just learned
都因为各种原因来不了了
via this text message I accidentally deleted.
这短♥信♥我还不小心删掉了
Guess it's just gonna be you and me.
看来只有我和你了
Fine by me.
我没问题
Me, too. Totally.
我也是 绝对没问题
Supafine.
超级没问题
Hey there, Scherbats, your voice of reason here.
喂 施巴斯基 我是你的理智之声
What you doing?
你在干什么
I hope you don't mind,
希望你不要介意
but I was hungry, so I ordered MacLaren's new special.
但我饿了 所以点了麦克拉伦的新菜
I couldn't eat lunch at work because they ordered
我没在上班的地方吃午餐 因为他们点了
Thai food.
泰国菜
I miss you, Cornelius!
我真想念你 科尼利厄斯
Oh, my God.
我的天啊
You're so sensitive.
你好多愁善感
And deep.
又有深度
No. You're better than this.
不行 你可比这强多了
Barney is not like lobster.
巴尼不是龙虾
Okay, that's unfortunate, but it doesn't mean
好吧 这有点倒霉 但还是不意味着
you have to hook up with Barney.
你就得跟巴尼搞上
God, you said that out loud!
天啊 你居然说出声了
No, I didn't.
我才没有
How would you know? You're out of control.
你怎么知道 你简直失控了
Oh, you think you're so smart, don't you, bitch?
你以为自己很聪明是不是 贱♥货♥
Um, billion-dollar idea alert.
价值十亿美元的点子出炉了
Why should bibs only be socially acceptable
为什么只有在吃龙虾的时候
when you're eating lobster?
大家才能接受穿围嘴呢
If we could wear them all the time,
如果我们能时刻都戴着
then Corny would still be with us right now.
科尼现在就还与我们同在呢
Damn it...
该死
Picture a bib that looks like your suit:
想象一件看似你西装的围嘴
a collar, a tie, a jacket.
有领子 领带 和外套
Atta girl. Keep it cool.
乖女孩 继续保持冷静
I could call them Brobibs!
我可以叫它 "兄弟围嘴"
That's interesting.
真有趣
Yeah, you got this.
对 你做得很好
I'm sorry I called you a bitch.
抱歉我刚才叫你贱♥货♥
What do you think?
你觉得如何
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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