理发店的笑声（2015）

I was crying, actually.
我是在哭
Yeah, me too.
我也是
I'm just so sad about... about Mr. Painter.
我只是太难过了 因为Painter老师的事情
Ohh. That's what I'm sad about.
哦 我也是
I'm lying.
我在撒谎
I'm not really crying about Mr. Painter.
我不是在为Painter老师而哭
Me neither. I never even had him. I took algebra twice.
我也不是 我都没上过他的课 我代数上了两次
I'm crying because I'm just so happy I'm pregnant.
我哭是因为怀孕让我喜极而泣
And I'm happy for you.
我也为你感到高兴
We're both so happy about you being pregnant.
我们都为你怀孕感到高兴
Go, team! Yay!
加油 咱俩 耶
No, I'm not... I'm not really crying about that, Mo.
不 其实 我不是为这个而哭 Mo
I'm crying because I'm stuck.
我哭是因为我陷入困境了
I don't think I want to be pregnant with Bart's baby.
我觉得我不想怀Bart的孩子
I don't think I want to be pregnant with Bart's baby, either.
我觉得我也不想怀Bart的孩子
Hey, men's wearhouse.
嘿 男人衣仓(品牌)
You sure you're gonna like the way you look?
你真的喜欢这样的打扮吗
Ah. What?
怎么了
Somebody die?
谁死了吗
Oh, right.
哦 对
You know, you can still come with me to Mr.Painter's funeral.
其实你还是可以跟我一起去Painter老师的葬礼的
Hmm. Is it an open bar?
酒水免费吗
No? "Passachusetts."
不行吗 免谈
You know, maybe you should try forgiving him.
也许你应该试着原谅他
I mean, what's the point to holding on to this?
你纠结于此意义何在呢
Mm, I like a good grudge. Keeps my edges sharp.
我喜欢怀恨在心 这让我保持最好的状态
That's why I'm so successful. Forgiveness is for suckers.
所以我才这么成功 傻子才会谈原谅
Uh-huh. Remind me again where it says that in the bible.
圣经里可没有说过这个
It doesn't. It's implied.
是没有 但这是里面所隐含的
That's why Jesus was a carpenter
所以耶稣才是个木匠
And not the owner of a home depot franchise.
而不是一家建材公♥司♥特许经营的店主
You know, I always used to think that this was an act,
我以前一直以为你是因为
that you deliberately put up walls
在高中不受欢迎
because you weren't popular in high school.
才故意设了心防作出这副样子
Now I think behind the wall is just more wall.
现在我觉得你的心防后面只有更多心防
See, that's where you're wrong, A.J.
这你就错了AJ
I have a big heart, all right?
我是有一颗伟大的心的 好吗
I just don't show you people because I'm the boss
只是我不能让你们看到它 因为我是老板
and I need to maintain separation.
我需要保持距离感
Okay, well, mission accomplished.
你的目的达到了
By the way, if you ever want to be the kind of guy
顺便说一句 如果你想让我和你
I would go to a ball game with,
一起去看球的话
maybe try showing that heart once in a while.
试着时不时展示一下你那颗伟大的心
Where the hell are you going?
你又是要去哪
That teacher's funeral.
那个老师的葬礼
I've been crying all day!
我都哭了一整天了
Didn't even go to our high school.
他都没上过我们的高中
Rita, where you been?
Rita你去哪儿了
The toilet.
厕所
You went to the bathroom in the presence of a dead person?
你在死人面前啊 怎么还上厕所
She wasn't in the presence of him.
她不在死人面前啊
She was in the can.
她是在厕所格里
He could have been there in some form, Rosalee.
他可能以某种形式在那里呢 Rosalee
Okay. So what are you saying, Rhonda?
你什么意思啊Rhonda
That you think Mr. Painter's ghost
你是觉得Painter老师的鬼魂
is flying around the john, watching girls tinkle?
在厕所周围游荡 然后看小姑娘撒尿吗
Yeah, it's not Chuck Berry in that casket.
就是啊 那个棺材里装的可不是Chuck Berry
You don't know what he was into, Rita!
你又不知道他有什么癖好 Rita
He was a math teacher.
他可是个数学老师
Well, because of you, Rhonda, our bathroom is full of fireworks
就因为你Rhonda 我们的卫生间里塞满了烟火
so I can't go at home.
所以我才不能在家上厕所
It would actually be
要是我想遵守家规
dangerous if I tried to follow the house rules.
就真的危险了
What house rules?
什么家规
She who drops one down the hatch...
谁先上大号♥
Is the one who lights the match.
谁就放烟花
Beautiful service, huh?
服务真好哈
It's Bart. I'm gonna take this. Okay.
是Bart打来的 我得接 好
Well, that was that.
好了就是这样了
I thought you said Ben wasn't coming.
你不是说Ben不会来吗
What?
什么
Huh. "I did not expect that."
我还真没想到他会来啊
What is that voice you do? I never know who that is.
你这声音是在模仿谁 我从来都不知道
Johnny Carson.
Johnny Carson
"If the glove don't fit you must acquit" Johnny Carson?
说过 如果手套不合适你必须无罪释放 的那个Johnny Carson吗
That question is parked right at the intersection of cute
你问这个问题真是可爱无知呢
and you've got to be kidding me.
你这是耍我吗
I'm sorry I'm late.
对不起我迟到了
I didn't think you were coming.
我以为你不会来呢
Look, I don't want to be the kind of guy
听着 我不想成为
that nobody wants to go to a ballgame with.
没人想跟我一起看球的那种人
I'm sorry about that. Obviously I was wrong.
对不起 我错了
I don't give you enough credit for being a good guy.
我没好好地坚信你是个好人
Look, if a guy dying right outside my shop
如果一个男人死在我店门口
isn't enough to let go of some petty grievance,
还不足以让我放下一些轻微的委屈
you know, what kind of person would I be?
那我成了什么人了
Okay, that's enough. That's enough.
你够了 够了
It's not tight. It's enough.
这太松了 够了
Now it's done.
现在好了
If you don't mind, I'm gonna pay my respects.
你们不介意的话 我要凭吊告别了
Wow. You must have really gotten through to him.
哇你一定是彻底说通他了
You're good.
你真棒
Thank you, Daniel.
谢谢你 Daniel
That's not gonna stick.
这个名字不会一直叫下去的
I don't know. I just heard someone say it.
这可说不好啊 我刚刚听到有人这么叫了哦
I don't know if you can hear me, Mr. Painter,
不知道你听得见我讲话吗Painter老师
but if you can, I just want to say two words to you.
但如果你可以的话 我只想对你说两个字
"Ha" And "Ha."
哈 哈
Yeah. That's right.
对
I'm not really sad,
我不是真的伤心
but I do want to show my friends I'm not a heartless monster,
但我真的想展现给我的朋友们看 我不是一个没心没肺的怪物
so here's what I'm gonna do.
所以我打算这么做
I'm gonna create the illusion of grief by hanging my head
我要像我看过的很多电影里那样垂下头
like I've seen in so many movies.
来制♥造♥我悲痛的假象
How's that? Convincing?
怎么样 令人信服吗
If it's convincing, don't say anything.
如果这么做让人信服 就别说话
Good. That's what I thought.
好 我也是这么想的
Now I'm gonna shake my shoulders so it looks like I'm crying.
现在我要抖动我的肩膀 让我看上去像在哭
Is he crying?
他在哭吗
That's what it looks like.
看上去是这样
Oh, yeah. Look what time it is.
看看都几点了
Time for the big finish.
是时候来个完美谢幕了
Oh, man. I'm gonna bring the show on home
我要在你冰冷的前额上用一个暖心的吻
with a heartwarming kiss on your ice-cold forehead.
让这幕剧结尾
I wouldn't be surprised if the crowd goes, "Aww."
如果大家发出惊叹我也不觉得惊讶
Oh, god. It's Wednesday.
天啊 今天星期三
You have got to stop sitting in the front row.
你千万别再坐在前排了
I know.
(我也知道)
There you are.
你在这儿啊
Hey. Sorry I had to run out.
对不起我必须离开那里
How was the rest of the funeral?
剩下的葬礼怎么样
It was upsetting.
挺糟心的
It's hard to say goodbye to a beloved teacher.
和一位受人爱戴的老师告别总是很难的
That's not what was upsetting.
这不是糟心的原因
How you doing?
你怎么样
I'm okay.
我还好
I'm sorry you had to see me cry like that.
对不起让你看到我哭成那样
Uh, no. If anyone should apologize, it's me.
不 应该是我道歉才对
I just got caught up in the moment.
是我情难自禁了
But the truth is...
但是实际上