老妈驾到（2021）

Call Your Mother S01E01

Part 3 Jan. 15, 2021, 1 p.m.

不是吓人的幽灵是突然玩消失
Not ghost like "Boo." Ghost like "Bye, boo."
安迪就这么走了现在你们俩在交往吗
A-Andy just left? And now you two are dating?
不我是基佬
Oh, no. I'm gay.
我知道你看不出来
Yeah, you couldn't tell.
我不是真正的"洛杉矶基佬"
I'm not really "L.A. Gay" yet.
我现在还是伍斯特基佬那是我的家乡
I did okay in Wooster. That's where I'm from.
那里的基佬都很低调
I mean, it's very low-key homo there.
虽然派特克的宠物美容店很热闹
Like, the grooming shop at Petco was kind of a scene,
但也不像这里
but nothing like here.
杰姬说得对你很好说话啊
Jackie's right. You're very easy to talk to.
杰姬为什么要瞒着我
Why is Jackie keeping secrets from me?
她和安迪分手了还不和她弟联♥系♥
She broke up with Andy and she's not speaking to her brother?
杰姬还有个弟弟
Jackie has a brother?
什么
What the hell?
杰姬很注重隐私
Jackie's very private.
要不是因为墙不隔音
Like, I only found out about her dating Hank
我也不知道她和汉克在交往
because the walls are so thin.
汉克是谁
Wh-Who's Hank?
她的老板
Her boss.
我不该多嘴的他很老
I shouldn't say more. He's old.
我只能告诉你这么多
That's all you're getting out of me.
他开的是PT漫步者
He drives a PT Cruiser.
好吧够了
Okay. That's enough.
莱恩你和杰姬明晚过来吃晚饭
Lane, you and Jackie are coming over for dinner tomorrow night.
我们把所有的事说清楚
We're gonna get this whole thing out in the open.
我提前道个歉场面可能会很难看
And I apologize in advance. It could get ugly.
我在去圣经夏令营的路上对父母出柜了
I came out to my parents on the drive to Bible Camp.
那才叫难看呢
You don't know ugly.
怎么会这样
How did this happen?
我一直和孩子们关系很好的
I was always the mom who had the special bond with her kids.
他们以前什么都告诉我
They used to tell me everything.
弗雷迪以为自己破处时
I was the first person that Freddie called
第一个就打给了我
when he thought he lost his virginity.
我先回答你之前的问题
So to answer your question,
无线网络密♥码♥在路由器背面
uh, the Wi-Fi password is on the back of the router.
是"Kookaburra"
It's "Kookaburra."
对不起有点接受不了吧
Sorry. I guess that's a lot.
我只是不想让我的孩子最后去看心理医生
I just never wanted to be the mom whose kids ended up in therapy,
浪费钱和庸医聊天
talking to some overpriced quack
毕竟那人没当上真正的医生
who wasn't smart enough to be a real doctor.
我就是心理医生
I'm a therapist.
密♥码♥是Kookaburra吗
Kookaburra, you say?
我知道你想和孩子们亲近
Look, I know you want to be close to your kids, of course.
但有时我们过早地失去一个人
But sometimes when we lose someone prematurely,
比如你的丈夫
like you have with your husband,
就会让我们紧紧抓住所爱之人
it can cause us to hold on to those we love tighter
而我们真正需要的其实是放手
than we would otherwise when what's really needed is to let them go.
你真厉害
Wow, you're good.
他们来了你赶紧走吧
They're here. Get out.
好的没问题我这就走
Yes, okay. I will -- I will leave,
别让你和家人的不愉快
but hey, don't -- please don't let your time with family
影响你的评价好吗
affect your review, okay?
记住哪怕你的孩子只有两星
Just remember that your stay here can still be five stars
这里依然是五星体验哦
even though your kids are like two.
好吧我走了
Okay, I'll go.
妈你怎么来了
Mom, I can't believe you're here.
你还去了我的公♥寓♥
I-I can't believe you went over to my apartment.
还跟我朋友套问
I can't believe you pumped my friend for information
我的私生活
about my personal life.
不是套问
Not pumped.
我是自愿倾诉的
Charmed.
杰姬你为什么不告诉我你和安迪分手了
Jackie, why didn't you tell me that you and Andy broke up?
妈你为什么邀请杰姬
Mom! Why did you invite Jackie?
你是杰姬吗
Oh, you're Jackie?
你一点也不像我杰姬表亲
You look nothing like my cousin Jackie.
我杰姬表亲长得都不像她自己了
Well, my cousin Jackie doesn't even look like my cousin Jackie.
她换了下巴
She got a new chin.
我喜欢你的房♥子
Oh, I love your house.
背景墙真不错
So many great backgrounds.
杰姬跟你弟打个招呼
Jackie, say hi to your brother.
他真的很想你
He really missed you.
我没说啊
I didn't say that.
她很想你
Well, she misses you.
我是说他很傻
I said he was stupid.
拜托孩子们
Come on, you guys.
你们必须和好
You have to patch things up.
这就是你飞过来的原因吗
Oh, is this why you flew out here?
干涉我的生活吗
To butt into my life?
不我是飞来干涉弗雷迪的生活的
No. I flew out here to butt into Freddie's life.
但我发现不知怎么的弗雷迪过得很好
But then I find out that somehow Freddie's doing great
而你一团糟
and you're a mess.
"不知怎么的"弗雷迪过得很好
Oh, "Somehow" Freddie is doing great.
谢谢妈
Thanks, Mom.
"不知怎么的" 在他"出乎意料的"好公♥寓♥过得很好
"Somehow" Doing great in his "Shockingly" nice apartment.
我叫西莉亚衣服裤子都挺好看
Celia. Cute top. Cute bottoms.
我叫莱恩谢谢
Lane. Thanks.
你穿得也很好看
Cute everything on you, too.
你和弗雷德的姐姐交往多久了
How long have you been dating Fred's sister?
我们没在交往我是基佬
Oh, we're not dating. I'm gay.
看不出来是正常的
Don't worry that you couldn't tell.
我看得出来我只是不知道你愿不愿意说
I could tell. I just didn't know if you could tell.
我们每天都聊天
We talk every day.
但我来到这里才知道
But I have to come here to find out
你在和老头交往弗雷迪在和
that you're dating an old man and Freddie's dating...
深色头发的女孩交往
a brunette.
伙计们我给你们讲个故事
You guys, let me tell you a story.
你们爸爸去世时我觉得很孤独
When your dad died, I felt completely alone.
但你们知道谁每天都来找我吗
But you know who showed up for me every day?
我的家人
My family.
是的他们会带桌游和超级难吃的食物
Yep. With board games and terrible, terrible food.
好多金枪鱼热菜
So much tuna hot dish.
他们帮我渡过了难关
And they -- they got me through it.
但你们无法选择自己的家人
But you don't get to pick your family.
你们以为我有的选吗
You think I picked mine?
相信"地平说"的达芙妮姨妈
Aunt Daphne the Flat-Earther?
我兄弟吉姆的嘴角经常有白色残留物
My brother Jim with the white stuff in the corners of his mouth
他妻子口袋里还有老鼠
or his wife with the rat in her pocket
那个有震动眼的利亚姆表亲
or your cousin Liam with the vibrating eye.
家人都是上天安排的
When it comes to family, you get what you get.
你们俩是彼此的家人
And you two got each other.
还有我
And you got me.
我们是一个村子的人
And we are a village.
我回家了
I'm going home.
不你留下我回家
No, you stay. I'll go home.
孩子们这里就是你们的家
You guys, I am your home.
我是你们的母亲
I am also still your mother
在你们和好之前谁都不许走
and neither one of you are leaving until you make up.
这招不管用了妈
Yeah, that doesn't work anymore, Mom.
为什么
Why?!
你不是要走吗
I thought you were leaving.
我在叫快车
I'm calling a Lyft.
你的车呢
Where's your car?
我不想说
I don't want to talk about it.
你不是也要走吗
I thought you were leaving.
我得等西莉亚
I have to wait for Celia.
抱歉你妈一直抱着我不撒手
Sorry, your mom just stopped hugging me.
没话说吗
Nothing?
好吧那圣诞节见
Okay, well, we'll see you at Christmas then.
走吧西莉亚我们走
Come on, Celia, let's get out of here.
弗雷德慢着
Fred, stop.