老妈驾到（2021）

Call Your Mother S01E03

Part 3 March 1, 2021, 10:31 a.m.

I'll go with her.
不用了谢谢
No, thank you.
怎么回事这家伙是谁
What's going on? Who's this guy?
我的勤杂工
He's my handyman.
我说了我自己来
I told you I was gonna do the work myself.
然后我一笑了之并打给了查德
And then I laughed and called Chad.
我不需要帮助谢谢这些活我会干
I don't need any help, thanks. I know what I'm doing.
手动锯我明白了
Manual saw, huh? Eh, I get it.
很多人都怕电
Lot of guys are scared of the power.
热啊
Ooh, boy.
贴身衣物可以吸汗所以
The, uh, bottom layer wicks the moisture, so...
你干过很多修理工作吗
So, uh, do you do a lot of repair work?
我是心理医生所以主要是修复心理
Well, I'm a therapist, so, uh, mainly repair psyches,
感情问题自我形象
relationships, self-image.
有点像灵魂的建筑师
Kind of an architect of the soul.
哥们我太笨了听不懂啊
Dude, I am way not brainy enough for that.
这可能就是为什么我和谢丽尔的关系
That's probably why my thing with Cheryl
永远都是肉体上的
will never be anything more than physical.
查德看起来很棒啊
So, Chad seems great.
他是你的新男友吗
He's your new boyfriend?
淡定只是炮♥友♥
Calm down. It's just sex.
他不适合当爸爸
It's not like I think he's a great dad.
因为他可能还在和他爸一起住呢
Yeah, that's 'cause he probably still lives with his dad.
你这么没有安全感啊
Oh, how embarrassing for you
也太丢人了吧
that you're so easily threatened.
我想让你看看我多有安全感
You know, just to show you how non-threatened I am,
我去和他谈谈
I'm going to make conversation with the guy.
查德是叫查德[孔屑]吗
Chad, is it? Chad?
怪不得
Makes sense.
所以勤杂工查德
So, uh... Chad the handyman.
你经常用锤子砍木头
Bet all the, uh -- the hammering and the wood and stuff,
才练的这一身肌肉吧
bet that really helps for what you got going on there.
谢谢
Oh, thanks.
是啊我还会抽时间锻炼
Yeah, I still make time for a workout.
是吗怎么锻炼
Oh, yeah? What's that look like?
都挺正常的我4点左右醒来
It's nothing crazy. I wake up around 4:00,
完成角斗士训练
run through my Gladiator workout,
喝了一杯早餐奶昔
down an Afterburn breakfast shake,
来个7英里的小道攀爬
do a 7-mile trail scramble --
厉害啊听起来不错
Wow, good for you. That sounds great.
有些人可能会想
Some people might think that
你锻炼这么多是为了掩盖更深层次的不安感
that much exercise masks a deeper insecurity.
-是吗 -你在干什么
- They do? - What are you doing?
你跟他说什么了
What are you saying to him?
没什么我们就是增进一下感情
Nothing. We're just bonding.
-对吧查德 -我也说不好
- Right, Chad? - I don't know.
这只是我的看法但是
I mean, it's -- it's just my opinion, but, uh...
我觉得你和老女人交往可能只是在弥补
I'd say dating an older woman is probably making up
你和你妈情感上的缺失
for the emotional closeness you lacked with your mother.
你♥爸♥一直希望你像他一样坚强
Dad always wanted you to be a tough guy like him.
一定很孤独吧
I mean, that must have been lonely.
直到有一天你发现巧克力也可以代替爱情
Until the day you discovered that chocolate can replace love.
突然间你就成了古德巴尔先生
Then all of a sudden, you're being raised
和戈迪瓦夫人的乖宝宝
by Mr. Goodbar and Lady Godiva.
你为什么还在跟他说话
Why are you still talking to him?
但是那个胖乎乎的孩子并没有因为体重的增加
But the, uh -- the chubby kid doesn't exactly disappear
就消失了对吧查德
with the weight, now, does he, Chad?
他们以前都喊我胖子查德
They used to call me Chaddy the Fatty.
小孩说的话也很扎心的
Kids can be cruel.
不是我父母喊的
No, my parents!
为什么
Why?!
你做了什么
What have you done?
我需要一个医生
I need a doctor!
我把车停在救护车后面了
I parked behind an ambulance,
所以如果有人需要出去
so if anybody needs to get out...
-弗雷迪 -妈妈
- Freddie! - Mom!
你为什么不给我回电♥话♥
W-Why didn't you call me back?
我在跟你姐增进感情呢
I was bonding with your sister.
你打给你妈了
You called your mom?
你的手怎么了
What happened to your hand?
西莉亚给我的伤口抹了药
Celia gave me something for my wound,
现在我的手合不拢了
and now I can't close my hand.
我只是给他抹了点柳树皮
I just gave him a little willow bark.
-这是天然的阿司匹林 -他对阿司匹林过敏
- It's nature's aspirin. - He's allergic to aspirin.
是的我现在知道了
Yes, I'm aware of that now.
我儿子很痛苦赶紧治好他的手
My son is in pain! Fix his hand!
女士
Ma'am!
你越大声我就越不想帮你
The louder you get, the less I want to help you.
赶紧治好他的手
Fix his hand.
我送你去检查室
I'll get you set up in an exam room.
有些表格需要你填
I have some forms for you.
你可以找一个人陪你
One of them can come back with you.
好好选
Choose wisely.
妈妈知道我的病史
I mean, Mom knows my medical history,
所以还是让她陪我吧
so she -- she should probably come.
妈
Mom?
西莉亚
Celia?
弗雷迪对树皮过敏
Freddie's having an allergic reaction to bark.
我妈去礼品店给我买♥♥泰迪熊了吗
And my mom went to go get me a teddy bear from the gift shop?
没有她去照顾弗雷迪了
No, she went back there to take care of Freddie.
再看看他们能不能把绳子接上
And probably see if they can reattach the cord.
逗我呢
You've gotta be frickin' kidding me!
我要炸毛了
I'm so triggered right now.
我妈把我的脚趾弄断了
My mom broke my toe.
真的吗她一定很难受吧
Oh, really? She must feel terrible.
她一定坐在候诊室
She must be sitting in the waiting room
想办法怎么补偿你吧
wondering how she can make it up to you.
等等不她没有
Oh, wait. No, she's not.
你还是在跟我说话吗
Are you still talking to me?
难以置信我和他说了我的感受
I just can't believe it. I tell her how I feel,
然后她就为了弗雷迪抛弃了我
and then she ditches me for Freddie.
是啊弗雷迪也很混
Yeah, well, he's a jerk, too.
你是对的
You were right.
他们肯定有个圈子
They totally have a little club.
但你知道吗
But you know what?
我们就让他们拥有那个愚蠢的圈子吧
We should just let them have their stupid club
我们可以自己建个圈子
and we could have our own club.
但我们的圈子衣品更棒
Except our club will have cuter clothes,
所以你的大鞋子和
except for your big shoe and...
这条裤子还是别穿了
whatever those pants are.
我们不带他们玩也不用征求他们的意见
And we'll exclude them and we won't ask their advice
然后给你买♥♥一件新上衣
and we'll get you a new top.
我们可以成为彼此的紧急联♥系♥人
And hey, we could be each other's emergency contacts.
我一直没有紧急联♥系♥人
I've never had an emergency contact.
但15个人的紧急联♥系♥人都是我
But I'm 15 other people's.
有点扫兴
That kind of bums me out.
这会变成一个悲伤的圈子吗
Is this gonna be a sad club?
因为我妈不爱我而成立的圈子吗
The club that I started 'cause my mom doesn't love me?
很有可能
Probably.
想去喝一杯吗
Wanna go get a drink?
我在吃止痛药
Actually, I'm on painkillers.
太好了再吃一粒
Ooh, perfect. Pop another one,
我去弄点伏特加然后咱俩找个地方嗨起来
I'll grab some vodka, and we'll meet in a happy place.
丹尼
Danny?
杰姬你们没事吧
Jackie? Is everything okay?
我妈把我的脚趾弄断了
My mom broke my toe.
我给弗雷迪下了毒
I poisoned Freddie.
我开枪打了谢丽尔的男朋友
I shot Cheryl's boyfriend.
不是我男朋友只是炮♥友♥
Not my boyfriend. Just sex.
我好像要晕过去了
I think I'm blacking out.
好吧