艾比酒吧

如果你想花在其他地方
and you want to spend it differently,
我相信詹姆斯会理解的
I'm sure James would understand.
事实上他不会 他会吓一大跳的
Yeah, actually, he won't. He'll be devastated.
但我们可以给吉姆和路易斯打电♥话♥
But we'll call Jim and Louise.
他们知道该做什么
They'll know what to do.
谢谢 我会好好考虑的
Thanks, I'll think about it.
最后同样重要的是
And last but not least,
我得谢谢D奶奶
I got to give a thanks to Granny D.
她不是真的死了 只是住在加拿大了
She's not actually dead. She just lives in Canada.
他不是已经谢过他奶奶了吗
Didn't he already thank his grandma?
他谢过了所有人
He's thanked everyone.
他已经这样二十分钟了
He's been doing this for 20 minutes.
我的天 它在哪里
Oh, my God! Where is it?
爆米狗机在哪里
Where's the PopDog?
等等 让我猜一下 你把它包了起来
Wait, let me guess. You wrapped it up
就像圣诞节的雷克萨斯
like a Lexus on Christmas,
打了个蝴蝶结 停在车道上
and it's in the driveway with a bow on it.
抱歉 詹姆斯 这里没有爆米狗机
I'm sorry, James. There's not gonna be a PopDog.
什么
What?
我可是堂堂正正赢了点唱机轮盘游戏
I won Wheel of Jukebox fair and square.
你们都看见了 丹选中了我
You all saw it. Dan picked me.
我可没选任何人
I-I didn't pick anyone.
请别强行把我卷进这个话题
Please don't drag me back into this.
原来你在啊 丹 请勿见怪
Oh, you're in this Dan, but no hard feelings.
我会给你买♥♥个茄子的
Let me buy you an eggplant.
各位 我们得帮帮艾比
Guys, we got to support Abby here.
是关于钱的事
It's her money.
她爸给她这笔钱作为礼物
Her dad gave it to her as a gift.
现在她要决定该如何花这笔钱
So she should be able to decide how it's spent.
不 不是这么回事
No, it's not that.
支票被退回了
The check bounced.
支票兑现处的柜员说
Check cashing place and the guy behind the counter
这张支票被退回了 然后我说
said the check bounced, and I said,
「不 先生 这不可能
"No, sir, that's impossible.
这张支票是我爸给我的」
My dad sent me this check."
然后说到一半 我想了想
and then mid-sentence I thought,
「这当然有可能」
"Oh, of course it did."
因为那张支票是我爸给的
Because my dad sent me that check,
我真是个又蠢又肥的白♥痴♥
and I'm a big, fat idiot.
好吧 这个游戏让我很激动
All right, I'm pretty fired up about this.
它在哪里 我们开始吧
Where is it? Let's go, huh?
怎么了 我买♥♥好了清单上的所有东西
What's the matter? I got everything on the list.
一个人拿齐这些很难的 怎么了
It was so hard to carry all this stuff. What?
嗨 艾比 你还好吗
Hey, Abby, you okay?
我很好 我是说 早告诉过你们了
Oh, yeah, I'm fine. I mean, I told you guys.
邮件永远不会带来什么好消息
Nothing good ever comes in the mail,
这就是证据
and this is the proof.
所以只要把这玩意儿烧了
So just gonna burn this stuff.
我觉得不行
Oh, I don't--
艾比 我们有个潜规则
Hey, Abby, we sort of have a soft rule
你发火的时候不能靠近火
about you being near fire when you're mad.
我没发疯
Oh, I'm not mad.
我只是不需要这些东西了
I just don't need any of this stuff.
预审信♥用♥卡♥ 垃圾
Pre-approved credit card? Trash.
陪审团传票 不要了
Jury summons? Nope.
别低头 别在意
Do not bend. Do not care.
房♥产税附件
Property tax document enclosed.
你不能烧这个 韦斯利·斯奈普斯
You can't burn that. Wesley Snipes!
她需要这个过程
She needs this.
我还想多烧点东西
I wanna burn more stuff.
只是个想法 但或许
Uh...just a thought, but instead maybe
你想谈谈你♥爸♥吗
you want to talk about your dad?
我是说 这是典型的艾比拉多
I mean, this is classic Abelardo.
他做事或是说话时
He does something or says something
你总是真心希望他是认真的
and you really hope he means it,
但他永远不会 每次事情发生之后
but he never does. And every time it happens,
你发现原来自己才是傻的那个
you realize you're the stupid one
因为你还相信他已经变好了
for thinking that he might have changed.
他做的每件事就像一张被退回的支票
Everything he does is a check that bounces,
我需要学会的只有别再兑现罢了
and I just need to learn to stop cashing them.
我很抱歉之前还在埋怨我父母
I'm sorry I complained about my parents earlier.
他们并不讨厌
They're not annoying.
但是我爸关于汤的那件事
But my dad this thing with soup that--
算了吧
forget it, yeah.
现在还是说你的事吧 我的或许不用再说了
Your thing now. My thing probably never.
我突然对爆米狗机很感兴趣
I just got excited about a PopDog.
我以前从没拥有过爆米狗机
I never had a PopDog in my life,
我觉得有个爆米狗机应该会很酷
and I thought having a PopDog might be kind of cool.
艾比
Hey, Abby.
我们不是总能得到应得的爆米狗机
We don't always get the PopDog we deserve,
但这不代表你现在不该拥有
but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have one now, so...
谁愿意给艾比买♥♥一个爆米狗机
Who wants to get Abby a PopDog?
算我一个
I'm in.
我觉得她就算没有爆米狗机
I think she's been doing very well this whole time
也能一直做得很好
without a PopDog,
但如果她想要一台 我支持
but if she wants one, I'm in.
现在这整件事让我想要回我的爆米狗机
This whole thing is making me want to call my PopDog right now.
丹 我们在众筹 伙计
Dan, we're putting in money, man.
你在搞什么
What the hell?
非常抱歉 给你
I am so sorry. Yeah, here you go.
拿走 全部拿走
Take it. Take it all.
说真的 我能留五美元打的回家吗
Actually, can I keep a 5.00 for a taxi ride home?
-不行 -你说得对 我走回家好了
- No. - You're right. I'll walk.
谢谢 各位
Thanks, guys.
这对我来说意义重大
This means a lot.
这些好像只有35美元
That's only like $35.
我还以为只要象征性给点就好了
I thought this was mostly symbolic.
这是你要的房♥产税附件
Hey. So here's that tax thing you wanted.
大部分都烧焦了 但你仍然可以
It's mostly scorched, but you can still kind of
差不多找到你想去那个地方的地址
sort of make out the address of the place
排队等候 然后另寻别路
you're gonna have to go wait in line and get a new one.
听我说 艾比 我很抱歉
Look, Abby, I'm sorry that
逼你重新联♥系♥你♥爸♥
I pushed you to reconnect with your dad.
我一开始就该别管这事
I should have just stayed out of it.
没事 我知道你是好心
It's okay. Your heart was in the right place.
看看我们得到了什么
And look what we got out of it.
我是说 她太美了
I mean, she is gorgeous.
好了 够了 它是个男孩
Okay, enough, he's a boy.
船模是女孩 爆米狗机是男孩
Boats are girls, PopDogs are boys.
我不想再争论这个问题了
I'm not having this argument again.
詹姆斯 它是个美丽的机器
Well, James, he's a thing of beauty.
是啊 这是你在成为第一个
Yeah, that's what you think
清洗它的人之前的想法
until you're the first person who has to clean it.
没错 就像我的孩子们想养狗的时候
Ech. Yep. It's like when my kids wanted to get a dog.
我说 「好的 只要你们照顾好它
I said, "Okay, as long as you take care of it.
我可不负责管它死活」
I'm not gonna be responsible for keeping it alive."
贝丝 你没养狗
Beth, you don't have a dog.
-看来吸取教训了 -什么
- Consider that lesson learned. - What?
我的天 我没让那只狗等死
Oh, God. I didn't let the dog die.
它现在住在农场
He's living on a farm now.
是真的农场
Oh... It's a real farm.
它又没死 各位
He's not dead, you guys.
我又不是怪物
I'm not monster.
我们还在等什么
Well, what are we waiting for?
不妨把它开起来
Might as well fire it up.
我们的神奇机器有点吵
Our miracle machine is a little loud.
没错 这说得通
Yeah, well, that makes sense.
大概是因为 从工程学的角度来说
It's probably because, in engineering terms,
烤架内的摩擦系数
the coefficient of friction inside the rotisserie
非常之高
is very high.