工作狂（2011）
Workaholics S03E04
Part 1
June 28, 2021, 1:41 p.m.
这次的夏季狂欢派对应该会像
Man, this summer kickoff party's gonna be, like,
MTV海景别♥墅♥的活动录像回放
MTV Beach House throwback status.
Daisy Fuentes的屁♥股♥蛋子肯定又要在风中飘扬咯
Daisy Fuentes's butt-cheeks are just gonna be flowing in the wind.
啊耶耶耶耶耶耶耶
Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay!
这不是种族歧视吧 - 你学的挺像
That wasn't racist, was it? - She had s--that's a good one.
有点 - 好吧
It was a little. - Okay, well.
是有点种族歧视 - 嗨 Blaze 这是Dirk
It was a little racist. - Hey, uh, Dirk to Blaze.
找出来堵着排水口的东西了吗 兄弟
Any sign of what's clogging the drain, my main man?
没有
Negative, dude.
不过我倒是看到了个烤肉架
I do see a barbeque down here, though,
还有你的一箱子衣服
and a suitcase full of your clothes.
我快到排水口了 还差两米
I'm almost to the drain. It's 2 meters.
你那空气质量如何
How's the air quality down there?
还行吧 凑合
It's okay, it's all right.
但是我需要一些大♥麻♥烟 长官
But I could use a blow of the dro, sir.
吹大♥麻♥烟
Blowing dro.
他在吹大♥麻♥烟了 完毕
He's blowing dro now. Over.
我刚刚吹了大♥麻♥烟 大♥麻♥烟
I just blew the dro. Blew the dro.
Blaze别闹了
Hey, Blaze, come on, man.
找到是什么堵着排水口了吗
Any sign of what's clogging the drain?
已确认 这里有个
That's affirmative. There's something...
我 的 天 大伙
Oh, my God, guys!
你们一定不会相信的
You're not gonna believe this.
绅士伙计们 你面前的是一头猛兽
Gentledudes, before you lies a fierce beast
它以吸食人类和山羊的脑子闻名
known to suck the brains out of humans and goats,
在98年牧场花♥园♥卖♥♥场兴建时
driven from their habitat during the construction
被赶出了自己的栖息地
of the Rancho Garden Mall in '98.
天 科学家还以为它们北迁了
Heck, the scientists thought they moved up north.
不过我有另一个的猜想
But I had a different hypothesis.
看起来我猜对了
Looks like I was right.
我认为这是 牧场嗜血怪
I give you... The Rancho Chupacabraj.
那绝对是咱们邻居Mark家的小狗Ambush
No, that is definitely our neighbor Mark's dog Ambush.
包裹在你的毛发 或许是精♥液♥中
Covered in some of your hair and possibly jizz.
不是我的精♥液♥哦
Not mine, though.
这就是嗜血怪
It's a Chupacabraj.
你居然真的带着个死掉的动物到处跑
I can't believe you're carrying around a dead animal.
我可不能把这贵重的工艺品放在家里
Well, I can't just leave this priceless artifact at home.
万一尼古拉斯凯奇穿街走巷
What would happen if, like, Nicolas Cage
偷走国宝的事情发生了 该怎么办啊
rolls through the neighborhood and steals some national treasure
随便吧 - 咱们以任务为重 小伙伴们
Whatever. - Let's stick to the mission, stromies.
我们需要些戏水玩具 - 对
We need some, like, pool toys. - Yes.
妞们就像猫咪一样
Chicks are like cats, dude.
如果你不吸引住她们的注意力
If you don't keep their attention,
她们可是待在 在冰箱顶上等着的
they'll wait for--on-- on top of the refrigerator.
没错 - 先生们 欢迎莅临
Yep. - Welcome, gentlemen,
Tez的夏日狂欢大特卖♥♥
to Tez's summer blowout special.
一切应有尽有 DC游戏
I got everything you need. Games for the Dreamcast,
PS1游戏 和免费的索尼
Playstation One, and free smoovies.
白人都爱死索尼了
'Cause white folks love smoovies.
索尼 - 没错就是它
Smoovies? - That's what I said.
索尼 - 你确定不是"雪泥"
Smoovies. - With a "V"?
就是索尼 等下 你们想要什么
Smoovies! Wait, what do y'all want?
我们其实想要些戏水玩具
We're actually looking for pool toys and whatnot
和一些其他有的没的
and what have you.
戏水玩具 来查一下我的清单 你猜怎么着
Pool toys. Let me check my inven-- you know what?
小哥你们想不想要几顶稻草牛仔帽
Can I interest you boys in some straw cowboy hats?
棒棒的呀
Oh, that's a great idea.
只要妞们带上稻草牛仔帽
Whenever chicks wear straw cowboy hats,
就变成发♥情♥期的牲口 而且牛仔妹的屁屁
they turn into sex cattle, man. And cowgirl butts...
让我不禁裤裆发胀啊 - 嗯哼
Just get my thing hard. - Mm-hmm.
能让我们看看你这里的泳池设施吗
Could you just show us to the pool supplies?
好吧 在这边
All right, it's over this way, and--
Waymond 那玩意你要是碰了就得买♥♥
Waymond, you touch it, you bought it.
搞什么
Come on.
他有<空中大灌篮>的原声碟
He has the Space Jam soundtrack.
哇 哥几个瞧瞧这个
Whoa, dudes, check this out.
我靠
Damn!
爽啊 - 天啊
Aw, yeah. - What?
那是"空霸气垫船"
That's the hover beast hovercraft.
那是Colleen在热带比基尼大赛上赢的
Colleen won that in a tropicana bikini contest.
150马力引擎 四叶曲速螺旋桨
150 horsepower engine. Four-blade warp drive prop.
给500大洋就归你了 - 天哪
And it's all yours for $500. - Dude.
如果把这东西搞定 咱们的狂欢派对
If we get this thing, man, it'll vault our party
就能变成这个夏天牛逼爆棚的大盛典
into the most awesomest maximus event of the summer.
凉到脑子了 - 我在你们的邀请之列吗
Ah, brain freeze. - Montez Walker on the invite list?
没戏 如果我给你两百 行不
Never. How about I give you $200?
这个一会再说
Yeah I'll talk about that.
不行不行 我们不能花这么多钱
No, no, no, no, no. We can't spend that much money,
否则之后我们就没钱买♥♥牛仔帽了
because then we won't have enough money for the cowboy hats,
而且如果我们没有了牛仔帽
and if we don't have cowboy hats,
那我还怎么骑着牛仔妹 拯救小马呢
how am I gonna save a horse, ride a cowgirl?
我们如果有气垫船 就不用牛仔帽了
If we have a hovercraft, we don't need cowboy hats.
没错 - 气垫船可催情了
Yeah. - Hovercrafts are aphrodisiacs.
它们简直就是 海中的牡蛎
They're basically... oysters of the ocean.
美味哦
Yummy.
恩你说的没错 而且你猜怎么着
Yeah, I guess you're right. Plus, you know what?
我们可以让人交钱坐气垫船
We could charge people money to ride on the hovercraft
还能让他们交钱跟嗜血怪合影
and also money to take pictures with the Chupacabraj.
这样我们就是在赚钱了
At this point now, we're making money.
我们是在用派对赚钱啊
We're making money off our party.
我们可以把它买♥♥回去 下周再退回来呀
Guys, we could just buy it and return it next week.
啊 啊 啊 啊 啊 我可都听见了
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. I heard that.
恕不退款
No refunds around here.
都是一锤子买♥♥卖♥♥ - 他怎么听见的
All sales final. - How did he hear that?
450大洋 而且你得给我所有
$450, plus you throw in
我们要的牛仔帽 咱就成交
all the straw cowboy hats we can need, and that's a deal.
还有一胳膊距离内的任何东西
And whatever's in arm's reach.
还有这个 这套西服 - 哇 帅
And this--this suit. - Whoa, cool!
成交 - 好嘞
Sold! - Okay!
赞 - 不过你穿着的时候小心点
Yes! - But you be careful in that suit.
它非常强大 能让女人都
It's powerful. It makes women just... .
她们都
They just
Waymond 过来给照张和咱在
Waymond! Get over here and get a sendoff picture
二手车市场时一样的照片 - 就这样
like we at the Saturn dealer. - There we go.
不错 - 一锤子买♥♥卖♥♥哟
All right. - Charge that to the game.
赞
Cool.
来吧 Ders 把小家伙打着火来
All right, Ders, fire this puppy up.
呜哦 - 来啦
Whoo! - You got it!
来吧
Here we go.
冲啊 - 呀嗨
Land-ho! - Ahoy!
喔 船长 我们要沉了
Oh, captain, this is going down!
我不喜欢你妈来看我
I don't like when your mom visits.
她老想和我调情
She's always flirting with me.
她的奶♥子♥就和你的一样大
She's got those big titties like you.
有种别卖♥♥ - 这他妈是闹什么鬼
No sale! - What in the is going--
我们得要回那450块钱了
We want our $450 back,
因为你卖♥♥给我们的气垫船
because the hovercraft you sold us
太容易打"着火"了
catches fire way too easily.
跟你们说了恕不退款
I told y'all no refunds.
对不对呀小way way
Ain't that right, way-way?
他可听见了 - 我们不是要退款
He heard me. - We don't want refunds.
我们不过是想把钱要回来再买♥♥个
We want our money back so we can buy a hovercraft
真的能"飞"的气垫船而已
that actually flies.
嗯哼 - 飞在水上
Mm-hmm. - In the water.
水 水上漂 - 嗯哼
Wat--water flight. - Mm-hmm.
没错 我们的泳池派对已经玩完了
Yeah, that's right. Our pool party's ruined.
就剩下哥几个带着牛仔帽
Now it's just guys with cowboy hats
互相对射了 怂爆了好吗
squirting each other. That's bad.
所以呢 - 所以
And? - Well...
我们要告你 把你告得倾家荡产
We'll sue you. We'll take everything you've got.
工作狂（2011）
Workaholics
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