和平使者（2022）

还记得你拿电击枪 狂电我几百上千次的事吗
Remember that time you tasered me, like... a thousand times?
记得
Yeah.
对不起
Sorry.
不 我不需要一根线
No. I don't want a piece of string.
我要一截线头干什么
You thought I wanted a piece of string?
我要你去收拾他们 别让他们回来把我们一锅端了
No, I wanted you to beat those guys up so they don't kill all of us.
你给我找把刀来也行
Maybe you could get me a knife.
鹰鹰 你真是太他妈自私了
You are unbelievably fucking selfish, Eagly.
这世界究竟是怎么回事
What the hell is up with this place?
我就出来散个步...
I just went on a walk and...
在这个世界 纳粹赢了二战
Nazis won World War II here.
我读过书架上的历史书
I've been reading all the history books on the bookshelf.
这里的少数族裔是最惨的
You don't want to be a minority here.
不能当同性恋 佛教♥徒♥也不行
Or gay. Or Buddhist. Or...
基本全是针对我的
anything I am, really.
而且这世界出品的奇多零食 跟我们的没法比
And, also, Cheetos with an H on the end... aren't nearly as good.
耶稣基♥督♥ - 这位在这倒是受欢迎
Jesus Christ. - Him, they love.
那我们现在该怎么办
So, what the fuck do we do now?
等天黑 想办法溜回那所大宅
Wait for nightfall, then we try to sneak back to the mansion,
找到你的同伙 赶紧逃离这个操蛋的维度
find your friends, and get out of this fucked-up dimension.
说得对
Yeah.
玩拼字游戏吗
You play Scrabble?
在这里叫“拼记游戏”
It's called Scrobble here.
真够扯的 - 就没有一样是正常的
That's random. - None of this shit makes sense.
(艾弗格林警局)
警♥察♥ - 不许动
Police! - Freeze!
不许动 - 站住
Don't move! - Stop!
给我站住
Hold it right there!
趴在地上
Get on the ground!
你们两个想活命的话就立刻跟我们走
The two of you want to live, you come with us now.
是他吗
That the guy?
路瑟说是他
Luthor says that's the guy.
西德尼哈珀森
Sydney Happersen.
麻省理工的超级天才 写了一本关于维度互联的专著
MIT super genius. Literally wrote the book on dimensional interconnectivity.
后来他抛下一切 来和路瑟一起工作
Then he threw it all away to come work with Luthor.
这里就是当年雷克斯路瑟 大战超人时用的通讯中心
So, this is Lex Luthor's communications hub, where he fought Superman?
是的 这是我曾经的工位
Yeah. This was my bay.
这还有电力吗
We got juice in here?
已接上电源 随时能启动 - 好
We're plugged in and ready to go.
那么...
Okay. So...
你们想让我找裂缝
you want me to find rifts?
是的
That's right.
路瑟说你能用这宝贝 扫描和追踪维度传送门
Luthor said you could scan and track down dimensional portals with this baby.
传送门 - 是的
Portals? - Yeah.
大概能行吧
Yeah, probably.
很好 - 好
Good. - Okay.
可我凭什么帮你们
Well, why should I?
什么
What?
能给我减刑之类的吗
Do I get, like, time off my sentence or something?
不能
No.
那我也不是存心找茬 只是...
Well, then... I don't mean to be antagonistic, but...
我帮你们的理由是什么
what's my reason for helping you?
我也不知道 哈珀森
I don't know, Happersen.
路瑟只说吩咐一声你就会照做
Luthor said tell him just to do it, and you would do it.
我也可以转告他 他的得力助手让他失望了
I can go back and tell him that his boy let him down.
不用了
No.
我就随便问问
I was just asking.
有需要扫描的特定区域吗
Was there some particular area you wanted me to scan?
先从华盛顿州开始 再逐步扩大
Start with Washington State. Go from there.
好
Okay.
那里
There.
那里什么 - 有信♥号♥♥了
There what? - I have a ping.
华盛顿州 艾弗格林
Washington State in... Evergreen.
那是个开启状态的传送门
That is an open portal.
天啊
Holy shit.
这个不是我们的技术
And it's not our tech.
完全不同
It's different.
我们的技术始终有波动
Ours always had a... wobble.
波动
A wobble?
连接不稳定
An unstable connection.
开启后保持不了几分钟
We could never keep it open for more than a few minutes
就会堆积维度碎片 然后崩塌
without it collecting dimensional detritus and eventually collapsing.
但这个看起来很稳定
But this one, it seems secure.
太好了
Fuck, yes.
笑脸哥 打印坐标交给弗勒里 叫他立刻赶到那个位置
Smiley, get a printout of this to Fleury. Tell him to hurry to that location.
快去 - 遵命 长官
Go. - Yes, sir.
干得漂亮 哈珀森
Good fucking job, Happersen.
谢谢 - 我或许会把你留在身边
Thank you. - I may keep you around.
也许这次终于能抓住这个混♥蛋♥了
Think we've finally got this fucker.
(蓝调)
如果琪亚不能接受我的梦想
Yeah, so if Keeya can't accept my dreams,
那她算哪门子的伴侣 是吧
I don't know what kind of partner that is, right?
她让我好压抑
She's crushing me, man.
也许是你无法接受她的梦想
Maybe you can't accept her dreams.
什么
What?
你说她的梦想是和你一起开宠物店
You said her dream was for the two of you to own a pet store.
你能接受吗
Can you accept that?
到底是谁让谁压抑
So, who's crushing who?
克里斯居然觉得这是个美好世界
I can't believe Chris thought this was the good dimension.
对他那种人♥渣♥来说可能是的
For that piece of shit, maybe it is.
他不是人♥渣♥
He ain't a piece of shit.
极端爱国主义的垃圾人
Jingoistic garbage person
音乐品味堪比 “玩具总动员”里的邻家男孩
with the musical taste of the next-door boy from Toy Story.
听着 里普
Listen, listen, Rip.
我一开始也很嫌弃他的音乐品味
I thought the same thing about his musical taste at first,
但你听过河内摇滚吗 - 没有
but you ever listen to Hanoi Rocks? - No.
伙计 他们真的很棒
Man, they're pretty incredible.
还有残酷意图乐队
"Cruel Intentions."
硬核巨星乐队
"Hardcore Superstar."
他让我喜欢上了很多超棒的东西
He turned me onto a lot of beautiful stuff.
只要稍微敞开心扉 忽略那些俗气的部分
I just had to open my mind up a little and get past the parts that were cheesy.
克里斯就是这样的人
But that's what Chris is like.
你只需稍微敞开心扉 忽略他身上俗气的部分
You just got to open your mind up a little and get past the parts that are cheesy.
就会发现他...
And then you find he's about...
其实是天底下最暖心的男人
about the sweetest guy there is.
而且他是我最好的朋友
And, you know, he's my best friend,
所以我没法坐在这听你一个劲诋毁他
so... I can't just sit here and let you malign him,
即使你救了我的命也不行
even though you saved my life.
要是他真那么好 为什么会跑来纳粹世界鬼混
If he's so awesome, why'd he move to Nazi world?
我没说他聪明
I didn't say he was smart.
我敢说他压根没发现
I'm sure he didn't even notice.
可悲的是 我不确定这个纳粹世界
The sad part is, I'm not so sure
和我们自己的世界有多大的区别
this Nazi world is as different from our own world as we wish it was.
大实话
Damn straight.
早知道你这么酷 我绝不会拿电击枪电你
Man, if I would have known you was this cool, I never would have tasered you.
别再转移话题了 反正我这局已经
Quit trying to change the subject from me winning this game
赢你一大截了
by a lot.
该死
Fuck.
我玩拼记游戏太菜了
I suck at Scrobble.
天黑了
Darkness is here.
准备好了吗
You ready?
哥们 对不起 他先拿刀扎我的手
Dude, I'm sorry he fucking stabbed me in my hand.
不对 我不认识这两个人
I mean, wait, I don't know who these people are.
这女的是谁
Who's that girl?
他穿的什么怪衣服 我都没见过
What's this weird costume he's wearing? I'm unfamiliar with it.
补救得漂亮 约翰 - 烦死了
Good save, John. - Fuck.
行了 你们说说吧 到底怎么回事
All right, you. What the fuck is going on here?
姑娘 我知道你在往哪瞄
Girl, I see where you're looking.
听说你身手不错 但你没机会
I heard you got moves, but you ain't got that.
是吗 - 是的
You think? - I think.
放他们走 这件事跟他们无关
Hey, just let them go. They have nothing to do with this.