和平使者（2022）

I'm suddenly getting afraid he choked on his own vomit in there.
见鬼 你怎么不早说
Fuck! Why are you just telling me this now?
你为什么要接他的话 - 我的错
Why are you encouraging him? - I'm sorry.
一不小心 掉进艾德里安的精神黑洞里了
I fell face-first in the Adrian vortex.
你干什么 - 看看你还活着吗
Whoa, what are you doing? - I'm making sure you're alive.
干嘛把手指塞我嘴里 - 给你扣呕吐物
Why are your fingers in my mouth? - I'm checking for throw-up.
我的耶稣基♥督♥ 够了
Jesus Christ, dude!
等等 你和克里斯到底有没有事
Wait, wait, wait. So, did something happen between Chris and you, or no?
什么都没有 我要去晒太阳 你来吗
Nothing happened. I'm gonna get some sun. You coming?
想考考我关于蜘蛛的知识吗
Want to quiz me on some spider facts?
(天眼会)
我找艾米莉亚哈考特
I'm here to see Emilia Harcourt.
史密斯先生
Mr. Smith!
真高兴见到你
So good to see you.
你好吗 老伙计 很高兴又见面了
Hey, what's up, old buddy? Good to see you again too.
你可是保家卫国的英雄 - 义不容辞
You keeping our country safe, huh? - Absolutely.
格兰特先生的检查结果出来了吗
How did Mr. Grant's test turn out?
非常乐观
Very positive.
那可太糟了 - 是吧
That's terrible. - Right?
我还希望不是癌症呢
I was hoping it wasn't cancer.
请让扫描仪扫一下眼睛好吗 先生
Can you just put your eye there across from the scanner, sir?
好 没问题
Yeah, yes.
这样吗 - 非常好
Just like this? - That's perfect.
(识别中)
(克里斯史密斯)
好了
All set.
我的帅照
Picture of me.
在三楼 哈考特女士在等你
Third floor, of course. Ms. Harcourt will be waiting for you.
他说几周你们前上了派对船
He just said you guys went on a party boat a couple weeks ago,
之后你就开始玩失踪
and you kinda ghosted him after.
我没有玩失踪
I didn't ghost anyone.
发生什么事了吗 - 你说哪里
Did something happen? - Where?
派对船上 - 阿德 我说了没有
On the party boat. - No, Ads. I told you, no.
那么... - 什么
Well... - Well, what?
为什么不试试 - 开玩笑
Why not? - Are you kidding me?
认真的 克里斯挺不错 很风趣 还讲卫生
No. Chris, he's nice. He's funny. He's got splendid hygiene.
是啊 除了满家的老鹰屎
Yeah, other than the eagle shit everywhere.
除此之外 他身材超好
Other than that, he's super-yoked,
漂亮的下颌线
nice jawline,
关键是他爱你 - 闭嘴
and he's in love with you. - Shut up.
不是吗 - 他才没有
What? - He's not.
你昏迷的时候 他在你床边守了五天 艾米
He sat by your bed for five days while you were in a coma, Em.
他穿得像个小丑
He wears a fucking clown costume.
姐妹
Dude.
怎么了 - 说真的 我很爱你
What? - I'm just saying, I love you,
但你的人生是混乱的
but you're not exactly the picture of a balanced life.
好吧
All right.
初见你时我觉得你无所不能
When I first met you, I thought you had it all together.
不是说你不酷了 你依然酷得没边
And I'm not saying you don't come off cool, you do.
只是跟你混熟了以后
But since really getting to know you,
才发现你过得比谁都混乱
I realized you're more fucked up than anyone I know.
伊克诺莫斯和义警呢 - 他俩不算
Okay, Economos and Vigilante? - Well, not them,
但你绝对是辆失控的列车 - 好吧
but you're a fucking train wreck. - Okay.
那是什么
What's that?
你炸了的样子 因为你已经完全崩了
That's you exploding 'cause you're so fucked up.
我懂你意思了
Look, your point is taken,
但我和克里斯什么事也不会有
but me and Chris is not a thing.
我们永远没戏 - 他知道吗
It's never gonna be a thing. - He know that?
它开心的时候
When he gets really happy,
有一只耳朵会竖起来
he's got one ear that just, like, sticks up.
就竖起一只耳朵
Just the one ear. Thank you.
太可爱了 我想我还得 再救助七只狗狗
Cute. I think I’m going to have to rescue, like, seven more dogs.
愚蠢透顶
This is fucking stupid.
克里斯 你怎么来了 - 他妈的老天爷啊
What's going on, Chris? - Jesus fucking Christ.
你是来办公事的吗
You got, like, some business or something here?
怎么了 瑞克
What's up, Rick?
我就问问
Just asking you.
你好吗 伙计
How you doing, man?
我正要... - 克里斯
Going-- - Chris.
我只是问问他来干什么
Yeah, I was just asking him what he's doing here.
要是他有什么公务 我也该参与
If he's got, like, something official, or something I should be a part of.
不是公事 瑞克 是私事
No, Rick, it's personal.
私事 - 克里斯想聊聊 就朋友间的
Personal? - It's... friendly. Chris wanted to talk.
只是聊聊 - 对
Just wanted to talk, huh? - Yeah.
你要聊什么 伙计
Like, about what, dude?
瑞克 让我们单独聊两句好吗
Hey, Rick, will you just-- will let us talk?
当然 我不介意
Yeah. Of course. I'm cool.
你好 哈考特
Hey, Harcourt.
你好 史密斯
Oh hey, Smith.
我们现在要互称姓氏了吗
What, we're calling each other by our last names now?
不是
No,
只是开个玩笑
just being funny.
真好笑 - 抱歉
Hilarious. - Sorry.
不 该我道歉 我不是故意要跟你别扭
No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I was... I didn't mean to bust your balls.
那么...你好啊 - 你好
So, hey. - Hey.
嘿 - 嘿
Hey. - Hey.
我的天
Oh my God.
我很抱歉
I am so sorry.
他今天不该来的 - 那个大兵
He was not supposed to be in today. - The jarhead?
不知道你为什么这样叫他 他不是海军陆战队的 不是大兵
I don't know why you and Keith call him that. He's army, not Marines, so not a jarhead.
好 你说得对
Yeah. Right.
你要不介意我们出去吧 好吗
Let's just go out, okay? Is that cool?
当然 - 好的
Sure. Yeah. Yeah. - Okay.
见鬼...
Sh-- shit. Shit! Shit!
该死的 别把这东西放在拐角处
Come on. Hey, that's not supposed to be around the corner.
我告诉过你的
I-- I-- I told you that. - Whoops.
你看这...
See, this is all,
该死
shit,
...会惹大♥麻♥烦
a big problem.
很高兴你来了
Glad you came.
我也很高兴
Me too.
我们同时下去 知道这叫什么吗
We're both going down at the same time. You know what they call that?
不知道
I don't.
电梯之旅
An elevator ride.
有这说法吗 - 有些孩子会这么说
Is that what they call it? - Some of the kids do.
狼蛛有几只眼睛
How many eyes does a tarantula have?
陷阱题 眼睛当然是成对的 所以是两只
Trick question. Eyes by definition come in pairs, so two.
狼蛛有八只眼睛 - 该死
Tarantulas have eight eyes. - Shit.
你说得太自信了 吓得我又看了一眼手♥机♥
You said that so confidently, I had to actually look back at my phone.
而且眼睛不总是成对的 - 对啊
Eyes don't always come in pairs. - Right.
我忘了火星人 只有一只巨眼
I forgot about Martians, one big eye.
快问我狼蛛是不是毛茸茸的
Ask me if tarantulas are furry.
我都知道狼蛛有毛 很恶心
I already know they're furry and it's gross.
这么说有点刻薄
That's a little harsh.
(萨沙波尔多)
见鬼 - 是谁
Fuck. - Who is it?
你好
Hello?
你为什么不报告我们 史密斯有只超能力鸭子
Why didn't you tell us Smith has some kind of super-powered duck?
是异能鸭
A meta-duck.
他没有超能力鸭子 是一只普通的老鹰
He doesn't have a super-powered duck. He's got a regular eagle.
那只普通的老鹰重伤了五名特工
That regular eagle just took down five agents.
一个在重症监护室
One's in the ICU.
一个失去了一只眼睛 另一个需要做面部重建手术
Another lost an eye. Another one needs to have reconstructive facial surgery.
该死 我马上到
Fuck. Okay, I'll be right in.
快点
Make it fast.
他告诉我是鸭子
He told me duck.
他分明就是欺负我有鸟盲症 这还是人吗
What kind of man takes advantage of another man's bird blindness?
不好意思
Sorry. Excuse me. Okay.
谁打来的
Who was that?
该死的工作 我得走了
Fucking work. I gotta go.
我的裤子呢
Where the fuck are my pants?
我洗干净叠好放在厨房♥台面上了
I washed and folded them and put them on the kitchen counter.
老天 你为什么要干这种事