魔多客（2021）

还算上了武器 偷来的振金和
Even accounting for sales of weapons,
盗版复仇者玩具的销♥售♥收入
stolen Vibranium, and bootleg Avengers toys.
有些孩子喜欢猪猪侠多些
‐ Some kids prefer Spooderman.
即便如此 我们还是破产了
‐ Even so, we're bankrupt.
不可能
‐ Impossible!
特此解除你最高注册会计师
You are hereby relieved of your status as CPA Supreme,
以及活人身份
and as a living person!
别忘了 我还要帮你算个税缴纳金呢
‐ Remember, I still need to do your personal taxes.
抱歉 我以为咖啡谁都能喝呢
‐ I'm sorry, I... I thought this coffee was for everyone.
我有个非常简单的计划可以拯救先锋科技
MODOK: I have a very simple plan to save AIM.
我们要开一座爱因斯坦·罗森桥去抢劫诺克斯堡
We're going to rob Fort Knox by opening an Einstein‐Rosen bridge into the‐‐
搞毛线
What the hell?
咱们 呃 掏不起电费
‐ We, uh, couldn't pay the power bill.
竟敢如此轻视我等 必须予以适量的报复
‐ This slight against us must be properly avenged!
好吧 诺克斯堡计划照旧 但我们先得
Okay, Fort Knox is still on, but first we make the power company pay
让电力公♥司♥付出代价
for trying to make us pay‐‐
几个意思 该死的记号♥笔
What? Ugh! Damn marker!
我们的军队 用盐表示 将在博览会进行反击
...our forces, the salt, will strike back at Expo Markers Incorporated
这样我们就能回到电力公♥司♥
so we can return to getting back at the power company
这样就能抢劫诺克斯堡
and then rob Fort Knox.
这个辣酱瓶代表什么来着
‐ What was represented by the Tapatio bottle again?
什么都不代表 吃玉米煎饼用的
‐ Nothing. It's for my burrito.
白♥痴♥
‐ Moron!
你把这个组织搞到破产
You've bankrupted this organization.
先锋科技完蛋了
AIM is finished.
别担心 莫多克会搞定的
‐ Don't worry. MODOK will fix this.
莫多克会拯救所有人
MODOK will save you all.
敌袭 为我而死吧
We're under attack. Die for me!
哦 天
‐ Oh man!
安♥眠♥药♥是不是还没过劲儿啊 怎么感觉像在做梦
Did my Ambien never wear off 'cause I feel like I'm dreaming.
我 竟然见到莫多克了 来抱一个 莫多钱
Me, meeting MODOK. Bring it in for a hug, Mo'Money.
莫挨老子 社交距离懂伐
‐ Ugh, no area's more sacred than MODOK's personal space.
靠近就切了你
Prepare to suck saw!
不错 我喜欢
‐ I love it. Love it.
我是奥斯汀·范德斯莱特 在叨咕叨任职
I'm Austin Van Der Sleet. I work for GRUMBL.
科技公♥司♥
‐ The tech company?
听说你需要资金
‐ We heard you need funding.
你怎么知道的
‐ Why would‐‐ would you think that?
因为你在叨咕叨搜过
‐ Because of your GRUMBL searches.
如何使公♥司♥免于破产
"How to save company from bankruptcy,"
我的帝国正在崩溃
"My empire's crumbling,"
哦上帝 哦上帝 以及 最酷的自杀方式
"Oh God, Oh God," and "Coolest ways to commit suicide."
我们家电脑共用
‐ We share a family computer,
也许是我儿子的帝国正在崩溃
it was probably my son's empire that was crumbling.
你的聪明才智让叨咕叨印象深刻
‐ GRUMBL's so impressed with your brilliant mind
公♥司♥想通过购买♥♥先锋科技的控股权
that they want to buy a controlling stake in AIM
救它于水火
so it can continue to exist!
绝不可能
‐ Absolutely not!
- 什么 - 莫多克是他自己的主人
‐ What? ‐ MODOK is his own master!
莫多克不向任何人屈服
MODOK bows to no one!
除了炸肉排大王穆雷·戈德法布
Except for Murray Goldfarb the Schnitzel King,
他给大家供应经济实惠的扎肉排
whose heavenly schnitzel served at affordable prices
让默多克也拜倒在他裙下
brings MODOK to his knees!
如果我们不拿这钱 去哪办公呢
‐ If we're not taking this money, where are we gonna work?
好了
MODOK: All right.
我们需要拯救先锋科技的大计划
We need big ideas to save AIM.
你们是我的智多星 有什么想法
You guys are my brain trust. What've you got for me?
- 血车 - 那是啥
‐ Blood car! ‐ What's that?
- 用血当燃料的车 - 垃圾 还有什么
‐ It's a car that runs on blood. ‐ Terrible! What else?
我们看一遍华尔街狼人 然后按狼人办的去做
‐ Oh, oh! We watch Wolf of Wall Street and do what the Wolf does!
- 我都说了别说这种烂点子了 还有什么 - 你厕所坏了
‐ I said stop pitching that! What else? ‐ Your, uh, toilet's broken.
我喜欢 虽然我没懂 但我喜欢
‐ Hmm. I like it... I don't understand it, but I like it.
我还没有成年礼的衣服呢 我在找合适的布料
‐ I still don't have a bar mitzvah suit. I'm lookin' for the right fabric.
我能快速感觉一下吗
Do you mind if I have a feel real quick?
不行的 默多克之子
‐ Not at all, Son of MODOK!
卢 不要溺爱我的智囊团了
‐ Lou, stop fondling my brain trust!
老爸 你的一个傻屌♥手下把酸都撒到我男朋友身上了
‐ Dad, one of your dumbasses spilled acid all over my boyfriend.
拜托啊 酸很贵的啊
‐ Come on, guys, acid is expensive!
默多克 我能跟你说两句吗
‐ MODOK, can I talk to you for a minute?
我刚刚在门外听到了 我的想法是
I was listening at the door and, just my two cents but,
要不就放弃先锋科技吧
maybe it's time to let AIM go.
永不 默多克从不放弃
‐ Never! MODOK doesn't give up.
我的字典里可没有斯拜这俩字
Flailerg isn't even in my vocabulary.
你是想说 失败吗
‐ Were you trying to say "failure"?
是的 我已经把这个词从我的记忆库里删掉了
‐ Yes, I literally deleted it from my memory banks.
你不用担心的 我赚的够多可以养家的
‐ You don't have to worry, I'm making enough to support us.
或许是时候让我担任家庭重担了
Maybe it's my turn to take the reins.
先锋科技就是默多克 默多克就是先锋科技
‐ AIM is MODOK! MODOK is AIM!
没有了它 我都不知道我是谁了
Without it, I... I wouldn't even know who I am.
如果是这样
‐ Wow. If that's true,
那我们得认真聊一下
I think we need to have a very serious conversation
我们俩的事情了
about what that means for us.
我去开
‐ Oh, I'll get it!
希望是酷酷的邮递员
I hope it's the cool mailman.
奥斯丁 我应该把你蒸发掉呢
Austin? I should vaporize you for yo‐‐
你还抽电子烟呢 厉害啊
‐ Aww, you vape? Dope.
我正好在附近
You know, I was just in the neighborhood and‐‐
唉 算了吧
Aw, forget it.
你估计不是那种喜欢去高级米其林六星饭店
You're not the kind of guy that likes to be wined and dined
吃饭喝酒的人吧
at exclusive, six‐Michelin star restaurants.
你这边估计有很多很酷的东西 你都没办法离开呢
You probably got lots of cool stuff going on here that you'd hate to leave...
犹太国王借过一下
LOU: Jewish king coming through!
另一个厕所也坏了
‐ Now the other toilet's broken!
行 我们去吃 但我不卖♥♥我的公♥司♥哦
‐ Fine, let's go, but I'm not selling my company.
而且这口香糖我也不要吐
And I'm not spitting out this gum.
刚嚼的 还要再嚼45分钟呢
I just put it in, and it's got another 45 minutes.
口香糖要跟我的嘴巴一起享用前菜的
It shall share my mouth with the appetizers!
我最不想聊的就是叨咕叨了
‐ Look, the last thing I want to do is talk about GRUMBL,
但是叨咕叨不是故意要冒犯你的
but you see, GRUMBL never intended to offend you.
叨咕叨觉得你是天才呢
GRUMBL thinks you're a genius.
你的高科技比什么苹果 谷歌♥甚至ITT科技
Your tech's beyond anything being done at Apple, Google,
都要厉害多了
even ITT Tech,
他们那帮人还在努力提升技艺
and those guys are getting the skills they need
来促进当今的市场呢
to advance in today's marketplace!
最棒的是啊 叨咕叨完全不会干涉呢
Best of all, GRUMBL wants to be extremely hands‐off.
很简单 让我来
Easy. Let me.
然后你可以随便啥钢铁侠杀的
And let you kill all the Iron Mans you want,
只要你圣诞节给他们弄好一个新平板就可以
as long as you deliver them a hot new tablet by Christmas.
抱歉我们得在叨咕叨停一下
So sorry we had to stop by GRUMBL.
我有点工作上的事 马上回来 你随意
Quick work thang. I'll be right back. Make yourself at home.
每个抽屉里都有怪物能量饮料
There's Monster Energy drinks in literally every drawer.
不要
‐ No.
好吧 被发现了
‐ Okay, you got me.
我是你的死忠粉啊
I'm a huge fan.
这玩意陪我度过了我父母离婚呢
That toy got me through my parents' divorce.
好的 随便吧 能给我吗
‐ Yeah, great, whatever, can I have it?
这是我童年的家着火之后唯一救出来的东西了
‐ It's the only thing I salvaged from my childhood home after the fire‐‐
能不能给我
‐ Ugh, can I have it?
抱歉 这玩具对我太重要了
‐ Sorry, it means too much to me.
你可能以为今晚就是出来随意玩玩
‐ You may have thought this was just a casual night out.
但我接受你邀约的那一刻开始
But from the moment I accepted your invitation,
你就不知不觉走进了我的大脑体育馆
you unknowingly entered my cerebral gymnasium,
没有意识到你是在和意念体操大♥师♥
unaware that you were facing off on the phrenic pommel horse
加比·道格拉斯对决
with a Gabby Douglas of mental gymnastics.
我真心不知道你在说啥
‐ I honestly have no idea what you're talking about.
是个考验 你通过了
‐ It was a test. And you passed!
等等 你是说
‐ Wait. Are you saying‐‐
我允许叨咕叨投资先锋科技了
‐ I'll allow GRUMBL to invest in AIM!
想的很清楚了
Thought that was super clear.
牛逼
‐ Oh, sick!