冒牌牧师（2015）

Impastor S01E09

Part 3 March 31, 2021, 2:56 p.m.

I discovered something about you, Buddy.
我发现了你的秘密巴迪
Yeah?
哦?
You're not the man you said you were.
你表里不如一有不为人知的另一面
Okay, look, before you tell anyone--
好这样在你要公布于众之前--
You're someone who likes to takes things slowly,
你是那种喜欢循序渐进的人
and I was too forward yesterday.
而我昨天表现的太急迫了些
Forward?
急迫?
Or maybe I wasn't forward enough.
或者也许我还是步调不够快
I don't know.
我也不知道了
I thought I was seeing signs you were ready for "us,"
我以为我看到你准备好要进入“我们”阶段的迹象了
but you weren't,
但你并没有
and I know that's somehow my fault.
我知道一定是我哪里做错了
I feel horrible.
我感觉很糟
Okay, you...
好你...
stop beating up on my friend Russell.
不要再责难我的朋友拉塞尔了
Get over here.
过来
Ooh! That tickles.
呜哦! 好痒
So you're ticklish, huh? No. No.
看来你很怕痒? 不不是的
Don't lie to me, you big tickle bunny.
别骗我你就是很怕痒
Okay, please stop. I'm gonna pee.
好了别闹了我都要尿裤子了
All right, that's enough.
好吧那就这样
I got stuff to do.
我还有事要做
Buddy, you are like the instruction manual
巴迪你就像我那个日本电饭锅的
to my Japanese rice cooker--
操作说明书--
so hard to read, but so worth it.
怎么也看不懂但绝对很值
Hi, there, Hot Shoes.
嗨亲爱的热舞鞋
I was just thinking
我刚刚在想
about our lovely waltz in the park.
我们在公园里跳的迷人的华尔兹
I was wondering if--if--
我在想我们能不能--能不能--
No, if I don't see that shipment of toner
不如果明天之前我没在办公室里看见
in my office by tomorrow, the deal is off.
那批墨盒送到这笔交易就算玩儿完了
Yeah, the idiot vendors.
没错蠢货供应商
I know what's going on.
我都知道了
What are you talking about? Don't deny it.
你在说什么? 别否认了
You're spending time with her, ignoring my calls.
你老是和她在一起不接我电♥话♥
You've switched to a teeth-whitening toothpaste.
你换了美白牙膏
Don't think I haven't noticed.
别以为我不知道
Hilva Just admit it.
席尔瓦— 你就承认了吧
You're having an affair with Dora.
你有外遇了和朵拉
Dora? Or should I say Whorea?
朵拉? 我是不是应该叫她婊－砸?
Hilva, I can assure you, you are mistaken.
席尔瓦我向你保证是你误会了
Yeah, right.
喔呵呵
My toilet's clogged. Work your magic.
我的马桶堵住了该你施法了大神
Maybe I was worried over nothing.
也许我只是在庸人自扰
Maybe Barlow never put the damn passport in the jacket.
也许巴罗从来都没把那该死的护照放在夹克里
Then why did he put it on the list?
但如果是这样的话他又为什么要将这事记在单子上呢?
Oh, I know.
嗷我完全明白你的心
I hate that it ended too.
它就这样结束了我也觉得蛮烦的
You know what? I think I'm gonna make us more popcorn
你造吗? 我觉得在我们开始看续集之前
before we start the sequel.
我应该再去多弄点爆米花来
There's a sequel?
这还有续集?
How can those pants keep traveling?
这堆破裤子到底是怎么能继续旅行的?
Hey. Hey.
嘿嗨
You know those little post-its on the budget docs
你有看到贴在预算文件上那些贴着”在这签名”的
that said "sign here"?
小便利贴吗?
You were supposed to sign there.
你应该在那里签上名的
They're due first thing tomorrow.
文件明天一早就要到期了
Can you pop by real quick?
你可以赶紧过来一趟吗?
Yeah. See you in ten.
好十分钟后见
I knew Dora wasn't really in danger.
我知道朵拉并不是真的处于危险之中
And I couldn't take another magic-jeans movie.
而我也实在忍♥受不了又一部关于魔法牛仔裤的电影了
Dora, I'm gonna hit the sack, so good night!
朵拉我要睡了晚安!
You're totally safe!
你很安全!
Don't wake me up!
别叫我起床!
And then, get this, he starts tickling me.
然后呢听好了他开始挠我痒痒了
That's so weird...
好奇葩...
and hot.
但又好性感
But then he just leaves.
可是之后他就这样走了
I mean, does Buddy like me?
我说巴迪到底是喜欢我?
Does Buddy not like me?
还是不喜欢我?
IDK.
我不懂啊
I mean, we're so obviously right for each other.
我是说我们很明显是天生一对
Look.
看
Is that the floral print you've been gushing about?
那就是你一直提起的印花图案吗?
Oh.
呃
Excuse me.
抱歉打扰了
Uh, I couldn't help but overhear you talking about Buddy.
我只是无意听到你们在谈论巴迪
Pastor Buddy.
牧师巴迪
We're basically almost a couple.
我们基本上能算是一对情侣
Yeah, that's the one everyone's been talking about.
对就是这个人最近大家总是谈论他
I would love to meet him.
我很想见他
Do you know where I could find him?
你知道在哪儿能找到他吗?
Sure. He lives super close.
当然了他住得超近
I'll draw you a map.
我来为你画张地图吧
It's open.
门开着呢
Nice place.
房♥子不错
Thanks. Make yourself comfortable.
谢谢你请自便吧
Hi.
嗨
Wow.
哇
That your special document-signing dress?
这是你为了签文件而特意挑的裙子吗?
Buddy? Yeah?
巴迪? 怎么了?
From the moment we met...
从我们相遇的那一刻起...
I felt there was something special between us.
我就感觉到我们之间有着特别的羁绊
And when I saw the way you looked at me today...
而当我看到你今天看着我的眼神的时候...
So, if I could just borrow a pen...
呃我能不能先借支笔...
I know we haven't known each other very long,
我知道我们相识还不算太久
but you've already been there for me
但你总是陪在我身边
in ways that no man in my life ever has.
我生命中从未有任何男人像你一样这么做过
And I find that incredibly sexy.
我觉得这非常性感
You do?
真的?
Dora, stop it.
朵拉别乱想
It's just Buddy.
那只是巴迪在走动而已
Just follow your feelings.
你只需要跟着感觉走
What I was feeling was grateful that I had jerked off earlier
我此刻只有为今天早些时候打了飞机而感到欣慰
so this would be easier to say.
所以说出这样的话也就比较容易了
Alexa...
亚莉克莎...
you're gorgeous.
你很美
And if I wasn't gay, I would rip that dress off
如果我不是基佬的话我绝对会从你身上扯掉那条裙子
your body and lick every...
并且舔遍你的全…
But I'm gay...
但我是基佬
super gay.
基佬中的战斗机
And even though you're an amazing woman,
即使你是个妙人儿
I'm--
我——
I'm just not attracted to you.
我只是无法被你吸引
I'm sorry.
很抱歉
Okay.
好吧
I'll get you that pen.
我去拿笔给你
By the way, I found your passport.
对了我发现你的护照了
You did?
真的?
Yeah, it was in the book jacket.
嗯它在书皮里
Right...the book jacket.
对哦...书皮
You didn't...
你没有...
happen to look inside, did you?
不小心打开看一眼吧? 有吗?
Do I look like someone who would?
我看上去像是会做这种事的人吗?
A sealed envelope?
密封的信封?
Dora, thanks for hiring someone so anal.
朵拉谢谢你雇了这么个吹毛求疵的人
You really saved my ass.
你真是救了我一命
Hey, it's Russell.
嘿我是拉塞尔
I met a lady who was looking for you.
我碰到了一个在找你的女人
I gave her your address. I hope that's okay.
我把你家地址给她了我希望你不要介意