燃情克利夫兰

Hot in Cleveland S05E23

Part 1 May 4, 2020, 1:38 p.m.

《燃情克利夫兰》于摄影棚观众前现场录制
Hot in cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience.
女议员阁下您的赏光令此处蓬荜增辉
Councilwoman, you honor us with your presence.
真是疯了
This is crazy.
你不过是当选市议员而已
You won a city council post.
为什么大家都把你像教父一样供着
Why is everyone treating you like you're the godfather?
女议员阁下说你那不知羞耻暴露的双腿
The councilwoman says it would be a shame if something were
如果发生什么事的话就太可惜了
to happen to those legs you so shamelessly display.
女议员阁下
Councilwoman.
这是献给您的特制奶油煎饼卷在下妻子做的
I bring you special cannolis prepared by my wife.
你这样做挺好的
This is a nice thing you do for me.
女议员阁下在下有个请求
Councilwoman, a request.
食品检查员他们来这里给了我一个B
Food inspectors, they come here, they give me a "B."
我对员工们说为了公正
I say to my staff, for justice
我们必须找奥斯特洛夫斯基女议员阁下
we must go to councilwoman Ostrovsky.
你的未来会有个A的
I see an "A" in your future.
谢谢您女议员阁下
Thank you, councilwoman.
你怎么能让他们改这里的成绩
How are you going to get them to change the grade?
别过问我的事乔依
Don't ask me about my business, Joy.
维多利亚来了
Look, it's Victoria.
那不是奥斯卡获奖者维多利亚·蔡斯吗
Is that academy award-winner, Victoria Chase?
是的是的
It is, it is!
别这样
Oh, stop.
真是不好意思
This is so embarrassing.
表现不差但你忘了说"她真人更漂亮"
Not bad, but you forgot, "She's even more beautiful in person."
看我买♥♥到了什么
Oh, look what I got.
这是我在新奇品商店发现的假奥斯卡奖
It's a fake oscar I found at a novelty store.
我要用这个来好好琢磨下
I'm gonna use it to figure out the best place
等真的来了放在哪里展示
to display my real one when it arrives.
我看到报道说你获奖时
You know, I read that when you won,
80%的美国人认为
80% of American's thought
约翰·特拉沃尔塔读错了名字
that John Travolta read the wrong name.
我有没有说这还是一个水枪
Did I mention it's also a water pistol?
是米奇发来的
Oh, it's from Mitch.
他要离开这里几天
He's going out of town for a few days.
他说我已经想你了
It says, "I miss you already."
-你看起来很开心乔依 -是的
- You look very happy, Joy. - I am.
但我害怕到不敢相信
But I'm scared to trust it.
真是荒谬但我觉得一旦我说
It's ridiculous, but I feel like something awful will happen
我很开心我与米奇相爱着
the moment I just come out and say I'm happy,
就会有坏事发生
and I'm in love with Mitch.
我的天坏事发生了
Oh, my god! Something awful has happened!
是西蒙
It's Simon.
我已经几个月没他消息了
I haven't heard from him in months,
现在他却突然要视频聊天
and now out of the blue he wants to video chat?
我真应该现在就了结这事
Oh, I should get this over with right now
告诉他米奇的事
and tell him about Mitch.
-但不行 -为什么呢
- But I can't. - why not?
我这个样子怎么能聊视频
I can't video chat like this.
当你要告诉一个男人你不会再和他上♥床♥时
You have to look your sexiest when you're telling a man
一定要是你最性感的样子
you're never going to have sex with him again.
我可以收拾桌子了吗
Shall I clear the table?
谢谢
Oh, thank you.
我见过这个
Oh, I've seen these.
这是水枪对吗
It's a water gun, right?
放下枪
Leave the gun.
拿走奶油煎饼卷
Take the cannolis.
这个可以搞定阴影的问题
There, this will take care of the shadows.
你已经打扮好可以视频聊天了
You're all set for your video chat.
记住你的右脸是最上镜的
Just remember, your right side is your best,
永远不要让左脸出现在镜头里
Never show the left side of your face.
我的左脸怎么啦
What's wrong with my left side?
没什么很漂亮
Nothing, it's gorgeous.
-但你刚说 -梅兰妮你好
- But you just said-- - Melanie, hello!
刚刚发生了可怕的事
Something terrible just happened.
-交♥警♥给了我罚单 -什么
- A cop just gave me a ticket. - What?
我们在克利夫兰都不能靠调情躲罚单了吗
We can't flirt our way out of tickets in Cleveland?
那还住这里干嘛
Why even live here?
不是个女交♥警♥
No, it was a female cop.
爱尔卡的教父那套一直让我挥之不去
And I got caught up in the whole Elka godfather thing.
我说如果可以让罚单消失
And I said, if the ticket would somehow go away,
爱尔卡会让她升职的
that Elka would give her a promotion.
现在她要调查爱尔卡
Now she's going to investigate Elka.
你为什么这么做
Why would you do that?
我软弱我是弗雷多[《教父》里的角色]
I'm weak. I'm Fredo.
我的天
Oh, my god.
是西蒙
It's Simon.
记住你的左脸最上镜
Okay, just remember, your left side's your best side.
不对她的右脸最上镜
No, no, no, her right side is her best side.
她的左脸丑死了
Her left side is crap.
不她的右脸丑死了
No, her right side is crap.
快走
Go!
你好西蒙
Hello, simon.
你好吗
How are you?
乔依你太漂亮了
Joy, you look fantastic.
是吗
Do I?
我现在一直是这样子
This is how I look all the time now.
自打你离开后
Since you left.
为什么你的胸部在发光
Why are your breasts glowing?
这个现在也一直是这样子
That happens all the time now too.
听我说西蒙
Look, Simon--
乔依很抱歉最近没有联♥系♥你
Joy, I'm sorry I haven't been in touch lately,
但我总是在想着你
but I think about you all the time.
还有欧文和威尔伯大家都好吗
And Owen and Wilbur. How is everyone?
大家都很好
Everyone is doing great.
但我有事要告诉你
But there's something I need to tell you.
我认识了一个人而且
I've met someone, and, well...
我爱上他了
I'm in love.
西蒙
Simon?
你那边似乎挂了
You seem to have frozen.
我不知道你听到了什么
I don't know what you heard.
西蒙
Simon.
西蒙
Simon!
看仔细了
Look close.
告诉我你们的想法
Tell me what you think?
他这个表情是不是因为听到我说
Is this the face of a man who just heard me say,
我爱上了别人
"I'm in love with someone else"?
我不知道
I don't know.
但这是已经厌倦了听这事的表情
But this is the face of somebody who's tired of hearing about it.
乔依我们已经分♥析♥两天了
Joy, honey, we've been analyzing this for two days now,
在你联♥系♥上他前你不会知道他听到了什么
And, until you reach him, you're not going to know what he heard.
我觉得你应该删掉这个继续生活
I think you should just delete it and move on.
我也想但不知为什么
I want to, but for some reason
我似乎无法删掉他这张愚蠢的脸
I can't seem to delete his stupid face.
你觉得你可能还对他有感觉吗
Do you think you still might have feelings for him?
我不知道
I don't know.
希望不是
I hope not.
这事让我心里乱极了
I'm so unsettled about the whole thing.
要是米奇能回来就好了
I just wish Mitch would get back.
我知道你的感受亲爱的
Oh, I know how you feel, honey.
我也在充满希望地期待我的男人
I'm waiting and hoping for my man too.
只是奥斯卡奖不是真男人
It's an oscar, not a real man.
但他是金子做的而且不会发表意见
But he's made of gold, and he has no opinions,
所以在某种程度上他更好
So in some ways he's better.
这倒是
That's true.
乔依当我有烦心事
You know, Joy, when I'm troubled
想倾诉一下时我就去忏悔
and I want to talk things out, I go to confession.
我上次去忏悔还是西蒙让我怀孕的时候
The last time I went was when Simon got me pregnant.
我想上帝可能会喜欢这其中的讽刺
I suppose god might enjoy the irony.
可怜的乔依
Oh, poor Joy.
要是她能联♥系♥上西蒙就好了
If only there was some way she could get in touch with Simon.