燃情克利夫兰

Hot in Cleveland S05E20

Part 1 May 4, 2020, 1:38 p.m.

《燃情克利夫兰》于摄影棚观众前现场录制
Hot in cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience.
终于只有我们俩了
We're finally alone.
我等这一刻太久了
I have been wanting this for so long.
你太美了
You're amazing.
停
Cut!
肯你亲个什么劲儿啊
So, Ken, what's with all the kissing?
这是你剧本里写的
It's in your script.
是吗那现在删了
Yeah? Well, now it's out.
他们接吻完全没理由嘛
There is absolutely no reason why they should be kissing.
这是蜜月的戏
It's the honeymoon scene.
小白脸不适合这个角色
Yeah, well, loverboy here is all wrong for the part.
JJ 试镜可不是这样的
J.J., that's not how you audition people.
你要说他们有多棒
You say how wonderful they are
等他们离开后再说他们有多差
and wait until they leave before you talk about how bad they were.
他还不知道这些
This is all new to him.
我闪人了
I'm going to go.
谢谢你太棒了
Thanks. You were wonderful.
演技太差了
What a lox.
抱歉我只是太嫉妒了
Sorry. I just get so jealous.
你不必这样
Well, you shouldn't be.
我爱惨你了
I'm crazy about you.
但你必须得适应
But you're going to have to get used to it.
我是女演员
I'm an actress.
我跟许多人都拍过爱情戏
I've done love scenes with everyone
从格雷戈·金尼尔到尚格·云顿
from Greg Kinnear to Jean-Claude Van Damme.
我要请你做一些你和尚格·云顿一起时
Well, I'm going to ask you to do something you didn't do
没做过的事
with Jean-Claude Van Damme.
那可不容易
Well, that's not going to be easy.
我知道我说过想咱们慢慢来
I know I said I wanted us to take it slow,
但我想我已经准备好更进一步了
but I think I'm ready to go to the next level.
我要你见我的孩子们
I want you to meet my children.
我太乐意了
Oh, I would love that!
你一直在说他们
You've talked about them so much,
我觉得已经认识他们了
I feel I know them already.
两个孩子对吗
Two kids, right?
三个和你的一样很好记
Three. Just like you, so it's easy to remember.
那是你以为
You'd think.
我有重大事要宣布
I have a major announcement to make.
JJ要我见他的孩子们
J.J. wants me to meet his children.
这太好了
Oh, that's wonderful.
这可是一大步啊
This is a big step.
自他们母亲去世后我是他们父亲第一个约会的女人
I'm the first women he's dated since their mother died.
我的建议是弄清楚
Oh, well, my advice is to acknowledge
忌讳的问题
the elephant in the room.
他的女儿有些胖
His daughter is a little chubby.
不我说的是他的妻子
No, I was talking about his wife.
她是一年前去世的
She just died a year ago.
我相信对他们来说依然伤心
I'm sure it's still pretty raw for them.
你说的对我应该怎么做
You're right. What should I do?
让他们知道你有多钦佩她
Um, let 'em know how much you admire her
能在JJ的电影里演绎她是一种无上的荣幸
and what an honor it is to portray her in J.J.'s film.
好建议梅兰妮
That is good advice, Melanie.
我可是专业给建议的
Well, I am a professional advice giver.
事实上我的电台经理等下要与我见面
As a matter of fact, my station manager wants to meet with me later
就我的节目商讨下新点子
to go over some new ideas for the radio show.
我想我要点炸薯条让他知道我很风趣
I think I'll order french fries to let him know I'm fun.
你就是想点炸薯条对吗
You just want to order french fries, don't you?
让他知道我很风趣
To let him know I'm fun.
-你们好 -考试怎么样
- Hi. - Hey, how did the exams go?
我们不知道
We're not sure.
但如果我们没过就不能毕业
But if we don't pass, we don't graduate.
你笑什么爱尔卡
Why are you smiling, Elka?
我觉得我的口试挂科了她觉得很好笑
She's finding it very amusing that I think I failed my orals.
是我就会说她在口试时结巴了[口♥交♥时窒息]
I would have said she choked on her orals.
过去一小时她一直在说双关
It's been like this for the past hour.
如果乔依口试挂科
Well, if Joy does fail her orals,
这将很难接受[吞咽]
that would be hard to swallow.
要知道你是唯一一个
You know, you're the last person
我期待会完爆口试[口♥交♥]的人
I would expect to blow her orals.
我不应该只是临时抱佛脚地学习
I shouldn't have waited until the last minute to study.
我看你是贪大嚼不下
I guess you bit off more than you could chew.
麻烦给我瓶啤酒
I'll have a beer, please.
这里的薯条好吃吗
How are the fries here?
我不知道我不吃薯条
I don't know. I don't eat fries.
我只是点了这样我老板会觉得我风趣
I just ordered them, so my boss would think I'm fun.
你听起来风趣
Yeah, you sound fun.
有没有搞错
Oh, you got to be kidding me!
我奶奶都可以投中
Oh, my grandma could've hit that!
这白♥痴♥刚刚害我没了一千块
Idiot just cost me $1,000 bucks!
我不明白为什么男人对球赛这么激动
I don't know why guys get so worked up at these games.
他们以后还会再次比赛啊
I mean they're going to play each other again at some point.
所以我在脱衣舞俱乐部看球赛
You see, this is why I watch sports in strip clubs.
我是说
I mean,
显然那里的女人都没有你这么风趣
obviously none of the women there are as much fun as you,
但至少她们没你这么多话
but at least they talk less.
脱衣舞俱乐部太郁闷了
Strip clubs are just depressing.
是吗你去过吗
Really? Have you ever been in one?
确切来说没有
Well, you know, not techni--no.
我一周去五晚
I go five nights a week.
唯一让我郁闷的
The only thing that depresses me
就是那里不卖♥♥早餐
is that they don't serve breakfast.
你坐到别处去好吗
Oh, could you sit someplace else?
我的电台经理来了我是做电台节目的
My station manager is here. I'm on the radio.
-你好梅兰妮 -汤姆你好吗
- Hi, Melanie. - Hi, Tom. How are you?
我很好看来你们认识了
Oh, I'm great. I see you two have met.
什么你认识他吗
What? You--you know him?
梅兰妮这位是弗兰基
Melanie, this is Frankie.
我刚把他从芝加哥的CWSR挖过来的
I just lured him away from Chicago's CWSR.
我是做电台节目的
I'm on the radio.
弗兰基有一档叫做"男人区"的热门早间秀
Frankie host a popular morning show called man town.
老天
Oh, god.
这节目是不是女人上去在乳♥房♥♥上画画
Is that the show where the women go on and paint their breasts?
太丢人了
That's degrading.
哇好啦稍等一下
Whoa, okay, whoa. Hold on a second.
她们不是在乳♥房♥♥上画画
Now, they don't paint their breasts.
她们是用乳♥房♥♥画画
They paint with their breasts.
这不叫丢人这是艺术
And it wasn't degrading. It was art.
难以置信
Unbelievable.
不好意思
Excuse me.
比你的节目有意思多了
It was more interesting than your show.
老天如果我想听一个唠叨的意大利女人
I mean, jeez, if I wanted to listen to a yappy Italian woman
一整天给些无聊意见我就打电♥话♥给我姐了
give boring advice all day, I'd call any of my sisters.
你听见了吗
Are you listening to this?
我想所有克利夫兰人
Oh, I think all of Cleveland
都会想听这个
is going to want to listen to this.
我就希望能有这效果
I was hoping this would happen.
这是爆♥炸♥性午间节目中典型的两性战争
It's the classic battle of the sexes in one explosive afternoon show.
慢着你是说你想......
Wait, wait. Are you saying you want--
我和他一起共同主持吗
Want me to cohost a show with him?
我好紧张
I'm so nervous.
他们说下午三点会公布成绩
They said they'd post the grades at 3:00 P.M.
能从大学毕业是我的梦想
Finishing college was my dream.
希望这话让你好受些我知道我过了
If it makes you feel any better, I know I passed.
为什么这话会让我好受些
How is that supposed to make me feel better?
我说了"希望"
I said "If."
你为什么这么自信
How could you be so confident?
我的事我知道
I know my subject.
我甚至纠正了教科书的答案
I even corrected the textbook answer.
老天成绩出来了
Oh, my god, it's the results.
我们都挂科了
We both failed.