燃情克利夫兰

Hot in Cleveland S05E11

Part 1 May 4, 2020, 1:36 p.m.

《燃情克利夫兰》于摄影棚观众前现场录制
Hot in Cleveland is recorded in front of a live studio audience.
他们看到我们了吗
Did they see us?
是的爱人
Yes, lover.
他们听不到你不必叫我爱人
They can't hear us. You don't need to call me lover.
卧底工作就是这样的乔依
It's called undercover work, Joy.
我们追查的是身份窃贼
We're chasing identity thieves here,
狡猾多疑
crafty and suspicious.
如果我们要接近他们就得令他们相信
If we want to get close to them, we have to convince them
我们只是普通的夫妇
we're just an ordinary couple.
明白
Got it.
但我们不能假戏真做
Now, we mustn't get too attached, you and I.
那样只会带来心碎
That will only lead to heartbreak.
你心碎
Your heartbreak.
好了我们去接近疑犯
All right, let's engage the suspects.
慢着我们的卧底说辞是什么
Wait. What's our cover story?
配合我就行
Just follow my lead.
打扰下
Excuse us.
你们住在松树汽车旅馆吗
Are you staying at the pines motel?
你是谁
Who's asking?
我是约翰约翰·约翰逊
Oh, John. John...Johnson.
我老婆和我认出你了
My wife and I recognized you.
你们的房♥间就在我们隔壁
You're staying in the room next door to ours.
我们在度蜜月
We're on our honeymoon.
住在松树汽车旅馆吗
At the pines motel?
原来的计划是去迪士尼乐园但买♥♥老婆时
The original plan was Disney, but I went over budget
我超了预算
buying my wife.
她是俄♥国♥邮购新娘
You see, she's a Russian mail-order bride.
打个招呼吧她叫...
Say hello to...
娜塔莎谢谢
Natasha. Thanks.
我是朱莉这是我老公本尼
I'm Julie, and this is my husband, Benny.
你们等下想在旅馆碰头
Say, would you guys like to meet us back at the motel
喝杯小酒吗
for a nightcap?
这样好吗
I don't know.
我真的想就我们房♥间传出的噪音
Oh, I'd really like to apologize for all the noise
向你们道歉
coming from our room.
你买♥♥新娘的时候
You know, when you buy a bride,
人家可不会告诉你她是个叫♥床♥高手
they don't tell you if she's a screamer.
我不知道该怎么做
Oh, I just don't know what to do.
我的经纪人告诉我得找一个
My agent told me I've got to find
没有争议性不得罪任何人
a non-controversial, inoffensive,
感人的事情
heart-warming cause
来帮助提升获得奥斯卡提名的机会
to help my chances of getting an Oscar nomination.
因为仅有才华是不够的
'Cause talent just isn't enough.
这对你来说太幸运了
Well, that's lucky for you.
给我的高杯白俄鸡尾酒加点糖如何[亲亲]
How about some sugar for my tall glass of white Russian?
你确定需要这些卡路里吗
You sure you need the calories?
我猜肯定有什么猫腻
I'm guessing there's a story there.
-旅馆见了 -好的
- See you back at the motel. - Okay.
俄♥国♥邮购新娘
Russian mail-order bride?
奇怪的小细节
It's the odd little details
反而不会让人有什么疑心
that make it seem less suspicious.
我们旅馆见
I'll meet you at the motel.
告诉你一下约翰·约翰逊是裸睡的
But just so you know, John Johnson sleeps in the nude.
告诉你一下
And just so you know,
娜塔莎·约翰逊是拿着剪刀睡觉的
Natasha Johnson sleeps with scissors.
那就穿睡衣吧
Pajamas it is, then.
好激动啊
This is so exciting.
鲍勃和我在为警方做卧底
Bob and I are doing undercover work for the police.
各位抱歉我迟到了
Hi, guys. I'm sorry I'm late.
我得和新的电台经理开会
I had to meet with the new station manager.
没想到他超爱炒作
Turns out he's big on publicity stunts.
我告诉他我不炒作
I told him, "I don't do stunts."
好样的他说什么
Good for you. What did he say?
他说你可能去另一家电台会更开心
He said, "you might be happier at another station."
我的炒作方式就是将我的节目"问问梅兰妮"
So, my stunt is doing my show, ask Melanie,
从今晚开始连续播出24小时
for 24 hours straight, starting tonight.
特辑叫做"对你问不完"
It's called askageddon.
好可怕的名字
That's a terrible name.
你的电台经理是个白♥痴♥
Your station manager is an idiot.
名字是我想的
I came up with that name.
没错他是个白♥痴♥
And yes, he is an idiot.
他说我听起来太洛杉矶味儿了
Because he said I sound too L.A.
我需要更亲民一些
I need to be more folksy?
要像甜心波波沼泽人类[都是真人秀节目]
Like--like honey boo boo, swamp people.
我甚至不知道是什么意思
I don't even know what that means.
不要啊他要关闭狗狗公园
Oh, no. He's closing the dog parks.
谁啊你在说什么
Who? What are you talking about?
那个笨蛋议员吉姆·鲍威尔
Oh, this stupid councilman, Jim Powell,
他说维护狗狗公园花费高
he says that dog parks are too expensive and too noisy
而且好吵
to maintain.
乔依也一样但我们不会甩掉她啊
So is Joy, but we don't get rid of her.
当然了我们要甩掉的是鲍威尔议员
Of course, what we should get rid of is councilman Powell.
那只能祝好运了
Yeah, well, good luck with that.
他会再次参选而且没对手
He's up for reelection and he's running unopposed.
不他有了
No, he's not.
这是完美的不得罪任何人事件
This is the perfect non-offensive cause
来为我的奥斯卡助阵
for my Oscar bid.
狗狗公园
Dog's parks.
好莱坞女演员对抗官僚
Hollywood actress fights city hall.
好的我会这么做
Okay, I'll do it.
你是说要竞选市议员吗
Are you saying you're running for city council?
你对政♥治♥一窍不通
You don't know anything about politics.
桑尼·波诺又知道什么
Well, what did Sonny Bono know?
克林特·伊斯特伍德呢
Clint Eastwood?
施瓦辛格连州的名字都发音不对
Schwarzenegger couldn't even pronounce the name of the state.
他不也竞选了
He ran.
我真希望我也嫁了个好男人像你的约翰那样的
I wish I'd married a nice guy, like your John.
他对你好细心好甜蜜
He's so attentive and sweet to you.
我总是喜欢坏男人
I've always been attracted to bad boys.
坏男人坏男人女人能怎么办
Aw, bad boys, bad boys, what you gonna do?
你们去做什么了
What were you two up to?
抽些廉价雪茄增进下友谊
Just bonding over some primo stogies.
就是做个爷们
You know, being men.
娜塔莎送给你
Natasha, this is for you.
我吐在灌木丛里时看到的
I spotted it while I was throwing up in the bushes.
本尼我以为你会戒烟的
Benny, I thought you were going to stop smoking.
我还以为你会一直辣得冒烟呢
And I thought you were going to stay smoking.
别这样本尼这不是你的真心话
Now, now, Benny, I don't think you mean that.
我想我们都非常幸运
I think we've both been fortunate enough
能够分别抱得两位美人归
to land two very beautiful ladies.
而且你的老婆还不是花钱买♥♥来的
And you didn't even have to pay for yours.
吃了没伙计们
Well, howdy, folks.
我是梅兰妮·莫雷蒂
This is Melanie Moretti,
感谢大家愿意花上24小时
and I thank you for kinda dropping in for 24 hours
听些淳朴建议以及友好扯淡
of homespun advice and friendly chit-chat.
俺也想接听众来电但是
Now, I'm fixin' to take some calls, but...
俺滴娘亲看谁来了
Bless my corns! Look who's here.
欢迎我的好闺蜜
Please welcome my good buddies,
爱尔卡和维多利亚
Elka and Victoria.
你俩快进来坐下开始水吧
Y'all come in and sit and spill.
你要是中风了就眨眨眼
Blink if you're having a stroke.
我这是亲民
I'm being folksy.
你们怎么来了
So, what brings you two to these parts?
克利夫兰的听众们好维多利亚·蔡斯来了
Hello, Cleveland, Victoria Chase here.
没错就是那个维多利亚·蔡斯
Yes, that Victoria Chase.
我来这里
I'm here
宣布我要参加国会选举
to announce my candidacy for congress.
市议会
City council.
-不一样吗 -老天爷
- Is that different? - Oh, brother.
大家可能认为我是一位著名女演员
You may think of me as a famous actress