乔治和曼迪的头婚生活（2024）

Georgie & Mandy's First Marriage S01E10

Part 3 March 11, 2025, 8:03 p.m.

You gonna watch the whole show?
我一般看完主持人独白之后就会睡
Uh, normally, I'd go to sleep after the monologue,
美国脱口秀演员艺名辛巴达原名大卫·阿特金斯
但是辛巴达的节目开始了
but Sinbad's on.
杰你是最棒的
Oh, Jay, you're the best.
看看我带谁来了
Look who I brought!
我最喜欢的女孩
Oh, there's my favorite girl!
你这话我就不和米希说了
I won't tell Missy.
她文身之后都排不进我喜爱的女孩榜前3了
After the tattoo, she's not even top three.
我想着你喜欢和宝宝一起待着
I thought you might like a little baby time.
我是喜欢 -但首先...
I would. -But first...
我需要你和奥德丽重归于好
...I need you to fix this mess with Audrey.
修复这段关系的责任不在我
I'm not the one who needs to fix it.
她上次来尝试过与你和好结果不怎么样
Last time she tried, didn't go so great.
那是她的错 -我不管是谁的错
That's her fault. -I don't care.
你们俩必须停止争吵
You two fighting's got to stop.
我们俩的事和你没关系
This has nothing to do with you.
怎么没关系了
Yes, it does.
就因为你们我昨晚都睡沙发了
I'm sleeping on the couch 'cause of y'all.
我凌晨1点醒来
I woke up at, like, 1:00 in the morning,
柯南·奥布莱恩美国脱口秀主持人
著名节目有《柯南·奥布莱恩深夜脱口秀》
电视上在播柯南的节目这人够奇怪的
some weird guy named "Conan" was on TV.
我不需要你来维护我
I do not need you sticking up for me.
我才没呢我支持奥德丽
I wasn't. I was on Audrey's side.
你竟然站她那一边
I can't believe you were on her side!
你刚刚还因为我维护你而生气呢
You were just mad at me for being on your side!
我现在不生气了啊你跟上我节奏啊
Now I'm not! Keep up!
两位库珀家的
Coopers.
我在隔壁想不听到你们吵架也难
Couldn't help overhear the bickering
我想着也许我可以帮忙调解
and thought perhaps I could put on my counseling hat.
我刚刚被我的亲生儿子背叛了
I was just betrayed by my own son.
我才没背叛你呢 -你这个犹大
I didn't betray you. -Judas!
玛丽你这样说有点过分了
Mary, that's a little rough.
圣经故事约拿被鲸鱼吞下又被吐出
我怎么就像那个被吞进鲸鱼肚子里的家伙了
How am I like the guy who ended up in the whale?
你说的是约拿
That was Jonah.
噢对犹大约拿耶稣
Oh, right. Judas, Jonah, Jesus.
真容易搞混
Lot of "J"s.
小乔治你走吧
Georgie, you should go.
我们不解决这事我就不走
Not till we figure this out.
行那我和我孙女再加深加深感情
Fine. More time I get to spend with my granddaughter.
你这样我就走了 -你们俩闹够了没给我坐下
Then I'm leaving. -That's enough out of you two. Sit.
这可是我办公室
But this is my office.
坐下
Sit.
小乔治我知道你现在很不爽
Now, Georgie, I know you're upset,
但是圣经上很清楚说明了你应该如何对待父母
but the Bible's pretty clear about how you should treat your parents.
原话是"尊重你的母亲" 而不是"尊重你的丈母娘"
It's "honor your mother," not "honor your mother-in-law."
玛丽快别说了 -我懂
Mary. -I get that,
我也和我妻子交换了誓言她也有母亲啊
but I also made a vow to my wife who has a mother herself.
就她也配当妈啊
Oh, she's a mother, all right.
玛丽你别说了
Mary!
我之前也说过你还得尊重你的妻子
Now, as I was saying, you do need to honor your wife, as well.
他妻子是支持我的哦就顺便说一下
Who, for the record, is on my side.
她只是不想支持她母亲而已
Only 'cause she don't want to be on her mom's side!
因为那女人是个禽兽
Because that woman is a monster.
她故意不把我的照片放进丝丝的第一本相册里
She left me out of CeeCee's "My First Photo Album."
我来总结一下奥德丽是禽兽你儿子是犹大
So she's a monster, and he's a Judas
就因为一本宝宝相册？
because of a baby's photo album?
你要经历过才能懂得我的感受
You had to be there.
她尝试给你道歉是你不接受
She tried to apologize to you, and you wouldn't have it.
她这算个屁的道歉
Apology, my sweet patootie.
玛丽别说脏话
Mary, language.
你们连"屁"都不能说？
You can't say "patootie"?
也许我们应该邀请你的丈母娘参与这场对话
Maybe we should invite your mother-in-law to be a part of this conversation.
当她的面说她做错了我喜欢
Tell her she's wrong to her face. I like it.
把罪恶从你的灵魂里冲洗走
我不理解我为啥必须要来
I don't understand why I have to be here.
你马上就知道原因了你开骂吧
You're about to. Let her have it.
没有人要骂任何人
No one's letting anyone have it.
别指望我再道一次歉
I already apologized once, I'm not doing it again.
你确定吗？你应该练练怎么道歉
You sure? You could really use the practice.
行了你们够了
All right, that's enough!
你们俩必须解决这事
You two have got to work this out
因为你们逼着我和曼迪站队
'cause you got me and Mandy taking sides.
他觉得曼迪太过分了
He thinks Mandy was out of line.
你可真是大嘴巴啊
You are just a blabbermouth!
开玩笑呢吧
Oh, you got to be kidding me.
曼迪感谢你能前来
Thank you for coming, Mandy.
请坐吧
Please, take a seat.
你说是紧急事件
You said it was an emergency.
我都睡沙发了还不算紧急事件啊
I'm sleeping on the couch. It kind of is.
你们一定都知道
Now, as I'm sure y'all know,
圣经教导我们一个家庭不能分♥裂♥
the Bible teaches us that a house divided cannot stand.
很好那我们怎么再团结起来呢
Great, so how do we un-divide it?
通过爱
Love.
这都是你们教会里瞎扯的
Well, that's just a bunch of Baptist baloney.
你听到了吗？她在亵渎上帝
You hear this? Blasphemy!
玛丽你冷静点
Mary, take it down a notch.
奥德丽也请你表示一些尊重
And Audrey, if you could please show a little respect.
你们俩简直不可理喻
You two are ridiculous.
我太同意了亲爱的
I couldn't agree more, honey.
别拍我马屁
Oh, don't try to be on my side.
行了行了我们别纠结过去的错误了
O-Okay, okay, rather than focusing on past transgressions,
一起来考虑前进的方向吧
why don't we find a path forward?
能让你们这个家庭回归上帝的恩典的方向
A means by which this family can return to God's grace.
我要回家了
Well, I am returning home.
走好不送
Don't let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya!
玛丽够了
Mary!
曼迪小乔治我们来讨论一下如何改善
Mandy, Georgie, why don't we discuss how to improve
你们之间以及你们和主的关系吧
your relationship with each other and the Lord?
我原谅你了我们走吧
Oh, I forgive you. Let's go.
太好了
Sweet!
我就当这事解决了啊
I'm gonna call that one a win.
这是啥呢
What am I looking at?
我♥草♥拟的外婆奶奶和平相处协议
The Grandmother Agreement. I typed it up.
我修正了所有的拼写错误
And I fixed the spelling.
它就像合同一样
Anyways, it's a contract.
之前我们家有不愉快的话谢尔顿也写过类似的协议
Sheldon used to make these when people weren't getting along.
丝丝每个月在库珀家睡两个晚上
"CeeCee will spend the night at the Cooper house twice a month."
这个好
I like that.
由我带宝宝去医院做检查
Ooh, and I get doctor's appointments.
你会失去这个特权一旦你...
Which you will lose if...
一旦我称呼玛丽为"那个女人"
If I refer to Mary as "that woman,"
或者"奇葩" 或者...
or "that kook" or...
我不想把这个词说出来
I prefer not to say this one out loud.
你也一样别用太难听的词称呼她
And same goes for you-- no name-calling,
美国南部常见说法根据语境有时表达同情有时表达反讽
也不能说"愿上帝保佑你"
or "bless your hearts."
我们都知道你是什么意思
We all know what that means.
行吧
Fine.
好了你们赶紧签名然后我们好过上安稳的日子
All right, let's get to signing and move on with our lives.
你觉得呢？
What do you think?
我就问一个问题如果她死了我能得到她的照顾丝丝的时间段吗
Just one question. If she dies, do I get her CeeCee time?
妈你别说了
Mom!
到时候发生了再说吧
We'll cross that bridge when we get there.
看呐我们又是一个欢乐大家庭了
Look at that-- one big happy family.
啊对对对 -你起码等到墨水干吧
Yeah, right. -Oh, at least let the ink dry!
西尔斯百货
好了
All right.
外婆和奶奶可以离宝宝再近一些
Why don't we get the grandmas a little closer to the baby?
不用了她们的位置很好
Nope, they're fine where they are.
赶紧拍吧
Just take the picture.
笑一个
And smile.