尝试（2020）

of anyone putting their hand down my top here, is there?
完全是浪费时间
Complete waste of my time.
我竟然为这个请了保姆？ -我还专门脱毛了
I got a babysitter for this? -I got a wax.
那你开车时阻力会更小 对吧？
You'll be more aerodynamic then, won't you?
请用
There we are.
你干理发多久了 尤瑟夫？
How long you been barbering, Yusuf?
在土耳其做了八年
Eight years in Turkey.
在这里做了四年 不太开心
Four years here. Not happy.
不开心吗？
No?
好吧
Okay.
不过谢谢你过来
But thanks for coming.
不 我想来 家里的情况不太好
No, I want to. Things are not good at home.
你用几号♥卡尺？
What grade is that?
好像是四号♥ -不 那不对…
It was a four, I think. -No, no.
那会让你的头看起来很大 哥们 像南瓜
It makes your head look big, man. Like pumpkin.
好吧 我去拿点酒来
Okay, good. I'm just gonna get some shots here, all right?
大家至少把外套脱了 拜托 各位兄弟
Let's at least take our coats off. Bloody hell, lads.
你好 能给我四杯龙舌兰酒吗？
Hello, mate. Can I have four shots of tequila, please?
喂？不 等等
Hello? No. Hold on.
等等…
Hold on. Hold on.
是 -嗨 宝贝 是我
Yes. -Hi, babe. It's me.
帮帮我 -什么？怎么了？
I need your help. -Why? What's happened?
我把派对弄成杰森风格 但我应该弄成妮基风格
Well, I've Jason'd it and I should've Nikki'd it.
现在变成了史上最烂单身派对 斯考特看起来很不开心
And now it's like the worst stag do ever and Scott seems really upset.
你希望我做什么？
Well, what do you want me to do about it?
能不能把你的一个活动给我们 求求你？
Can we have one of your activities, please?
不行 那是我的 -别这样
No! They're mine! -Oh, come on.
你们在哪？ -卡丁赛车
Where are you now? -Go-karting.
卡丁赛车 听起来真好玩
Go-karting! That sounds amazing.
我很想去…你们之后去哪？
I'd love to go-- Where you going afterwards?
涂鸦作坊
Graffiti workshop.
好 能把涂鸦作坊给我们吗 拜托？
Okay, can we have the graffiti workshop, please?
不行 我们想去涂鸦作坊
No! We want graffiti.
听我说 你们去开卡丁赛车 然后去涂鸦作坊
Look, you're going go-karting and then a graffiti workshop.
两个活动都要用手臂 你们的手臂会很累
That's two arm things. Your arms are gonna get tired.
好啦 但涂鸦的钱你来给
Okay, fine. But you pay for graffiti.
还有在这里开一轮车的钱 -好
And another session here. -Yes.
太谢谢你了 妮基 我爱你
Thank you so much, Nikki. I love you.
是为11个人订的
It's booked for 11 people.
这有点不够人数 但…
That could be a bit of a stretch, but...
好的 拜拜
Okay, bye.
好 准备好了吗？
All right. We ready?
是 -好了吗？来吧
Yes! -Yeah? Come on!
出发
Let's go.
走吧…
Come on. Come on.
走
Go.
赛车手们 绿灯就出发
Okay, racers, we go on green.
准备好了吗 妈妈？
Are you ready, Mum?
别分散我的注意力 宝贝
I'm in the zone, love!
好吧
All right.
喂 你为什么怪怪的？
Oi! Why you being weird?
没什么
It's nothing.
好吧
Okay. Fine.
我和弗莱迪睡了 -什么？为什么？
I slept with Freddy. -What? Why?
我不想聊
I don't wanna talk about it.
艾瑞卡 你在…
Erica, what are you--
嘿 妮基 -怎么？
Hey, Nikki. -What?
我打算取消婚礼 -什么？
I'm thinking of calling off the wedding. -What?
凯伦 -出发
Karen! -And we're off.
凯伦
Karen!
等等啊…
Wait! Wait!
等等…
Wait! Wait!
涂鸦 不错吧？声音被剥夺者的语言
Graffiti, yeah? The language of the disenfranchised.
对 每个人69英镑 这生意是挺会剥夺客人的
Right, this one costs 69 quid a pop, so these lot are pretty franchised.
多谢你来 爸爸
Thanks for coming, Dad.
你妈妈说我每天必须做一件没做过的事
Your mum says I've got to do one new thing every day
所以如果我做这件事就不需要吃木莎卡
so if I do this, I don't have to eat the moussaka.
这种人生态度才对
That's the spirit.
太棒啦
Yeah!
行行好吧
Oh, for God's sake.
真好玩
This is so fun!
你在做什么？
What are you doing?
听着 不是你想的那样
Look, it's not what you think.
我和他睡觉是把他当作 孩子他爸 不是男人
I slept with him as a father, not as a man.
你为什么要取消婚礼？
And why you calling off the wedding?
什么？ -不知道
What? -I don't know!
你取消婚礼了？
You calling off the wedding?
你要取消婚礼？我能换衣服了吗？
You're calling off the wedding? Can I get changed?
不 -是因为戴文吗？
No! -Is it 'cause of Deven?
当然不是
Absolutely not!
谁是戴文？ -出发
Who's Deven? -And we're off!
天啊 能不能别每次都这样？
Oh, God! Will you stop doing that?
真要命
Bloody hell!
今天的主题是爱
The theme today for you is love.
大家记住 跟随内心的热忱
Remember, everyone, to follow your passion
自♥由♥发挥 用艺术表达
and be free with your art.
但也请记得盖好罐子的盖
But also, remember, please, to put the lids back on the cans.
你用大脑想得太多
You are having too many head thoughts.
你应该利用直觉
You need some gut thoughts.
聆听直觉的声音
Listen to what it's telling you.
别想太多 -别想太多
Just don't overthink it. -Don't overthink it.
我的天 约翰 进展不错啊？
Bloody hell, that's coming on, innit, John?
挺好的 杰森 越来越有样子了
It's getting there, Jason. It's getting there.
从拉夫里格山俯瞰格拉斯米尔
Grasmere looking down from Loughrigg Terrace.
从卡斯尔里格上山可以避开大雾
You avoid a lot of the mist you get up at Castlerigg.
你那边如何 爸？
How you getting on, Dad?
我没灵感
Nah, I've lost it.
越画越糟 -这是什么？
It's got away from me. -What is it, mate?
哈里和梅根
Harry and Meghan.
我得和你说一件事
I have to tell you something.
好 说吧
All right, go on then.
算了 当我没说
Nah, don't worry.
好吧 聊得挺开心
All right. Good chat.
凯伦
Karen!
你在做什么？ -你能不能和我聊聊？
What you doing? -Would you just bloody talk to me?
停车 -什么？不
Pull over! -What? No!
凯伦 停车
Karen, pull over!
不
No!
停车 凯伦 停下 -你在干嘛？
Just stop, Karen! Pull over! -What you doing?
快停车 凯…
Pull over now, Kare--
嘿 -怎么了？
Hey. -What's going on?
我发现了他的结婚誓言 -好吧
I found his wedding vows. -All right.
是用模板写的
They were from a template.
好吧
Okay.
那没什么 很多人都用
That's all right. Loads of people use them.
每个女人都想听到那些特别的词？
What, those seven special words every woman wants to hear?
“我的人生改变了 填写日期”
"My life changed on 'enter date here.'"
他是个作家啊
He's supposed to be a writer.
是 但他的水平不太好 不是吗？
Yeah, but he's not a very good one, is he?
是啦 但这就是问题
Yeah, but that's the thing, isn't it?
他认为他的写作水平很棒
He thinks he is.
他连自我意识都欠缺 他怎么可能顾及到我呢？
If he's not even self-aware, how is he gonna be me-aware?
小心
Watch out!
天啊 -怎么了？
For God's sake! -What's going on?
我们打算去喝一杯
We are going to get a drink.
总算等到 好 -谢天谢地
Finally. Right. -Thank God.
来 走吧
Come on. Let's go.
不 各位 这不在我的计划中
No! No, guys. I didn't plan for this.
电邮里没写
It's not on the email!
是讽刺作品？
Is it a satire?
不 只是一只戴帽子的独角兽