大门奖（2023）

有人吗?
Hello?
里面有人吗?
Is someone in here?
我有球棍...和电枪在手
I-I have bat... and a Taser,
而且我识以色列格斗术,所以...
and-and I know Krav Maga, so...
(闪蝶,探索你的人生潜能)
甚麽鬼?
What the hell?
(欢迎使用闪蝶,准备好开始未?)
好吧
Okay.
(正在启动闪蝶...)
(测试)
(闪蝶是改变的象徵)
(经过蝶蛹...)
(若有人因而受困扰)
(闪蝶概不负责)
(内容不应被当作...)
(准备好探索人生潜能?)
准备好,天啊
Yes. Jesus.
(闪蝶,投币开始)
(你的人生潜能已揭晓)
(你的人生潜能:英雄)
对,好吧
Yeah, okay.
积及,这是甚麽鬼?
Jacob, what the hell is this?
我不知道,像是电子游戏之类
I don't know. It's like a video game or something.
它从何而来?
Where did it come from?
我不知道,你也不知?
I-I don't know. You don't know?
你怎会不知道?你不是在仓库补货吗?
What do you mean you don't know? Weren't you here, stocking shelves?
是啊,当然,我戴了耳机,但是...
Yeah, definitely. I just had my headphones on, but--
当时你一直在场?
You were here the whole time?
没错
Yeah.
所以,它像魔术般突然出现?
So, it just appeared like magic?
没错
Yeah.
“探索你的人生潜能”
"Discover your life potential."
你觉得街坊会玩这部机吗?
You think people might actually use this thing?
会啊
Yeah.
《天命票务机》
对,听闻柏校长躺了一小时
Yeah, apparently, Principal Pat had been there for an hour.
对,若不是积及发现,她可能会丧命
Yeah. She could've died if Jacob hadn't found her.
唏噢,英雄回来了,我要收线了
Hey-oh, the hero's here! I gotta go.
唏 - 够了,好吧
Hey. - Okay. All right.
你不是要上班吗?
Shouldn't you be at work?
我不知道,辞了职的人应该上班吗?
I don't know. Should people who quit their jobs be at work?
甚麽? - 没错,老友,你启发了我
What? - Yeah, man. You inspired me.
你四围拯救生命
You're running around saving people's lives,
我却为少少人工开着洗冰车兜圈
and here I am, driving a Zamboni in circles for a shit wage.
我没拯救生命,只是报了警
I'm not saving people's lives. I dialed 911.
顶多只值得被讚识用手♥机♥
At most, I should be praised for knowing how to use a phone.
积仔,你看
Hey, Jake, check it out.
我为你炮製了...一块面
I made you... ...a face.
像你妈妈以前那样
Just like your mom used to.
但我们没有洋葱,所以我用了西芹
Except we didn't have onions, so I used celery.
鸡蛋刚过了最佳食用日期,但没发臭
And the eggs are past the sell-by date, but they smell fine.
不一定要吃的 - 好吧
You don't have to eat 'em-- - Okay.
好吧,爸爸,发生甚麽事?
All right, what's going on, Dad?
为甚麽煮早餐和跟我倾谈?
Why are you making breakfast and conversation with me?
为甚麽叫我“积仔”? - 没有原因,积及
Why are you calling me "Jake"? - Because, Jacob.
听我讲,我知道
Look, I know...
你我不是...超级亲密
...that you and I aren't... ...super tight.
而且我知道你一直要收拾很多烂摊子
And I know that you've had to pick up a lot of slack around here
捱了很久,但现在我会改了
for a long time, but I'm gonna step up my game now.
我觉得没有这个需要
Uh, I-I don't really think I need that.
我要上学了
I should get to school.
好吧,但是,阿仔... - 不要讲
Cool. But hey, Sport-- - No.
柏校长的事
With this whole Principal Pat thing,
我只想说...
I just wanted to say...
做得好
awesome.
好吧
All right.
好嘢
Yeah!
老友,你怎会救校长?真是白♥痴♥
Dude, why'd you save the principal? Fricking nerd!
讲笑而已,老友,是真的,我超欣赏你
I'm just kidding, man. I'm just kidding. I fricking adore you.
好吧,各位请...
All right, everybody just--
让积及安顿下来吧
Let's give Jacob a chance to settle in.
相信大家都知道积及抽中甚麽卡了
I'm sure that we all know by now what was written on Jacob's card.
我知道很多同学很雀跃
And I know that a lot of you are very excited,
因为他似乎已发挥了“潜能”
because it seems like he's fulfilled his "potential."
但今堂是历史课
But this is a history class.
我认为大家应该从历史学习
I happen to think that we can learn things from history.
不如谈谈会发生甚麽事
Let's talk about what would happen
若闪蝶机在某些重要历史时刻出现
if the MORPHO machine existed at some key historical moments.
好吧,丽塔,假如你是亚伯拉罕林肯
Okay, Rita. You are Abraham Lincoln,
并准备在伊利诺州春田市开设律师事务所
and you're about to start your law practice in Springfield, Illinois.
好吧 - 你真的会吗?
Okay. - Or are you?
因为我是闪蝶机
Because I am the MORPHO machine,
并给你一张卡说你的潜能其实是...
and I have given you a card that tells you your potential is actually to be...
“糖果师” - 我想问的是,林肯先生
"Candy maker." - So now the question is, Mr. Lincoln,
你会否改为製作虫仔软糖和棒棒糖
do you pursue a career making sour worms and lollipops,
抑或继续走原路,开设律师事务所
or do you continue your trajectory of setting up a law practice
并成为美国史上最具影响力的总统?
and becoming the most influential president in American history?
我应该会做律师?
I guess I become a lawyer?
当然
Of course you do.
但他还会活着
He'd still be alive though.
甚麽? - 我指林肯
What? - Lincoln.
若他做糖果师,就不会被刺杀
No one would've assassinated him for being a candy maker.
美国就会失去一位伟大的总统,不是吗?
America would've missed out on a pretty great president, don't you think?
但林肯不是在皮奥利亚演说明言
Isn't it true that in his Peoria speech, it was Lincoln's position
如果或当奴隶重获自♥由♥ 他会逼使他们离开美国吗?
to force slaves to leave America if and when they were freed?
对
Uh-huh.
其实严格来说,今堂是欧洲历史课,丽塔
You know, strictly speaking, this is a European history class, Rita,
不如我们按教程讲书吧
so let's just try and stay on that lesson plan.
莎凡娜,亨利一世会否签署奥尔顿条约
Um, Savannah. Would Henry I have signed the Treaty of Alton
若闪蝶机说他应该成为...
if the MORPHO machine had told him that he was supposed to be a--
不知道,例如校工?
I don't know, a janitor?
我们还未讲到奥尔顿条约 你每堂都在讲闪蝶
We never got to the Treaty of Alton. You keep doing lectures about the MORPHO.
我提出来是因为我见到很多人
I bring it up because I see a lot of people
沉迷于这部机提供的指示
diving into whatever a machine tells them to do,
而没有认真思考后果
instead of really thinking about the consequences.
你不是抽到“教师”吗?
Didn't you get "Teacher"?
而你不是在教书吗?
And aren't you... teaching right now?
没错
Yeah.
我在努力中
I'm trying to.
好吧
Okay.
不如...我有惊喜给你们
Let's tr-- I've got a surprise for you guys.
又要看电影?
We gonna watch another movie?
错了,不是又看电影
No, we are not watching another movie.
我要打给一个你们认识的人
I'm gonna make a little call to someone you know...
她对闪蝶机有些有趣的见解
...who will have some interesting thoughts on the MORPHO machine,
我相信是如此
I would've thought.
好吧,我应该先打给她才讲出来,但是...
Okay. I probably should've dialed her in before announcing it, but--
等等,唏
Oh, no, hold it. Hey--
哈囉,柏校长,你好吗?
Hello, Principal Pat! How are you feeling?
没看上去那麽差
Better than I look,
即是没讲过甚麽,我知道
which isn't saying much, I know.
你似乎没有大碍
You look fine.
听住,得知你出意外,我很难过
Listen, I'm so sorry to hear about your accident,
它之所以发生,是因为你鲁莽地追寻潜能
which was brought about because you were recklessly pursuing your potential.
想分享事发经过吗?
Do you wanna talk us through what happened?
你们都知道事发经过,德斯提
Well, you all know what happened, Dusty.
积及高华克救了我一命
Jacob Kovac saved my dang life.
对,明白,但此前发生了甚麽事?
Yep-- Yeah, okay, but right before that happened, what happened?
我在追寻自己的潜能
Well, I was pursuing my potential
享受无穷乐趣
and having the time of my life.
真期待再踩电单车
Ooh, I can't wait to get back on my bike.
但与此同时
But, no, in the meantime,
有马利克先生陪住我
I have Mr. Malik here keeping me company.
哈囉,各位同学 - 哈囉
Hello, students! - Hello.
我唯一的损失就是错过今晚
The only pain I'm in is the pain of missing the first
第一场返校日篮球赛
homecoming basketball game tonight.
医生说我不宜跳跳板入樽
The doctor says I'm in no condition to do my dunk off the trampoline.