救援高手（2013）

是粉氏热狗店的第一千万位顾客
are the 10 millionth Pink's customer.
没错
I am serious.
你赢得了一次海上单人龙虾午宴
You have won a lobster lunch for one at sea.
在海上
At sea.
恭喜你
Congratulations.
Jonathan彻彻底底地上钩了
Jonathan bought it hook, line and sinker.
于是我在圣佩德罗港停了艘船
So I docked a boat in the San Pedro harbor
之后派了辆豪华轿车 雇了俩模特
and then sent a limo with two hired models
让他在去海边的整个过程中都被蒙在鼓里
to keep the ruse going on the way to the sea.
我很开心能成为粉氏热狗店的第一千万名顾客
I'm so excited to be the 10th millionth customer of Pink's.
我超爱他们家的热狗
I love their hot dogs.
能为他们代言我感到很兴奋
I'm so excited to represent them.
Jonathan到达的时候 正合我意的被蒙在鼓里
Once Jonathan arrived, I had him right where I needed him,
而他马上就会明白
and he was about to learn
占了粉氏热狗的便宜可吃不了兜着走
that taking advantage of Pink's does not go unpunished.
不一会儿 我们便出发驶向大海
Shortly after, we headed out to sea,
而Jonathan完全不知道
and Jonathan had no idea
他的一生将会彻底改变
that his life was about to change forever.
你的人生信条是什么
What's your personal tagline?
想怎么活就怎么活 尽情享受
Live life how you want to live it and enjoy it...
嗯哼 - 因为没有人会
Mm-hmm. - Because no one's gonna...
没有人能伤害你
no one can hurt you.
不为任何人而活 - 没错
Don't answer to no one. - Exactly.
是吧 - 不为任何人而活
Yeah. - Do not answer to nobody.
太对了
Yeah.
我真的非常开心
I'm just so happy
粉氏热狗的第一千万名顾客
that the 10 millionth Pink's customer
竟然是个如此无私又诚实的人
turned out to be such a selfless and honest guy.
没错
Yes.
当我们开到深水区时
Once we got to deep enough waters,
我领着Jonathan上了顶层甲板
I led Jonathan up to the top deck,
我的计划将在此呈现
where my plan was about to unfold.
请坐在你的专属座位上
Have a seat at your own personal table...
这里好美哦 - 在海上
This is so gorgeous. - Out at sea.
不错吧
Huh?
重头戏来了
And here we go.
希望你肚子饿了
I hope you're hungry
来吃海风吧
for nothing.
就现在
Now.
幕布后面藏着四位顾客
Hiding behind a curtain were four of the people
Jonathan冷酷无情地插了他们的队
that Jonathan had callously cut in front of
就为了提前吃到热狗
to get his hot dog first.
你不是第一千万名顾客
You're not the 10 millionth customer.
你今天坐在这是因为我知道
You're here today because I know
你那天并没有和医生预约
you didn't have a doctor's appointment.
我亲眼见你走进了电影院
I saw you go into a movie theater.
你认真的吗 - 当然
Are you serious? - Yes.
而你插了这四个人的队
And these are four people that you cut in front of
以自视高人一等的做派
that you thought you were better than,
其中包括一个九岁的小女孩
including a nine-year-old girl.
请不要生气
Don't be mad.
我只是不明白你为什么要插队
I just don't understand why you would cut us.
我真的很抱歉 我其实不是那种人
I am truly sorry. I'm really not like that.
我不是个骗子 虽然我当时是说了谎
I'm not a liar. I mean, even though I did say that,
我当时压力太大 我 我只是
I was--I was under a lot of--I-I just--
他问过我们是否想插到前面
He asked us if we wanted to go,
也问了我们后面的先生是否有清单上的急事
and he asked the guy behind us if we had anything on the list,
我们都表示没有
and we both said no.
但你得知道 我当时 - 而且你当时还说
But, you know, I wasn't lying - And, yes, you were like,
并没有撒谎 - "噢 你确定吗 我不想插队的"什么的
when I said... - "Oh, are you sure? I don't want to do it," and this, that.
不 我没有 - 当然 你先点吧
No, I did not. - Sure, go ahead.
因为我们以为你约了医生
'Cause we thought it was a doctor's appointment,
我们还以为我们在帮一个陌生人的忙
and we thought we were being kind to a stranger
让赶时间的他赶紧先买♥♥个热狗吃
who was in a hurry and wanted to grab a bite to eat
然后好去见医生
before the doctor's appointment.
既然Jonathan已经认识到他的行为如何影响了他人
Now that Jonathan understood how his actions affected others,
是时候让他接受惩罚了
it was time for his punishment.
我最初设想的计划是
The initial plan I had in mind
让除Jonathan以外的所有乘客
was to unload all the passengers except Jonathan
乘上另一艘船
into a second boat
然后让Jonathan和主船一起沉入海底
and then sink the main boat with Jonathan on it.
但节目法律顾问表示这样太不安全了
But my legal department said that this was too unsafe.
所以我勉为其难地答应采用一项更温和的惩罚措施
So I reluctantly agreed on a milder punishment.
你得从这条普通的口香糖中取一片口香糖
You have to take a piece of gum from this ordinary pack of gum.
这是什么啊
What is that?
就是条普通的口香糖
It's just an ordinary pack of gum.
我不会这么做的
I'm not gonna do it.
Jonathan 我不是在和你谈判
Jonathan, this is not a negotiation.
你犯了错
You did something wrong,
惩罚就是从这条普通的口香糖中取一片口香糖
and your punishment is you have to take a piece of gum from this ordinary pack of gum.
好吧 那我背过身去再拿
Okay. I'm gonna turn around while I do it.
可以 - 我都不敢看
Okay. - I don't even want to see--
啊 好疼哎
Aah! That hurt.
疼就对了 这不是袋普通的口香糖
Yes. It wasn't a normal pack of gum.
这是电击口香糖
It was shock chewing gum.
现在他为自己的过错付出了代价
Now that he had paid for his crime,
我想要最后确认
I wanted to be sure that
下船后的Jonathan会变成一个更好的人
Jonathan left this boat a better man.
人可以被剖解为两个部分
Inside all of our anatomies, there's two parts.
一部分是个骗子
There's a part that's a liar
另一部分则是个好人
and a part that's a cool guy.
而你却让骗子那部分
And you're letting the part that's a liar
占据了你整个身体
take over your whole body.
在你内心深处 Jonathan
Deep down inside you, Jonathan,
我知道那里一定还有个好人
I know there's a good, cool guy.
而且我觉得如果你努力改变自己
And I feel like if you really work on yourself,
几年之后 你甚至也能成为一个
within a few years, you could even be the one
把别人困在船上的人
trapping people on boats.
苍天啊 好吧
Oh, my lord. Okay.
你现在不应该笑的
You shouldn't be laughing right now.
是啊 但你真的好奇葩啊
No, but you're so weird.
不 Jonathan 我不奇葩 - 你疯了吧
No, Jonathan, I'm not weird. - You are crazy.
没有 我很正常
No, I'm normal.
人们犯错时我给他们教训
I teach people lessons when they do something wrong.
你喜欢操纵他人 还诡计多端
You're very manipulative and conniving,
我很不喜欢
and I don't like it.
不论Jonathan是否长了教训
Whether or not Jonathan learned his lesson,
我知道自己那一天完成了一件很重要的事
I left that day knowing I had accomplished something important.
我遵守了自己的诺言
I upheld my promise
并让我发誓捍卫的品牌重获尊严
and returned dignity to the name I vowed to protect
通过让全世界知道
by letting the world know
这就是他们骗人的后果
that this is what was waiting for them
如果他们胆敢惹毛粉氏热狗店的话
if they decided to f**k with Pink's.