救援高手（2013）

我是个黑客 Mel 不是懒鬼
I'm a hacker, Mel, not a slacker.
警♥察♥已经开始怀疑了
Cops are getting suspicious.
你应该有个自己的办公室
You should get your own office.
别再用我的后屋了
Stop using my back room.
管你嘞 老太婆
Whatever, grandma.
好了 现在是黑客时间
All right, it's hacking time.
谢谢
Thank you.
祝你今天开心
Have a good day.
嘿 老大 你看过这个了吗
Hey, boss, did you see this?
微软将微型芯片放入小行星来控制它们
Microsoft's been putting microchips into asteroids to control them.
这肯定不是什么好事
This can't be good.
你应该告诉Kip
You should tell Kip.
没错
Right.
你在打什么算盘 盖茨先生
What are you up to, Mr. Gates?
该死 警♥察♥来了
Crap, the cops are here.
你快想办法 我去分散他们的注意力
Let me distract them while you figure this out.
好的
Okay, cool.
哦 你好 Suzanne警官
Oh, hello, officer Suzanne.
嗨
Hi.
黑客调查进展如何
How's the hacker investigation going?
继续吧
Go ahead.
噢 完全没有线索 所以
Oh, no leads yet at all, so...
好吧 一共87美元
Okay. That'll be $87, please.
危险
Danger.
小行星微型芯片故障
Asteroid microchip malfunction.
糟了
Oh, no.
我到底做错了什么
What have I done wrong?
我真不敢相信
I can't believe this.
我付出了那么多努力
I've worked so hard
为了完成这个电脑项目
to get this computer project going.
这简直闻所未闻
This is unheard of.
发生了什么
What's going on?
看起来有小行星正沿着一条直线轨道撞向地球
It looks like there are asteroids on a straight trajectory towards earth.
五分钟后我们都会死
We'll all be dead in five minutes.
你在说些什么
What are you talking about?
那里面有一个微型芯片
There's a microchip in there.
你不能侵入它吗
Can't you hack it?
我尽力而为吧
I'll do my best.
该死 我还有个女朋友
Crap, I have a girlfriend.
抱歉在你上班时打给你
Sorry I had to call you away from work.
这可能是小行星撞击之前我们最后道别的机会了
This just might be our last chance to say good-bye before the asteroid hits.
不要啊
Oh, no.
我好爱你 Richard
I love you so much, Richard.
我也爱你 Allison
I love you too, Allison.
过来吧
Come here.
我入侵的速度比以前更快
I hacked faster than I've ever hacked before.
有关小行星的消息传出后
When word of the asteroid got out,
人们争相抢♥购♥补给品
people were racing to get supplies.
每个人都想要纪念品以记住地球
Everyone wanted souvenirs so they could remember the earth.
人们都很伤心
And people were sad.
噢
Oh.
愤怒的暴徒在街上聚集
Angry mobs formed on the street.
我成功阻止这颗小行星的可能性很小
The odds of me stopping this asteroid were slim,
但我必须试试
but I had to try.
授予访问小行星权限
Asteroid access granted.
轨道已重新编程
Trajectory has been reprogrammed.
我做到了
I did it.
你拯救了世界 Kip
You saved the world, Kip.
<天网>的反响和预期一样
The Web went over as expected,
现在是时候让我拿下今晚的最佳影片了
and now it was time to seal my fate as the best film of the night.
我们下一个短片是部纪录片
Our next short is a documentary
叫做<我随意放屁>
called Me Farting On Command.
我希望这部放屁电影达到了目的
My hope was that the fart movie served its purpose.
因为现在放映已经结束
Because now that the screening was over,
该由我们的评审来决定最佳短片得主了
it was up to our judge to pick the best short.
我紧张地等待着他的决定
And I nervously awaited his decision.
好了 拿去吧
Okay, here you go.
好的
All right.
选择了<天网>
Selected The Web.
是的
I did.
好嘞
All right.
给我颁发这个奖项
Hand me this award...
好的 - 最佳短片奖
All right. - For best short film.
现在就给你吗
Hand it to you now?
噢 没错 - 好吧 呃 这个
Oh, yeah. - Okay, uh, this--
你不需要演讲什么的
You don't need a speech or anything, yeah.
好的 - 谢谢您
Good. - Thank you.
我做到了
I did it.
有了这个奖项
And with the award in hand,
就可以证明洛杉矶之光的营销计划是完全合法的
we now had proof that my marketing plan for L.A. Fame was 100% legal.
我在这的工作完成了
My work here was done,
但我还想跟一个人分享这个好消息
but there was one more person I wanted to share the good news with.
我为我电影的成功而感到骄傲
I was so proud of my movie's success
我迫不及待地想告诉我的搭档 Jessee
and I couldn't wait to tell my costar, Jessee.
我不知道你听没听说 我们拍的电影得了个奖
I don't know if you know, but the film we did actually won an award.
什么 - 是的
What? - Yeah.
什么奖
What award?
东洛杉矶国际电影节
Eastern Los Angeles International Film Festival.
哇哦 真是好消息啊 - 是挺好的 嗯
All right, that's exciting. - It's exciting, yeah.
挺不错的
Pretty good.
是啊
Yeah, yeah.
还有就是 有一件事
Anyways, there was something
我其实想跟你谈一谈
I wanted to actually talk to you about.
当我们拍摄
When we did that--
那场吻戏的时候
the kissing scene that we did.
我跟你说我进入了角色
And I told you I was in character,
但那可能是个谎言
but that might have been a lie.
好吧 没关系啊
Well, that's okay.
我想我可能掺进了一些个人的情感
I feel like there might have been some of me in there,
而我想问你的是
and I guess I was wondering
你在拍那场吻戏的时候
if when you did the kiss...
其中有多少是角色需要
how much of that was your character
有多少是你本人意愿
and how much of that was you?
呃
Uh...
你的意思是 我
You meaning did I, like--
我想要吻你吗
did I want to kiss you?
作为我本人Jessee
Me, Jessee?
是的
Yeah.
呃
Uh...
我的意思是
I mean,
那只是一个吻而已
it wasn't a big deal.
但我可能不会在大街上逮到你
But I probably wouldn't grab you on the street
然后就无缘无故和你接吻
and just kiss you out of nowhere.
谢谢你告诉我 可能吧
Good to know, I guess.
没关系 - 好的
Yeah. - Yeah.
在那一刻 我为Jessee感到难过
In that moment, I felt sorry for Jessee.
与另一个人类分享一个吻却毫无感觉
To share a kiss with another human and feel nothing
可以说活得很糟糕了
is a horrible way to live.
在我开车回家的时候
As I drove home,
我终于明白了当一个游客是什么感觉
I finally understood what it felt like to be a tourist.
满怀希望地前往某处
Going somewhere with so much hope
却只能带着纪念品离开
and leaving with nothing but a souvenir.
我感觉我现在随时都会醒来
Feel like I'm gonna wake up any minute
而这些都没发生 所以
and this didn't happen, so...
哇
Wow.
是啊
Yeah.
你愿意吻我的手吗
Would you kiss my hand?
好啊 我愿意吻你的手
Yeah, I'd kiss your hand.
好了 - 好家伙
There you go. - Good guy.
妥妥的 - 谢谢你 Mike
All right. - Thanks, Mike.