救援高手（2013）

我叫Nathan Fielder
My name is Nathan Fielder,
毕业于加拿大最顶尖的商学院之一
and I graduated from one of Canada's top business schools
并且成绩优异
with really good grades.
如今 我运用我的学识
Now I'm using my knowledge
来帮助挣扎求生的小型企业主
to help struggling small business owners
在这个竞争激烈的世界里获得成功
make it in this competitive world.
这
This...
就是救援高手
is Nathan for You.
经营一家加油站并不容易
Running a gas station is not easy,
没有人比Daniel Ashikian更深知其中艰辛
and no one knows that more than Daniel Ashikian
他在加州伯班克市塞万加油站
of Sevan Gas in Burbank, California.
生意太难做了
It's tough business.
我没法跟大公♥司♥竞争
I cannot compete with the big companies.
如今 在汽车里加满香槟要实惠得多
With these days it being more economical to fill up your car with champagne,
吸引消费者成了一件难事
it can be hard to draw in customers.
所以我带着一个降价的好点子去拜访了Daniel
So I paid Daniel a visit with an innovative way to lower his prices.
我想让你每加仑收费1.75美元
So I want you to charge $1.75 per gallon.
你知道什么是乌托邦吗 - 知道
You know what is Utopia? - Yeah.
它只存在于你的想象中
It's in your mind.
你不可能看到汽油只卖♥♥1.75美元
You're not gonna see $1.75 gasoline anymore.
那只存在于电影院中 - 好吧 听我说
Only in the pictures. - Well, listen.
不 不 不 你理智一点
No, no, no. You get reasonable.
不 我一直都 我很理智
No, I am being, I am reasonable.
你没有让我说完 - 好吧
You didn't let me finish. - Okay.
是返利以后
After rebate.
噢
Oh.
计划如下
The plan:
返利后汽油的价格是1.75美元
$1.75 gas after rebate.
这个返利活动可以让Daniel合法地
A rebate will legally allow Daniel
打广♥告♥宣称是全国最便宜的汽油
to advertise the cheapest gas in the country.
由于优♥惠♥力度实在太大
And because it's such a great deal,
那么获得这项返利比一般的要麻烦一点
it would only be fair to make claiming this rebate
自然在情理之中
a bit more inconvenient than normal,
它要求顾客要亲自将返利表投递
by asking customers to drop it off in person
到一座山顶上
at the top of a mountain.
到一座山顶上
At the top of the mountain.
嗯 这是个很狡猾的赚钱方法
Yeah, that's good tricky way to make money.
在距离塞万加油站约一个半小时车程的地方
About an hour and a half drive from Sevan Gas
在洛杉矶国家森林的中♥央♥区域
in the middle of the Angeles National Forest,
人们只能徒步登上奇洛埃山的顶峰
the peak of Mount Chileo is only accessible by foot.
我向Daniel解释道
I explained to Daniel
只要他对顾客们开诚布公
that as long as he was up front with his customers,
将返利箱放在奇洛埃山顶上就是完全合法的了
putting the rebate box atop Chileo was completely 100% legal.
如果有人真的去认领的话
If some of them is gonna claim it,
我不就得掏钱了吗
it's gonna cost me money, right?
你觉得人们会为了拿返利徒步登山吗
Do you think people are gonna hike up a mountain to get this rebate?
这
Uh...
经过一周的准备工作后
After a week to get everything prepared,
我们正式实施了这项优♥惠♥
we implemented the offer.
标价牌一挂上去
Within minutes of the sign going up,
就立即引起了轰动
it proved to be an instant hit,
街道上汽车排起了长龙
with a line of cars down the block.
真的只要1.75美元吗
Is it really $1.75?
返利之后
After rebate.
什么类型的返利
What type of rebate?
不是那种邮寄返利
It's not mail-in rebate.
你需要亲自拿过去
You have to take it personally.
拿去哪
Where's it at?
奇洛山
Mountain Chile.
哪里 - 奇洛山
Where? - Mountain Chile.
Nathan 是奇洛山对吗
Nathan, it's Mountain Chile, right?
这地方有什么特别之处
What's so special about this place
以至于我们必须去那才能返利
we have to go and get the rebate?
返利投递箱在那而已
That's just where the drop box is.
不可以直接寄过去吗 就像
You can't just mail it in, like just.
不是那种邮寄返利 不可以
It's not a mail-in rebate, no.
呃 我只加油就好了
Uh, I'll get the gas,
但我不想要返利
but, no, I don't want the rebate.
可以啊 这取决于你
Okay, it's up to you.
你不想去 没有关系
You don't want to do it, it's fine.
这取决于你
It's up to you.
嗯 如果你想去 我们提供前往山脚的免费班车
Well, we're providing a free shuttle to the base if you want,
之后要徒步走一个半小时
and then it's an hour and a half hike from there.
你在开玩笑吗
Are you kidding me?
这是完全正式的
It's totally official.
这上面有详细的说明
Everything is explained there.
如我所料 加油站人满为患
Like I expected, people were filling up.
并且没人想要索取返利
And no one wanted to claim the rebate.
但之后 事情急转直下
But then, the tide shifted.
嘿 我回来了
Hey, I'm back.
我换了衣服 我准备好了
I changed my clothes, and I'm ready.
你认真的吗 - 我认真的啊
Are you serious? - I'm serious.
听起来不错哈 我从没去过那儿
That sounds good. Yeah, I've never been there.
你准备去吗
You're gonna do it?
对啊 可以吗
Yeah. Is that cool?
可以 可以 很棒
Yeah, yeah, that's great.
我以前远足过 我喜欢登山
I've hiked. I like hiking.
真的吗 - 真的
Really? - Yeah.
我之前从没上去过
I've never been up there before.
听说那儿的景色很美
I hear the view is beautiful.
这项活动在吸引顾客的方面效果显著
It was clearly working to bring in customers,
但令我吃惊的是班车竟然快坐满了
but to my surprise the shuttle was actually filling up.
我发现Daniel对此忧心忡忡
I saw that this was worrying Daniel,
于是我把他叫到一边聊了聊
and I took him aside for a chat.
说实话 我没想到会有这么多人愿意去远足
To be honest, I didn't expect so many people to want to do the hike.
但是你放心 一旦他们到了那儿
However, be assured that once they get up there,
一切才刚刚开始
it's only just beginning.
好吧
Okay.
开车要花上一个半小时才能到山脚
It was going to take an hour and a half to drive to the base of the mountain,
所以我们过会儿再回头看这边
so we'll check back with this in a bit.
首先问一个问题 你觉得这幅画搞笑吗
But first, do you find this drawing funny?
如果你的回答是肯定的
If you answered yes,
你可能就是漫画家Greg Dohlen
You're probably caricature artist Greg Dohlen.
这幅画是他画的
He was the one that drew it.
从事漫画行业二十余载
And after two decades of doing caricatures,
他依然默默无闻
he has yet to make a name for himself.
出名从来都不容易
It's always a struggle.
并且我从1989年就开始干这行了
And I've kind of...I've been doing this since '89.
但有时候解决方案很简单
But sometimes the solution is as simple
就是紧跟潮流
as keeping up with the trends.
你把我画了下来 - 对
You drew me here. - Yeah.
小约翰 经常问令人尴尬的问题的小孩
看到你自己被画成卡♥通♥形象
It's enjoyable to see yourself
是很有意思的事 - 没错
portrayed as a cartoon. - Yeah.
但是我觉得它并不能使我发笑
But I don't think it makes me laugh.
漫画是一种侮辱型的幽默
Caricatures are insult comedy.
呃 可以这么说吧
Well, yeah.
而这类侮辱型的幽默
In the category of insult comedy,
容我向你展示下什么是当下正流行的
just to show you what's currently popular right now,
这儿 看着
Here, just watch.
我很喜欢你 杰森·亚历山大 我觉得你很性感
I like you, Jason Alexander. I find you sexy.
杰森·亚历山大和杰瑞·宋飞同为经典情景喜剧<宋飞传>主演
亲我啊 你个死胖子
Kiss me, you fat f**k.
我一直都想知道
I've always wanted to see
杰瑞·宋飞的屁♥股♥是什么味道
what Jerry Seinfeld's a*s tastes like.
我给他看了一些很流行的喜剧中心台吐槽片段
I showed him a clip of the wildly popular comedy central roasts,
用以佐证如果想要侮辱型的幽默引起轰动
which proved that to be a hit in insult comedy,
你越刻薄 效果越好
the meaner you are, the better.
计划如下 将Greg重新塑造为"讽刺之王"
The plan: To re-brand Greg as "The king of sting."
呃 我 我走极端时得到的负面回应
Um, I've got, I've gotten more negative reactions from going extreme
比正面回应要多
than positive reactions.