肯医生（2015）

Dr. Ken S01E17

Part 2 Sept. 7, 2020, 10:31 a.m.

我死了
I am dead.
别介啊截屏发给我
No way. Screen shot and text it to me.
你看到他的女友了吗
Did you see his girlfriend?
太路人了
Basic.
呵呵
Lol!
他是想说哈哈
He means l-o-l.
你们看过Emblem的新视频了吗
Um, so, have you seen Emblem's new video?
看到了天啊太帅了
Yes. Oh, my god. It's so great.
看了一百次吧
Um, like 100 times.
是我看错了还是韦斯利自带软萌属性
Am I wrong or does Wesley have, like, a gosling quality?
爸真的别说了
Dad, seriously stop.
放首Emblem3的歌♥吧
Just put on Emblem3.
什么
What?
马上就要见到了你咋还想听他们的歌♥
Why would you want to listen to a band we're about to see?
会破坏那种感觉的
It's gonna ruin the magic.
如果你主菜点的是牛排
If you order steak for your entrée,
那你开胃菜还会点牛排吗
would you also order steak for your appetizer?
我怎么知道我是鱼素者
I wouldn't know. I'm a pescatarian.
那鱼就是你们可以随意屠♥杀♥
Oh, so fish are just garbage animals
低等动物吗
you can slaughter at will?
得了吧塔米对自己坦诚点
Come on, Tammy. Let's be honest with ourselves.
好了谁想来一口鲜榨果汁
Okay, who's ready to crack open those pressed juices
这是我在酷炫又健康的
I got at the juicery where all the cool,
青年常去的果饮店买♥♥的
healthy teens hang out?
因为我就稀罕去那里
'Cause that place is my jam.
他是想说「我的天啊」
He means O-M-G.
天啊怎么了
Oh, no! What happened?
戴夫在生日派对上追蝴蝶
Dave was chasing a butterfly at a birthday party,
不小心踩到生锈的钉子了
and he stepped on a rusty nail.
你要是允许我穿坡跟
It wouldn't have gone through my shoe
钉子就钉不♥穿♥鞋底了
if you'd let me wear the wedges.
肯恩去看演唱会了
Ken's at a concert
急诊室人又总是很多
and the emergency room is always packed,
所以我才带他来这里
so I brought him here.
真机智
Good thinking.
在这里你们永远都是贵宾
Around these parts, you will always be a V.I.P.
也就是朴家贵宾
That's a Very Important Park.
肯恩会很高兴的
Ken would have loved that,
不是因为这很搞笑是因为跟他有关
not because it's funny but because it's all about him.
走吧先生去给你清理一下
Come on, sir. Let's get you cleaned up.
你♥爸♥在家有聊过我吗
So, hey, does your dad ever talk about me at home?
-没有 -好的
- Nope. - Okay.
好听我说
Okay. Here's the deal.
我知道戴夫要打破伤风疫苗
I know Dave needs a tetanus booster,
可他非常害怕打♥针♥
but he's deathly afraid of needles.
别担心小孩子我最拿手了
Oh, don't worry. I'm great with kids.
我是过来人
I was one.
我每次都这么跟他们说他们可爱听了
That's what I tell them. They love it.
好还有一件事你打过破伤风疫苗吗
Okay, just one more thing. Have you had your tetanus shot?
打过啊怎么了
Yeah. Why?
他逼急了是会咬人的
He will bite if he feels cornered.
你不信去问我们邻居的狗他很清楚
If you don't believe me, ask our neighbor's dog. He knows.
好了好了
Okay, okay.
我去买♥♥点零食你们坐好别动
I'm gonna get us some snacks, so stay in your seats.
我可不想你们惹上麻烦
I don't want you getting into trouble.
我是说生命只一次
I mean, of course, yolo and everything,
注意你们的周围
but stay aware of your surroundings
其实是劝告人们及时行乐
还是因为生命只一次
because, again, yolo.
我跟你一起去
I'll go with you.
好啊来吧小哥们
Yeah, you will. My dawg. Yolo!
爸你如果继续这样
Dad, if your behavior doesn't change,
我就不认你是我爸了
you are no longer my father.
冷酷无情啊
Wow. Cold as ice.
我可稀罕跟小团体出来玩了
But hanging with our squad is my jam.
不准再说你什么都稀罕了
Stop saying everything is your jam.
-天啊还有别的要求吗 -有
- Geez. Anything else? - Yeah.
这上面列了其他你不准再做的事
Here's a list of other things you need to never do again.
不准说「生命只一次」之类的话
"No using terms like 'yolo.'
不准问男友相关的事
No asking questions about boyfriends."
互动都不让吗
No interacting?
那我还不如去车里等着
Why don't I just go wait in the car?
往下翻
Scroll down.
「去车里等着」好吧
"Go wait in the car." Oh, okay.
返场演出的时候给你发短♥信♥
I'll text you during the encore
你就能提前把座椅加热器开开
so you can put the seat warmers on.
记得把塔米的位置温度调高点
Make sure you turn Tammy's on high.
她屁♥股♥怕冷
Her butt runs cold.
第一次和你女儿看演唱会吗
First concert with your daughter?
你们怎么看出来的
How could you tell?
我们听见她单子上的内容了
We overheard her giving you the list.
我们都有单子
We've all gotten the list.
我女儿还给单子过了层胶
My daughter laminated mine.
我女儿把单子设成了我的手♥机♥壁纸
My daughter made mine the wallpaper on my iPhone.
我都不知道怎么换掉
Yeah. I don't know how to change it.
但你不用在这傻站着
But you don't have to stand here and take it.
我还能去哪里
Where else am I gonna go?
家长休息室
A parents' lounge?!
太棒了
Hells, yeah!
在这能喝到白苏维浓葡萄酒
Who needs my self-absorbed she-devil of a daughter
谁还想管我那自私的小魔女
when I could be absorbing some of that Sauvy-B?
这个我稀罕
That's my jam!
「我稀罕」好潮的用词啊
"My jam." What a fresh expression.
戴茉娜我专业的同事
Ah, Damona. My professional co-worker.
等着
Hang on.
女士您请
M'lady.
派特听好
Pat, listen.
和你一起的日子我很开心
I've been having a lot of fun with you --
好了我知道你想说什么了
Okay. I think I know where you're headed with this.
那就太好了
Oh, that is such a relief.
-咱们需要缓一会儿 -没错
- We need to take a break... - Exactly.
...离开这里或许该去北方
...from this place, and maybe head up north
去葡萄酒之乡过一个浪漫周末
to wine country for a romantic weekend --
住民宿空中的或普通的
a B&B, air or regular.
Airbnb是美国旅行房♥屋租赁网
你来决定
It's up to you.
派特事情是这样的
Pat here's the thing --
我奶奶刚死了
My grandmother just died,
而我是警方头号♥嫌犯
and I'm the police's number-one suspect.
不是事儿
Not a big deal.
我可以给你搞个完美的不在场证明
I can provide you with an airtight alibi.
那么...
So...
戴夫我知道害怕打♥针♥是什么滋味
Dave, I get being scared of shots.
我很了解孩子我是过来人
I know a lot about kids. I was one.
好吧
Okay.
感觉会像被小蜜蜂叮了一下
Look, this will just feel like a minor bee sting.
我被叮过一次
Oh, I got stung once.
看吧不算太糟对吧
See? Not so bad, right?
我过敏了嗓子发紧
I was allergic, and my throat closed up.
那是我幼小生命中最惨痛恐怖的经历
It was the most painful and terrifying experience of my young life.
好吧布提蜜蜂钉咯
Okay. Ex-nay on the eesting-bay.
我会说小孩黑话
I speak pig latin.
英雄所见略同
A meeting of the minds.
我保证下手会很快的
This'll be quick. I promise.
好
Fine.
我能先喝杯水吗
Can I get a glass of water first?
当然乖
Sure, kiddo.
我们很合得来
We are a go for the shot,
多亏了「孩语者」朱莉·多布斯医生
thanks to Dr. Julie Dobbs, child whisperer.
戴夫
Dave?
你要干什么
What are you doing?