露营（2018）

at the back page of the "LA Weekly"
的封底看到了这个广♥告♥
for energy healing through touch.
通过触摸来治愈能量
And I'm like,
我就在想
"Does my whole life just have to be work?"
我一辈子都得工作吗
Hmm? Human rights law this,
人♥权♥法这个的
human rights law that.
人♥权♥法那个的
So I show up at this weird rave
所以我去了市区阁楼的
at this loft downtown... It was my rave, my loft.
怪异狂欢会 那是我的狂欢会 我的阁楼
Mm-hmm. Jandice is DJ'ing,
珍迪斯在那当DJ
and she's really focused.
她非常专注
I get so focused when I'm DJ'ing.
我在打碟的时候很专心
I'm already in such
我已经到了这么个
a weird headspace, you know?
奇怪的顶部空间
And this My friend Dusty
然后 我朋友达斯提
gave him some ketamine, and he was like, "Sure,
给了他一些K粉 他就想
I'll put that up my nose." So I just start wandering
好吧 我就吸一点 然后我就开始在这地方
all over the place, looking for a place
四处乱走 找地方
to lie down, and I finally find this bed,
躺下来 最后我找了一张床
and I just passed out. And it was my bed.
然后躺了下去 那是我的床
I had just unfurled
我刚刚把
the Casper mattress out of the box.
贾斯珀床垫拆箱
The next morning, I woke up with this...
第二天早上 我醒过来发现
beautiful woman in my arms, covered in glitter.
这个漂亮的女人就躺在我臂弯里 闪闪发光
And, uh, we haven't spent
从那晚以后
the night apart ever since. And we found this tooth
我们就再也没分开过 我们在床上找到了一颗牙
in the bed, and it wasn't, like, either one of ours.
不属于我们中任何一个
Such a good omen, huh?
这是个好兆头 对吧
So you're a DJ.
所以你是DJ
DJ, Reiki healer,
DJ 灵气治疗师
I make and sell my own nut cheeses,
我自己制♥作♥和销♥售♥坚果奶酪
and I do some modeling for this figure-drawing class.
我还给人体素描课当模特
And I'm a notary. Oh, that's useful.
我还是个公♥证♥员 那很有用
Oh, and she also did
她还给我做了
this muscle testing on me.
肌肉测试
It turns out that all the vitamins
原来我服用的所有维生素
I was taking were really hurting my emotional growth.
都损害了我的情绪成长
We only take vitamins because of the lies
我们服用维生素只是因为
of big vita and the herbal companies.
维他命公♥司♥和医药公♥司♥的谎言
We get everything we could need
我们能够获得所有必须要素
purely from... both: Food.
从 食物中
Food.
食物
Okay, vitamins actually saved my life, so...
维生素确确实实救了我的命
I don't know if Miguel told you,
我不知道米格尔有没有告诉过你
but I had a hysterectomy.
我在生完儿子过后几年
Couple years after our son was born.
切除了子♥宫♥
Late Obama years.
奥巴马执政的最后几年
He ultimately took my uterus and both ovaries,
他夺走了我的子♥宫♥和两个卵巢
but he was worth it.
但这是值得的
Our little miracle.
我们小小的奇迹
Oh, my God.
我的天啊
I'm so sorry.
很遗憾听到这个
We carry so much life in our uteri.
我们的子♥宫♥承载着如此多的生命
Have you ever tried pelvic floor work?
你的盆底肌还能工作吗
I know this guy Mattiew
我认识一个叫马蒂的人
who does amazing internal releases.
她的活很好
Yeah, I don't think you understand
我不觉得你能理解
what I'm dealing with here.
我在这里的处境
If I did some internal release,
如果我做那种事
it would probably kill me, so...
可能会要了我的命
I know. It kills me every time.
我懂的 这每次都爽的要命
He goes so fucking deep.
他插得真♥他♥妈♥深
Okay, well,
好了
now that story time is over,
讲故事的时间结束了
let's get on with the itinerary for the day.
让我们开始今天的行程吧
Today we have a big bunch
今天我们有
of birds-of-prey-watching.
一大堆鸟要看
What are we looking for, Mommy?
我们在找什么 妈妈
A nest.
巢穴
A notorious hawks' nest--a heritage site, in fact--
一个臭名昭著的鹰巢 事实上是一个文化遗产
where the most noble hawks in all of California--
加州最高贵的老鹰所在之处
Oh, my God, look at this gorgeous lake, you guys!
天哪 快看这个漂亮的湖
Why would we waste our time
为什么要在能游泳的时候
looking for lame old birds
浪费时间
when we could swim? You know what?
去找什么跛足的老鸟 知道吗
Not a waste of time.
这不是浪费时间
A once-in-a-lifetime experience.
这是个千载难逢的体验
Don't worry, folks. Tomorrow we swim.
别着急 我们明天会有游泳项目的
But today...
但今天
is for the birds.
主要目的是鸟
We can devote today to the majestic
我们把今天奉献给
red-shouldered hawk of California--
加州威严的红肩鹰
Oh, you guys, the water is so good!
伙计们 这水太棒了
Oh, I love it!
我喜欢
Come in! What are you waiting for,
快来啊 你们在等什么
you suckers?
你们傻了吗
I'm here, baby!
我来了 亲爱的
Oh, I love it!
我喜欢
Beautiful!
真美
No, no, no, today's not swimming day.
不 不 我们今天不游泳
Tomorrow--tomorrow we swim.
游泳定在明天
We'll play games. We can do Marco Polo!
到时候我们会玩游戏 假扮马可·波罗
There may be brain-eating amoebas in there!
里面可能会有吃大脑的变形虫
Let me just remind you, none of you
我提醒你们一下 你们没人
is wearing sunscreen on your bodies!
在身上涂防晒霜了
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, sir.
别去
No, sir.
别去
Walter, don't do it.
沃尔特 别去
Guys, eyes on me!
伙计们 看我
I am the only certified lifeguard present,
我是这里唯一有证书的救生员
so please keep an eye on me.
所以请看着我
It's pretty nice!
这真的很赞
Guys.
伙计们
This is nice!
真棒
Swimming is tomorrow.
游泳项目是明天的
It's on the schedule.
这是日程表上的
* Waters *
* Sweet waters on my brain *
* Flush *
* Down the drain *
* Mixed in the gutter with the rain *
- * And here we are * - * Here we are *
- * Back again * - * Back again *
* Well, take a better look *
* Oh, won't you cast the hook *
* Into the waves *
* Oh, the waves *
* Above my brain goes flush *
* Down the drain *
- * I can obtain * - * Can obtain *
* And then I start again *
* T-t-t-t-t-t-t *
* Flush *
* Hush, hush, hush *
* T-t-t-t-t-t-t *
* Flush *
* Hush, hush, hush *
* Go flush *
* Hush, hush, hush, hush, hush, hush, hush *
* Go flush *
* Hush, hush, hush, hush, hush, hush, hush *
Hike.
跑起来
Orvis!
奥维斯
I'm really sorry. Walk away from me.
我真的很抱歉 滚远点
I think Jandice is dangerous.
我认为珍迪斯很危险
My son is injured!
我儿子受伤了
Hello. Help!
喂 救命
You saying you don't wanna go to the hospital?
你说你不想去医院
It's not like we're gonna be of any use.
我们去了也没什么用
Honestly, I just need a drink.
说实话 我只想喝一杯
Do y'all do jelly doughnut shots?
你们都知道果冻甜甜圈炮弹吗
I like you.
我喜欢你