拉米

Ramy S02E02

Part 4 May 31, 2020, 7:49 p.m.

其实那意味着世界末日
Well, it would mean it was the end of the world, but...
嗯
Yeah.
餐厅
我和你说中心的所有人都爱他
Dude, I'm telling you, everyone at the Center loves him.
说真的他只需要
Seriously, like, all he needed
有人给他一个机会而已
was for someone to give him a shot.
你根本不了解那个中心
You don't even know who the fuck the Center is.
你不了解阿里谢赫不了解他的教众
You don't know who Sheikh Ali is, whose sheikh he is.
随便什么你都相信吗
You're just committing to anything, man?
你得小心选择信仰的来源
You gotta be careful where you get your din from, man.
穆这个汉堡真是
This, uh, burger, Mo, this is the best‐‐
我这辈子吃过最好吃的
best burger I ever had in my life.
因为这是清♥真♥的
Yeah, it's because it's halal, you know.
真的吗怪不得这么好吃
Really? Man, that's why it's so good.
和穆滋林有关的都很棒
Everything that's good is "Muz‐lim."
是"穆♥斯♥林♥"
It's, uh, it's "Muss‐lim."
我说的就是"穆滋林"
What'd I say? I said "Muz‐lim."
"滋"是从哪来的
I don't know where the Z came from.
太烦人了我不是针对你
It's, like, very irritating. It's not projected at you.
很多人都说成"滋"
But they've added Zs on it.
应该是"斯" 和"撕逼"的"撕"一样
You know, it's a soft S, like, uh, pussy.
"穆♥斯♥林♥"
"Muss‐lim."
撕逼穆♥斯♥林♥ 撕逼穆♥斯♥林♥
Pussy, Muslim. Pussy, Muslim.
-撕逼穆♥斯♥林♥ -穆♥斯♥林♥
- Pussy, Muslim. - Muslim.
-撕逼穆♥斯♥林♥ -那什么
- Pussy, Muslim. - Yeah...
-撕逼穆♥斯♥林♥ -我觉得还有其他的练习方法
- Pussy Muslim? - I think there's other ways to learn this, though.
但我们已经沦落至此了
This is where we are now, isn't it?
其实我想说的是
Okay, what I'm trying to say is that,
自从我回来之后
you know, since I've been back,
穆♥斯♥林♥就对我很好
Muslims have been so good to me.
你带我去清♥真♥寺
You know, you bring me to the mosque.
把我介绍给所有人
You introduce me to all these people.
我和他们都成了朋友
You know, I'm making all these new friends,
所以我在考虑
and I'm just starting to think that,
我不知道可能我也想当个穆♥斯♥林♥
I don't know, maybe I want to become Muslim too.
我也想变得清♥真♥
Like, I want to be halal.
哥们你说真的
Dude, yeah. I mean, really?
真的我
Yeah. And I'm just...
可以吗
like, can I?
我有这个资格吗
Am I allowed? Am I allowed?
当然了
Yeah, of course, man.
如果你愿意的话可以来参加周五的礼拜
I mean, if you want, you can come to Friday prayers
你可以在开始之前宣读清♥真♥言
and you can take the Shahada right before.
很快的任何人都能做到
I mean, it's super quick, like, anyone can do it.
也许有点太快了
Maybe too quick, you know?
也许你该先读几本书
Maybe you should read a few books.
不不不我准备好了
No, no, no. I'm ready.
-确定你拿定主意了 -我确定我准备好了
- Make sure you're okay. - I‐I‐I know I'm ready.
经历了这些我确定我准备好了
After...After all this, I know. I'm ready.
穆要是我去的话你会来吗
Mo, if I go, will you come too?
-我吗 -对
- Me? - You.
好的我去
Okay, yeah.
他会去的会去的
He'll come, yeah. He'll come.
当然我会去的
Of course. Yeah.
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey!
把教堂还给我们
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey.
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey.
这些人上周也在这抗♥议♥
These guys were here last week.
我的清♥真♥寺可不会发生这种事兄弟
This would never happen in my masjid, bro.
用教堂当清♥真♥寺也太蠢了
I mean, taking over a church is just such a rookie move.
这种事真让我上火
Ah, this shit really pisses me off.
抱歉我没想骂人但这听着太可笑了
I'm sorry, I don't mean to cuss, but it sounds ridiculous.
别在意我们直接进去做礼拜
It's okay, man. We're just going to go in and pray.
有张光盘里讲如何成为穆♥斯♥林♥
I got this CD on how to be a Muslim.
里面讲到伊♥斯♥兰♥教是和平宗教
It said that Islam is a religion of peace.
可这些人什么他妈都不懂
They don't fucking understand.
没错老兄
Exactly, dude.
所以我们要对他们格外友好
That's why we just gotta be really nice to them, yeah?
你们好吗
Hey, guys. How's it going?
-滚蛋奥萨马 -奥萨马
- Fuck off, Osama. - Osama?
这也太没劲了除了奥萨马还有一个人
Come on, that's so wack, dude. There's this other dude.
哈立德·谢赫·穆♥罕♥默♥德♥ 那家伙真是疯了
Khalid Sheikh Mohammed. That guy's crazy, dude.
他在监狱里写了封信真是疯了
That guy, he wrote a letter in prison‐‐it was wild.
-但信中也有些道理 -行了
- It had some good points, though... - All right,
我们快进去
let's just go inside.
男人和女人一起做礼拜
Praying side to side like this?
这是什么新潮垃圾
Some new‐age shit.
是啊没有挤在后面或楼下的
Yeah, dude, there's no weird women's section
别扭的女性礼拜室
thrown in the back or downstairs.
大家一起做礼拜像在麦加一样
Everyone's together. It's just like Mecca.
-你根本没去过麦加 -但我在网上看过
- You never been to Mecca. - Yeah, but I‐‐ I've seen it online.
拉米这地方不错
Ramy, this is a nice place, man.
真的是个很棒的地方
It's actually a great space.
雅斯米娜可能会感兴趣
Yazmina might want to come here.
她讨厌别的清♥真♥寺但她会喜欢这里的
She hates the other mosque. But she'll dig this.
-嗯 -我不喜欢你这样
- Yeah. - I don't like your face.
我十分谦卑因为今天很荣幸
I'm humbled because today we are so fortunate
我们的教会中有两人
and blessed to have two amongst our congregation
要宣读清♥真♥言
who will take the Shahadah today.
真♥主♥至大
Takbir.
真♥主♥至大
Allahu akbar.
丹尼斯兄弟杰罗姆兄弟请
Brother Dennis, Brother Jerome, please.
北泽西苏菲派中心
跟着我读
Repeat after me.
万物非主唯有真♥主♥
There is no God but God.
真♥主♥的旨意让我们张开双臂
Inshallah, let us welcome our two new brothers
欢迎两位新兄弟加入我们
to this community with the most open of arms.
真♥主♥至大
Takbir.
真♥主♥至大
Allahu akbar.
祝贺你兄弟
Congratulations, Brother.
我真为你高兴兄弟
I'm so happy for you, brother.
所有人请起立准备做礼拜
Everyone up for prayer, please.
排整齐谢谢
Straight lines. Thank you.
祝贺你你还好吗
Congrats, man. You okay?
-嗯 -好
- Yeah. - Yeah.
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey!
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey!
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey!
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey.
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey!
伊♥斯♥兰♥教法滚出新泽西
No Sharia in New Jersey!
真♥主♥至大
Allahu akbar!
真♥主♥至大
Allahu akbar!
真♥主♥至大
Allahu akbar!
伊♥斯♥兰♥教是和平宗教
Islam is peace!
-去你♥妈♥的♥ -伊♥斯♥兰♥教是和平宗教
- Hey, fuck you! - Islam is peace!
-你们他妈有意见吗 -去你♥妈♥的♥
- You got a fucking problem? - Fuck you, man!
伊♥斯♥兰♥教是和平宗教
Islam is peace!
去你♥妈♥的♥ 操♥你♥妈♥
Fuck you, motherfucker!
伊♥斯♥兰♥教是和平宗教
Islam is peace!
冷静兄弟住手
Easy, bro. Stop!
丹尼斯丹尼斯
Dennis, Dennis!
丹尼斯快住手快住手
Dennis! Dennis, stop! Dennis, stop!
快住手住手是我是我
Stop, stop, stop! It's me, it's me!
是我啊是我别激动是我是我
It's me! It's me! It's okay! It's me! It's me!
是我
It's me!
是我
It's me!
操
Fuck!
不先生先生
No, no! Sir, sir!
先生
Sir!
对不起