拉米

Ramy S02E01

Part 4 May 31, 2020, 7:49 p.m.

Like sex and...
黄♥片♥
and porn.
然后感觉我和越多人在一起
And‐‐ and I feel like the more people I'm with,
我就感到越孤单
the more alone I feel.
我也试图用真♥主♥填补它
And I've tried to fill it with God.
我试过了我发誓
I have. Wallahi.
但我...我不知道该怎么做
But I‐‐ I just don't know how.
我去了埃及试图寻找答案
Like, I went to Egypt, and I tried to find something,
但...
and...
我找不到
I‐‐ I couldn't.
坦白说我开始看黄♥片♥
If I'm being honest, I started watching porn
是因为我想当一个好穆♥斯♥林♥
because I wanted to be a good Muslim.
因为我不想有婚前性行为
Like, I didn't want to have sex before marriage,
所以我...
so I...
我以为我可以看黄♥片♥来满足那种欲望
I thought I could just... watch porn to fill that urge.
因为我...我不想在现实生活里做
Like, I‐‐ like, I didn't want to do it in real life,
所以我以为我可以只是看看
so I thought I could just watch,
辣妈熟♥女♥之类的但...
you know, MILFs and stuff, but it‐‐ it...
结果只会让我做出更疯狂的事比如...
It just made me do crazier things. Like...
斋月期间我和一个有夫之妇上♥床♥了
I had sex with a married woman during Ramadan.
不过是在昏礼之后
It‐‐ it was after Maghrib, though.
我就想解释一下
Like, j‐‐ just so you know.
是在进食时段虽然也还是不对
It was during eating hours, not that that makes it okay.
我只是想解释一下
I just want you to know, like...
也许能减轻严重程度
if there's a‐ if that makes it any better.
我不知道能不能减轻
I don't know. I don't know if...
能吗
does it?
可能也没什么差别我不知道
Maybe it's all the same. I don't- I don't know.
我不...
I don't...
我不知道你想让我说什么
I don't know. What do you want me to say?
你能说两句么
Can you say something?
一直都是我在说你就没话要
I'm saying all this stuff. You have nothing to...
我跟我堂妹上♥床♥了行了吧
I had sex with my cousin, okay?
你想知道的是这个吗
Is that what you want to know?
我去了埃及睡了我堂妹
I went to Egypt, and then I fucked my cousin.
我们的爷爷去世了我却睡了我堂妹
Our grandpa died, and I fucked my cousin.
你让我回想起了我自己年轻的时候
You remind me a lot of myself when I was younger.
你也睡过你的堂妹吗
You had sex with your cousin too?
当然没有
Hmm, absolutely not.
但我当时非常自负为所欲为
But I had an ego and I was driven by my desires.
你有没有想过那些女♥优♥ 拉米
Have you ever thought about the actresses, Ramy?
什么
What?
那些小视频里的女人
The women you click on.
你有没有考虑过那些演员面临的困境
Have you ever considered the plight of the performers,
她们的痛苦
their pain,
她们在经历些什么
what they're experiencing?
我听说她们连床都没有
I've heard that they don't even have beds,
只能
that they're just...
待在流动货车里
driven around in white vans.
你了解到的是这样吗
Is this true in your findings?
我了解到的是的
In my findings, yeah.
要是你遇到了一个艳星
What if you met a porn star
你看着她的眼睛
and if you looked her in the eyes?
你会考虑她的感受吗
Have you considered her feelings?
我不会考虑
I haven't considered it,
我不会不会考虑任何事情
'cause I don't‐ I don't consider anything.
我只考虑我自己
I‐‐ I just consider myself.
就是这样我只
That's it. I'm just...
我只会考虑我自己我讨厌这样
I only ever think about me, and I‐‐ I hate it.
-我 -我明白那种感觉
- Like, I... - I know that feeling.
但幸运的是我遇到了一个人
But I was fortunate to find someone who...
他帮我重塑欲望抹掉自负
who helped me reframe my desires, kill my ego.
这就是我想要的
That's what I want.
我想让你当我的老师
I want you to be my teacher.
我想要立下誓言
I want to take the bay'ah.
抹掉自负
I want to kill my ego.
我怎么知道我是不是你的又一个欲望呢
How do I know I'm not just another one of your desires?
我没有跟你上♥床♥的想法
I don't want to have sex with you.
我想你也没有
I didn't think you did.
好吧
Okay.
但是这太轻易了我作为你的老师
But that would be easy, as your teacher,
全盘接受你的痛苦
to... hand me your pain,
帮你消除干净
asking me to take it away,
替你解决你的问题
be the solution to your problems,
你就不用面对自己了
relieving you of having to deal with yourself.
很多人都这样做
Many people do this.
你似乎有自己的
You seem to have your, um...
你似乎是被自己的
you seem to be driven by your...
被自己的欲望所驱使
by your own set of desires.
我不想要欲望
I don't want to have desires.
我不想渴望任何东西
I don't want to want anything.
我只想侍奉真♥主♥
I just want God.
如果我来当你的老师
If I'm to be your teacher,
你必须要永远对我诚实对我真诚
you must always be honest and truthful with me.
永远
Always.
你对这个誓言理解多少
You understand the bay'ah?
这是世上最深层的精神契约
There is no deeper spiritual contract in this world.
通过爱同情与真诚
We are forever bound
我们将永远结合在一起
through love, compassion, honesty.
嗯
Yeah.
拉米
Ramy...
欢迎踏上修行之路兄弟
Welcome to the path, brother.
愿此行有所收获
May it be fruitful.
你想一起做礼拜吗
Would you like to pray together?
好
Yeah.
基于你刚刚跟我分享的那些事情
Considering the nature of what you just shared with me,
我必须问清楚
I must know...
你上次自渎后洗澡了吗
have you showered since you last masturbated?
什么
What‐‐ with the...
欲见真♥主♥需纤尘不染
You must come to Allah clean.
自从上次你射♥精♥后你洗过澡吗
Since you ejaculated, have you showered?
洗了
Yeah, yeah.
赞美真♥主♥
Hamdullah.
你确定吗
Are you sure?
内♥裤♥上也没沾上吗
No drips in your drawers?
真♥主♥的旨意
Inshallah.
我是说没有
But‐‐ but yeah.
真♥主♥的旨意没沾上
Like, insh‐ as in "inshallah, yeah."
跟平常人们说的那个意思不一样
It wasn't, like‐‐ like, sometimes people say it
他们的意思是否定我的意思是肯定
'cause they mean no, but I meant, like, yeah.
赞美真♥主♥
Alhamdulillah.
我们做礼拜吧
Let us pray.
真♥主♥至大
Allahu akbar.