拉米

Ramy S02E01

Part 1 May 31, 2020, 7:49 p.m.

前情回顾
穆♥斯♥林♥配对
拉米你和穆♥斯♥林♥女孩交往过吗
Ramy, have you ever dated a Muslim girl?
没有过所以我才要试这个
No, I‐I haven't. That's‐‐that's why I'm doing this.
我想找一个不一样的人
I'm trying to meet someone, you know, different.
实话实说我这一趟来
To be perfectly honest, I made the intention
准备见很多人目的就是为了结婚
to meet with multiple people for the purpose of marriage.
《古♥兰♥经♥》你背下来了多少
How much of the Quran do you have memorized?
那些经典段落
You know, the classics.
每次我快要活明白的时候
Every time I get close to figuring something out about myself,
就会展开恋情或者做蠢事
I end up in a relationship or doing something stupid.
真♥主♥至大
Allahu akbar!
你看起来是个好男人
You seem like one of the good ones.
我想做个好人
I'm trying to be good.
今天我接到一通
I received a phone call today
在清♥真♥寺认识的人打来的电♥话♥
from a guy I knew from the mosque.
原来你在和他的妻子萨尔玛偷♥情♥
Apparently, you have been, uh, seeing his wife, Salma.
你的意思是
You're all like,
"我会做这些事但我不做那些事
"I do these things, and I don't do these things,
所以我是这种人" 对吗
so I'm this kind of person," right?
这都是鬼迷心窍
It's a trick of the devil, bro.
我想了解我是谁
I want to know who I am.
我想去探索
I want to explore.
这一天我已经等了很久了
快来人
Help!
等会儿想出去走走吗
Do you want to hang out later?
我可以换身衣服我们出去逛逛
I could change, and we could go somewhere.
好啊好好
Yeah, yeah, cool.
那是你堂妹
Bro, that's your cousin.
好性感赶紧搞定她
Hot! Lock it up!
"她是我堂妹" 你听不懂吗
What part of "she's my cousin" don't you get?
我们是堂兄妹
We're... cousins.
我在睡觉
I'm sleeping.
妈我在睡觉别吵
你在搞什么
What the fuck, man?
-你们回来了 -什么
- You guys are back home? - What the‐‐?
大哥你从埃及回来以后
Dude, you haven't talked to any of us
就没跟我们联♥系♥过
since you got back from Egypt.
伊♥斯♥兰♥国的中心就在那吧
Center for ISIS?
屋里有精♥液♥味儿
Smells like come in here.
你干嘛抱着史蒂夫
Dude, why are you holding Steve?
-你家楼梯又没有坡道 -他皮包骨头
- You don't have a ramp. - He is a bag of bones,
但还挺重的
but he's a heavy bag of bones.
-你跟你堂妹上♥床♥了吗 -冷静点
- Did you fuck you cousin? - No. Calm down.
拉米没有跟他的堂妹发♥生♥关♥系♥
Ramy didn't fornicate with his cousin.
他只是因为爷爷去世太伤心了
He's just sad that his grandpa died.
对吧拉米没发♥生♥关♥系♥吧
Right, Ramy? You didn't fornicate?
对我没有跟我堂妹发♥生♥关♥系♥
Yeah, no, I didn't fornicate with my cousin,
我跟任何人都没发♥生♥关♥系♥ 好吗
and I'm not fucking anybody, all right?
很抱歉最近没跟你们联♥系♥
I'm sorry that I haven't been hanging out with you guys.
我只是发生了很多事
I've just, um‐‐you know, a lot happened,
我我需要时间消化一下
and‐‐and‐‐and I've been processing.
消化你是说打飞机吧
Processing? You mean jerking off?
-不是 -不是什么不是
- No. - What do you mean "no"?
你妈妈说你没去工作
Your mom says you're not working.
你说你也没跟人上♥床♥
You say you're not fucking.
那就肯定是打飞机了
So you're obviously jerking off.
你为什么要去问我妈
Why are you talking to my mom?
你看起来就像一坨屎知道吗
You look like shit, okay?
你看着又像是胖了又像是瘦了
Somehow you got fatter and skinnier at the same time.
我都不知道你是怎么做到的
I don't know what the fuck is going on.
拉米你看起来精神非常空虚
Ramy, you don't seem spiritually connected.
你有每天祷告五次吗
Are you praying five times a day?
他每天检阅五架飞机还差不多
He's jerking off five times a day.
我要吸氧
Air me.
来了使劲吸
There you go. Bring it home, buddy.
我也得吸点
I think I need that too.
好了
There you go.
我不知道你们伊♥斯♥兰♥教有没有心理医生
Listen, I don't know if Islam has interventions,
但是你需要振作起来
but get your shit together.
你现在就是滩烂泥
You're a fucking mess.
我要把他放回轮椅上了
I'm gonna get him back in his chair.
看着你都恶心
You disgust me.
走吧史蒂夫
Come on, Steve.
垃圾
Bitch.
拉米自从你回来
Ramy, you haven't been going to Friday prayers
就没参加过周五的礼拜
since you've been back.
我希望你跟我一起去见见伊玛目
I want you to come with me to see the imam.
我和你妈妈跟他聊了聊
Your mom and I talked to him.
你和我妈一起跟伊玛目聊了聊
You talked to the imam with my mom?
是啊视频聊天
Yeah, we FaceTime.
天呐
Oh, man.
你这屋子需要开开窗户了
Oh, you got to open up a window in here.
闭上眼睛
Close your eyes.
要我唱歌♥给你听吗
You want me to sing to you?
拉米
第二季第一集
愿你平安
As-salamu alaykum.
你好愿你平安亲爱的
Hello. Alaikum salam, habibi.
见到你很高兴
Good to see you.
谢谢你同意见我
Thanks for seeing me.
你不是要离开这个清♥真♥寺吧
You're not leaving the mosque, are you?
不不我不是要离开这个清♥真♥寺
No, no. I'm not leaving the mosque.
起初我并不想来的
I‐‐I really didn't want to come at first,
但我开始觉得
but I've been starting to feel like
或许我该找个人谈谈
I maybe should talk to somebody.
是的你妈妈说你最近没去上班
Yes, your mom says you haven't been going to work.
自从你爷爷去世后你就一直萎靡不振
You are feeling sad since your grandfather passed?
不我
No, i‐‐
没错我是很伤心
I mean, yeah, I'm upset about that.
但我觉得是个更大的问题
But...I think it's a bigger problem‐‐
一个已经困扰我多时的问题
like, a problem that I've had for a while,
也许我之前没有意识到
and maybe I didn't realize it,
或者恶化了但是
or maybe it's gotten worse, but...
感觉每次我快要
It feels like every time I get close
活明白的时候
to figuring something out about myself, I...
就会展开恋情
end up in a relationship...
肉体上的恋情
like, a sexual relationship.
不仅是上♥床♥ 还有
And it's not just sex. It's‐‐it's‐‐it's...
还有黄♥片♥
it's also porn.
很多很多的
Like, a‐‐like, a lot of‐‐
行了行了够了
Okay, okay, okay, okay. Enough.
不需要说太多细节好吗
We don't need too many details, okay?
-好 -我知道解决办法
- Okay. - I know the solutions.
首先每晚阅读《古♥兰♥经♥》最后三章
First, read the last three surahs of the Quran every night.
这能把魔鬼挡在外面
It will help keep the shaitan away.
其次我需要你全天候都保持小净
Second, I need you to maintain your wudu throughout the day.
这能让安♥拉♥时刻存在于你心中
It will help keep Allah on your mind at all times.
上厕所的时候小净
You go to the bathroom, you make wudu.
放屁后立刻小净不要犹豫
You pass gas, you go make wudu right away, no hesitation.
这很重要
This is very important.
最后试试斋戒
Lastly, try fasting.
不吃饭
If there's no food,
就没有能量搞那些有的没的
the other things do not get so much energy.
我试过很多这些方法
Okay, um, I've tried a lot of these things.
我在斋月期间一直做礼拜斋戒但我还是
Like, I've prayed and fasted all Ramadan, and I still‐‐
那就学我们的先知
So be like our prophet.
我们的先知不看黄♥片♥ 学学先知
Our prophet did not watch porn. Be like a prophet.
可是先知没有黄♥片♥可看
It's just the prophet did not have porn, so‐‐
先知就是先知
The prophet is the prophet.
我得走了
I gotta go.
你也该去上班
And you should go to work!
拉米愿你平安兄弟
Ramy! Salams, bro.