老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）

How I Met Your Mother S02E12

Part 1 Oct. 30, 2020, 3:51 p.m.

Kids, you remember my first day with Robin.
孩子们你们还记得我跟罗宾的第一次约会的吗
I think I'm in love with you. What?!
我想我爱上你了什么
Well, here's the thing, normal people,
事情是这样的正常人
you know, people who aren't your dad,
你知道除了你♥爸♥我以外的人
usually take longer to say "I love you."
通常需要较长的时间才会说"我爱你"
Robin went through the usual stages.
罗宾就是按部就班的那种
Spider! Spider! I left something in the hallway.
蜘蛛蜘蛛我有东西落在走廊里了
Where? Right there.
在哪就在那
Got it.
搞定了
First there's the moment when you think you think it.
最初你意识到自己开始想到这句话
Whoa, still alive.
噢还在动弹呢
There's the moment you think you know it.
之后你发觉你确实是爱他的
Oh, you don't want to kiss me, you'll get sick.
哦别亲我你会被传染的
Totally worth it.
绝对值得
There's the moment where you know you know it,
再后来你确定了自己的心
but you can't yet say it.
却还说不出口
All right, it's getting to be that time.
好了时间差不多了
I'll talk to you tomorrow?
我明天再打给你
Good night.
晚安
Good night.
晚安
Wait, Ted?
等下泰德
Yeah?
咋了
Good night.
晚安
Well, great, I'll see you then.
恩好的到时候见
Bye, sweetie.
再见亲爱的
Hey. Guess what?
嘿你知道吗
My sister Katie is coming to visit next weekend.
我妹妹凯蒂下周末要来玩
She gets in on Thursday.
她周四就到
That's awesome. You know what I'm going to do?
太棒了不如这样吧
I'm going to take off work Friday.
我周五请个假
We're gonna take her to the Empire State Building.
我们带她去帝国大厦
Really? You'd do that?
真的吗你肯这样做哦
Of course. Everyone should see the Empire State Building.
当然了每个人都该参观一下帝国大厦
And then there's the moment where you know you know it,
然后就在那一瞬间你确信自己爱他
and you can't keep it in any longer.
而且等不及要让他知道
Ted. Yeah?
泰德嗯
Falafel.
三明治
Falafel? Falafel.
三明治吗三明治
Instead of telling Ted you love him, you said "Falafel"?
你想告诉泰德你爱他却说了"三明治"
I totally choked. I just don't get it.
我一时语塞我就不明白了
Why can't you tell Ted you love him?
告诉泰德你爱他有什么难的
Oh, come on, this is a big deal for me.
哦拜托这对我来说是件大事
Oh, God, you'd think you never said it to a guy before.
哦天哪弄得跟你之前从来没跟男人说过一样
No.
不是吧
Ok well I usually don't get this far in a relationship
好吧其实我的恋情一般都到不了这个阶段
I usually take the 3 weeks' exit.
通常到了三周的出口我就下高速了
Don't tell me you're
别告诉我你真♥相♥信
actually buying into Barney's freeway theory.
巴尼的高速公路理论
Watch your steps when you get up kids',
站起来的时候要小心脚下哟孩子们
cause I am about to drop some knowledge.
因为我要散播知识啦
Relationships are like a freeway.
恋爱就像是高速公路
Wait a minute, a month ago you
等一下一个月之前
told me relationships are like a traveling circus.
你告诉我恋爱就像是巡回马戏团
No, this is new. This trumps that.
不这个是新的这个完爆那个
Freeways have exits. So do relationships.
高速公路有出口恋爱也是一样
The first exit, my personal favorite, is six hours in.
第一个出口也是我最喜欢的在六小时之内
You meet, you talk, you have sex,
你们相遇聊天做♥爱♥
you exit when she's in the shower.
她洗澡的时候你就可以撤了
So every girl you have
所以每个姑娘跟你做♥爱♥之后
sex with feels the immediate need to shower?
都会立刻想洗澡吗
Actually, yeah, I get that.
哦不用回答我明白了
The next exits are four days, three weeks, seven months--
之后的出口分别在四天三周和七个月
that's when you guys are gonna break up, mark your calendars.
这也是你们分手的日子记得标在日历上
What?
什么啊
Then a year and a half, 18 years, and the last exit--death.
然后是一年半 18年以及最终出口死亡
Which, if you've been with the same woman for your entire life,
其实如果和同一个女人在一起呆了一辈子
it's like, "Are we there yet?"
你就会想"还没到吗"
So I've never been on the freeway this long before.
所以我从来没在高速上开过这么远
I mean, usually by now I find
我是说通常这阶段
out the guy has some weird personality thing
我就会发现对方有一些奇奇怪怪的地方
that makes me want to take the next exit.
然后在下个出口走人了
Yeah, been there.
对我是过来人
I once dated a guy who could only
我曾经有个男朋友
go to the bathroom when classical music was playing.
只有放着古典音乐的时候才能上厕所
Okay, it was Marshall.
好吧那是马修
It's just things are going so
我和泰德现在进展的很好
well with Ted I just don't want to complicate it.
我只是不想要把它弄复杂了
Relax, it'll happen when it happens.
别担心该来的自然会来
Which is also the advice I gave
对于马修的古典音乐问题
Marshall to get him over the classical music thing.
我也给了刚好一样的建议
Oh, here comes Katie.
哦凯蒂来了
Aw, your sister's so cute. Yeah.
哇你妹妹真可爱是吧
This reminds me of when I used
这让我想起以前
to see her coming up the driveway from school,
从学校接她回家的时候
with her little pigtails and her Hello Kitty backpack.
她扎着小辫子背着Hello Kitty的书包
Hello, Kitty. Oh, no.
你好呀 Kitty 哦不
No. No. No.
不不不要
Hey, Robin. How are you? Oh, good. Good.
嘿罗宾好吗哦好好
So, who is this... tongue person?
那么这位... 舌君是谁啊
Robin, this is my boyfriend Kyle.
罗宾这是我的男朋友凯尔
Looks like hotness runs in the family.
看来这是个美女世家
Oh, you said that. Great.
哦瞧你说的嘴真甜
So how long have you two been...?
那么你们从什么时候开始...
Two whole months. Yeah.
整整两个月了对啊
He's actually coming to visit family in New York, too.
实际上他也是来纽约探亲的
Isn't that great?
很棒吧
My cousin. He's 23, kind of a wad, but he buys me beer, so...
我表哥 23岁可以说是一团糟不过他能给我买♥♥啤酒所以...
That's cool. This is my friend Lily.
不错这是我朋友莉莉
Hot.
辣妹
You say things!
你还真会说啊
Well, come on, let's get
来走吧
you back to my place, we'll get you settled.
我带你回我那儿收拾安顿好
Um, actually, I'm going to stay with Kyle tonight.
恩实际上今晚我要去和凯尔住
Uh, no, you're not. Oh, come on.
呃不不行哦拜托
It's kind of a special night.
今晚是个特别的日子
If you know what I mean.
你懂我的意思吧
What?
什么
Oh. Oh...
哦哦...
I can't believe my baby
不敢相信我的宝贝妹妹
sister is planning to lose her virginity to a...
要把她的初夜献给一个
...douche with a faux hawk.
梳着小贝头的脑残
This can't happen.
这不行
You guys have to help me talk her out of it.
你们要帮我劝住她
Speech to talk a girl out of having sex.
劝女孩儿不要做♥爱♥的词啊
Yeah, I don't have any of those.
一点也想不出来
Discouraging premarital sex is against my religion.
不支持婚前性行为有违我的信仰
Please? I'm her older sister.
求你们了我是她姐姐
I'm supposed to teach her
我应该要教她
how to make good and responsible decisions.
做出明智负责的决定
It’s 2:00 and you've already had three scotch and sodas.
现在是半夜两点你已经灌下去三杯苏格兰威士忌和苏打水了
That's why I need your help.
所以我要你们帮忙啊
Robin convinced Katie to stay with her that first night.
罗宾说服凯蒂第一天晚上在她家住下了
And the next day, I took everybody to the Empire State Building.
第二天我带大家去了帝国大厦
You guys are lucky you came here with an architect.
你们能和一位建筑师一起来真是太幸运了
Empire State Building fun fact number one:
帝国大厦的小趣闻第1条
When construction began on March 17, 1930,
大厦在1930年3月17日开始动工后
the framework rose at a rate of four and a half stories per week.
大厦构架的建造速度为每周建四层半
Four and a half stories per week.
每周建四层半
Four and a half stories per week.
每周都建四层半呢
There it is. There it is. Come on.
这样才对这样才对嘛拜托