老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S02E08
Part 3
Oct. 30, 2020, 3:51 p.m.
Judges are people. People go to the batoom.
法官是人 人有三急
A judge is bound to come by eventually,
总会有一个法官路过这里的
and we'll get married.
然后我们就能结婚啦
I'm sure we won't be waiting long.
我相信我们不会等太久的
Geez, you go to a vending machine for 30 seconds.
天哪 去贩卖♥♥机才30秒的时间
Vultures.
这群强盗
What?
你要干嘛
Here?
在这里吗
Yeah. Got a little time to kill.
是啊 消磨点时间嘛
Oh, my God, it's the T-shirt, isn't it?
老天 是这件衣服作祟 对吧
No.
不是啊
A little.
一点吧
Something is seriously wrong with you.
你绝对是神经搭错了
So what, is that a no?
然后呢 不想做吗
All right, let's do it. All right.
好 做吧 这就对了
Um, also...?
呃 还有那个
Yes, I'll leave it on. Sweet.
行 我穿着 真好
Guys, let's bail. This is never gonna happen.
伙计们 咱们还是走吧 这永远不可能发生的
Look, I know this is turning into a bit of a disaster,
听着 事情到这地步是有点棘手了
but believe me, it's better than the alternative.
但相信我 不这么做的后果更糟
You throwing a big, free party with lots of booze and food
你筹办一场盛大的免费派对 满是美酒美食
and all your single, desperate girlfriends from college?
还有你所有绝望单身的大学闺蜜们在场
Yeah, glad we dodged that bullet.
对 真高兴我们躲过了那个"灾难"
Judge! Judge, come on. Come on, come on, come on!
法官 法官大人 等下 别走 你们快来啊
Turn it off. Okay.
关了它 好的
May we please get married today?
请让我们今天就结婚可以吗
Now, normally I would say no to a request like that,
通常情况下 你们这种请求我都会拒绝的
but you two impress me.
但你们两个令我印象深刻
Just the fact that you've been together for ten years,
就说你们两人长达十年的厮守
standing by each other's side through thick and thin,
肩并肩在一起 共度美好时光也共渡难关
never wavering.
从未动摇过
What was that? What was what?
刚刚那是什么 什么是什么
That little look. What was that?
那个眼神 怎么回事
A look of love.
充满爱的注视啊
You two have stood together through thick and thin, right?
你们俩是肩并肩在一起同甘共苦的对吧
You know, what's thick, Yeah, I mean,
你说 什么算甘 对啊 我是说
what's thin? -all... yeah.
什么算苦呢 全部都 那个
I have.
我一直在
All right, what was that look?
够了 现在这眼神又是什么
What's going on?
到底发生了什么
They broke up over the summer.
他们在夏天分手了
Lily totally ran off to San Francisco
莉莉擅自跑去旧金山了
and these two just had sex in the closet.
还有 这两位刚刚在储藏间里激♥情♥了一番
What? We're under oath.
怎么了 我们宣过誓的
No, we're not.
我们什么誓也没宣过
Yeah, we are. He's a judge.
有啊 我们宣过誓 他可是法官啊
Wh--did we take an oath?
我们宣过誓吗
Do you even know what an oath is?
你知道什么是宣誓吗
Uh, yeah. Courthouse.
当然 这里是法♥院♥
Oath. We're under it.
法♥院♥就是誓约 我们在法♥院♥之下
Guys. It's looking like this isn't gonna happen.
同志们 看来今天是没戏了
No, Marshall, we are gonna get married today.
不 马修 我们今天一定会完婚的
Baby, anyplace we go, we're gonna need a marriage license.
亲爱的 不管去哪儿 我们都需要结婚证啊
Except international waters.
除了公海
So-so let's find a ship captain.
那 我们找个船长吧
A ship captain can marry us.
船长能给我们证婚
There's boats all over this place.
这里到处都是船
Oh, is that what those
喔 你说的船是指那些
wooden things are floating between the garbage?
漂浮在垃圾中间的木板吗
This is a great idea. This is gonna work. Let's go.
这主意太棒了 一定能成 我们开始吧
Excuse me. Are you a ship captain?
不好意思 你是船长吗
This is my machine.
这机器是我的
I should go talk to her. No, let me.
我得和她谈谈 不用 我去就行了
Blackjack? Yeah.
玩21点不 好主意
Well, I found a guy who said
哦 我刚找到个男的
he'd be willing to put his boat in my slip,
他说他愿意把他的小船置于我的双腿之间
so we're getting closer.
总之我们离目标又近一步
Okay, Lil, why is it so important to do this today?
好了 莉莉 为什么非得今天结婚不可呢
Because... if we don't do it today,
因为 如果今天不能结婚
I just know we're gonna wind up having a huge wedding
我就要筹办一场盛大的婚礼
with a huge crowd full of huge Midwestern people
邀请一大批来自中西部的客人
looking all disapproving and judging me
一双双眼睛里都写满责难和反对
while sipping little cups of mayonnaise
一边盯着我一边从小杯子里吸蛋黄酱
and-and cracking runaway bride jokes all night long.
还有一整晚都调侃落跑新娘的笑话
Nobody's gonna do that. No, they're not
没人会这样做的 他们不会这样的
because I'm not gonna give them the chance.
因为我绝不会给他们机会
I'm gonna find a ship captain and we're gonna be married tonight.
我要找到一位船长 今晚就把婚结了
Sweetie, this is crazy.
亲爱的 这太疯狂了
You're never gonna find a ship capt...
你不可能找到什么船...
Hey, Lily. Found a ship captain.
嘿 莉莉 我们找到船长了
What? Yeah.
什么 没错
First guy we talked to. Ship captain.
我们搭讪的第一个人 就是位船长
How great is that?
还能再巧合点吗
See? See, this is destiny.
看到没 这是天意啊
So, captain, can you take
船长 你能载我们
us out to international waters and marry us?
到公海并为我们证婚吗
I sure can.
当然可以
If there's two things I love,
如果只能选两件我最喜欢的事
it's bringing people together in marriage
就是为人们证婚
and making $5,000. What?
并且赚5000美元 什么
Deal. $5,000, okay, we can do that. Come on, everybody.
成交 5000美元 我们接受了 快点 各位
Fork over your cash. Don't think. Just do it.
把你们的现金都交出来 别犹豫了 快交出来
I can get us that money.
我有办法弄到这些钱
How?
什么办法
Have you noticed that all day today
你们今天有没有注意到
Chinese guys have been coming up and saying hi to me?
一直有中国佬过来跟我打招呼
Yes. Have you noticed I haven't asked about it
当然 那你有没有意识到我一直没问你为什么
because I'm too scared of the answer?
因为我太怕听到答案了
Well, those are my old gambling buddies.
好吧 他们其实都是我以前的赌友
Truth is... I used to come here all the time.
事实上 我曾经不分昼夜地呆在这里
Play an old Chinese game called "Shing Hasabu Shing".
玩一种中国的古老玩法"行还是不行"
Had a small gambling problem.
后来有一点点上瘾
Actually, it wasn't so small. I...
其实 不止一点点 我
kind of lost my entire life's savings.
基本上输掉了我所有的积蓄
But tonight, I don't know, I'm feeling hot.
但是今晚 我就是觉得 手气一定不错
I think I can win us that money.
我想我能赢得那些钱
No, we're not letting you gamble all our money away.
不行 我们可不能把所有的钱都拿给你去赌
Uh, it's not gambling if you absolutely know you're going to win.
呃 如果你知道自己一定会赢 就算不上是赌了
I'll get us that money.
我会赢得那些钱的
I swear it, nay...
我发誓 不
I oath it.
我宣誓
Now, I had been to a lot of casinos before that night,
在那晚之前 我去过很多赌场
and I've been to a lot of casinos since,
之后也去过不少赌场
but in all that time I've never seen a game quite like this one.
但我从来都没有见过像这样的赌法
To this day, I have no idea how it was played.
一直到今天 我都不明白那到底是怎么玩的
But luckily, Barney did.
但幸运的是 巴尼懂
Do you understand what's happening?
你弄清楚这是在干嘛了吗
Not a clue.
毫无头绪
Do you think he's winning?
你觉得他是在赢吗
I don't even know if he's playing.
我连他开始赌了没有都不知道
Wait, I get it. I understand this game.
等等 我知道了 我知道怎么玩了
No, you don't.
你才不可能知道
I totally understand the game, Theodore.
我完全知道怎么玩了 西奥多
Barney, split your tiles.
巴尼 把你的筹码都押上
You can triple your money if you find the jellybean.
如果你能找到那个软心豆粒糖就能赢三倍的钱
Marshall, please. Don't you think I know what I'm...
马修 别吵 你以为我不知道自己在干什么吗
My God, you're right.
天哪 你说的对
Wow. It's beautiful.
哇 真美啊
Thanks, Barney.
谢了 巴尼
Did you guys see me? I was on fire tonight.
你们看到了吧 我今晚手气挡都挡不住
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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