十字剑

搏一把 -好吧
Tempt fate! - Okay.
埃里克 我要搏一把 -那好
I'm gonna tempt fate, Eric! - Alright then!
拼出"橡木棍"这个词
Spell the world "shillelagh".
你能造个句吗
Can you use it in a sentence?
当然可以
Of course I can!
我引用这句 "拼出'橡木棍'这个词 埃里克说道"
Quote, "Spell the word 'shillelagh, ' said Eric."
好吧 橡木棍
Okay. Shillelagh.
西-岸-么-务-哥-万
S-H-A-I-L-E-N-E-W-O-O-D-L-E-Y.
戈尔比
Gorby!
杰里 是谁来了
Who is it, Jerry?
杰里 你告诉他是一个
Jerry, you can tell him it's a no-fun squire
搞垮气氛的无趣的侍卫
who really brings the room down
和一个让你又爱又恨的更像是反英雄的
and a rascally rogue who's more of an anti-hero
无赖流氓
you love to hate.
不是吧 杰里 请暂停一下
Ah, no. Jerry, take five, please.
独角 我要请你还我人情
I'm calling in my favor, One Horn.
你知道我说的是哪次
You know the one I mean.
你想先结♥帐♥吗 我看你只有两件东西
You wanna go in front of me? You've only got, like, two things.
我有100件
I got, like, 100
如果算上这罐子里的每颗橄榄
if you count every olive in this jar.
谢了 我欠你个人情
Thanks. You know, I owe you one.
我就知道我会搬起石头砸自己的脚
I knew that would come back to bite me in the ass.
告诉我们精灵都在哪混呢
Tell us where the Leprechaun Gang is hiding out!
不可能 如果他们发现我泄密了
No way! If they find out I squealed,
会给我"四叶草"的
they'll give me the Four Leaf Clover.
也就是用剃刀在我脸上刻个加号♥
That's when they carve a plus sign into your face with a razor,
然后把我撕成四瓣
and then peel each quadrant back.
天啊 要不还是别逼他说了
Jesus! Maybe he doesn't have to tell us where they are.
帕特里克 比起让老鼠啃掉你的脸
The Four Leaf Clover's a walk in the park
"四叶草"就是小菜一碟
compared to getting your face eaten off by rats, Patrick!
妈的 是啊
Oh shit! Yeah,
把我"四叶草"吧 哪天都行
give me a Four Leaf Clover any day of the week.
真妙
Great.
抱歉 库尔特 但我今天只能帮你一个忙
I'm sorry, Kutter, but I can only do you one favor today.
迅速地杀了你
Killing you real quick.
骡子踢
Mule kick!
该死
Ah, damn it!
等等 停下
Wait! Wait, wait, wait! Stop!
精灵帮藏在第五大道的"一罐金"餐厅
The Leprechaun Gang's laying low at the Pot O' Gold Restaurant on 5th!
就说找埃里克
Ask for Eric!
就是嘛 有这么难开口吗
There. Was that so hard?
下次我在收银台见到你
Next time I see you at the checkout line,
你休想再插队
you aren't cutting in front of shit!
再见了 无角
See you around, None Horn!
你对我做了什么 我现在只是一只马了
What have you done?! I'm just a horse now!
一只该死的蠢马
A stupid fucking horse!
我替这只独角兽感到难过
I feel bad about that unicorn.
他的自尊肯定与他的角有很大关系
You know, I bet a lot of his self-worth was tied up in that horn.
帕特里克 别同情那个混♥蛋♥
Don't cry any tears for that piece of shit, Patrick.
他经营着一个非法的斗马场
He runs an illegal horse fighting ring.
但他也是马 为什么要这么对自己的同类
But he is a horse. Why would he do that to his own kind?
谁都知道马的等级制度是这样的
Everyone knows that the horse hierarchy goes
独角兽 飞马 斑马 展演马
unicorns, pegasuses, zebras, show horses,
赛马 劳工马 迷你马 小马
racehorses, labor horses, mini horses, ponies,
驴 骡 然后是二等马
donkeys, mules, followed by your second tier,
雌独角兽 雌飞马 雌斑马...
lady unicorns, lady pegasuses, lady zebras...
马的文化可真是糟粕
Horse culture is really toxic.
我赢了个骷髅头
I won a skull!
不错
Alright.
我不怕 我服侍的是史上最好的国王
I'm not worried. I work for the best king ever,
他可能正在制定救出我们所有人的计划
and he's probably working on a plan to save all of us right now!
再高点 我们马上就能打败兰迪了
Just a little higher! I think we've almost got Randy beat!
你就永远地举着吧
Now, just hold it there forever.
操♥他♥妈♥的
Jesus fucking Christ!
是奶酪火锅店 我有约会的场所了
Wow, a fondue place. Now I have somewhere to bring dates.
当然了 孩子 就想着约会
Sure, kid. Dates.
那个女人长得好像你照片里那个
Hey, that woman looks like the lady in your painting.
杰姿琳
Jazlyn!
杰姿琳
Jazlyn?
所以这就是我的替代品
So, this is my replacement, huh?
你好啊 库尔特
Hello, Kutter.
你好 很高兴见到你
Oh, howdy! Pleased to meet you!
我是布鲁斯
My name's Bruce.
你的亡妻... 还活着
Your dead wife... is alive?
我从没说过她死了
I never said she was dead!
但你显然是这个意思
It was strongly implied.
她对我来说已经死了
Well, she's dead to me.
死了 我也快了
Dead! Just like I'll be soon.
听到没 杰姿琳
You hear that, Jazlyn?!
见到你总是很开心
Always a pleasure.
好疼
That hurts!
帕特里克 救我们
Patrick! Help us!
输掉游戏节目的惩罚是被变成奶酪
The punishment for losing the game show is being turned into cheese!
你们上了"三叶草大决战"的当
Someone fell for the Shamrock Showdown.
我们来"煮"决这事吧 糟糕
Let's fon-due this. Oh no.
我们的搭档关系成功了
This partnership was a success.
祝你下次好运 贱♥人♥
Cheddar luck next time, bitch.
镇上最破败的地方有传言说
Word around the janky part of town
你在找精灵埃里克
is you're looking for Eric the Leprechaun.
那我有些坏消息
Well, I've got some bad news.
你找到他了
You found him.
看起来挺豪达[一种奶酪] 混♥蛋♥
Looking Gouda, motherfucker!
不 不要
No, no! No, no!
给我
Gimme that.
真烦人 用刀来对付我们啊 你这个白♥痴♥
That's just annoying! Get us with a blade, you idiot!
我脸上的器官都被砍到了
It's got all my face organs!
我们干掉了精灵帮
We took down the Leprechaun Gang!
我不是在吹牛
Not that I'm bragging
我们本来就比他们更大更强
as we are much larger and stronger than them.
谢谢你救了我们
Thanks for saving our lives.
你知道我们也会为你这么做
You know we'd do the same for you.
你们今天早些时候就没有
You literally didn't earlier today.
没错 我们无可救药了 总之
Ha! Right. We're incorrigible. Anyway,
改天见吧 小饼干
I'll catch you on the flip-flop, tim-tam!
再见 帕特里克
Bye, Patrick!
你们抓到我了 我们现在来玩...
You caught me! Now, let's play...
把金子给我们 否则打到你开花
Give us the gold or I'll kick your nuts up through your mouth hole!
好吧
Fair enough.
你杀了我约会对象的好几个家人
Well, you killed several members of my date's family.
我今晚连指交的机会都没了 真是谢谢了
I'm unlikely to even get finger-banged tonight. Thanks a lot.
别这么说他 他只能活几分钟了
Hey, leave him alone. He has minutes to live.
他还在搞那一套呢
Oh, is he still doing that routine?
我这次是认真的
I mean it this time!
好吧 所以你没把解药挂在脖子上
Okay, so you're not wearing the antidote on a chain around your neck?
去你的 杰姿琳
Fuck you, Jazlyn.
我兑现诺言了
Contract fulfilled.
这是你要的一大罐金子
Here's your giant pot of gold.
就这 也太小了吧
This is it? It's so small.
对我来说很大 你个巨人怪
Well, it's giant to me, you sizeist motherfucker!
肯定会有巨大的人觉得你很小
I bet there are giant people somewhere who think you're small!
是啊 他们就叫巨人
Yeah. They're called giants.
有想过他们才是正常大小吗
Ever consider that they're the normal ones?
所以你就是非常非常小
So that would make you extra-extra tiny?
根据传递性 当然了 赶紧出去吧
Well, by the transitive property, sure. Now, get out!
我被打败了
I'm a defeated man.
这些都是什么
What's all that?
这些宝石非常不吉利
Ooh, those gems are bad luck!
负四个三叶草
Negative four shamrocks,
是我们最低的运气等级
our lowest luck rating.
我能拿一些吗
Can I have some?