开心汉堡店

Bob's Burgers S02E08

Part 1 March 11, 2020, 8:59 a.m.

好了我希望你们都选好了
Okay, everyone, I hope you've all chosen
- 自己的实验搭档 - 我选好了
- your lab partners wisely. - I have.
看到在你面前煤气喷灯上的混合药剂了么
You'll notice a mixture in front of you on the Bunsen burner.
屁屁生
Buns... sen.
这种混合药剂是人类已知
This mixture is the most powerful
药效最猛的春♥药♥
love potion known to man.
无论如何不能喝
Whatever you do, don't drink it.
小Jimmy 不要它会让你
Jimmy Junior, no! It will make you
- 想要摸别人的屁♥股♥ - 太晚了
- want to touch each other's butts! - Too late.
我不用喝春♥药♥都能和你
I don't need a love potion to want to do that stuff...
干这事
with you.
Chad没有搭档
Chad doesn't have a partner.
也许他能加入你们
Maybe he can join you.
人越多越好
The more the merrier.
孩子们
Kids...!
- 吃早饭了 - 可恶
- Time for breakfast! - Damn.
什么样的疯子会提前一小时起床
What kind of a maniac wakes up an hour early
- 来写色情同人小说啊 - 我
- to write erotic fan fiction? Me.
世上还有没被你玷污的
Are there any shows or movies left in the world
- 电视剧和电影了 - 没了
that you haven't perved up? No.
所以我开始写基友小说了
That's why I've started writing erotic friend fiction.
让学校里的人和僵尸一起搞
Using people at school and zombies.
哦让门卫和副校长搞吧
Oh! Do the janitor and the vice principal.
我觉得他俩的孩子肯定很漂亮
I think they'd have beautiful children.
我让他们搞了结果不漂亮
I did and they don't.
早上好晚起的小鸟你衣服上是什么
Good morning, my little late bird. What's with the vest?
“欢迎新同学”背心
It's my Welcome Wagon vest.
今天我要带新来的女孩参观学校
I'm showing a new girl around school today.
嗷嗷 Bob 这是我们今天晚上要看的那个
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, Bob, this is what we're seeing tonight! Ugh.
体验不一样的拍手歌♥
Experience patty cake like never before.
拍手歌♥ 纽♥约♥时♥报♥说拍手歌♥荒废了
Cake. The New York Times says, "Cake makes everything
我们用手能做的一切
we've been doing with our hands obsolete."
本周码头艺术中心战争是个屁
This week at the Wharf Arts Center. War Farts!
不开玩笑谁去谁傻
Wow. What a must-miss. No kidding.
闭嘴必须去
Stop it. We're going.
去看拍手歌♥喽
Let's get to Cake Ugh.
这是食堂
This is the cafeteria,
这是食堂里的阿姨嗨
and there's the Cafeteria Lady. Hi.
那是国旗
And that's our American flag...
Tina 无意冒犯但这次参观
Tina, no offense, but this tour
只给我假高♥潮♥ 给我看点好东西吧
is giving me a snore-gasm. Show me something good.
午餐菜单上有错别字布朗尼写成了布郎尼
Well, there's a typo on the lunch menu. It says "Browie."
说真的你们在这有什么好玩的
Seriously, what do you do for fun around here?
我觉得Tina之旅的内容应该比这丰富啊
I think there's more on the Tina tour than you're showing me.
好吧还有个我喜欢去的地方
Okay. There is one place I like to go.
这是神马东东啊
What is this?
男更衣室你只能看到他们脚踝以下的地方
The boys' locker room. You can only see up to their ankles.
你就随便找个洞看
So, you just go around looking through random holes?
是的但现在不是了现在我就看这个洞
Yes, but not anymore. Now I just look through this one.
那是小Jimmy的脚看他走路那样我就知道
Those are Jimmy Junior's feet. I can tell by the way he walks.
这么自信啊但还在想事情
So confident, but still figuring things out.
- 哈 - 别闹 Zeke
- Ha! - No, Zeke!
- 屎渍 - 这可不好玩
- Skid marks. - That's not funny.
这是条纹裤臭臭的条纹裤
They're stripes. Smelly stripes.
- 你好臭 - 好吧这又是谁
- Phew, you stink! - Okay, and who is that?
Zeke 他对他的尿布有点亢奋
Zeke. He's got some hyper in his diaper.
- 我要看看胫骨上面是什么 - Tammy 不要
- I'd like to see what that shin bone's connected to. - Tammy, don't.
- 会有人看见我们的 - 这发生什么了
- Someone might see us. - Hey, what's going on in there?
嗨 Blevins教练
Hi, Coach Blevins.
我不敢相信我居然留堂了
I can't believe I got detention.
又不是什么大事 Tina 别没事扯咸淡了
It's no big deal, Tina. Don't have a crap attack.
因为打架留堂真是太衰了
Sucks they give you detention for wrestling in the library.
- 这是哪啊尼加拉瓜 - 是啊学校真衰 Zeke
- What is this, Nicaragua? - Yeah, this school's lame, right, Zeke?
这是小Jimmy和Zeke
That's Jimmy Junior and Zeke.
更衣室那两双脚就是他俩的
The feet from the locker room.
嗯够凶猛
Mm, manimal.
介绍下我吧
Introduce me, okay?
- 给你 - 哦
- Here. - Oh. Mmuh, mm...
嘿小Jimmy Zeke
Hey Jimmy Junior! Zeke.
这是Tammy 新来的
This is Tammy. She's new at school.
- 嘿你 - 嗨你好么
- Hey, What's... - Hi, what's up?
我的标志
My loog.
你喜欢吗宝贝
You like that, baby?
不喜欢
- No. - Nice loogie, Zeke.
嘿小Jimmy 看这个
Hey, Jimmy Junior, look at this.
我没事
I'm okay.
Tina 你跑哪去了
Tina! Where the hell have you been?
你把什么闪光的东西掉嘴唇上了吗
Did you fall in something shiny on your lips?
嗯草莓味的呢
Mm. Strawberry.
- 我留堂了 - 留堂
- I got detention. - Detention?!
- 真的啊 - 我不信
- Really? - I can't believe this!
留堂又没什么妈妈别没事扯咸蛋了
Detention is no big deal, Mom. Don't have a crap attack.
你刚才说什么
What did you just say?
咸蛋我木有
A crap attack. Don't have one.
你还敢教训我不要扯咸蛋
Don't you tell me not to have a crap attack!
咸蛋我爱怎么扯怎么扯你马上给我回屋去
I'll have a crap attack any time I want! Now, go to your room!
这真是个假高♥潮♥
This is such a snore-gasm.
这都是什么玩意
What the hell was that about?
- 什么咸蛋么 - 我不知道你知道么
- What is it? Yeah. A crap attack? - I don't know. Do you?
- 别看我 - 你刚才说想扯的啊
- Don't look at me. Well, you're the one that wanted to have one.
你刚才因为她说了这句话
You're the one that sent her
- 才把她撵回房♥间的啊 - 我不知道
- to her room for saying it. - I don't know what
- 这些孩子在说什么 - 别扯咸蛋了
- these kids are saying. - Don't have a crap attack.
好啊你 Bob 很好
Nice, Bob. Nice.
我不敢相信Tina居然留堂了
I can't believe Tina got detention.
她变了 Bobby Tina长成少女了
She's changing, Bobby. Tina's turning into a teen.
你失去她了妈妈是时候该关注你一下你的乖女儿了
You've lost her, Mom. Time to focus on your good daughter.
- Gene - 我很漂亮哦
- Gene. - I'm pretty.
也许你有点反应过度了 Lin
You know, maybe you're overreacting, Lin.
- 我是说你确实扯咸蛋了 - 哈
- I mean, you did have a crap attack. - Ha...!
我们今晚去看拍手歌♥ 她应该在家看孩子的
She's supposed to baby-sit tonight while we're at Cake.
- 现在还能信任她吗 - 问得好
- Can we even trust her now?- That's a good point.
- 或许我们就该呆在家 - 什么
- Maybe we should stay home.- What?
- 拜托 - 我们不能不去看拍手歌♥
- Please?- We're not skipping Cake.
好吧随你但我会全场都在抱怨
Okay, fine. But I'm gonna complain the whole time.
太棒了
Yeah!
你是留堂里面最坏的女孩了 Tina
You're the baddest girl in detention, Tina.
- 严重同意混♥蛋♥ - 我是混♥蛋♥
- Tell me about it, stud. - I'm a stud.
- 我是白♥痴♥ - 我知道 Zeke 别说了
- I'm an idiot.- I know, Zeke. Don't talk anymore
Tammy 倒那个
Tammy, spill that.
小Jimmy 用你裤子把地擦干净
Jimmy Junior, mop that up with your pants.
- 好的 - Tina
- Okay. - Tina!
我们在等你
We're waiting for you!
我们得复习一下晚上的规矩大嘴巴小姐
We need to go over some ground rules for tonight, Miss Mouthy.
不许男孩来不许派对办不许召唤鬼神
No boys, no parties, no summoning spirits
不许角色扮演还有不许
or switching bodies, and no filling the house
在屋子里吹泡泡听见了没 Tina
with soap bubbles. You hear me, Tina?
听见了妈妈我戴的是眼睛不是助听器
Yes. I wear glasses, not hearing aids, Mom.
- 呵 - 我也没带助听器
- Ho! - Well, I don't wear a
所以我没听见
hearing aid either, so I didn't hear that.
- 哈 - 晚安
- Haw! - Well, good night.
你拿着应急手♥机♥干什么呢
What are you doing with the emergency cell phone?
给我朋友Tammy发短♥信♥ 要花很多钱的
Texting my friend Tammy. That'll cost a fortune!
话费单子很可怕的
We have a terrible data plan!
Tammy想过来我给她回了个笑脸
Tammy wants to come over. I texted back a smiley face.
她会了几个我看不明白的字
She texted back some letters I don't understand.
- 我觉得她要来了 - 神啊她是来还是不来啊
- I think she's coming over.- Oh, my God, is she or isn't she?
我等不及要
I can't wait to ha...
Louise 醒过来 Louise
Louise, wake up, Louise!
唉
Ugh.