艾伦对决法罗（2021）

我说 对不起 真对不起
I said, "I'm so sorry. I'm just so sorry."
有时候他还会说
And sometimes he would say, you know,
我真的觉得你需要帮助
"I honestly think you need help."
然后我开始想 我一定是疯了
And I began thinking, well, I must be crazy.
他不可能是恋童癖 当然不可能 我想什么呢
He can't be a pedophile. Of course, what am I saying?
天哪
Oh my god!
他是我男朋友啊 而且我
He's my boyfriend and I,
我爱他 我了解他 也应该信任他
and I love him and I know him and I must believe him.
我想相信他不是我担心的那种人
I wanted to believe that he was not capable
也不是我看到的那样
of what I feared, you know, what I was seeing.
我希望相信他是无辜的
I wanted to believe that it was in innocence,
那只是他对孩子的真情流露而已
and that it was just being affectionate.
我只想
And I just wanted...
我希望这是真的
I wanted that to be true.
他是我爱的那个人
He's the man I love.
他是伍迪啊
He's Woody.
他绝不会伤害孩子们
You know, he would never hurt the children
或者伤害我们的家庭
or hurt our family.
有一天在公♥寓♥里
One day in our apartment building,
有个著名的精神病医生
there was a very famous psychiatrist.
她叫埃塞尔·培森
Her name was Ethel Person,
一个非常有名的令人尊敬的心理学专家
I mean, much-printed, very respected therapist.
她打给我说
And she called me, and she said,
米娅 我看到了一些事
"Mia, I saw something of Woody,
是伍迪和你女儿迪伦打招呼的方式
the way he greeted your daughter, Dylan."
我问是吗 她说
And I'm like, "Yeah?" And she said,
有点不对劲 然后我就
"There was something off." And I'm like...
我按捺不住了
Then the floodgates opened for me.
她看到这件事
The fact that she saw this,
我以为他会听进去
I thought that he would listen,
就是他真的会觉得这是个问题
you know, and that it would really mean something to him.
于是我想让他去见
So I asked, and he agreed
她推荐的一个医生 他当时也同意了
to see a person she recommended.
心理治疗师告诉我
The therapist told me that
他的行为是不适当的
the behavior was inappropriate,
但并非跟性相关
but that it wasn't sexual.
别人和我 还有孩子们
It could be perceived as sexual by others,
可能会以为这跟性有关
by me, and even by the child.
但其实并不是
But it wasn't sexual.
只是因为他从未跟孩子们在一起相处过
It was just that he had never been around children,
而那只是他表达喜爱的方式
and that it was his way of expressing affection,
他得学会如何和孩子们打交道才行
and that he must learn how to behave with a child.
如果他再做这种事的话 治疗师让我跟他说
And when he would do things, the therapist told me to say,
你能别再那么做了吗 然后他就会跟我说
"Could you not do that?" And he then would just say,
我只是想表达自己的喜爱之情
"I, you know, was showing affection.
与性无关
Never for a second was any of it sexual."
他解除了我的焦虑
And he relieved my anxiety
他说 你是对的
by saying, "You know, you're right.
你看到一些事 很高兴你告诉我了
"When you see something like that, it's good if you tell me,
我不会再对你生气了
and I won't get mad at you anymore."
我当时觉得这件事已经控制住了
And I felt it was under control.
所以我想 事情可能是朝好的方向发展了
So, I thought things, things would get better.
有一段时间看起来真的是这样
And for a time, it seemed that way.
我很清楚地意识到
Woody: I decided in a moment of clarity
不被看做是迪伦和摩西的合法父亲
that not being the legal father of Dylan and Moses
是不可接受的
was just not acceptable.
这么多年来 对他们俩
For years, I had assumed full responsibility
我一直都尽到了父亲的责任
for both of them as their father.
最逗的是 米娅一直都想让我
Interestingly, for someone who always wanted me
成为她孩子们的父亲
to father her child,
可是当我提出来的时候
Mia was suddenly very cool to the idea
她竟然拒绝接受我收养迪伦和摩西的想法
of me adopting Dylan and Moses when I broached it.
我对此表示怀疑
Mia: I had felt a little strange about it.
他以前提过一次
He had mentioned it before,
但是我说我觉得这不是个好主意
but I said I just didn't think that would be a great idea.
这一步迈得太大了 但是在他进行心理治疗期间
That just was too big a step, but once he was in therapy
他说他不会再生我气了
and said he wouldn't get mad at me anymore
于是我 我就觉得
and, um, that, that I felt, um, that...
也许她能有个父亲是件不错的事
maybe it'd be great if she had a dad, you know.
也许是件好事
Maybe it'd be a great thing.
只要没有其它问题就行
As long as everything else was okay.
我甚至问过法官
I actually said to the judge,
我不会失去什么吧
"I'm not giving up anything, am I?"
法官说当然没有 你得到了更多
And the judge said, "No, you're gaining something."
然后伍迪说他想收养摩西
And then Woody said he wanted to adopt Moses.
他是家里唯一一个
He was the only other child in the family
没有父亲的人
that didn't have a father.
于是我问摩西
So, I asked Moses
他愿不愿意被伍迪收养
if he would like to be adopted by Woody,
摩西高兴地快跳起来了
and Moses was over the moon.
我之所以同意他收养孩子们
The reason I let him adopt them
是因为我想到他是我一辈子的伴侣
was 'cause I thought that he was my life's partner,
我对未来充满信心
and I believed in our future.
我们会继续这样下去
And that we were gonna go on,
拥有一个完美的人生
you know, and have a wonderful life.
有一天我在他的公♥寓♥
One day, I was at his apartment
因为那天我不用工作
because I wasn't working that day,
于是我带了其中一个孩子过去 因为我们落下了一件衣服在那
so I took one of the kids over that we left a coat over there.
然后在电♥话♥旁边
And there by the side of the phone,
电♥话♥的边
to the right of the phone,
有一摞照片
was a stack of Polaroid pictures,
一个女孩的
of pornographic pictures of...
色情照片
a woman, a girl.
我拿起来看了才发现
And I picked them up, and I realized
里面的女孩是宋宜
all of them were of Soon-Yi.
是我自己的孩子
It was my own child.
她当时大学一年级
She was in her first year of college.
这些照片
And they were all just like...
它们不是《花♥花♥公♥子♥》上的那种照片
I mean, they wouldn't put them in "Playboy."
它们
They were like...
我不知道 像是是《好色客》上的那种
I don't know, "Hustler" pictures or something.
非常 非常 非常下流的照片 我
You know, really, really, really raunchy pictures, and I...
我当时
I, you know...
我 我只记得
I-I-I just remember--
我记得自己都快喘不上起来了
I remember struggling to breathe.
我记得
I remember, um...
带着我儿子
um, get-getting my son...
我想把衣服给他穿上 扣上扣子
um, trying to put his coat on, trying to do the buttons.
我拿走了照片
I took the photos,
把它们放进了我的衣兜里 我 我就离开了
and I put them in my pocket and I-- I was leaving.
然后我意识到 我甚至
And then I just realized that I don't even think
甚至没办法按电梯按钮
I could push the elevator button.
我一直在发抖
I was just, like, shaking.
我把孩子带回了家然后锁上了门
And I took my child home and I locked the door.
宋宜在家 我记得我跟她说
Soon-Yi was home, and I remember saying,
我发现了这些照片
"I found the pictures."
她问 什么照片
And she said, "What pictures?"
我说 伍迪拿走的那些
And I said, "The pictures Woody took."
然后她开始大哭 我也开始大哭
And she started crying and I started crying.
然后我说 不 不 这不是你的错
And I'm like, "No, no, it's not your fault."
她就在那里一直很懊恼地哭着
And she was just beside herself.
米娅让我进去和宋宜聊聊
Casey: Mia asked me to go in and talk to Soon-Yi.
米娅这么说 我就过去了
And I did do that because Mia said,
我现在太难受了 我觉得我没办法和她说话
"I'm so upset right now, I don't think I should talk to her.
你能进去跟她谈谈吗
Will you go in and talk to her?"
米娅对宋宜非常宽容
Mia was very forgiving of Soon-Yi.
她说 他年长你许多 很有经验
She said that, "He's an older man, very much experienced,
你可能根本不知道
"and you would have no idea
如何抵挡他的诱惑
how to resist his overtures."
接下来我知道的就是
Mia: And the next thing I knew,