白金狂人（2017）

Great, thank you.
好吧 谢谢你
I still don't know what I'm doing.
我还是不知道我在做什么
Use your initiative.
你自己主动点想想
And when that fails, plug every fucking joint with mastic.
如果那还不行的话 把他妈每个连接点都用胶泥糊上
That should hold long enough to get Robbie in a toff school.
那应该能支撑到Robbie上高级学校
Meanwhile
与此同时
omething was seriously wrong in the estates of Corringham.
在科灵厄姆地区发生了一些很不对劲的事情
I believe you asked for someone to come around
我记得您说过需要人上门
to talk you through our range of windows and doors.
向你们介绍我们的门窗产品
Oh, sorry, I saw your colleague yesterday.
对不起 你们同事昨天来过了
Seeing as though we're back in the area
既然我已经来了
I might as well come in, give you a free quotation.
不如我进去 免费为您做一个报价
Do you remember the name of the rep who called around?
您还记得之前来的那位销♥售♥人员的名字吗
Yeah, it was Joe.
记得 叫Joe
So, did Joe leave any of our leaflets with you?
那Joe有给您留一些宣传册吗
Signed the order yesterday.
昨天签的合同
OK, well, if you're sure, I'll cancel the appointment.
好的 如果您确定 我会帮您取消预约
OK, bye.
好的 再见
Traitor. What did you call me?
叛徒 你说我是什么
Oh, sorry, I thought you'd hung up!
噢 不好意思 我以为您已经挂了
This is the least professional...
你是我见过的最不专业的
What's going on?
这怎么回事啊
That's the fifth cancellation today.
这是今天取消的第五个预约
I'll tell you what's going on, some prick called Joe at W-windows
我来告诉你发生了什么 窗-窗业一个叫做Joe的混♥蛋♥
has been cold-calling every fucking house on our patch
冷不防地上门拜访了我们地盘里的每一幢房♥子
and stealing our leads.
抢了我们的订单
Well it's definitely not Walshy
肯定不会是Walshy
he couldn't sell a 12-year-old's knickers to a kiddie fiddler.
他连给恋童癖卖♥♥12岁小孩的内♥裤♥都卖♥♥不出去
Well, I'm not having this,
我可忍♥不了
it's about time I introduced myself to this Joe goon.
我要去会会这个叫Joe的傻♥逼♥
I mean, if we haven't got honour amongst salesmen,
如果我们连在销♥售♥圈都没有尊严了
what have we got?
我们还有什么
Incredible levels of self-delusion?
极强的自我欺骗能力
Yeah, fuck you, Martin.
滚你♥妈♥的♥ Martin
Hello. Yep, just give me a minute.
你好 稍等一下
No need, I'm here for the organ grinder, not the monkey.
不用了 我是来见管事的 不是前台
He just happens to look like an ape.
他只是碰巧长得像个猿人
Sorry, sir, he's not here.
不好意思 先生 他不在
Can I help?
有什么可以帮你的吗
Yeah, you can pass a message on to your boss.
是的 帮我给你老板传个信
Tony Walsh? Yeah.
Tony Walsh吗 是的
And for the underhand shit-for-brains pond life he's got working for him.
还有他找来的脑子有屎的傻♥逼♥手下
If they want a war,
如果他们想要一场战争
they better be prepared for it to go nuclear.
他们可要做好承受核武器的准备
If it does go nuclear, bagsy sharing a bunker with you.
如果真的有核战争 我要求和你共享一个地堡
Just pass on the message.
你把消息传到就行了
Who should I say called by? He'll know.
怎么称呼您 他会知道的
Well, he may well do.
是的 他会
What do I call
那我怎么称呼
this immaculately dressed, handsome, young firebrand stood before me?
站在我面前的这位服饰考究 英俊惹火的年轻人呢
Are you fucking with me?
你在和我搞笑吗
Joanne Scott. Head of sales.
Joanne Scott 销♥售♥主管
Thanks for asking, and, no, not fucking with you.
谢谢你的提问 不 并不想搞你
Not yet anyway.
至少现在还不想
You're the fucking lead thief.
你♥他♥妈♥就是贼头
The penny finally drops!
你终于发现了
Well, if you're the finest Cachet has to offer
如果金牌窗业就你这个水平
it's no wonder I'm cleaning up around town.
就别怪我把这个镇子洗劫一空了
Oh, I haven't even begun to get warmed up yet, sweetheart.
噢 我还没开始热身呢 亲爱的
Oh, I know. I know,
噢 我知道 我知道
but you're Mr Thermonuclear, the man with the red-hot missile,
但你是氢弹先生 拥有激♥情♥导弹的男人
ready to wipe me out.
准备把我消灭
Maybe, before we unleash mutually assured destruction on one another,
但在我们像约定的那样毁灭对方之前
we should go out with a bang.
我们应该先来一发
Come on, Vincent
来吧 Vincent
you understand the first rule of warfare better than anyone
你比任何人都知道什么对战争最重要
"Know your enemy".
"知己知彼"
What are you doing?!
你想干什么
I'm giving you the opportunity to know every inch of your enemy.
我在给你了解你敌人每一寸的机会
Right now.
就现在
I don't think so.
我不觉得
Even if I wasn't happily married Sure you are.
即使我没有与世界上最好的 当然你有
..To the most sensational woman on the planet,
女人结婚
It's not happening. Oh, it is.
这也不可能发生 噢 它在发生
You've got some front, I'll give you that.
你有种 算你厉害
I mean, maybe not today or the next day
可能不是今天或者明天
but, trust me, it's happening.
但是 相信我 它正在发生
Now, is that an Intercontinental ballistic missile you keep in your pocket
所以 那是你装在口袋里的洲际导弹吗
or are you pleased to see me?
还是你见到我真的很高兴
Ah. I see you've met my new head of sales, Vincent.
啊 看来你已经见过我的销♥售♥主管了 Vincent
I had to shell out a fucking fortune to get her on board,
把她捞过来我可下了不少本钱
but it'll be worth every penny to wipe that smarmy smile
但只要能把你们脸上虚伪的笑容抹去
from off your smug fucking chops.
我花的每一分钱都是值得的
Now, if you wouldn't mind fucking off,
现在 如果你不介意快点滚的话
we've got a successful window business to run.
我们还有成功的窗户生意要做
Toodle-pip.
拜拜喽
At least with the dating agency
至少在婚介公♥司♥
there's a paper trail in case of going missing.
如果你失踪了会有纸质记录
Sorry, I don't want you to get the impression
不好意思 我不想让你觉得
that I only picked you because you're the least likely to kill me.
我选择你只是因为你杀我的可能性最小
Well, I do, obviously, but...
但显然 我就是这么想的 可是
Can we just drop this subject?
我们可以换个话题吗
I literally haven't said a word.
我真的一个字都没说
Sorry. I'm really nervous.
不好意思 我真的很紧张
I want you to know,
我想让你知道
I feel really shitty about showing everyone your tape, Brian.
我真的很抱歉把你的录像给所有人看了 Brain
Oh, look, it's fine, OK?
噢 没事的 好吧
I understand, you thought I was cheating on Maureen.
我知道 你以为我欺骗了Maureen
Who? Oh, Thyroid.
谁 噢 甲状腺肥妹
So...here we are.
所以 就这样
Yeah.
嗯
What is it that you do?
你是做什么的
What do you mean? For a living?
你是指什么 做什么工作
What are you doing? Small talk.
你在干什么 闲聊
But you know what I do.
但你知道我做什么工作
Well, it's really hard being on a blind date with someone you know really well.
好吧 和非常熟悉的人相亲真的很难
You ask me something.
你问我些什么啊
All right, um, have you ever been in love?
好吧 呃 你之前谈过恋爱吗
Well, I'm not answering personal questions.
呃 我不回答私人问题
OK, uh...
好吧 呃
Do you want to go home? Yeah, please.
你想回家吗 好的 太好了
Probably just chalk this one up as a bad idea, shall we? Agreed.
或许我们可以达成共识这是个坏主意 同意
Do you think we should have a compatibility shag at least?
你觉得我们要不要至少打个测试兼容炮
What? Sex, Brian.
什么 做♥爱♥ Brian
We might discover some as yet undetected physical chemistry.
我们可能发现一些还没探测到的身体上的化学反应
Right, yeah, well, I mean,
啊 好 是的
you know, I guess it's always a good idea
我觉得排除掉这些可能性总是好的
to rule these things out, or in.
或者肯定这个可能
You never know, we might...
谁知道呢 我们或许
Oh, we won't.
噢 我们不会的
But I haven't really got anything else
但是我在给视频婚介公♥司♥的回执单上
to say on the feedback form for the video agency.
还真的没什么东西可以写
While I can hardly expect a medal for not cheating on my wife,
尽管我并不指望没有对妻子出轨能让我获得一个奖牌
I am allowed to enjoy being good for once.
我终于享受了一次做好人的感觉
Hello, my gorgeous.
你好啊 美人
Honestly, what would you say this is? A prawn cocktail.
别撒谎 你觉得这是什么 大虾鸡尾杯
Yes! Right, come and have a look at my beef Wellington.
太好了 对了 来看看我的威灵顿牛排
All right, but we'll have to be quick,
好的 但是我们要快点
the Browns will be here in half an hour.
Brown一家半个小时后就要来了
That's actually pretty funny for you. I aim to please.
你今天有些不正常哦 我想要取悦你