外星也难民

because our alien bodies process it differently.
吃起来像糖 我自己做的
It's just like sugar. I make it myself.
雅姆莱克 有了 我应该自己建一个玻璃屋顶
Yumyulack, that's it! I should make a glass ceiling myself.
-然后再打碎它 -拜托
- And then I'll break it. - Hey, come on.
这可是你自己开窍的
I didn't help with that epiphany.
我只是像我们平时那样吃着可♥卡♥因♥
I'm just eating cocaine like we usually do.
-别把我扯上 -谢谢你的帮助 雅姆莱克
- Leave me out of it. - Thanks for your help, Yumyulack!
住口 我要和我的影子打一架
Stop it! I'm gonna go fight my shadow!
帕秋莎 你一定讨厌我们在"南银窝"坐一整天
Ah, PATRICIA, I bet you hate how we sit in the "manc ave" all day
而你却在这里享受不到"南银窝"
while you're up here not enjoying the "manc ave."
脏盘子
食物残渣计数 1752
触发电视版沮丧主妇模式
检测到蠢男脸
愚蠢程度 100%
这些脏盘子是怎么回事 科尔沃
What's with all the dirty dishes, Korvo?
我留给你清洗的
I left them here for you to clean.
看到这个了吗 它叫做洗碗机
You see this here? It's called a dishwasher.
这个是开机键
And this is how you turn it on.
现在至少终于有一样东西你能学会开机[性奋]了
Now that's at least one thing you can finally learn to turn on.
虽然无关紧要 因为你们外星人没有屌♥
Not that it matters since you're an alien who has no dick.
我想我妈说得对 我还能玩出什么花样
I guess my mom was right. What am I supposed to do with that?
屌♥都没有
No dick!
没人这样对我说过话
No one's ever spoken to me like that.
这个愤怒的主妇子程序一定是你
This angry wife subroutine must be a side effect
反"南银窝"程序的副反应
of your anti-"manc ave" programming.
或许我只是厌倦了给一个把脏袜子
Or maybe I'm just tired of being married to an idiot
丢在客厅的傻♥逼♥当老婆
who leaves his dirty socks in the living room.
这一定是我灌输给你的那些电视版妈妈数据的
This must be a byproduct from all the TV mom data
副产品 你简直是个完美有机体[高♥潮♥]
I fed into your personality. You're a perfect organism.
副产品 你挣的钱连帮我"付"产品都不够
Byproduct? You don't make enough money to buy me any products.
我唯一一次高♥潮♥是我看《古战场传奇》的时候
And the only time I can organism is when I'm watching Outlander.
你让我觉得好渺小 枉为男人
You're making me feel smaller and less of a man.
我喜欢 快点 再来
I love it. Quick, do it again.
你做任何事都只知道快
Quick is the only way you know how to do anything.
巨婴的眼泪
注意到干坏事了
触发电视版呵护妈妈
帕秋莎 我把桌足杆插肩膀上了
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, PATRICIA. I foosed my shoulder.
宝贝 让我帮你处理下吧
Aw, honey, let me take care of that for you.
一 二
One, two--
-好点了吗 -一点点
- Does that feel better? - A little.
你刚才真是个勇敢的小男孩
You were a really brave little man just then.
我真为你骄傲 亲亲
I'm so proud of you. Here.
这是妈咪给你的特别亲亲 感觉好点了吗
That was a special kiss from Mommy. Does that feel better?
-再来一个好吗 -啵啵 宝贝
- I need another one. - There you go, sweetie.
你猜怎么着 这个妈咪肯定是我表现英勇的
I tell you what, this mommy must be a residual byproduct
副产物
of me being so brave, huh?
我在里面烤曲奇呢 宝宝来 舔勺勺
I'm baking cookies in here. Does baby wanna lick my spoon?
我天 这种感觉是什么
Oh, my God, what is this feeling I'm feeling?
我希望能永远这样下去
Oh, I never want it to end.
酷孩子社团 禁止女生参与 自带阳♥具♥
你去哪了
Where have you been?
我 我去做了这份美味的圣代
Oh, oh, uh, just making this delicious sundae.
-你自己做的 -是啊
- By yourself? - Uh-huh.
特里 你在撒谎 你连香蕉都不会剥
Terry, you're lying. You don't know how to peel a banana.
-每次都是我给你剥 -等等
- I always have to do it for you. - Wait.
为什么你耷拉着肩膀
Why are your shoulders slouched
为什么你看起来自信心不足
and why do you look like you have a lower sense of confidence?
我照着镜子打量自己 感觉很羞耻
I was judging myself in the mirror. I'm-I'm very shameful.
可你连自我审视都不会
You don't know how to self-scrutinize.
我刚刚和帕秋莎在一起 她让我体会到了
I've been hanging out with PATRICIA. She makes me feel something
-前所未有的感觉 -我也是
- I've never felt before. - Me, too.
-被削弱[阉♥割♥] -被抚爱
- Emasculated. - Nurtured.
我太爱了 她用刀子嘴兵不血刃地划穿了
I love the way she can just cut right through me
我的豆腐心 我从未感到如此挫败
with a real tightly wound zinger. I've never been so wonderfully beta.
她用湿纸巾给我擦嘴 拿我当宝宝疼
Oh, she wipes my mouth with a wet wipe and treats me like a baby.
又舒服又熨帖 我从没有过妈妈 科尔沃
It's so comfortable and nurturing. I never had a mom, Korvo.
-从没人给我洗澡澡 -特里 我知道我们
- I never got baths. - Terry, I know we specifically
造她是为了让她憎恶"南银窝" 但听我说
created her to hate the "manc ave", but hear me out on this.
如果我们改变"南银窝"的相关设定
What if we altered the rules of the "manc ave"
让帕秋莎和我们一起来"南银窝"玩怎么样
so we could invite PATRICIA to hang out with us in the "manc ave"?
-就两全其美了 特里 -老天 没错
- We'd have it all, Terry. - Oh, my God, yes.
完美 快 快改设定
Oh, that's perfect. Let's, let's change the rules.
我们来改设定
We're gonna change the rules.
可 可我憎恶这个地方
But, but I hate this place.
我知道 我知道 但没事 你看
I know, I know, but it's okay. Look, huh, see?
你在这里没事的 这是不是很有趣
It's okay for you to be here. Isn't it fun?
不 这没趣 趁还来得及赶紧走 快跑
No, it's not. Get out while you can. Run.
别理那条鱼 它在开玩笑呢 在扯淡呢
Ignore that fish, it's joking. It's not serious.
它在抬杠呢
It's just having a jab.
大粗吊
帕秋莎 我要求你覆写憎恶"南银窝"的设定
PATRICIA, I demand you overwrite your hate of the "manc ave."
覆写 覆 写[骑在头上]
Override, ov-er-ride...
搞笑 你永远都不能骑在我头上
funny, you never ride me over.
憎恶 南银窝 大粗吊
Can't-love-manc-ave-dig-old-bicks
必须毁灭南银窝
Must destroy manc ave!
你给她装了火箭发射器
You gave her rocket launchers?
用它们造机器人会容易一些 特里
It's harder to build a robot without them, Terry.
它们的承重能力很好
They're load-bearing.
大粗吊 我现在明白了
Oh, dig old bicks. I get it now.
-你明白了 到底什么意思 -我不知道
- You do? What, what does it mean? - I don't know.
必须憎恶南银窝
*我有老虎一般的眼睛*
*I got the eye of the tiger*
*在火中起舞*
*I am dancing through the fire*
*胜者是我*
*I am the champion*
*你会听到我的怒吼*
*And you're gonna hear me roar*
*比狮子的咆哮还要响亮*
*Louder, louder than a lion*
*因为胜者是我*
*'Cause I am the champion*
拜托 停一停 左边第二扇门
Oh, no, please, stop. Second door on the left.
不
Oh, no.
抱歉 请让我过去 女权主义女英雄来了
Excuse me, pardon me. Female feminist hero comin' through.
男士们 请让一让 我 一位女子
Move aside, men. I, a woman,
来此打碎玻璃天花板
have arrived to topple the glass ceiling
把父权砸个稀烂
and shatter the fuck out of the patriarchy.
我们在找建立这个社团的男孩 他叫杰茜
Yeah, we're looking for Jesse, the guy who set up this club.
我可要告诉你们 杰茜不是个男孩
Well, I've got news for you. Jesse isn't a boy.
他是个女孩 就是在下
He's a girl, and it's me.
等等 这是你的社团吗
Whoa, whoa, whoa. This is your club?
是 但很抱歉 这到底不是个男子社团
Yep, sorry, but this isn't a boy club after all.
我们不想加入
We don't wanna join.
我们是为了抗♥议♥才来的
We're here in protest to speak up for all the women
为所有不能为自己发声的女性发声
who are too weak to speak for themselves.
-但我建这个社团是为了 -你懂不懂
- But I made this club to-- - Do you have any idea
性别歧视
how messed up it is to discriminate against people
-有多糟糕 -我懂
- based on their gender? - Uh, yeah.
在你打断我之前 我刚要说这个的
I was just about to say that when you interrupted--
我有两个姐妹 没什么比厌女症更能激怒我了
As the brother of two sisters, nothing enrages me more than misogyny,
而这就是厌女症
and this is misogyny.
-这不是 -这是
- Uh-huh, it's not. - Yes, it is.
你必须马上把这个社团注销
You need to shut this club down right now.
不行 我还没打碎父权呢 我评分要用的
No, not before I topple it. I need it for my grade.
如果她不动手 我们就得亲自来了
If she's not gonna do it, we have to tear it down ourselves.
求求你们 停下来
Please, stop.
让我们在她让女人们感到不安全之前灭了她
Let's get her before she creates an unsafe environment for all women.
-不不不 -她要逃
- Oh, no, no, no. - She's running.
-这说明她有罪 -愤怒的暴徒 兄弟们
- That means she's guilty. - Angry mob, bros.
她在毁掉我唯一热爱的有关人类的东西
She's ruining the only thing I actually liked about humans.
-我们得阻止她 -要我说 我们就抓住她
- We need to stop her. - Okay, I say we just grab her
让她送我们上♥床♥ 给我们讲故事
and make her tuck us into bed and read us stories.
我们不能直接抓住她 特里 她会用激光刃
We can't just grab her, Terry. She'll slice us in half
-把我们切成两半 -这是谁的错啊
- with her laser blades. - And whose fault is that?
我不知道该怎么办
Huh? I don't know what to do.
等等 如果她憎恶"南银窝" 我们得把她
Wait, if she hates the "manc aves," we need to lure her
引到我们能找到的最大最蠢的"南银窝"
to the biggest, stupidest "manc ave" we can find.
我知道该去哪了
I know just the place.