外星也难民

I can just vape the onion steam.
你们好啊 耳机不错
Hey, you guys. Cool headphones.
你们在听什么 性♥爱♥吗
What are you listening to? The sex?
我有话要跟你说
I need to tell you something.
这张桌格调被拉低了
Ugh, this table's weak now.
我们去给耳机充电和撸管吧
Let's go recharge our headphones and jerk off.
好的 兄弟们 保持水准哦 我爱你们
All right, fellas, keep it tight. I love you.
我是说 行吧 都被你搞砸了
I mean, okay. You just blew that for me!
我本来都融入他们了 这是我的酷小孩桌
I was totally in. This is my cool kid table.
你得自己找酷小孩一起玩啊
You gotta find your own cool kids to hang with.
-比如那些人 -那些是酷小孩吗
- Like, those guys. - Those are cool kids?
是啊 我听说Lady Gaga
Yeah. I heard Lady Gaga
戴了同款伊丽莎白圈出席拉丁格莱美奖
wore that same cone to the Latin Grammys.
超有型的 祝你好运
So awesome. Good luck.
硬汉牌
准备好了吗
Okay, you ready?
我们和摩托艇卖♥♥家约好了一小时后见面
We gotta meet the guy selling us the Jet-Ski in an hour.
他叫特伦特 多有特伦特的风格啊
His name is Trent. I mean, how Trent is that?
特里 我快给房♥子建好防御工事了
Yes, Terry, I'm almost finished fortifying the house
以防那个红色小混♥蛋♥回来
in case that little red butthole comes back.
对哦 那我最好
Oh, right, yeah,
去封住我那些密门
I should probably seal up all my hidden doors then.
-什么密门 -只有两三扇 别担心
- What hidden doors? - I only have a couple, don't worry.
特里 那家椒盐脆饼店就是个钱坑
Terry, that Wetzel's is a money pit.
根本没有人流
It doesn't have any foot traffic.
生意要做够一年才开始盈利 知道吗
It takes a year for a business to be profitable, okay?
可是免费椒盐脆饼日马上就到了
But free pretzel day is right around the corner.
-小心我的鼻子 新做的 -操你的 克雷格
- Hey, watch the nose. It's new. - Fuck you, Craig.
听我说 你肯定不会相信的
Listen to me. You're not gonna believe this.
我刚在洗手间和两个女孩相处甚欢
I just had such a good experience with two girls in the bathroom,
-都是因为这个 -谁在乎啊
- and it's all because of this. - Nobody cares.
那是什么鬼
What the hell is that?
这就是我一直想告诉你的
That's what I've been trying to tell you.
这是我的特别小花花
It's my special flower.
-抱歉我揍了你的蛋蛋 -不
- I'm sorry I hit you in the nads, man. - No.
我才抱歉 我说你妈是肥婆
I'm sorry I called your mom fat.
我知道她只是被一群蜜蜂蛰了
I know she just got stung by a bunch of bees.
-都是因为你 -没错 都怪她
- You did this. - Yep, totally her fault.
我们要不要霸凌她
Should we bully her
逼得她决定到艺术领域发展
until she decides to pursue a career in the arts?
不 她很好
No, man, she's cool.
杰茜 你今晚来参加大派对吧
Jesse, you should come to the big party tonight.
-到时见 -没问题哟
- See you there? - Ha, you betcha.
我真不想卖♥♥掉我的心肝宝贝
I really hate that I have to sell this baby.
法♥院♥竟然逼我在她和我的孩子们中作出选择
I can't believe the court made me choose between her and my kids.
这摩托艇能做出酷炫空翻 对吧
Now this can do sick flips, right?
一定要够酷够炫哦
I mean, they have to be really sick.
酷炫到爆表 我们共度过美好时光
Oh, yeah, they're sick, dude. We had some great times together.
我只希望她能找到一户好人家
Ah, I just want to make sure she goes to a good home, you know?
红色疙瘩小人有枪
Red goobler got a gun!
只是车的回火声 有人在追杀你吗
That was a car backfiring, dude. Is someone huntin' you?
这种家庭环境我不确定
I'm not sure that's the right home environment
是否适合这样优雅的交通工具
for a refined vehicle like this.
不不不 不用担心 你看
No, no, no, don't worry, look.
我们只想要一笔不错的交易 特伦特
The only thing we're hunting for is a great deal, Trent.
我了解了
I hear that.
你们想坐上这宝贝试试吗
Hey, you guys want to sit on this honey?
-好好好 -当然
- Yes, yes, yes, yes. - Obviously.
-我先 -不 让我先 特里
- Me first. - No, I'm going first, Terry.
给爷爬
The fuck out of my way!
-你为什么非要把一切都搞砸 -这朵花力挽狂澜
- Why do you have to ruin everything? - The flower saved the day.
该死 我要告诉科尔沃和特里
Damn it, I'm gonna tell Korvo and Terry.
他们会把那朵花拔了
They're gonna chop it right off your head
然后没人会再喜欢你了
and no one will like you anymore.
不 拜托不要告诉他们
No, don't, please don't tell them.
等我回到家 我就要毁了你的生活
When I get home, I'm going to ruin your life.
如果我比你先到家就不行了
Not if I get there first.
天哪 救救我
Oh, god, oh, help me.
不
Oh, no.
他流失了太多的... 希望是血吧
He's lost too much of what I'm really hoping is blood.
不
No!
不 不
No, no!
-谢谢你救了我 -谢谢你活了下来
- Thanks for saving my life, I guess. - Thanks for not dying.
但我还是要打小报告
I'm still gonna tattle!
天哪
Ah, jeez.
-太爽了 -在水上开更爽
- Yeah. - Wait till you get her on the water.
什么 这还能在水上开
This goes on the water? What?
我感觉你们没什么问题
You know what, this feels right. Yeah.
-我就把它卖♥♥给你们了 -那我们现在要把它骑走吗
- I'm gonna sell her to you guys. - Uh, so should we take her now?
介意让我来吗
You mind if I drop her off?
我只想最后再骑它一次
I just wanted to get one last ride in.
-我打到红色疙瘩小人了 -等等 你们是怪胎吗
- I got the red goobler. - Wait, are you guys weird?
当然不是 你看
No, no, no. Look, okay.
过去二十年 我们一直在玩一个
We've been playing a game of
标记我们最好朋友的游戏
tag with our best friends for the past 20 years.
这让我们的关系更加亲密了
It's actually brought us much closer together.
晚点在我们家见吧 谢谢你的摩托艇
We'll see you at our house later. Thanks for the Jet-Ski.
你人很不错 再见
You're cool. Bye!
海绵宝宝
SpongeBob Square Pants.
抱歉 我有点失态了
Oof, I am sorry. I freaked out a little.
但好消息是 我们买♥♥到了摩托艇
But the good news is we have secured the Jet-Ski
而且红色疙瘩小人好像不见了
and it looks like the red goobler is gone.
特里 你做荷包蛋了吗
Terry, did you poach eggs?
不 我只喜欢炒蛋 煎蛋 白煮蛋 溏心蛋
No, I only like scrambled, fried, hard boiled, soft boiled,
单面煎蛋 双面煎蛋 半熟双面煎蛋 全熟双面煎蛋
sunny side, over easy, over medium, over hard,
复活节蛋 绿鸡蛋 班尼迪克蛋 麦满分和恶魔蛋
Easter, green, Benedict, McMuffin and deviled.
-红色疙瘩小人来过了 -我还喜欢烘蛋饼
- The red goobler was here! - Oh, I also like frittatas.
他怎么进来的
How did he get in?
他在对记忆海绵床垫低语 特里
He's whispering to the memory foam mattress, Terry.
他在说什么 床垫记住了什么
What is he telling it? What does that mattress remember?
他把我的《饥饿游戏》摇头娃娃拆封了
He unboxed my "Hunger Games" Funkos.
我本来还想把开箱史诺总统的视频传到油管上的
Ah, I was saving President Snow for my YouTube channel.
现在这都比不上法斯玛上尉的一半价钱了
Now it's not even worth half a Phasma.
他往我们的录像机里拷满了《国务卿女士》
He's filling up our DVR with "Madame Secretary."
-这是中年妇女看的剧 -那个混♥蛋♥
- That's a mom show. - The son of a bitch
-从冰箱里拿出了我的牛仔裤 -那是我拿的
- took my jeans out of the freezer. - Uh, I did that.
天哪 特伦特随时可能到
Oh, my God, Trent is gonna be here soon.
如果他看到这个 以为有人求我给他们口
If he sees that and thinks someone has asked me to blow them,
他就绝不可能把摩托艇卖♥♥给我们了
there's no way he's gonna sell us the Jet-Ski.
冷静点 大块头 别紧张
No, no, no, no. Easy, big guy. Don't get stressed.
他就希望这样 好吗 我们还有时间清理
That's what he wants, okay? We still have time to clean it up.
我们不能把红疙瘩小人的事告诉那些复♥制♥人
We can't tell the replicants anything about the red goobler.
我知道雅姆莱克会做噩梦
I know Yumyulack will have night terrors
最后他又会跑到我们床上睡
and he'll end up sleeping in our bed again.
-特里 科尔沃 -拜托 别告诉他们 我保证
- Terry, Korvo. - Please don't tell them. I prom...
雅姆莱克 你看
Yumyulack, look.
-我也有花了 真好看 -一般吧
- I got one, too. It's beautiful. - Meh.
我们不能让科尔沃和特里知道
We have to hide these from Korvo and Terry.
这会吓坏他们的 特里会做噩梦
It'll freak them out. Terry will have night terrors
最后他又会跑到我们床上睡
and he'll end up sleeping in one of our beds again.
什么 你不是说这一点也不特别吗
What? I thought you said it wasn't special.
是啊 但我现在也有了 所以还是挺酷的
Yeah, but now I have one, so it's cool.
-这是我们参加库珀·巴恩派对的入场券 -他们来了
- This is our ticket to Cooper Barn's party. - They're coming.
-你们今天过得怎么样 -还行
- So, how was, uh, how was your day? - Fine.
-你们呢 -也还行
- How was your day? - Equally fine.
没有什么红色疙瘩小人
Yep, there's no such thing as a red goobler.
也没有什么头花
I was just saying the same thing about head flowers.
-什么 -没什么
- What? - Nothing.
我知道早晚会有这一天 不过
I knew this day would come, but, man.
对曾经"置身其中"的东西总是难以告别
It is hard to say good-bye to something you have been inside of.
这是个比喻
I, I meant metaphorically.