皆大欢喜（2021）

皆大欢喜
第一季 第六集
《无痛》电影
蓝车选角公♥司♥
杰瑞米·戴维斯
《无痛》电影
蓝车选角公♥司♥
杰瑞米·戴维斯
智障人士
成为了一个酒鬼
慢慢变成了一个酒鬼
Slowly becoming an alcoholic.
我可以演这个
I can do this.
打印
法律帝国
-你还好吗 -挺好的 谢谢
- How are you? - I'm doing OK, thank you.
-归还吗 -是的 我要还书
- Returning? - Yes, I am returning.
你通过了吗
Did you pass?
什么通过
Did I pass?
就是你研究这些书要通过的什么考试
Whatever you were studying for with these books.
不 我 我没通过
No, I did- - I did not pass.
那真是太遗憾了
That's too bad.
你有点逾期了 费用是27美元
You're a little late. It's gonna be $27.
我 逾期还要多收费吗
I... there's a late fee?
我们图书馆推出了特别活动
Well, you know, we're running these specials at the library,
如果你能订阅信息推送
so, if you wanna sign up for a newsletter,
我或许可以抹除第一个月的逾期费
I can probably waive the first month.
我不会透露我的邮件地址的
I'd rather not give out my email.
我们不会频繁给你发邮件的
We're not gonna email you that much,
或许一个月就一次
just probably once a month.
我们有很棒的活动 你都可以来参加
We've got great events you can come to
听听作者的演讲
and hear authors speak.
我就跟你说实话吧
I'm gonna be honest with you.
我租这些书是为了打动一个女孩 好吗
I just- - I rented these books to impress a girl, OK?
但最后没有成功
It didn't really work out and, uh,
我不想再回到这里了
I don't really wanna come back here again.
-所以你是单身吗 -是的
- So, you're single? - Yeah.
好极了 我们这里有约会之夜
That's awesome, though. We've got date nights here.
你可以遇到一个很棒的女孩
You can meet a really great, nice girl.
算了 我很感激你这么热心
You know what? I appreciate that.
我 我只是...
I- - I just...
我觉得我现在跟谁交往都不会有好结果
I don't think it's gonna work out for me right now.
我眼下跟任何女性似乎都无法成功
I don't seem to be working at any level with any female at the moment.
我短期内还是保持单身吧
So, I'm gonna probably just stick to being alone for a little while
看看会有什么结果
and just see what that does for me.
好吧 那就付27美元吧
OK, so that'll be $27, though.
你想加入信息推送项目吗
Do you wanna join the newsletter?
不了
No.
我真希望你能接了这个项目
I wish you would just commit to this.
这又没什么大不了的 兄弟
It's not that big of a deal, man.
就是你人生中的四周罢了
It's four weeks of your life!
都不需要我来劝你才对
I shouldn't have to talk you into this.
它能有什么坏处 破坏你的档期吗
I mean, what's it gonna do, hurt your availability?
不是 我知道 只是
No, I know. But I just, like,
我之前对《刺影者》那个项目也不太确定
I wasn't so sure about Shadowstabbers, and- -
但我还是接了
and I took that.
-结果却不如人意 -好吧
- Didn't really go as planned. - Right.
这个项目也给我同样的感觉
And this kind of gives me that same feeling.
我真的不太确定
I'm just not really sure.
在我看来
The way I was looking at it is that
菲尔打算做剧集式的 更宏大的项目
Phil was moving onto more episodic stuff, bigger things, OK?
-网飞作品 之类的 -问题就出在这里
- Netflix, things like that. - That's the thing right there!
菲尔 菲尔·范吉尔莫
Phil! Phillip VanGilmore.
-你见过他吗 -没有
- Have you ever met him before? - No.
那家伙非要我在房♥间里操一个枕头
I mean, the guy made me fuck a pillow in a room.
是真的摩擦冲撞一个枕头
Like, actually thrust a pillow.
-那... -那个嫌疑还不够大
- It is... - Isn't that a little suspect?
-的确有点怪 -突然间 他就希望
- It's a little weird. - And he wants me, suddenly,
由我来担任他的戏剧的主角吗
to be, like, the lead of this play?
你说过你想做一些
You said you wanted to do something
更有充实感的事 对吧
a little more fulfilling, right, OK?
我觉得我们尽到了职责 在帮你去填充工作
And I think we're doing our part on filling it.
是的 不 我...
Yes, no, and I'm, yeah,
-我很感激你能... -等等 等等
- I'm grateful for you- - - Hold on, hold on.
等等 伯西
Hold on- - Bosh!
-怎么了 -你觉得菲利普·范吉尔莫这人怎么样
- What's good? - What do you think of Phillip VanGilmore?
范吉尔莫吗
VanGilmore?
他很出色 他就是下一个芬奇
He's brilliant. He's the nest Fincher.
等等 下一个芬奇吗 当真吗
Wait, the next Fincher? Really?
怎么 他是想选择塞斯出演什么作品吗
What, does he want Seth for something?
是的 我就是... 他
Uh, yeah, I just- - he's, you know,
想让我出演一部戏剧
Wants me to do a play and--
范吉尔莫想要你 你就去 好吗
VanGilmore wants you, you go, all right?
他是个出色的导演 这是个大好的机会
This is a great director, it's a great opportunity.
听你经纪人的话 我们是要帮你赚钱的
Listen to your agent, we're here to make you money!
或许你应该再考虑下
Maybe you should think about it.
我会多花点时间仔细考虑下的
I'm gonna take some time to think about it.
好吧 反正在我看来那是你想要的
All right. It sounds like to me that's what you want, anyway.
是的 我想仔细考虑下
Yeah, I wanna think about it.
好好考虑下 周末给我答复
Think about it. Get back to me over the weekend.
我觉得你想得太多了
I think you're overthinking it.
-好了 行吧 -行吗
- OK. All right. - All right?
谢谢你能过来
Thank you for coming in.
好吧
Al right.
大家好 今天我想给大家一些建议
Hey, guys! Um, today I'm gonna talk you through some tips
教你们如何照料好多肉植物
on how to look after your succulents.
很多人将多肉植物作为礼物送出去
A lot of people give these as gifts,
也有很多人收到多肉植物作为礼物
they receive them as gifts,
他们想当然地觉得多肉植物很容易照料
and they assume that they're just really easy to look after,
但其实并没有那么容易
but they're actually not that easy.
用刷子轻轻地扫一下叶片
Just lightly brush on the leaves
把虫子都清除掉
to remove any bugs.
别隔太久不清理 各位
Don't leave this too long, people,
因为这些吸血的虫子会影响
'cause those bloodsuckers... will affect
-植物的生机 -还好吗 兄弟
- the livelihood of the plant. - Hey, what's up, man?
你在看什么
What's that?
我在学如何照料格雷格
I'm just learning how to take care of Greg.
老实说 我并不太喜欢
I'm not really into it, to be honest.
-别做得太频繁了 -她很可爱
- Don't overdo it. - She's cute.
是啊
Yeah.
怎么了 兄弟
What's going on, man?
刚跟杰森见完面回来
Just got back from that meeting with Jason.
是吗 谈得怎么样
Oh, yeah, how'd that go?
他想让我出演那部戏剧
He wants me to do the play.
我说不好 兄弟
I don't know, man.
你为什么有所顾虑
Why are you having second thoughts?
该死的菲尔
Fuckin' Phil.
他逼迫我♥操♥枕头啊 老兄
He made me fuck a pillow, dude.
我怎么能信任这家伙
How can I trust this guy?
他没有逼迫你 我是说...
He didn't make you, I mean...
-你也同意了那么做的 -我感觉就像是
- You- - you agreed to do it. - It's like, I feel like
我现在对任何事都不确定了
I'm not really sure about anything right now.
我以为还不错的那部电影
The movie I thought was gonna be all right.
结果也是失败的烂片
that turned out to be a dud.
我以为莎拉是个好女人
I thought Sarah was legit.
结果她是个骗子 我很受伤
She's a fraud. I'm wounded.
我就像一只受伤的小动物
I'm like a little wounded animal.
听上去你得好好想想了
Sounds like you need to do some thinking.
得了吧 我可能就是想得太多了
Yeah. I'm probably thinking too much.
瞧瞧你现在住的地方
Well, I mean, look where you are.
这地方太吵了 兄弟
This place is so noisy, man.
你甚至无法听清自己的想法
You can't even hear yourself think.
或许我们该出去旅行一次
Maybe we should take a trip.
比如 来一段"放空大脑"之旅
Take a little, I don't know, "Clear our heads" Trip.
你懂我的意思吗
You know what I mean?
我身上发生了很多事 你身上也发生了很多事
I got a lot going on, you got a lot going on.
你觉得去哪儿比较好
Where are you thinking?