皆大欢喜（2021）

我希望...甚至都不是获得托尼奖
I'm talking I want to be- - not even the Tonys.
这是个受欢迎度竞赛
It's just a popularity contest.
我指的是东南亚实验性戏剧
I'm talking like Southeast Asia experimental shit.
我想要古怪的风格
I want to get weird, man.
我想要超级古怪的风格 所以...
I want to get super weird. So...
回家去 写 看 想 顺其自然
Go home, write, read, think, be.
-谢谢你 菲尔 -没事
- Thank you, Phil. - Yeah.
-回头见 -好的 去吧 去吧 去努力吧
- See you later. - Yeah. Go, go, go, get to work.
嘿 希艾拉 我是菲尔
Hey, Sierra? Yeah, it's Phil.
取消跟JTT的会面
Um, cancel JTT.
我忘了联♥系♥的那家伙叫什么来着
Who's the guy I forgot to call,
就是演过《我恨你的十件事》的那个
from, uh, 10 Things I Hate About You?
我还是想跟那家伙见一面
I still want to meet with that guy,
但不是让他参演这个项目
but not for this project.
买♥♥雪地靴真是太不明智了
The Uggs were a really bad choice.
你们想吃点芝士条吗
Do you guys want some string cheese?
别在我的车里吃芝士条啊
Please don't eat string cheese in my car.
你就不能等回家了再吃吗
Why can't you just wait until you get home?
因为我饿了
'Cause I'm hungry.
这是...
What is...?
这是真的吗
Is that real?
-那是什么 -当然是真的
- What is that? - Of course it's real.
-你订婚了 -是的
- You're engaged! - I am!
-这太棒了 -是不是超棒的
- That's amazing! - Isn't that so good?
-太棒了 -我很激动
- So good! - I'm really excited!
-太美了 -你为什么这么做
- So beautiful - Why- - why did you do that?
这可是件大事啊 不是吗 订婚这件事
This is a big deal, isn't it? This engagement.
我们应该庆祝一下
We should all celebrate, right?
-你们不觉得吗 -是啊
- Don't you think? - Yeah.
绝对值得庆祝 我们都是朋友
It totally calls for a celebration. We're all friends.
朋友之间会庆祝这些人生大事的
Friends celebrate these life events, you know?
你们想要
Do you want to do like, um,
喝香槟喝到饱吗
champagne rooftop thing?
-我们可以去... -杰瑞米
- We could go- - - Oh, Jeremy,
我们会办个订婚派对的
we're gonna be having an engagement party.
-是吗 -如果你别再这么无礼
- Oh, you are? - And if you stop being so rude,
也许我们会邀请你
maybe you'll be invited.
好吧 我不会去的 没什么大不了的
OK, fine, I won't come. It's not a big deal.
我只是想着我们都是朋友
I just thought we were all friends,
那样会很有意思
and it could be fun for us to...
我确实这样想 我想让你去
I do, I want you there,
我也很想让塞斯去
and I would love Seth to be there as well.
-真的吗 -是啊
- Really? - Yeah.
-塞斯绝对会去的 -是吗
- Seth would definitely go. - Yeah?
绝对的 塞斯多有爱又贴心啊
Definitely, Seth is such a loving, caring guy, you know?
他一直想着你
He thinks about you all the time,
总把你挂在嘴边
talks about you all the time.
你跟那个叫奥利弗的家伙交往多久了
How long have you been dating this Oliver guy?
六个月
Six months.
-六个月 -是的
- Six months? - Mm- hmm.
那不是很长啊 就订婚了
That's not that long, right, to be engaged?
确实不长 不过我们谈过这件事
No, it's not, but, we had a conversation about it.
我们都决定不想再等了
And we both decided that we didn't want to wait.
我能理解为什么这样做
You know, I see the logic in that.
真的 因为结婚越早
I do. Because the sooner that you get married,
越早能发现会不会离婚
the sooner you know whether or not you're gonna get a divorce.
所以 这么做有道理
So, it makes sense.
我想去吃点午饭 你们刚刚提到午饭了吗
I'm down to get some lunch. Did you say lunch?
滚下去
Get out!
好吧
Okay.
来自威尔明顿的问候
莎拉·丁西
你在哪 莎拉
Where are you, Sarah?
不不不不 什么
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, what?
不要啊
No.
-兄弟 -嗨
- Hey, dude. - Hey.
看看这个
Check it out.
-看看这是谁 -是莎拉
- Look who it is. - Oh, it's Sarah.
没错 看看她跟谁在一起
Yes. Look who she's with.
是那家伙
Oh, that's that guy.
-一个演员 -是啊
- An actor! - Yeah.
她说她不跟演员交往的
She said she doesn't date actors.
-她对我撒谎了 -我是说
- She lied to me, man. - I mean...
她那段时间一直在对我撒谎
She was lying to me the whole time.
不过这可能对你是好事
That could be good for you, though.
为什么对我是好事
Why would that be good for me?
因为她愿意跟演员交往
'Cause she dates actors.
这不是重点 她骗了我
That's not the point. She lied to me.
也许他们只是朋友 他人挺好的
Maybe they're just friends, I mean, he's cool, man.
什么叫"他挺好的"
What do you mean "He's cool, man"?
他演过《后窗惊魂》 那是部好片
He's in Disturbia, that's a good movie.
那是好电影 不代表他人也挺好
Yeah, well, that's a good movie. Doesn't mean he's cool.
你怎么知道他人怎么样
How do you know if he's cool or not?
他看上去挺搞笑的
Well, he seems like he's funny, you know?
他一直在搞艺术
He's always doing interesting art and- -
你刚买♥♥了一堆冷冻食品吗
Did you- - did you just buy all frozen food?
-是啊 -这些都是
- Uh, yeah. - This is all...?
我买♥♥了冷冻意面 冷冻马铃薯
I bought frozen pasta, frozen potatoes,
-冷冻胡萝卜 -都是冷冻食品 伙计
- frozen carrots. - It's all frozen food, man!
你没买♥♥任何真正的食物吗
You didn't buy any real food?
那是真正的水果...食物
That is real fruit... food.
你不能总吃冷冻食品
You can't just eat frozen food all the time.
对身体不好
It's not good for you.
我不明白
I don't get, why...
那玩意儿估计是2016年生产的
That stuff was made in, like, 2016.
冷冻的怎么就对人身体不好了
Why does it being frozen make it bad for you?
都是基因工程那些玩意 不能吃那些
It's all genetically engineered shit. You can't have that.
见鬼
Oh, shit.
见鬼
Oh, shit.
从巴厘岛回来了 在你家附近
一起喝杯咖啡吗
所有人今天都看我不爽
Everybody's fucking mad at me today, man.
天呐 兄弟 这东西有4000卡路里
Holy shit, dude, this is 4000 calories!
现在听上去不错 十点钟老地方见
而我身后有差不多九万个小妖怪跟着我
And there's like 90,000 trolls behind me,
天空是亮紫色的
the sky is bright purple,
我坐在这秋千上摇曳着 然后
and I'm swinging on this thing, and then,
我听到抓挠的声音 回头一看
I hear like these, like, scratching sounds, and I look back.
-我的小妖怪身上都长了蜘蛛 -操
- And all my trolls have got spiders. - Oh, fuck.
从它们的嘴里 鼻子里 耳朵里出来
Just escaping their mouths, and their noses and ears.
-爬出来 不会吧 -然后我们准备开战了
- Crawling out? No! - And we're about to go into battle.
泰国小众饮品 有致幻作用
-真够劲的 -该死的蘑菇奶昔
- That's some shit. - Motherfucking mushroom shake.
-让我先快速消化一下 -很疯狂吧
- Let me just process that real quick... - Right?
评估一下你的精神状态
and, uh, give you a psychoanalysis.
-你彻底嗨了 -对吧
- You're fucked up. - Right?
我坐在那 开始跑
I was sitting there, and as I started running,
我只能听到
all I could hear...
-什么 -你的声音
- What? - ...is your voice.
好像说着 "伊兹
Just being like, "Izzy,
你没法总是逃避这些感觉"
you can't run away from these things all the time."
-我脑子里就一直想着你 -好 不错
- And I just had you on loop in the back of my head. - Good, good.
在巴厘岛 解决事情
Fixing things, from Bali.
-早该这样了 -我想是在拯救我
- About time. - Saving me, I think.
-我会说我拯救了你 -真的吗
- I'm gonna say I saved you. - Really?
-可能没有 -这我能接受
- Not probably. - I'll run with that.
-我救了你 -干杯
- I saved you. - Cheers.
-接下来有什么打算 -这个嘛
- What's next? - Um, well.
我可能会去演一部戏剧
There is a potential play I might do.
-戏剧 -是的 我是新主演
- A play? - Yeah, new lead here.
终于啊 要演戏剧了
A play! Finally!
但有点问题
Well, here's the thing. So.
这个导演
There's this director, and...