生活大麻烦（2017）
Disjointed
第一季
剧集 | 生活大麻烦（2017） | 导航列表
生活大麻烦（2017）
Disjointed S01E18
Part 2
July 23, 2020, 3:25 p.m.
我有次坐飞机去堪萨斯城时经过过
I flew over it once on my way to Kansas City,
但峡谷在左边 我坐在右边
but it was on the left side, I was on the right.
至少你去过堪萨斯城
At least you've been to Kansas City.
不 转飞奥马哈了
No, the plane was diverted to Omaha.
-所以你去过奥马哈 -对 待了两夜
- So, you saw Omaha. - Yeah, two nights.
很棒的城市 机场厕所很干净
Great town. Very clean bathrooms in the airport.
所以你真没去过什么地方
So, you really haven't gone anywhere, have you?
我一直想旅行 但然后我想
I've always meant to travel, but then I thought,
还得买♥♥行李箱什么的
you gotta buy luggage...
等等 你没看过总统山吗
Wait, so you've never seen Mount Rushmore?
没有
Nope.
-老忠实泉 -没有
- Old Faithful? - No.
金门大桥
Golden Gate Bridge?
我在商场见过一次博·布里奇斯
I saw Beau Bridges once at the mall.
不是吧 哪个商场
No shit, which one?
托潘加购物中心 厕所没那么干净
Topanga Promenade. Bathrooms, not so clean.
别担心 沃利
Don't worry, Wally.
-现在你有很多时间去旅行 -是的
- Now you got plenty of time to travel. - Yeah.
全世界的厕所供你赏鉴
The bathrooms of the world are your oyster.
你俩太可爱了
You two are... you're just so cute. I just wanna...
我想把你俩做成早餐三明治
I just wanna make a little breakfast sandwich out of you.
然后 小宝贝
And then, aw, little baby.
然后
Then... And...
我能换座位吗
Can I switch seats?
好的 黛比 你起了个好头
Okay, Dabby, you're off to a good start here.
谢谢
Thank you.
我能提一个建议吗
Can I make one suggestion?
你想干嘛
Can you make a what?
只是碗的阴影有点...
The way the shadow falls on the bowl...
天啊 你说的对
My God, you're right.
我真烂
I'm awful.
天啊 我恨自己
God, I hate myself.
我是无用的垃圾
I am worthless garbage.
不不不 挺好的
No, no, no. It's great.
-真的吗 -真的
- Yeah? - Yeah.
真的
Yeah.
-真要说的话 也是过于好了 -过于好了
- If anything, it's too great. - It's too great?
该死 过于好了 我又搞砸了 丹克
Fuck, it's too great. I fucked up again, Dank.
过来
Come here.
很抱歉你过于好了
I'm sorry you're too great.
看你做了什么 珍妮
See what you did, Jenny?
但我同意你对阴影的建议
Although, I do agree about the shading.
为什么要生下我
Why was I born?!
回答她 圣诞老人
Answer her, Santa Claus!
每日一药
好 说
Okay, go.
说什么
Go what?
说你五分钟前说的话
Just, uh, say the things that you were saying five minutes ago.
-好的 -好
- Okay. - All right.
我觉得更多和我们年龄一样的人
I think that more people our age
应该试试大♥麻♥
should try pot.
对
Right.
原因是
'Cause here's the thing.
抽嗨和变老很像
Being stoned is a lot like being old.
你会健忘
You forget stuff.
对 而且你开车很慢
Yeah, and you drive too slow.
你会睡着 经常睡着
And you fall asleep. You fall asleep all the time.
对 而且你会健忘
Yeah... and you forget stuff.
但是说你老了不酷
But it's not cool to say you're old.
说你嗨了才酷
It is cool to say you're high.
嗨
High.
我为什么打不开电邮
Why can't I open my e-mails?
因为我太老了 不懂怎么操作电脑吗
Is it 'cause I can't...? I'm old too old to work my computer?
不 因为我抽嗨了
No, it's 'cause I'm baked.
我又在超♥市♥迷路了 真心累
I got lost in the supermarket again. What a burnout.
是啊
Yeah.
你知道我们需要什么吗
You know what we need?
我们要给抽大♥麻♥的老人组建个社团
We need a group for old people who smoke pot.
对 就像美国退休者协会
Right, like AARP.
但这个叫美国退休者抽大♥麻♥协会
Except this would be AARPot.
美国退休者抽大♥麻♥协会
The American Association for Retired... Pot.
多棒啊
How great is that?
对 我要让特拉维斯
Yeah. I'm gonna have Travis
做个标志贴在后面
make a logo and stick it on the end of this.
什么后面
The end of what?
天啊 安吉洛 饶了我吧
God, Angelo, give it a rest.
奶奶 整个粪球的事都是
Nana, this whole Shitball thing started
因你的卷卷软糖而起
because of your Fudge Swirls.
真希望你能告诉我该怎么做
Wish you could tell me what to do.
奶奶
Nana?
没错 孩子
That's right, my child.
奶奶
Nana...
我不知道该怎么做
I don't know what to do.
我该和特拉维斯一起 还是该收钱
Should I stick with Travis or take the money?
奥莉维亚 钱如流水
Olivia, money comes and goes,
但真正的友谊才会在你心里扎根
but true friendship lives in your heart forever.
审视内心...
Look inside...
你♥他♥妈♥在我拖车里做什么
The hell you doing in my trailer?
天啊
Dear.
你是谁
Who are you?
我是你的真奶奶
I'm your real Nana,
不是你幻想的狗屁奶奶
not some bullshit fantasy from your imagination.
但我记忆中的奶奶是那样的
But the other Nana's how I remember you.
不 那是戴假发的你
No, that's you in a wig,
在重复《木偶宝贝》上的屁话
repeating crap you heard on Muppet Babies.
-我喜欢那剧 -我知道
- I loved that show. - I know.
以前我想在隔壁第三辆拖车里
I used to plant you in front of it
干厄尔·海耶斯时
when I wanted to bang Earl Hayes
就会把你放在电视前
two trailers over.
厄尔叔叔
Uncle Earl?
他不是你叔叔 他只是个
He wasn't your uncle. He was a meth dealer
喜欢我裸体的毒贩
who liked how I looked with my pants off.
奶奶 别说了
Nana, stop.
得了吧 你要我的建议 你会听到的
Screw that. You wanted my advice, you'll get it.
别当蠢货 收下钱
Don't be a dumb-ass, take the money.
-但是特拉维斯 -去特拉维斯的
- But Travis... - Fuck Travis.
你得到了收钱改变生活的机会 抓住它
You get a chance to cash in and change your life, you take it.
这个该死的家族能有一个人有出息
Be nice to have one person in this damn family
就不错了
make something of themselves.
或者别收钱 沦落成我这样
Or don't, and end up like me.
贫穷 孤独
Poor, alone,
连自己的"孙女"都记错了我
and misremembered by my own "Granddaughter."
为什么要打引号♥
What were those air quotes for?
没什么 你走吧
Nothing, run along now.
你是妈妈的姐姐吗
Are you Mom's older sister?
-我总是怀疑 -奥莉维亚
- I always suspected... - Olivia.
你别做磕嗨的白日梦 快滚
You quit your stoned daydreaming and git.
-但是 -我说了 快滚
- But... - I said, git.
厄尔叔叔是毒贩
Uncle Earl was a meth dealer.
所以他才有那么多冰♥毒♥
That's why he had all that meth.
那是我喝的水 但是没事
I was drinking that, but fine.
我都涮了一小时笔了 好奇你什么时候注意到
I've been doing it for the last hour. I wondered when you'd notice.
他们很有爱吧
Cute, aren't they?
是的
Yeah, they are.
你觉得他们做了吗
You think they doing it?
别这样 这可不酷
Come on, man, that's not cool.
为什么 做♥爱♥很美好
Why not? Making love is beautiful.
沃尔特现在正尝试他从来没做过的事
And Walter's new deal is he's trying things he's never done.
跟你妈妈一起
With your mom.
别说了
Stop.
-做♥爱♥ -别说了
生活大麻烦（2017）
Disjointed
剧集 | 生活大麻烦（2017） | 导航列表