生活大麻烦（2017）

Disjointed S01E15

Part 2 July 23, 2020, 3:24 p.m.

只有你和孤寂的大自然
Just you and the solitude of nature.
介意我跟你一起去吗
You mind if I tag along?
我猜有个伴也不错
Oh, uh, I guess I wouldn't mind some company.
不我可不只是伴
Oh, no, I'm not just company.
我是个经验丰富的野外生存者
I'm a skilled outdoorsman.
能轻松在树林里存活两周
I can survive out in the woods two weeks, easy.
关键就在于准备
The key is preparation.
比如我喜欢带上能吃两周的食物
For instance, I like to pack two weeks' worth of food.
食物我应该带够了所以...
Well, I think I've got enough food, so...
你带了高能量点心吗
You packing your gorp?
传统的葡萄干和花生
You know, good old raisins and peanuts.
我喜欢自己做我会多加南瓜子进去
I like to mix my own blend. I add extra pepitas.
就是小小的南瓜种子
Those are little baby pumpkin seeds.
知道吗我的露营包就在店里
You know what? I got my camping go-bag inside.
你把车打着火
You fire it up, you blast the air.
我去拿张能震翻你的游艇摇滚混音碟
I got a mix tape that's gonna Yacht Rock your world.
好你不想知道我们要去哪去多久吗
Okay, do you wanna know where we're going or how long?
不想别剧透
Nope! No spoilers!
脚踝怎么样了
How's the ankle?
很好
It's good.
大♥麻♥二酚精油止住了局部疼痛
The CBD oil is treating it topically.
车祸现场也在从体内让我的肺...
And this TrainWreck is treating my lungs...
变得像肺
inside, being lungsily.
妈妈那种大♥麻♥挺猛的
Mom, that's a strong strain.
"妈咪小心那种大♥麻♥挺猛的"
"Oh, Mommy, be careful, that weed is really, really strong."
显然还让你更混♥蛋♥了
Obviously, it's making you more of an asshole.
但那些治不好骨折的
All right, Mom, but it's not gonna cure a broken bone.
你得去看医生
You need to go to a doctor.
特拉维斯你就学不聪明吗
Travis, will you never learn?
西医就是骗钱的
Western health care is a racket.
你生了病去看医生
You get sick, you go to the doctor,
他们告诉你是哪里有问题给你开药
they tell you what's wrong, they give you medicine,
还没等你反应过来你的病就好了
and before you know it, you're all healed
准备继续生下一次
and ready for the next illness.
这种疯狂什么时候会结束
When will the madness end?
现在吗
Now?
我不知道我们该让他进店吗茉茉
I don't know. Should we let him in, Jasmine?
你确定吗
Hm? You sure?
我说不好我看你挺可疑的
I don't know. You look kind of shady to me.
但茉茉说你没事
But Jasmine says you're cool.
干得好爱斯基摩吻
Nice work. Eskimo kisses.
有人在撒狗粮哦
Cute couple alert.
真可爱能看到他进行交流真棒
Adorable. It's nice to see him connecting.
你爪子挠得我好痒
Your claws tickle.
-他们俩真亲 -是啊
- Aw, they're so affectionate. - Yeah.
他在宜家里牵我的手都觉得怪
He gets weird about holding my hand at IKEA,
嘴对嘴喂鸟倒是没问题
but sure, mouth-feed a bird.
-你不会在吃一只鹦鹉的醋吧 -不会
- You're not jealous of a parrot, are you? - No.
婊♥子♥才叫茉茉对吗
Jasmine is kind of a slut name, isn't it?
你真的在吃醋
You are jealous.
太好笑了
That's hilarious.
吓到你了吧
Boo! Gotcha.
我穿着这身迷彩道服相当隐蔽的
Yeah, I'm hard to spot in my camo gi.
你走了好久
You were gone a long time.
是我弄丢了只露营洞洞鞋
Oh, yeah, I lost one of my camping Crocs,
好不容易才从水獭手里抢回来
and it took a while to get it back from the beaver.
-没事道格拉斯 -准备好吧
- No problem, Douglas. - Get ready.
我要教你怎么只用两根木棍生火
I'll teach you how to build a fire using nothing but two sticks,
-还有火柴和火机油 -是吗
- a match and some lighter fluid. - Yeah?
听起来不错
Sounds good.
那是你找到的吗
Did you find that?
不是我搭的
No, I made it.
当心那根绊线
Be careful of the trip wire.
-那是干什么的 -安全
- What is that for? - Security.
那是我们围居区阻拦外来者的老办法
It's an old trick from the compound to keep the outsiders away.
来我演示给你看看
Here, let me show you.
那你以前露营过了
So, you've been camping before.
我觉得这里离我上次扎营的地方挺近
I think we're close to where I was the last time I was here.
等我们一安顿好
As soon as we're set up,
我就开始找我要找的东西
I wanna start trying to find what I'm looking for.
我陪你
I'm right there with you.
派派思
道格拉斯你洞洞鞋上爬得全是火蚁
Douglas, there're fire ants are crawling over your camping Crocs.
想得美我这种老手可不会被你骗
Nice try. I'm a little too experienced to fall for that one.
不过挺疼啊
Ow, though.
-真的 -是等等
- Ow! Yeah. Ow! - Yeah. Yeah, wait there.
每日一药
观察得挺深刻
Well observed.
你好我没看到你在那
Oh, hi. I didn't see you there.
我是特拉维斯·费尔德曼
I'm Travis Feldman,
露丝另类治疗店的小老板
the maverick co-owner of Ruth's Alternative Caring.
我是个爱好丰富的人
I'm a man of many passions.
艺术文学
Art. Literature.
有真正剧情的毛♥片♥
Pornography that tells a story.
但我最热爱的是精品大♥麻♥
But my greatest passion is fine cannabis,
我很荣幸地向你们介绍
which is why I'm pleased to introduce
特拉维西莫私人珍藏
Travissimo Private Reserve.
特拉维西莫
Travissimo.
我将私人最爱的各种杂交大♥麻♥经过亲手调配
Travissimo PR is a personally curated mix of my favorite indicas,
制成特拉维西莫私藏
sativas and hybrids.
特拉维西莫
Travissimo.
每一只定制化的包装罐都以手工编号♥
Each custom-packed canister has been hand-numbered
保证最大连续性
to ensure maximum sequentiality.
不信吗
Don't believe me?
八号♥
Eight.
八号♥
Eight.
但味道如何呢
But how does it smoke?
拜托
Come on.
和我本人一样顺口
As smooth as the man I named it after.
特拉维西莫私人珍藏
Travissimo Private Reserve.
就像让我进入你的身体
It's like having a little bit of me inside you.
干嘛
Guys?
-特拉维西莫 -对了
- Travissimo. - Mm. Yes.
你真是个好倾听者茉茉
You are a really good listener, Jasmine.
我从没给别人说过
I've never actually told anybody this...
但从我少年时起
but ever since I was a teenager, I've...
我一直爱...
I've always loved...
-我其实一直想试试... -嗨
- I've always wanted to try to... - Hey.
嗨
Hey. Hey.
我打扰你们了吗
Am I interrupting?
打扰吗没有我在和茉茉讲话
Interrupting? No. I was talking to Jasmine,
你来了我就停下了
then I stopped because you came in.
这算打扰吗在俺们那旮不算
Is that interrupting? Not where I come from.
好吧
Okay.
我该回去了
Well, I should probably head back.
我该回去还是留下
Should I head back, or should I stay, or...?
不不不是的
No, no. No, yeah, yeah.
是的你该留下
You... Yeah. You should stay.
如果你想的话
If you want to.
-好我留下 -好
- Okay, cool. I'll stay. - All right.
-我还是走吧 -好
- I'll go. Yeah. - Okay. All right.
你从医学院退学是对的
You did the right thing getting the hell out of medical school,
或者像我叫的庸医学院
or as I call it, Quack U.
露丝我没上医学院那是珍妮
Ruth, I didn't go to med school. That was Jenny.
求同存异
Agree to disagree.
我用大♥麻♥二酚精油和大♥麻♥治好了我的脚踝
See, I treated my ankle with CBD oil and a shit-ton of weed,
我现在走路一点毛病没有
and I'm walking just fine.
你根本没在走路
You're not walking at all.
那是因为废物才走路珍妮
That's 'cause walking is for suckers, Jenny.
等等那是珍妮
Oh. Oh, wait. That's Jenny.
你♥他♥妈♥是谁
Who the fuck are you?