生活大麻烦（2017）

Disjointed S01E03

Part 2 July 23, 2020, 3:22 p.m.

特拉维斯
Travis.
特拉维斯啊
Travesty.
"国民大雕男" 特拉维斯
National Traves-Deez Nuts.
丹克黛比谢谢你俩这么支持我们
Dank, Dabby. Thank you guys so much for all your support.
更别提你俩拉来的生意了
Not to mention all the business you guys brought this morning.
但你确实提了啊
But you did mention it.
两位这样吧
Well, guys, you know what?
作为这里的老板
As the boss around here,
我想跟你俩谈一个有前景的商机
I'd like to talk to you about a very exciting business opportunity.
请到我办公室来
Please, step into my office.
你办公室没有墙啊
Your office has no walls, man.
但确实有地板就像是脚下的墙
But it does have a floor and that's like a wall for your feet.
你说啥呢
What?
-什么鬼 -我也不知道
- What? - I don't know.
我在墙上
I'm on the wall.
-这货是谁啊 -瞧见没两位
- Who is this? - You see, guys?
这就是我说的
That's what I'm talking about.
你们身上有斯蒂芬·金所谓的"才华"
You guys have what Stephen King once called IT.
我刚看了一下
Last I checked,
你们差不多有十万个粉丝了对吗
you guys are pretty close to 100,000 subscribers, right?
十万零一千三百六十四个
A hundred and one thousand three hundred sixty-four.
左右
Ish.
像你们这样的大♥麻♥表演者
For marijuana performers like yourselves
想要在这个快节奏大♥麻♥娱乐的地区生存
to survive in the fast-paced, ganja-tainment sector,
你们需要公♥司♥赞助
you're gonna need corporate sponsorship.
我不知道你们有没有收到过任何出价
I don't know if you've had any offers.
我也不知道
I don't know either.
好吧
Okay.
你们看这样行不
Here's the deal.
我想加入丹克和黛比
I wanna get into the Dank and Dabby business.
这真是
Well, that's...
很荣幸
very flattering,
但是
but...
我们现在算是在搞一夫一妻制
we're kind of just doing the monogamy thing right now.
不我不是那个意思
No. I'm not--
-你可以情人节之后再问 -到时候再说
- You can check back in after Valentine's Day, - Yes, after that.
-我们肯定能加你进来 -可以带上你
- I'm sure we can squeeze you right in. - We can squeeze you in.
我真的不是那个意思
That really wasn't what I meant.
我们有个安全词赛百味
We have a safe word. It's "Subway."
我是想要
I-- What I want...
露丝另类治疗店
is for Ruth's Alternative Caring
成为你们油管频道的官方赞助商
to be the official sponsor of your YouTube channel.
我能想象你们问自己
I can see you asking yourselves,
赞助是什么意思
"What does sponsorship mean?"
我靠
Holy shit.
这狗♥日♥的♥能看到我们脑子里的问题
Yeah, this motherfucker sees questions.
简单来说
So, simply put...
你们帮我们宣传药房♥
in exchange for promoting our dispensary,
作为交换我们提供你们所有的大♥麻♥
we will supply you with all your product.
-但我们的大♥麻♥本来就是你家买♥♥的 -对
- But you already do. - Yeah.
免费提供
For free.
你们觉得呢行还是不行
So, what do you say? Yes or no?
我还有一个问题
Well, I got one question for you.
你能看出来吗混♥蛋♥
Can you see it, motherfucker?
请进
Come in.
玛丽亚进入了大♥麻♥传奇人物
And so Maria entered the inner sanctum
露丝·怀特菲泽·费尔德曼的内室
of cannabis legend Ruth Whitefeather Feldman.
玛丽亚你在做旁白说明
Maria, you're narrating.
是吗
I'm doing that?
是的对于新手来说很正常
Yeah. And it's very common with new users.
我会意地点点头
I nod knowingly.
我的天那是你和吉米·卡特的合影吗
Oh, my God, is that a picture of you and Jimmy Carter?
是的年轻帅气的吉米·厄尔
Yeah, good old Jimmy Earl.
那个人最爱三样东西大♥麻♥ 花生和失败
You know, that guy loved three things: Weed, peanuts and failure.
这让我想起了你玛丽亚
Which brings me to you, Maria.
就在几天前
You know, just a few days ago...
你走进我的店连咬一口大♥麻♥布朗尼都不敢
you entered my store afraid to take a bite of pot brownie.
我解释过我的减肥奖励用完了
I explained to you that I was out of Weight Watchers points.
对还有昨晚
Yes. And then last night,
你一个人来参加大♥麻♥集♥会♥
you showed up alone at a cannabis rally,
带着这顶帽子跨坐在哈雷上
straddling a Harley wearing that hat.
很帅吧看着
I know, right? Check it out.
#飞行员
Number sign, "Stoner"!
亲爱的你有中年危机了
Sweetheart, you're having a midlife crisis.
作为你的药贩子和萨满法师
And as your pot dealer and shaman--
你是萨满法师
You're a shaman?
是的还是拉比
Yes. And a rabbi.
拉比犹太教老师
我强烈建议你缓慢地进入状态
I strongly advise you to just ease into this.
没必要彻底改变你的生活
There's no need to radically change your life.
但我的生活太无聊了
But my life is boring.
就在昨天我正在推我五岁的儿子荡秋千
Just yesterday, I was pushing my 5-year-old on the swing,
我心里想康纳在荡秋千
and I thought to myself, "Sure, Connor's swinging,
康纳一会上升一会下降而我哪也不能去
Connor's going up and down, but I'm not going anywhere.
我只能在这推他像个傻♥逼♥
I'm just pushing him, like a sucker."
-露丝卡特有些不对劲 -不好意思
-Ruth, something's wrong with Carter. -Excuse me.
他像那样一动不动十分钟了
He's been frozen like that for ten minutes.
卡特你还好吗
Carter, are you okay?
卡特
Carter.
怎么了
Yeah.
我只是
I just--
我需要
I need to, uh, uh...
我得走了
I gotta go...
对
Yeah.
他正走向你的办公室
He's going towards your office.
他正走进去关上门
He's entering the room, closing the door.
他在锁你办公室的门
He's locking the door to your off--
玛丽亚你又在做旁白了
Maria, you're narrating.
不好意思
I'm sorry.
我用懊悔的声音说道
I said, my voice tinged with regret.
你觉得这是创伤后应激障碍吗
Do you think it's a PTSD thing?
可能吧我不是个医生
Probably. I'm not a doctor.
我也不是你为什么要怪我呢
Well, neither am I. Why would you even accuse me of that?
卡特我是露丝你还好吗
Carter, it's Ruth. How you doing?
对不起露丝
Sorry, Ruth.
我只是需要些时间独处
I just... need some time alone.
没问题只要你愿意你可以整天呆在那
You got it. You can stay in there all day if you want.
如果你想听音乐
If you like music...
桌子后面的黑胶唱片有琼妮·米切尔的全集
I got the complete Joni Mitchell on vinyl behind the desk.
从《蓝》开始然后是之前的
Start with "Blue" and then go backwards.
谢谢你
Thank you.
我还知道你不和人分享食物
Also, I know you don't partake...
但你可以看看我的一些藏书
but you might check out some of the books I have
关于大♥麻♥的所有好处
on all the good things pot can do
减轻焦虑压力抑郁
for anxiety, stress, depression.
人们叫它"万忧解"而不是"万忧结"是有原因的
You know, there's a reason they call it "Cannabis," Not "Can't-abis."
你在里面能听懂吗
Did you get that in there?
我在这听懂了
Yeah, I-- I got it in here.
最重要的是
And most importantly,
如果你想要聊天我的门永远为你敞开
if you ever wanna talk, my door's always open.
现在不行
Well, not-- Not now.
你把它锁上了
You've got it locked.
但我们还是在聊天所以这门不成问题
And we're still talking, so... the door is a nonissue.
每日一药
你好我是特拉维斯
Hello there. I'm Travis.
我是奥莉维亚他的员工
And I'm Olivia, his employee.
欢迎收看每日一药
Welcome to Strain O' the Day.
大家都知道大♥麻♥中的烟雾家族
You know the Haze family of pot.
紫色烟雾柬埔寨烟雾和柠檬烟雾
Purple Haze, Cambodian Haze and Lemon Haze.
今天我们要介绍
Today we're offering
这些品种里一个鲜为人知的表亲
one of those strains' lesser-known cousins.