呆逼还愿人（2014）

Deadbeat S03E09

Part 1 April 16, 2021, 8:33 p.m.

Because when it comes to finishing ghosts'
说到帮助鬼魂完成未了心愿
unfinished business, our business is "Boo-ming."
我们要做的是 "拓宽市场"
Ahem, and with the help of your investment,
多亏了您的投资
we can take this thing all the way to the top.
我们现在可以一跃成为行业龙头
But how? B-but how?
但是怎么做呢?
Very good question.
问得好
We're going to invest your money
我们会把您的投资
using a very robust three-point business plan.
运用于三条商业规划上面
Point number one,
第一条
matching uniforms. Obviously.
统一制♥服♥ 当然
Number two,
第二条
spend money to make money! Spend money to make money!
散尽钱财还复来散尽钱财还复来
And number three...
第三条...
Marketing. We all know
市场营销我们都知道
that skywriter planes are the most
飞行汽艇广♥告♥
effective marketing tool in the sky today.
是现今最有效率的空中营销方式
You put something in the air,
你在天上放一点东西
I'm gonna see it. But, dang it, Clyde,
我肯定会看到但是等等克莱德
planes are so expensive!
飞机太贵了
Ah, if only there were a way
如果有一种
to make airborne messaging more affordable.
能让空中营销变得便宜的方法就好了
What if I told you there was?
如果我告诉你真的有呢?
"Pigeonvertising"!
"鸽子营销"!
Birds in T-shirts.
让鸽子穿上T恤
Guys, you want my honest opinion?
伙计们你们想听真话么
Yes, please.
是的
You're beating off the wrong tree, all right?
你们用劲的方向完全错了知道么
I mean, even if I saw the bird wearing the shirt,
就算我看见天上有穿T恤的鸽子
I don't think I'd care 'cause it's...
我也不会在乎因为...
it's fucking stupid, you know?
这太蠢了明白不?
Uh-huh. Yeah. No, I had that thought.
明白明白我也这么觉得
No, you said you liked the T-shirts.
不你说你可喜欢这些T恤了
Well, no. I said that I liked tank tops.
不不不我说的是我喜欢当行业老大
It doesn't have shoulders. It's a fucking bird.
它连肩膀都没有这就是只大笨鸟
Clyde, how many times do we have to go over this?
克莱德咱们能不能别说这些了?
Are you kidding me?
你在逗我呢?
Where are the fucking shoulders?
他妈的肩膀在哪呢?
Guys, guys.
兄弟大兄弟们啊
I'm sorry.
我很抱歉
I'm out.
我不陪你们玩了
But...
但是...
I will give you my best business advice.
我会告诉你们一条最棒的商业建议
Go bigger. That's good. Do you have a pen?
要更大好建议你有笔么?
That's the motto for my new dildo line.
我的假阳♥具♥生产线的格言就是这个
It's the way I live my life.
这也是我的生活方式
All right. I've had over 97 casts taken of my dick
这么说吧在过去的三天里
in the past three days, and I'll be honest with you,
我用我的老二筑了超过97个阳♥具♥ 我说真的
the first one was pretty damn near perfect, but I said go bigger.
第一个简直近乎完美但是我说要更大
You wanna play the game at my level?
你们想达到我这种高度么?
You gotta get your dicks out and show the world
你要拿出勇气向世界证明
how you fuck.
你最屌♥
And by that, I mean get a high-profile case
意思是你要接一个大案子
that makes headlines.
震撼世人扬名立万
Oh. Yeah. Shit. Yeah. Okay, yep. No, good call.
哦哦哦对你说的很对
That's another way to go.
这么理解也可以
Mr. Pacalioglu, welcome to San Damien Prison.
派克里欧格鲁先生欢迎来到圣达米安监狱
You didn't have any trouble getting here, did you?
来这的路上没遇上什么事吧?
No, no, no, no. No, the, uh...
没有没有没有
the guards made quite the spectacle
我刚到大门的时候
of my arrival at the front gate,
狱警们真的是让我震惊
but my pants are back on now
但是我现在已经冷静下来了
and I'm, uh... I'm feeling good.
我... 我挺好的
Listen, as I mentioned in my email,
听着就像我在邮件里说到的那样
I don't have a lot of money in the budget.
我没有太多的预算
But I'm hoping this case
但是我希望这次案件
could be some decent exposure for you.
能够给你带来一定的曝光率
I don't wanna say we're "The" Celebrity prison but...
我不会说我们是有名的 "名人监狱"
any rapist or murderer whose name you would know
但是你知道的任何臭名昭著的强♥奸♥犯或杀人犯
has come through here at some point.
都能在我们监狱里找到
That is exactly the kind of case I'm looking for.
这就是我梦寐以求的案件
So, uh, do you mind telling me what's going on?
那么你能告诉我到底发生什么事了么?
Cell doors opening on their own.
监狱门自己就打开了
Floating markers drawing penises on my guards' faces.
悬浮的马克笔在我狱警脸上画老二
Got it. Okay.
好的我明白了
Very interesting.
非常有趣
Okay, do you mind showing me
你能带我去看看
where the haunting has occurred?
鬼混出没的地方么
Mm-hmm. I see.
好的我明白了
I'm not sure if it's meant to be threatening or sensual.
我不知道这算是恐吓还是示爱
Hush, hush, hush, hush.
嘘嘘嘘嘘
Okay, now we can clean it off.
好了现在你可以擦掉了
Excuse me. Hi.
打扰一下你好
What is a beautiful woman like you doing in a place like this?
像你这么漂亮的妹纸在这种地方干什么
Uh, you can see me? Yeah.
你能看见我? 对呀
I can. What... what do you got there?
我可以你... 你那边画了个啥
You got a hummingbird on your boo... your breast?
你咪... 你胸上有个蜂鸟?
I'm dead, dude, and hard-core lesbian.
我都死了哥们而且我是个纯的蕾丝边
Oh! No, no, no. I'm not... I'm not hitting on you.
不不不不我不是在跟你调情
I'm not even sure how to do that, really.
其实我都不知道怎么调情
I just... just admiring your hummingbird tattoo, honestly.
我只是... 我真的很欣赏你的蜂鸟纹身
Um, I have 67 tattoos on my body.
我身上有67个纹身
You like the one generic one on my tit?
你就喜欢我胸上的那一个?
Okay, I feel like maybe we got off on the wrong tit here,
好的吧情况有点出乎我的意料
so I'm just gonna... I'm gonna take it back.
咱们咱们重新开始吧
I'm trying to figure out what you're doing here,
我想搞清楚你在这干嘛
if you have any unfinished business
你是不是有什么未了的心愿
that I can help you with of any kind.
什么都行我能帮你呀
I was in the middle of inking someone when I died.
我死的时候正帮某个人画纹身呢
I can't leave that canvas unfinished.
我不能没画完就走了啊
Okay, tattoo. Easy-peasy.
好的纹身小菜一碟
Got it. Let's go. It's a very special tattoo.
明白了走起这是个很特别的纹身
A windmill.
是个风车
Owen, my canvas,
我纹身的那个人叫欧文
he grew up by a windmill on the shores of Cape Cod.
他在科德角海岸的一个风车旁长大
He played by it every day with his brother.
他和他兄弟每天都在风车旁边玩
He wanted that tattoo to commemorate
他想用这个纹身来纪念
the happiest time of his life before things got tough.
在厄运来临之前在他入狱之前
Before he ended up here.
他生命中最美好的时光
Cool.
很好
Windmill. Got it. Let's go.
风车我知道了走吧
I guess I saw a piece of myself in that tattoo.
我觉得我从这个纹身中看到了一点自己的影子
Sure, I've said that about a lot of tattoos, but this one was...
我知道我对许多纹身都这么说过但是这一个...
different. Still talking?
很特别你还说着呢
Innocent. Fine.
很无辜随你吧
Pure like... Come on.
纯洁得就像... 快走
Mozart or Shakespeare
莫扎特莎士比亚
or Patti Smith.
或者是帕蒂·史密斯
Are you still talking?!
你还在说嘛?
Well, she's a bit of a motormouth, inked-up dink,
她是有点话唠还是个不折不扣的丁克
but, uh, the job seems pretty straightforward, fortunately.
但幸运的是这份工作看起来还挺容易的
All I have to do is get this Owen guy out,
我只要把这个叫欧文的伙计弄出来
finish his tattoo, she'll go into her light,
把纹身弄完然后她就可以升♥天♥啦
and Bob's your uncle, we're back in business.
易如反掌就搞定啦
Oh, perfect. Yeah.
完美没错
One small problem. Okay.
但是有一个小问题你说
We can't just take an inmate out,
我们不能把囚犯放出来
give them a tattoo, and then stick them back in
给他们画个纹身再把他们塞回来
because he's gonna look like a rat.
因为这样他会看起来像个内奸
Oh, okay. Well, you know,
好的吧好的吧但是
the tricky thing about ghosts
难办的是