歪星撞地球（1996）

3rd rock from the sun S06E10

Part 1 Sept. 8, 2021, 3:06 p.m.

《歪星撞地球》
第六季第十集
今天真适合在公园散步啊
Ah, what a beautiful day for a walk in the park.
欧布莱特想来点冰淇淋吗
Hey, Albright, would you like some ice cream?
是的哈里我想来点
Well, yes, Harry, I suppose I would.
那你只好自己去买♥♥了
Well, you'll have to buy it, then,
我的钱在这里不好用
'cause my money's no good here.
你的钱在哪里都不好用
Your money's not good anywhere.
只不过是我的钞票的复印件而已
It's nothing but photocopies of my money.
来吧哈里
Come on, Harry.
迪克看派对快来看看
Dick! Look, a party. Let's check it out!
莎莉一个成年人怎么会对儿童派对
Sally, why would a grown man take the slightest interest
提得起兴趣
in a child's b--
还有气球呢
They have balloons!
哈里你要哪个
So, Harry, what do you want?
真是让人眼花缭乱的选择
Well, it's quite a dazzling selection,
可我非常想要三色棒冰
but I think I've got a hankering for a bomb pop.
不过我的龈线退化了
But I've got a receding gum line,
蓝色部分吃了会酸痛
and the blue part tends to sting.
曲奇味趣不错
Cookiewiches are good.
这样搭配就有双倍口感了
You see, with them, you get the double-whammy.
又有冰淇淋又有曲奇
You get ice cream and a cookie.
两种太多一种又不过瘾真是...
But it's too much of both, not enough of either. It's...
就要个抽抽冰
Just get the Push-Up.
那吃起来太费劲了
Ooh, that's-- that's a lot of work.
我想要玫瑰
Ooh, I want the rose!
太迟了我已经想好要它了
Too late. I called it in my head.
下一个魔术我会请一个帮手
For my next trick, I will need a helper.
来个老爸怎么样
How about one of the daddies?
就你吧先生
You, sir.
我
Me?
能上台来帮我吗
Will you help me out on stage?
你干什么我们不是来交朋友的
Hey, what are you doing? We're not here to mingle.
我是帮手老爸了
I'm the helper daddy.
上台吧先生
Step right up, sir.
我该先吃哪个呢
Now, which one should I eat first?
给拿好我得付钱
Here, hold this. I have to pay.
那个看上去不错
Oh. That looks good.
救命救命
Hey! Hey! Help! Help!
你叫什么名字先生
And what is your name, sir?
迪克·所罗门
Dick Solomon.
你耳后洗过了吗
And you wash behind your ears?
洗了
Yeah.
那你怎么解释这个
Then how would you explain this?
能读一下字条吗
Can you read that note?
"生日快乐艾玛"
"Happy Birthday, Emma."
为迪克热烈鼓掌
A big hand for Dick.
伙计你太厉害了
Oh, man, you were awesome!
谢谢
Oh, thank you!
迪克有人抢了我的包
Dick! Somebody stole my purse!
就在刚才吗你没看到我刚才在台上
Just now? You mean you didn't see me up there?
"多谢"捧场
Thanks a lot!
玛丽这是根据所有目击证人的描述
Mary, this a composite sketch of your assailant,
合成的劫犯素描图
based on all the eyewitness accounts.
他的头怎么这么大
Why is his head so big?
他为什么拿着个网球拍
Why is he holding a tennis racquet?
局里请不起全职的素描画家
Well, the department can't afford a full-time sketch artist,
所以我们从生日聚会上
so we had the caricature guy
找了个画漫画的
from the birthday party do it.
他还把唐画成了帅气牛仔
He also did a great one of Don as a cowboy.
对
Yeah.
知道那个暴徒
Oh, I feel so vulnerable
还在逍遥法外我觉得好无助
knowing that hoodlum is out there somewhere.
我可怜的受伤的玛丽
Oh, my poor traumatized Mary.
那我呢
Well, what about me?
这事只是在你身上发生了
I mean, you only had it happen to you.
而我不得不眼睁睁看着这事在你身上发生
I had to stand there and watch it happen to you.
我的余生都将生活在这阴影里
I got to live with that for the rest of my life.
瞧你做的好事欧布莱特
Way to go, Albright.
玛丽如果你感兴趣
Mary, if you're interested,
我在青年会教防身术
I teach a self-defense course down at the Y.
谢了唐
Thanks, Don.
我可能会去上课的
I just might take you up on that.
我该填张笔录吗
Should I fill out a report?
有什么意义呢
Ah, what's the point?
我是说当然要填了
I mean, oh, uh, sure, yeah.
谢谢你唐
Thank you, Don.
好好照顾她好吗
Take good care of her, will you?
莎莉今天真是太棒了
Oh, Sally, today was just amazing!
我知道
I know!
我登上台
When I went up onto that stage
面对着人海的时候
in front of that sea of faces,
整个人热血沸腾
it was just exhilarating.
他们都是陌生人
They were all strangers,
而我却感到一股爱的热浪向我冲来
and yet I felt this wave of love washing over me.
你看上去像是在流汗
You kind of looked like you were sweating.
我还想体会一次那种感觉我会的
I want to feel that feeling again, and I will.
你要怎么做
What are you gonna do,
去镇上转悠主动给魔术师们打下手
go around town volunteering to help magicians?
不我要自己变魔术
No. I will make my own magic.
你不懂魔术
You don't know how.
莎莉每个魔术手法都有理性的解释
Sally, every illusion has a rational explanation.
当一个魔术师从帽子里拽出鸽子
When a magician pulls a dove out of a hat,
这帽子里准有秘密口袋
the hat has a secret pocket.
漂浮的球
The floating ball?
是连在两根看不见的线上
Attached to two invisible strings.
中国神秘盒
The Chinese mystery box?
就是神秘盒
Mystery box.
中国制♥造♥
Made in China.
老天这些你都是怎么知道的
My God! How do you know all this?
我是个物理学家
I'm a physicist.
我观察宇宙中的各种神秘现象
I observe the mysterious phenomena of the universe
然后进行解释
and I explain them.
外加我们在等警♥察♥过来的时候
Plus, when we were waiting for the cops to come,
我在那家伙旅行车的后面翻了个遍
I went through the back of that guy's station wagon.
厉害
Good one.
可你知道迪克
But you know, Dick,
每个伟大的魔术师都需要个迷人的助手
every great magician needs a glamorous assistant.
我一直觉得你天生丽质
You know, I've always thought you had a natural presence.
真的吗我的天
Really? Oh, my God.
说来好笑
It's so funny you say that,
如果我不是拿到了
'cause if I hadn't gotten my degree
星际探测的文凭
in interstellar exploration,
我一定会在艺术领域有所造诣
I definitely would have done something in the arts.
你愿意和我一起步入神秘的艺术领域吗
Would you like to join me in the mystical arts?
西格弗雷德先生
Mr. Siegfreid.
[著名魔术师组合西格弗雷德&罗伊]
罗伊
Roy.
我真高兴来上这堂课
I'm really excited about this class.
我觉得学习防身术迟早有用
I think learning self-defense will come in handy.
的确玛丽
Indeed, Mary.
我厌倦了去酒吧
I am so tired of going to the bars
总是被拉瑟福的所有直男占便宜
and being groped by every straight man in Rutherford.
好了各位新来的学员
All right, for all the new people...
谢谢
Thank you.
我是唐·奥维尔警官
I'm Officer Don Orville.
这二十年来我一直在某个
Over the past 20 years, I've studied self-defense
高级政♥府♥机构学习防身术
at some of the top government agencies,
研究出简单而有效的搏斗技巧
developing simple yet effective combat techniques.
-提问 -说
- Excuse me. - Yes.
你那件汗衫上印的小字
Does the small print on your shirt
是"联邦比基尼调查员"吗