歪星撞地球（1996）

3rd rock from the sun S06E04

Part 3 Sept. 8, 2021, 3:05 p.m.

是
Yes.
那你们这些人
Then what the hell
都在我办公室干什么
are you people doing in my office?
哈里我们急需有创意的节目编排
Harry, we need some creative counterprogramming fast.
ABC电视台已经凭借
ABC's got a major hit
《谁想做一个土耳其囚犯》收视大增
with Who Wants to Be a Turkish Prisoner?
这可能适用于ABC
Well, that might be good for ABC,
可我们得坚守原则
but that's not who we are.
我们注重的是质量好吗
We're about quality, all right?
我想要我们的电视网♥关♥注家庭
I want this network to be about families
暴♥力♥
and violence
能钻广监局空子的前提下越黄越好
and as much sex as we can get away with.
好了开始工作吧
All right, let's get busy.
我看了那么久的电视
I didn't waste all those hours
也算是有用武之地了
watching TV for nothing.
不介意我移♥动♥几个吧
You mind if I move a few of these around?
你要变更节目表吗
You're gonna change the schedule?
不不不变更
Oh, no, no. Not change.
保留
Save.
好吧
All right.
知道我想看什么吗
Hey, you know what I'd like to see?
一整晚的《威尔和格蕾丝》
A whole night of Will & Grace.
你不想吗
Wouldn't you?
聪明
Brilliant!
这样更好
Hey, better yet,
不如放一晚的威尔一晚的格蕾丝
why don't we make one night Will, one night Grace?
所以我已经得出结论
So I've come to the conclusion
纽约是这世上最性感的
that New York is the sexiest city
城市
in the world,
从性感的布朗克斯到迷人的布鲁克林
from sexy Bronx to sexy Brooklyn.
这是座从不入眠的城市
It's the city that never sleeps.
除非它翻云覆雨
Unless it rolls over
性♥爱♥后昏睡过去
and passes out after sex.
迪克我刚写了点很棒的东西
Ooh, Dick, I just wrote something so great!
唐
Don!
你来了真是难以相信
You're here. I can't believe it.
是啊终于来了
Yeah, finally.
跨区交通真是一塌糊涂
Crosstown traffic was a bitch.
杰弗里
Jeffrey.
喂是我
Yeah? It's me.
关闭第五大道和大桥
Close 5th Avenue and the bridge.
告诉吹牛老爹
Oh, and tell Puff Daddy
我午餐要迟到了
I'm gonna be late for lunch.
唐你真是变样了
Don, you're so different.
什么意思
How do you mean?
没事
Oh, nothing.
我只是有点小震惊
I'm just-- a little overwhelmed.
我以前觉得你穿制♥服♥很性感
I mean, I thought you were hot in a uniform,
可这身西装性感多了
but this is way better.
我以前穿制♥服♥
When I was in uniform?
我这辈子从来没穿过制♥服♥
I've never worn a uniform in my life.
对我知道
Oh, no, I know that.
我只是说
I just meant like, you know,
你打领带穿西装
your tie and suit.
尽管你穿着...
Although you wear the--
你不是每天都穿这身
You don't wear the same thing every day,
-所以这不是一身制... -莎莉
- so it's not a unif... - Sally!
你是在对我说疯话吗
Are you going nuts on me?
听着
Listen.
我想要个女友不想要个疯子[坚果]
I want a girlfriend. I don't want a nut.
我想要坚果的话去坚果店就好了
I want a nut, I go to the nut store.
杰弗里
Jeffrey.
没事吧奥维尔市长
Is everything okay, Mayor Orville?
我走了
I'm leaving.
奥维尔市长
Mayor Orville?
纽约市市长奥维尔
Mayor of New York City Orville?
天啊
Oh, my God,
我是市长的女友
I'm the girlfriend of the mayor.
再见莎莉
Good-bye, Sally.
不不不唐求你别走
No, no, no! Don, please don't go.
听着如果我有些小疯癫
Listen. If I get a little crazy,
只能说明我太想你了
it's just that I miss you so much, you know?
市长先生
Mr. Mayor.
把大城市握于手掌心的先生
Mr. Big City in the palm of his hand.
盛情难却
Well...
那就半小时吧
half-hour.
纽约真是不可思议
New York is so fantastic.
我的工作太美妙了唐在这里
I have the coolest job. Don's here.
另外他是市长我从没这么幸福过
Plus, he's mayor. I've never been happier.
听上去还不错我为你激动
That sounds wonderful. I'm thrilled for you.
-真的很激动 -发自真心吗
- Seriously. Thrilled. - Are you really?
当然没你疯了吗
No! What are you, crazy?
我好失落我想回家
I'm depressed. I want to go home.
我还没找到玛丽
I haven't found Mary yet.
你会找到她的
Oh, you'll find her.
不我四处都找了
No, I've looked everywhere.
我查了纽约大学和哥伦比亚大学的教职工名单
I've checked the faculties at NYU and Columbia.
我连斯塔顿岛美容学院都找过了
I even tried the Staten Island Academy of Beauty.
完全没她的下落
No Mary Albright.
不过他们都快说服我做
Although they almost talked me into
四块钱的电烫了
their $4 perm.
迪克你不如
Look, Dick, why don't you
试着找找别人
just try to find somebody else?
我找了可四块钱做电烫已经算很便宜了
I looked, but $4 is a very competitive price for a perm.
好吧让我给你点小建议
Okay, let me give you a little piece of advice.
你的痛苦是咎由自取
You only have yourself to blame for being miserable.
我情不自禁
I can't help it.
我很不满意这次的经历
I'm having a real problem with this whole experience.
太肤浅了
It's so... so superficial.
老天
Oh, God.
不我想玛丽我想念爱情
No, I miss Mary. I miss love.
爱情是真实的
Love is real.
不性才是真实的不管有没有爱
No, sex is real with or without love.
的确没有爱的性有一席之地
Granted, sex without love has its place--
通常在聚会上一堆外套下
usually at a party under a pile of coats--
可没有真爱的生活
but life without true love
是毫无意义的
is completely meaningless.
好了迪克我们身处纽约
Okay, Dick, we're in New York.
你何不放轻松呢
Why don't you just lighten up?
我不想放轻松
I don't want to lighten up.
为什么我们得不断
Why is it that we need to constantly
让自己受干扰不去深入思索人生呢
distract ourselves from life's deeper concerns?
我的天看看这些鞋子
Oh, my God, look at those shoes.
好极了我这是在对牛弹琴
Terrific, I'm talking philosophy with Ivana Trump.
听着我得见个新客户
Look, I got to see a new client.
回聊
I'll talk to you later.
8号♥ 9号♥ 就是这里
8...9. Here's the place.
里昂你在这里干什么
Leon, what are you doing here?
我在这里工作伙计
I work here, buddy.
你不是该在上课吗
Shouldn't you be in class?
不用上学今天是国定假日
School's off. It's a national holiday.
今天是"公牛"塞米·格拉瓦诺的生日
It's Sammy "The Bull" Gravano's birthday!
[著名黑帮二把手后转做污点证人]
你是所罗门吗
Are you Solomon?
斯塔威克
Strudwick!
是的斯塔威克神父
Yes. Father Strudwick.
是我叫你来的
I'm the one who called you.
斯塔威克神父
Father Strudwick?
你是说你是神父
You mean you're a priest?
我要你帮忙
I need your help.
我被起诉挪用捐款